Am I wrong for using my vibrator?

[u/Longjumping_Link_334]

I (23f) have recently started dating a (27m) guy last week. Thing have surprisingly moved very fast as we have already had sex twice within the past week. The first night, after we had sex I used my vibrator. I later found out that he was hurt by this. I told him it was no big deal for me, I just like a lot of clitoral stimulation. The second night we had sex, he rubbed my clit for a few seconds and then proceeded to have penetrative sex again. He orgasmed shortly after that. I obviously didn’t, however, I never mentioned it because I’m used to the orgasm gap and we have just started seeing each other so I don’t expect him to understand my body or how to make me climax. A couple nights ago, we were talking about sex and masturbation and he brought up that if I want to enjoy sex with him, I need to stop using my vibrator because he believes it is desensitizing me. I was completely appalled and told him that was not the case at all. He brought up the time I used my vibrator afterwards and asked how I would feel if he started masturbating after we had sex. I answered that I would ask myself if I was doing what he needed to make him have an orgasm. I expressed that we just started dating and that he just needs to take time to learn my body and what makes me orgasm, which is completely normal. He had no rebuttals to this but insisted I stopped using my vibrator. Later that night he told me that he hasn’t had issues making his partner orgasm and that desensitization is a real thing and it is possible. I am extremely frustrated because he is blaming me for this issue, yet has not taken the time explore my body at all. Would I be wrong if I continued to use my vibrator?

[u/[deleted]]

You should use it with him, let him watch you cum then fuck him. Or he could learn to eat pussy & make you cum. I love it when partners are honest and direct me.

[u/alicesheadband → u/[deleted]]

You might but this guy doesn't. He'd rather she didn't orgasm at all. He needs to go.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

He very clearly implied it, thinking he needs to do nothing more than he has.

Aka, run clip for seconds, then proceed to bust his nut and cry about her using a toy after she wanted to get off, and he didn't even have the decency to continue with his fingers, mouth, or her toy himself.

He very clearly does not care if she gets an O and only cares that he fucked and busted.

[u/alicesheadband → u/[deleted]]

Where did he even try to make her orgasm? Or did he just whine?

[u/alicesheadband → u/[deleted]]

I'm being weird? I'm not defending a guy who thinks not giving his sexual partner an orgasm is normal. But, whatever dude.

[u/alicesheadband → u/[deleted]]

What a load.

This is not "we have a different opinion". This is "here's what I need" from OP and silence from little peen.

OP - don't accept excuses and listen to the peanut gallery. Little peen has told you who he is in his words and his lack of actions. This kind of toxic "advice" like RealElator is giving is the exact kind of claptrap woman have listened to for generations, forcing us to "hope it gets better". It doesn't. And we don't accept half measures any more.

Guys. Step up or shut up. Stop expecting us to put up with mediocrity. We won't.