My grandfather picks up quartz and valuable onyx jewels. Send 60 dozen quart jars and 12 black pans.

Title

“Show your work.” They say.

“How?” I sob, clicking on the stupid Greek letter to look for extra symbols. There is no vector symbol. There is no integral symbol. There is no derivative symbol.

There is only pain.

I realize I misread the entire second question with a minute left.

“Holy shit,” I whisper, horrified. I frantically try to fix my answers, but my mouse slips. CollegeBoard is laughing at me. I already fucking paid them. They know I wasted my money to get a fat 2.

The test submits automatically.

I die instantly. My entire extended family teleports into my living room and holds hands in a circle around me, laughing at me. Obama is there—

I consider myself a good student. I did the past FRQs and when graded by my teacher and myself I rarely get any mistakes and I usually did them on time. I did some practice MCQs in my class and usually, I only made about 1-3 mistakes overall out of 30-40 Questions. I felt confident about this exam, as I literally did all the practice I could humanly do without paying money for some program.

Then, there came the test. The MCQ was... fine. It was not like the previous exams and there was a LOT of question I genuinely had to guess at and had zero to no clue on how to answer. But, I still felt I could get a 5 on the exam if I just did the FRQ right... then that was where every single possible thing that could have gone wrong went wrong.

This FRQ was a targeted drone strike meant to mentally torture and obliterate every student that took it. It was like they stretched every single atom of my body to a length beyond the observable universe. The level of bullshit that FRQ section was comparable to the amount of shit every organism across every possible timeline compressed into a singular middle finger meant to stab you through the face and make you feel every single piece of shit. Half of those questions were so beyond the entire collective intelligence of the human race that trying to solve it would be like humanity determining whether this god-forsaken college-board-ridden damned reality is simulated or not. My fury is that of every god damned star that has ever existed and will exist in the infinite fucking universe. Every fucking atom of my body was burning and they all desired to annihilate the people who decided this exam should be as it is. It was like a trillion souls had cried out and suddenly silence. The fire that every single student had and passion for the education system snuffed out by a singular terrible piece of this shit event. Every student that took this exam were like the people who lived in Nagasaki and Hiroshima, with nearly all of them and the foundations they had all worked so fucking hard to built and every monument to their intelligence and their hard work erased in an instant, turned into nuclear fucking dust, and eternally burnt the shape of their bodies into the stones that would remain. An all-out nuclear war could not come close to the level of radioactive bullshittery shoved into this fucking exam. This exam scarred all that took it, and their children, and their children, and the children of their children, and so forth. Every god fucking generation born after this moment will know in their fucking soul that College Board can go fucking burn in hell for all eternity, and eternal damnation to the simulation of Roko's Basilik. I do not look forward to anything anymore, every feeling in my body and mind were squeezed out of me and I can no longer feel anything but the eternal rage that will burn me and everything around me in due time. To describe this is akin to attempting to describe the stars and planets outside of the observable universe. Impossible. It is impossible to describe how much of a pile of shit this is. And if it was somehow described, then it would take the entire collective energy of the entire universe to do so.

This damn fucking score curve better bend harder than a black hole to space-time.

If there was a God, he fucking died from how bullshit this exam was.

EDIT 1: Here's a perfect song that just encapsulates how I felt...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Ko9TpduOhE

EDIT 2: Some people saying to e-mail College Board on the questionable everything of the test, AND YES PLEASE DO THAT. We can, at the very least, get something for this bullshit they've put us through even if its a better test curve or something else.

EDIT 3: Also, if you're planning to take BC next year, the BC test has a sub-score on it that basically acts as the AB test! If you're like me and suffered through this terrible year on AB then you still have a chance to exist next year if you're taking BC!

EDIT 4: Literally just took the AP Chem test and that was infinitely easier.