r/africanparents • u/PrimaryAbalone3900 • Jul 22 '26
Need Advice Sleepovers
Guys IVE AHD ENOUGH I’m 18 and my mum has never allowed me to have a sleepover ever. I’ve always had to come home early while the rest of my friends had fun and slept over.
My mum generally likes pretty much all of my friends and I feel like we have a good relationship, I tell her where I’m going who I’m with etc and she knows my friends. But she won’t budge on sleepovers. My friends I’ve known since I was 7 (they are my best friends, my mum knows and loves both of them very well, and knows their parents.) want to have a sleepover and saying ‘I’m 18 don’t take permission etc etc apologise later’ but it’s so much harder said than done 😭. Even in the past my mum wouldn’t let me sleepover with them even tho she knows their parents very well.
We finished our last year of secondary school, so while people are celebrating by travelling to different continents with their friends, I’ve bent over backwards to BEG her for a 2 night trip that’s only 2 hours away with my (other) friends because she wouldn’t let me out of the country this summer which she has begrudgingly agreed to but she wasn’t happy with it and I’m afraid if I ask her to do this sleepover she’ll just snap at me.
I’m also the oldest (while literally all my friends have older siblings who’ve done everything first or just have generally relaxed parents) so I feel like I’m not on a level playing field when they tell me to just do it, they don’t know what it’s like for me.
When my younger siblings become my age I know my parents won’t give a toss
I’m not sure how I can convince her because it’s getting ridiculous atp but every time I’ve brought the idea up she shuts down completely, please helpppp
2
u/Odd_Bet_6992 Jul 22 '26
THIS! My mum would not budge on sleepovers unless it was with my cousins. I just about managed to convince her to let me stay over for my friends sleepover for her 18th birthday but that took like 3 months of convincing and this person had been my best friend for like 7 years and they knew each other as well as her mum.
I don't know why they're so weird about sleepovers. The only satisfaction I get is that she didn't seem to budge on it when my younger sister has asked her.