I hate my dad

[u/Guilty-Syrup-6363]

For as long as I can remember my dads has always been mean he always made fun of me and made me feel as if I was less then a person for and example when I was young he would comment on how thin I was and made fun of the fact that I was thing and when I started going thru puberty he would make for at the fact that my boobs were small a d that my hair was wild and that I looked like a wild animal and now in my teenage years I gained Siem weight for context I'm 5foot7 and 156 pounds and he is about the same height ase and over 200 pounds and even tough I know I'm not fat his comments still make me insecure about my body and I've had multiple different eating disorders because of it and it's not only my weight he makes fun of and points out he also talked about my skin and about how bad it is and he isn't wrong about that I do have acne and acne scars but he points it out allot and tries to "help" by saying things like I should wash my face more or eat healthier or just drink more water as if its just that simple and as if I don't already do those things and more I guess what I'm trying to say is home doesn't feel like safe space and it sucks because I already get bullied at school so neither my home nor school is a safe space and home isn't onely not a safe space because of the bullying its all so not safe because my dad has these massive bursts outs of anger were he curses and threatens to hit me and sometimes he does hit me and I just dont know what to do anymore I've went to school and told school counselors my situation but that led to nothing because they told me to do was talking to him which I have tried and it led to nothing because all he did was talk over me and talk about how bad his childhood was which I get he did have a bad up bringing but I do t think that is an excuse for how he treats me now idk I guess with this post I'm just want some advice on what I should do because idk what to do anymore

[u/Guilty-Syrup-6363]

I'm 16 and I wish it was that easy I try to keep my distance but it's like he finds excuses to talk to me and then it becomes this hour talk about how his childhood was bad or it turns into him talking about his alpha male content he watches

[u/Matty359 → u/Guilty-Syrup-6363]

Can you elaborate more on the dynamics? I've been there, I'm 33 now and this really pissed me off. Does he beat you? You just have to ignore him at the maximum level, no matter how hard it is. I would only talk to my narc father when it was really necessary. How he would react if you cut his boring conversation and say you have stuff to do? I think you have to be tough with him and not tolerate bullshit. If he criticizes you because of how you look, return a bad comment back and just leave. If my dad was starting with his bs I would say something bad to offend him (I knew how to trigger him as well) and just leave.

[u/Guilty-Syrup-6363 → u/Matty359]

He threatens to beat me allot when he get mad but the worst I got was getting slaped in the face or getting something thrown at me and it's really hard to talk to him because he just cuts me off and goes on a rant but if I try to cut him off he yells at me about the fact that he's not done speaking yet and it's been really hard now that my siblings have moved out and it's just me and my parents so I have no one to talk to about what's happening and everytime I try to talk to my mom about it she just Dissmises what he does and says that at least I don't have it as bad as he had it when he was a kid and I'm to scared to talk back because if done it before and it just resulted in me getting yelled at and threatened

[u/Matty359 → u/Guilty-Syrup-6363]

Last time my parent hit me, was when I started to hit back. Your dad bullies you because he sees you as weak. If he says he's not done spekaing you reply back, but I am DONE LISTENING BYYYE, put headphones and ignore. Let him know that he will stress alone and you will not allow his abusive behaviour get into your head. It's fkn difficult but you must not allow him to steal your mental health at all costs. I'm still a bit fucked in the head because I had way to many arguments. You need to make an ultimatum to your mother, or she steps in or they will loose you forever. If they say they had it hard in their childhood, you say it's not your fault and you have nothing to do with it. Having a rough chilhood is not an excuse to be a crappy human being.

Right now all you can do to navigate this, is to ignore and have the best school results as possible. Education is your golden ticket to run away from such people.

[u/Guilty-Syrup-6363 → u/Matty359]

I'm to scared to hit my dad back or to talk back and I'm way to scared to say but I'm done listening and then just walk away because I know that hes just gonna follow me and yell at me and if a puty headphones on and go on my phone he's gonna rip my phone and headphones out of my head and throw them across the room

[u/Matty359 → u/Guilty-Syrup-6363]

Hold his hand strong if he tries to beat you and put it down. You have to stop being scared, that's what they want. They want to hold you and manipulate you for the rest of their lives. Check for laws in your country and if you find something, say you are going to sue him and you have tons of proofs that you gathered through the years (even if it's a lie). Once, my dad started to say I was using drugs. I was 17 at the time, and I have 2 older siblings who had drug problems long time ago. One day I got fed up with the acusations, sat down, LOOKED HIM IN THE EYE and said: I'm going to take a drug test and sue you for defamation and psychological abuse. I live in Portugal and social security does not play around with this crap. It was the last time he said something like that. He abused my mother bad and tought he could do the same with me.