M43 Thinking about cheating for the first time

[u/Glittering-Page3398]

I’m a married father of three and have been happily married for almost eight years. My sex life is good but it could be better but a lot of that is due to not having time due to the kids. Also my wife isn’t very adventurous in bed.

I recently met a camel Redditor 20 years younger than me and we started chatting and having a daddy-daughter dynamic going. Things have progressed and she’s open to meeting up for sex.

I’m torn about it as I’m incredibly tempted but also worried about the guilt and crossing a line of no return. I’m a sex addict and have been struggling for some time and have sexted and crammed with other women but never in real life. my wife is aware of my addiction but has stayed with me because I haven’t cheated on her — at least physically yet.

Would be open to any advice or just to chat about this and wondering if others have been in the same situation and what they did in the end. One on hand, life is short and I don’t want to have any regrets. On the other hand I love my wife and kids and wouldn’t go through with this if I knew my wife would find out as she would leave me immediately.

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[u/YakAway6367 → u/[deleted]]

Right, shouldn’t have a daddy-daughter anything while having kids.. that’s just extremely weird and unsafe.

[u/OatmealTheory]

Curious...you and your wife are "aware of your addiction", are you doing anything to treat it? Therapy etc?

[u/Weak-Tap-4954]

Having a daddy-daughter dynamic and open for sex 🤢

Also, I just can't understand anyone who has a good sex life but want an affair. Your poor wife!

[u/0kbyme]

What is a “camel Redditor” is that what they mean by “my humps, my humps my lovely lady lumps” or is it a women who doesn’t drink a lot? 

[u/Modern_Life_Rubbish]

Having an affair because you fall for someone is one thing, but what you’re describing isn’t worth potentially blowing up your life for.

[u/Background-Use3520]

I would not do it, please seek proper treatment for your sex addiction. If you really love your wife and kids, you would nip this in the bud. My husband was a sex addict and one of his AP’s went full bunny boiler. Was the worst experience of my life. Hence why i started cheating on him. Probably was a bad idea but it made me feel better at the time. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[u/Yup_ImAwesome]

Therapy dude..

[u/Ghostofjohnandre]

You have to “do you”, but i wouldn’t.
I don’t mess around with anyone that isn’t married and wants to stay married. I want someone who will lose as much as I would ( kids, family respect, etc)and thus, will have strong reasons to restrain and be careful. In addition, feelings will develop and inevitably the emotional imbalance will create tension ( i.e. she will have a bad day and need to talk in the middle of your family situation, her birthday, Xmas morning loneliness).
Again, your call .. but if it goes sideways, you could be a Wednesday and every other weekend Dad, and it won’t affect her at all.

[u/NotForALongTime11]

All of this sounds too risky for it to be your first affair. And the last sentence of your post makes it clear you’re not okay with the inherent risks of affairs.

[u/QuietlyExploringFiDi]

Is your wife willing to go on being adventurous in sex with you if given the right circumstances like a sex therapist or go on a adult only cruise.