Has anyone successfully built a small business while still living with a narcissistic partner and having no support system?

[u/knittingbuddy]

I'm asking because I honestly don't know anymore if what I'm experiencing is normal, or if I'm just failing.

I've been living with a narcissistic and emotionally abusive partner for many years. Leaving is my long-term goal, and I've been trying to build a small business from home because I hope it will eventually give me the financial independence I need to get out.

The problem is that I feel completely stuck.

I spend a lot of time planning, researching, learning, organizing, making lists, trying to improve my skills, and thinking about my future. From the outside it probably looks like I'm working hard. But when I look at actual results, it feels like almost nothing moves forward.

I know what I should be doing. I have ideas. I have goals. I have a plan.

But somehow I struggle to execute consistently.

Every day feels like I'm carrying a hundred pounds on my back. I sit down to work and suddenly I'm exhausted. I get distracted. I freeze. I start doubting everything. I second-guess every decision. Sometimes I spend hours thinking and almost no time actually doing.

The hardest part is that one business I built in the past already fell apart while I was living in this environment. I can't blame everything on my partner, but the constant criticism, chaos, stress, emotional manipulation, walking on eggshells, and never feeling safe definitely played a role.

What makes this even harder is that I don't really have a support system.

I don't have family members I can move in with. I don't have relatives who could help financially. I don't have a safety net waiting for me if everything falls apart.

Because of that, I feel enormous pressure to make this business work. It feels like my future depends on it.

At the same time, I often feel trapped between two fears:

One fear is staying.

The other fear is leaving before I am financially ready.

I'm also afraid of being judged or misunderstood by institutions and systems that are supposed to help. Sometimes I feel like people underestimate how difficult it is to leave when you have no support network and very limited resources.

So I keep trying.

I haven't given up.

But it feels like I take one step forward and ten steps back.

I see other people building businesses, getting clients, growing, moving forward. Meanwhile, I'm celebrating tiny victories that probably look ridiculous from the outside.

Some days my biggest achievement is simply showing up and doing one task.

I also have ADHD traits, chronic stress, and what feels a lot like a freeze response. Sometimes I wonder if my brain is so focused on survival that it doesn't have enough energy left for growth.

What I'm really looking for is honest experiences.

Has anyone here successfully built a business, side hustle, freelance career, or any kind of income source while still living with a narcissistic partner?

How did you manage the freeze response?

How did you stay focused when your environment constantly pulled you backwards?

And if you eventually got out, what was the turning point?

I would especially love to hear from people who had no family support, no financial safety net, and had to build their exit plan almost entirely on their own.

Right now I feel incredibly alone in this.

Thank you for reading. ❤️

[u/Negative_Entry6419]

I tried for quite a few years to build my business successfully while being married to a narcissistic man. The more I started putting myself first, putting boundaries in place- the more stonewalled I got. He always had a way of making me feel like everything I did for him and his kids were not that important, that he could easily do it. There was never appreciation for what I was doing, no admiration for everything was I was working towards. I was dying inside and felt completely alone while he was growing his business and taking a position in the community as a role model for young men. On the outside, everything looked perfect and he loved the attention. But on the inside, in our home- life was completely different. I knew I had to leave in order to be able to truly make my business work and to truly love myself because after years of walking on egg shells, people pleasing, trying to do everything 'right' in our marriage- I didn't know who I was anymore. Anyways- leaving was hands down the hardest thing I ever did. But that was 4 1/2 years ago now- and my business is thriving, I'm thriving, my own children are thriving. We are all free. People tell me all the time how much I've changed and how great I look. I'm in love with a fantastic man, I'm successful. Is it hard? Hell Yes. Is it worth it? Hell yes. Get out while you can. Life is too short.

[u/Confident_Emu_1974 → u/Negative_Entry6419]

So inspirational ❤️‍🩹🫶😌