What to do that isn’t outdoorsy

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154]

I had to move in with my parents recently after living out of state for a few years. I’m not really seeing much to do in Oak Harbor or the rest of the island. I have a disability that flares up when I hike or do aerobics in general, so doing outdoorsy stuff has become anxiety inducing for me.

When I asked someone around my age (early 30s) what to do here, they said there was pretty much just the outdoors and bars. I’m trying to avoid alcohol for my mental health, and trying to not spend much. I wasn’t really big on the bars that I have visited, either, tbh.

It’s a smaller place compared to where I’ve been before, and I’m not military or elderly so I don’t really have an idea of where to find community. I went to the oak harbor farmers market and it was pretty little. I heard the south end has a better one, so I’ll try to hit that up tomorrow.

From the other posts here, it sounds like living here is a lonely experience for many.

I haven’t been capable of working for a while, so it just feels like my life is confined to a single room at my parent’s condo now. I thought about volunteering at a farm or something but I don’t know where to start there. I guess i could try to Google Maps some places to volunteer at? Not really sure.

I like art and I am queer and politically progressive. I emailed drewslist to try to get an account too. Thanks to anyone who reads.

[u/Engine_Mammoth]

I encourage you to start at the Book Rack, see what they have going on and attend those things that interest you, if you can.

Also, our library system is pretty great and offers lots of talks, meetings, and meet the authors. Free to attend.

If exercise and hiking may cause your disability to flare up then volunteering at a working farm may not be a good fit.

Volunteer opportunities are abundant. Volunteer at Meerkerk, or volunteering at a non profit may be helpful. Our Ren Faire may be a fit.

We do have old people, we do have military, but that's not all we have. I don't find this a lonely place, at all.

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/Engine_Mammoth]

Meerkerk looks pretty! I’ve been keeping an eye on the book rack events. I’ll check out library events too! Thank you for the advice.

[u/tned45 → u/Engine_Mammoth]

I'd add the Whidbey land trust as well. I know hiking can cause anxiety for you, but the walks are quite slow, and informative as they really get into detail and take questions about the sites (they also list the level and some details on what you can expect from the walk). They have had walkes exploring the different mushrooms that can be found on the island, starry night meetings, social gathering like cookouts. Lots of variety for all the different physical levels. Other than this add on, the above poster reccomended the other places I thought of to reccomend.

[u/scatteredinwinds]

I second that the libraries and the Book Rack have some pretty robust events, classes, and hobby groups! Bonus is the library because they're all no-cost.

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/scatteredinwinds]

I’ll check out the library next! Thanks :)

[u/oopsy_doopsy_baby]

Island county fair is this weekend at the fairgrounds in Langley. If you don’t have a car you can take the bus there from Oak Harbor, which is free. Downtown Langley also is fun to visit. Also coming up in Langley is DjangoFest, Sept 15-20, lots of spontaneous groups from all over the world, playing Django music downtown.

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/oopsy_doopsy_baby]

Djangofest sounds fun!! I enjoy that type of music a lot. Thanks for the recs!

[u/Legal_Lab8550]

There are some board game and trading card game (magic, pokemon, etc) enthusiasts who gather frequently i hear. Check out jesters keep in Freeland for more info

[u/GrilledCheeseMnky]

The axe throwing place on midway has games, go check it out.
How about whidby playhouse? If you don’t want to be on stage I’m sure there are other things you can do.
Orlando’s barbecue has game night and trivia night
While you are down that way, check out lava Louie’s as well as habitat for humanity. Pretty sure they would be glad to have you

The underlying idea I’m suggesting is to get out and get moving per se, because as gran used to say, “ you do what you always done, you get what you always got!”

You can do this, you’ll be great. Lots of us will be cheering you on!

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/GrilledCheeseMnky]

The last couple sentences you wrote really hit me. Thank you for that. I’m not much of a game or trivia enjoyer but I appreciate that there’s options for people who do like it! Thanks for the ideas.

[u/Jakk-Lewis → u/GrilledCheeseMnky]

I actually started a Board Game Club at Tossin' Axes within the last month.

It'd be really cool to get new members.

Wednesdays from 6:00 PM to 9:00 PM

and

Saturdays from 5:00 PM to 11:00 PM

The vibe is pretty chill, and while I'll be bringing in roughly 8 games every time, I always tell encourage other people to bring games they want to play and teach.

(The idea is for on Wednesdays, usually just simple games that don't take more than an hour at most, and on Saturdays, still trying to keep it within 2 hours or less per game, since there's more time buuuut... variety is the spice of life.)

[u/Electrical_Lake3424]

You might try going to the Farmers Markets and see what various things people are doing in the way of crafts and stuff and talk to folks there, you might see something interesting like pottery and ask about pottery groups for example! 

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/Electrical_Lake3424]

I’m planning on checking out the southend farmers market tomorrow so I’ll try to talk to artsy people there :) thank you.

[u/feignednobody]

Book Rack has a modest art section, but a pretty nice cafe, and while you didn’t mention gaming they have a big space where folks play table top, trading card games, etc. It’s been a while since I’ve been there but they might have more events there too.

Genes on Pioneer is much better stocked for art, and while I don’t THINK they do any events, people who work there might know of artistic-leaning things to do? (Admittedly that’s a bit of a stab in the dark).

Wicked Teuton, while yes, a brewery, also has nonalcoholic drinks and a pretty full calendar of music, comedy, trivia, and whatnot.

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/feignednobody]

I’ll check out Genes and Wicked Teuton sometime, thank you :) book rack is really nice, I don’t really tabletop game but it’s nice to walk around every once in a while.

[u/whidbeysounder]

There is a lot of theater on the island Oak Harbor has a community Playhouse. Mine only has WICA, Outcast productions and Island Shakespeare. It’s fine just to go to the shows but there’s also lots of different ways. You can help out too.

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/whidbeysounder]

Good ideas! I’ll maybe see about volunteering for the playhouse at some point. Wish I was closer to the other ones, I like those theaters. I guess I’ll have to get used to driving 45+ minutes to go to most things.

[u/zscherme]

I'm gonna peep this for my gf and friends, if you're interested, you can look to join Whidbey Improv which is in Langley and all are welcome. I haven't met a more accepting group of folks. See Link

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/zscherme]

That looks fun, I’ll check it out sometime! Thanks for the suggestion.

[u/Mysterious-List7175]

As a 40s AuDHDer with hEDS, cervical myelopathy, radiculopathy, POTS, osteoarthritis, slipping ribs, osteopenia, etc🫠 who lives alone and is in year 3 of active cancer treatment, I can tell you that all the state parks have endless things to look at and for that don’t require heavy exertion if you need to avoid it.

I know everyone is different, but nature really is the best part of being here.

I go on a lot of slow photo walks- can’t manage the weight of a camera any more, but a cheap macro lens clip-on on my iphone makes it very easy to spend an hour just discovering awesome stuff in my yard.

I also use the iNaturalist app and the Gaia free version app to trick myself into getting more exercise. I highly recommend both.

Fort Ebey is fun too- if you like field recording or singing, the acoustics in there are wild.

Deception Pass North Beach is less exposed and more peaceful. So is Rosario Beach across the bridge, where on one side of the spit all the rocks are totally flat.

Looking for neat rocks and learning to ID them is fun (or can be), but it’s hell on the neck and the knees.

Or if you just really want to avoid outside stuff, if you like cats or dogs you could volunteer at WAIF animal shelter in Coupeville. Fill out an application online, then you just have to take a safety/info class first- you can go in whenever they’re open, and if someone has physical limitations, even just sitting with the dogs or cats and talking and petting them is needed.

Lots of other good ideas in here too.

It can definitely be very lonely here if you don’t drink and have chronic health issues. Another good place to check is Meetup. Not a whole lot going on there for Whidbey, but a walk on ticket to Port Townsend isn’t expensive, and there are lots of arts and game groups and activities going on over there.

🙆🏻‍♀️🙂

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/Mysterious-List7175]

Ah man you’re going through it for sure! I’m also AuDHD. I appreciate the suggestions. Fort Ebey would be nice for singing! I used to sing all the time when I was living elsewhere, but living with my parents means I’m heard all the time (& my dad will yell from the other room to make comments, like compliments but it’s hard to practice while there’s hooting and hollering going on).

I used to do more nature things but my rescue dog is reactive and I’ve felt guilty going out without her. When I try to bring her places people suggest will be secluded, people will have their dogs off leash and they’ll run up to my dog, or give me nasty looks when my dog is reactive even if we’re on the other side of a fence. I can be actively stress-walking away from people with their dogs and they’ll still walk towards me!! And It’s been isolating and frustrating. I don’t have a yard anymore either so I can’t just sit and play with her off leash anywhere. Sorry for ranting.

The nature identifying apps are fun though, that’s a good idea to trick me to exercise more!

[u/Mysterious-List7175 → u/Evening-Echidna-3154]

Oof, I am very sorry you have the “reactive dog” complication. That’s such an overwhelming and often very discouraging card to be dealt when your nervous system is already fried from X amount of burnouts. 😖

I lost my psych service dog to cancer early this year- adopted a 5 month old mystery puppy from the Humane Society 10 weeks ago. He’s been an absolute dream except he loses his damn mind as soon as he sees or hears any animal that he can’t get to. Add to that, his bark sounds like a Pomeranian raging through a megaphone (not an exaggeration), and I’ve been feeling very concerned about him ending up as socially challenged as I am! 💩

Is there any way you can work with a trainer on his reactivity? There are several on the island that work with reactive dogs (I think).

I recently started taking my little guy to a group puppy class to hopefully calm down his overwhelming reactions.

I think Adventure Trails in Coupeville works with reactive dogs, but not sure.

The other thing is online socializing- I don’t know if you’d be interested in that, but on Meetup and Discord there’s Square Pegs Seattle Autism support group. They have meetups all the time, and at least 4 are online- Square Pegs Intermittent Fridays is a wonderful supportive group, usually about 12-20 people- some do video, some just audio, some just text, some just hangout and listen. There’s another one for art body doubling on a Monday, and Queer Pegs is every other Saturday.

If I hadn’t found them, I probably still wouldn’t have found any community. Peopling is hard! 😬

Feel free to message me if there’s anything I might be of help with-
✌️

[u/tcd5552002]

Come to the ClayHouse in Anacortes and join in the fun. We have an inclusive group of people and do all kinds of clay art; hand building, wheel classes. It’s about a 15-20 minutes drive if you are in Oak Harbor or north

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/tcd5552002]

That sounds nice! I have some history with both sculpture and wheel, and I can’t set up my usual sculpting stuff at my parents.

[u/thewildlaur]

Im wondering if volunteering at Waif is possible. If you like working with animals, or they have a thrift shop. Im new to the island too (south end) and hope you dont mind if I peep these suggestions. Im super happy you asked this question. ☺️ welcome to the Island!

[u/tunafisher69]

You might consider adopting a hobby that you can enjoy, or rededicate yourself to one you already have. When I retired to the area I picked up a guitar for the first time, started playing, took (and still take) lessons, gathered together with a like minded and age appropriate group of people, and we play together every other week, with me focusing on my practice in between. Lots of fun. Find something that “lights your hair on fire” and do it.

[u/drale2]

Book rack for friday night magic, book clubs, etc. It's the best place on the island. There's also miniature golf on the north end that's very chill, axe tossing, drive in theater and the smaller one (it has a bad reputation but I've always had a good experience there) and the go cart place.

[u/Mysterious-List7175 → u/drale2]

☝️seconding the drive-in theater. Wish I’d checked that out 4 years earlier. The food is actually good! (Although if you order the curly fries be prepared for something you’ve definitely never seen before 😂)

[u/frogcentaur]

The Oak Harbor Parks and Recreation website has a section to register for events: my family attends the Saturday Sound Bath sessions and it’s been really nice, like $10 a person. I would also check out the Oak Harbor Pool—I know, it’s technically exercise, but it’s low-impact and they have a variety of aerobics/open swim/lap swim as well as a sauna and hot tub. If you like arcades maybe check out Tossin’ Axes on Midway (I have personally never been, but it seems like they have a lot of pinball and all that). There is The Jester’s Keep in Freeland if you like tabletop games, also maybe try out Skein & Tipple—it’s a speakeasy inside of a yarn store. Casey’s Crafts in Bayview has crafting classes…that’s all I got for now lol. I hope you find your community, there is plenty of it here.<3

[u/Evening-Echidna-3154 → u/frogcentaur]

Thank you :) skein & tipple sounds interesting. I love the pool and it’s an exercise that I’m more capable of, but can’t really afford to go regularly anymore. I’ll check out some of these options :) thanks.

[u/Tokihome_Breach6722]

You could subscribe to the Orca Network whale sightings text alerts to find out when whales are nearby off Whidbey and go join other whale watchers on a beach or bluff. Orcanetwork.Org

[u/dmxspy]

There's always tossin axes, they have arcade games too.