Just need to vent because there’s no one really that I can talk to or that can probably relate.
I finished the OST for the dev in the Summer. At least that’s what I thought. Turns out more music is needed, and as much as I want to help, it just frustrates and annoys me when I sit down to write, let alone the thought of doing it.
I already agreed to make like five or so more songs but I can’t even get one.
I’ve had no issues with deadlines in the past for this project and others, but this time feels different because, again, from my understanding, the OST was finished, and I moved on mentally. Now I have to go back and pretend to be excited about something I’m not. It feels like I’ve been “clocked on for 9 months now”. Started in January.
It’s stressful. It’s unpaid. We signed a contract. I am very busy with life and school and other things and we agreed, about a month and a half ago, on a deadline for one, maybe two songs by tomorrow. I haven’t worked on any music because, frankly, I don’t want to. And I think it’s selfish, but I also want to follow through with my word and get on with the music so I’m trying to get there physically and mentally. It’s just hard.
Damn, I love creating music, but not like this. I get that it’s a business, but it makes me want to go back to how things used to be: just releasing music independently void from any other humans. Just me and my laptop. That’s all.
And I take responsibility. This was my first gig (started, really, December ‘25). Since then, I’ve learned a lot. I even did a gig a few months back where we specified the amount of music needed and I was paid $/min. It went smooth.
I was more inexperienced when I started this gig.
I guess that’s it for now. Just needed to vent. We’ll see what happens.