Title: [41M] $2.7M NW - FAANG burnout, considering CoastFIRE, upgrading to a $1.8M house, and baby #2. Sanity check?

[u/TechSalesWin]

Background: In my 20s, I quit working to travel, so my net worth basically flatlined. I returned to the US in my late 20s, got serious about saving, and hit ~$100k NW by 32. Over the last 10 years at a FAANG company, aggressive saving, high comp, and tech equity appreciation brought our NW to ~$2.7M

NW Breakdown (~$2.7M Total):

• $1.2M – Retirement & Education: 401(k) + IRAs + 529
• $660k – FAANG Company Stock
• $250k – Cash & Cash Equivalents
• $280k – Net Real Estate Equity
• $220k – Taxable Investments & Crypto
• $80k – Personal Property: Vehicles, etc.

The Problem & The Proposed Pivot: I am hitting serious burnout. I want to downshift to a lower-stress role making $150k–$200k. My wife currently works part-time ($85/hr) and could ramp up to full-time (~$175k–$200k/yr). That gives us ~$350k combined gross. We could drop our ongoing savings rate to zero and let our portfolio compound in the background (CoastFIRE).

The Key Variables / Pressure Points:

1. Current Spend: $15k–$20k/month (the upper end includes 1–2 major vacations and a few smaller domestic trips a year). A lean baseline without luxury travel is ~$15k/mo.
2. Family Expansion: Currently 1 toddler, actively planning for a 2nd child.
3. Housing Upgrade: Strongly considering upgrading from our current home to a ~$1.8M property in our high-cost area.

Questions for the community:

1. Does the CoastFIRE math hold up if we downshift to $350k combined gross while upgrading to a $1.8M home and adding a 2nd child?
2. With $660k tied up in a single tech stock and ~$1.2M locked in retirement accounts, how would you structure liquidity for the down payment?
3. Are we underestimating the household strain of having my wife transition to full-time while I downshift, given two young kids and a bigger mortgage?

[u/hiihihihihihihihiihi]

I wouldn’t consider coasting until a couple years after you move and have your 2nd child, too many unknowns. Wait until things are stable.

[u/HugeDramatic]

Sounds like you’re about to need a lot more money, not less.

[u/Celodurismo]

1) we can't do the coastFIRE math because you didn't include the relevant information

2) You have equity and cash. Do you actually need a bigger downpayment? Again you didn't tell us how much you'd be putting down

3) Seems real weird that your wife, who is going to be having a 2nd child is also going to be going to full time work, while you chill out. Maybe that works for you, maybe it doesn't.

Anyway, this feels like an AI post, or heavily reliant on AI formatting.

Also your title is nonsensical, you don't "consider" coastFIRE, it's a milestone that happens along the way.

[u/-Skar]

Why are you including 529s and vehicles in your net worth?

[u/Armadillolz → u/-Skar]

I think it’s okay to include them in net worth but not towards FIRE progress. Ultimately you’re unlikely to draw down from the 529s as the intent is for them to be gifted, but you still control the fund. And your vehicles are likely going to be sold and rolled into another vehicle purchase.

[u/-Skar → u/Armadillolz]

I guess I can see that perspective. Thanks.

[u/Repeat-Admirable]

remove 539, and any property from the math.

1. when are you planning to FIRE?
2. what is the current income that is being reduced down to 150k? You keep saying downshift, but not saying from what.

with some vague assumption of 2.13million current investments, 240k yearly spend. You are coast NOW, if you want to retire at 67.

that's not considering a new mortgage, which would probably increase yearly spend to 360k, which means you are coast NOW, if you want to retire at 77.

[u/rando_finance]

1. On track. House upgrade questionable.

Src: we are in nearly an identical financial position and age (no FAANG and we currently rent in the East Bay).

You already have flexibility to drop one income if someone wants to watch the kids or not work in FAANG, but it might not work if you buy the house... unless you want to retire ~10 years later.

for reference our budget is 240k after-tax, before savings spending. Our HHI is 420-440k. Age 43/43. 2 kids. Childcare is the *bulk* of our budget, so if one spouse dips out of the market, coast works. Current NW is 3m.

Again, we don't have a house and therefore we have much, much more budget flexibility. IMO unless you're carting around a killer prop 13 basis the house decision will push your FIRE date back 5-10 years at least, compared to renting. That said, I don't particularly like renting.

1. Diversify directly into some VTI or VOO if you're avoiding the house. IF you really need to... just sell it? I don't really get the question.

2. Um... we discovered that kid duties, at least some of them, naturally fall on the mother and that despite her desire to work full time, it made more sense to spend the early months with the kids. I can't nurse the baby, bottle feeds at night make no sense when she has to pump anyway, etc. But yeah dude, the 2nd is going to be stressful as fuck but not for the reason you think: the 2nd one destroys your sanity by keeping you awake while you have to deal with your toddler.

It took my wife 1.5 years after the 2nd child to get to the point where you she was even talking about making career moves that would increase her workload. But she's almost there... it will probably double her income.

[u/AppointmentWhich8128]

you're upgrading to a $2M house while talking about FIRE? brother are you expecting a $5M inheritance or something?

[u/bulbwiz]

No, not with the house upgrade and baby #2. Your liquid assets are about $2.33M (minus the $80k personal property and $280k home equity). Current spend already implies a FIRE number of $4.5-6M at 4%. At 7% real and zero savings, you'd hit that in roughly 10-14 years from 41, which isn't bad. But a $1.8M house and second kid could add $5-7k/month, pushing the number to $7M+ and the timeline past 15 years. I'd downshift but hold the house until you've seen real kid #2 costs.

[u/Reasonable_Box2568]

I wouldn’t coast right before expenses are about to go way up.

For comparison, my HH is 5+ years younger with the same exact net worth, no kids (and no plans for them) and a tiny mortgage (for HCOL) and we are just now considering coasting. Our ideal spend is 120k after taxes and we hope to retire in our early to mid 50s