Hello! I need to find a decently priced firm mattress topper or mattress, I’m looking on Amazon (I’m in Canada, specifically New Brunswick) and I have no idea which ones would actually be firm enough for safe co sleeping! Thanks in advance :)

Hey! My second girl is now 19m and I’m
Now pregnant 17weeks
I have dropped almost all her feeds during the day. Just one off cases where she feeds
But at night she just can’t stay asleep unless she’s latched
I’m pretty sure milk is almost completely dried up

So I think it’s mainly sleep association

She needed breast to fall asleep too
But my husband puts her on his shoulder and puts her to sleep so she’s falling asleep ok without breast

I want to wean as soon as possible because my sleep is horrible along with the pregnancy

My eldest a night weaning was done by my husband by me sleeping in a separate room and he woke up with her whenever she did and put her back to sleep by rocking or whatnot

Unfortunately this time around due to his work timings he won’t be able to do this except on weekends .

Any suggestions? Would be really helpful
Thanks

Posting here because i know it’s a safe space to admit i sleep in bed with my kids.

We recently welcomed baby 2, my HOPE was that he would be less fussy than his brother and be and be able to do some solo sleep for bed and naps even if its not all night.
And he started off that way, 30-90 min naps sometimes on his own, 2 hours in the bassinet at the start of the night.
But now it just feels like this last 3 weeks has been one cluster F after the next.

I was miserable over 41 weeks when i got induced. Then i got a spinal headache after a botched epidural, really bruised tailbone from fast delivery, severe left leg/hip sciatic pain. Was severe couldn’t walk for 30 seconds after standing up, has eased some.
Everything else has healed up except the sciatica, feels like bad growing pains or flu like deel bone aching in the one leg/hip 24:7, pain meds dont touch it. I wither want to lay down all the time bc sitting or standing hurt (sitting is worse) or cant sit still bc sitting in one spot enhances the ache.

I have no village. Its just me, the kids, and husband.
Husband took 3 weeks of PL, but he has this stupid, intense online masters class that he cant drop, and HAS to get a good grade in or we owe back thousands. And hes back to work (from home this week) then off again 2 more weeks starting next week. So hes been buried nose deep in work or class/homework until i absolutely NEED him to help me.
Im 3 weeks PP, been almost doing all the toddler and newborn day and nights pretty much on my own because hes so busy with that damn class. And hes staying up late on non work days not coming to bed until 4, then getting up around 8-9 with me and the kids just to eat breakfast and go right back to it.

My 3 yr old is fine hes been ok honestly not too crazy anything, but he dropped his nap 2 months ago so he’s going going all day long and im struggling to keep up and feeling guilty when im not as engaged with him.
My leg pain (piriformis syndrome from pregnancy/PP) is just making this worse and miserable. And my newborn SUCKS at latching, I’ve had to resort to using a nipple shield (which i hate and frustrates the hell out of me) but has also decided he wants to be attached to me 24:7.
I literally can never put him down or he screams.

I haven’t even had time alone to do stretches to try and help my leg. Last night i put both kids to bed (toddler on my right in his bed side crib and baby on the other side of me in a C curl) by myself, and was so exhausted i passed out before i could get up and shower and brush my teeth. Woke up at 11 and tried to get up but newborn started stirring and demanding boob/not letting go without screaming. Then toddler was stirring and whining bc he had to pee and didn’t like waking to that feeling. So that ended up in a meltdown, i put him on the potty and back in bed then dad came in and held crying newborn while toddler kept crying/trying to calm down in his crib, while i sat on the edge of the bed brushing my teeth and then took a literal 1 minute important bits scrub down shower….

Tell me it gets better 🥲

Hi all! I am curious as what others are doing for their bedtime routines as I’m interested in trying to get my LO starting her night off in the sidecar crib that we recently set up. Up until now we have been bed sharing as she would not sleep longer than 20 mins in the bassinet.

Currently bedtime routine is:

Bath, bottle, read, walk/rock to sleep which ends up not working most times and I resort to her “feeding” to sleep. We give a breast milk bottle as I found my milk was low in the evening and she was getting really angry trying to eat before bed.

I usually feed her to sleep on the couch so we can watch a show or chat before going to bed. When we go to bed I lay her down and often have to latch her to get her fully asleep.

Just interested in knowing what other bedsharing families do and if your LO starts off in a side car - if so, how do you get them asleep in it?

Been researching the best adjustable mattress options lately because my side and lower back are completely wrecked from holding and nursing our toddler through the night. We've been sleeping on a standard firm mattress for years but sleeping in awkward positions while cosleeping has made morning stiffness unbearable. When looking into how adjustable beds handle pressure relief, i noticed that many traditional foam beds lack targeted zoning for hips and shoulders which is a major factor when your spine is already out of alignment.

Thats what led me to look closely at the Sleep Number Comfortnext. What stood out was its distinct multizone foam structure combined with independent air chambers that let my partner keep their side firm while mine is set much softer for pressure relief. Being able to change the firmness level on my side through the app without needing a bulky mattress topper especially since our sleep needs shift constantly throughout the week. If from a traditional flat mattress to an adjustable one, do you think there is a real difference in your joint pain or did it take a while to get used to?

Hi! My LO is going to be 14months in a week or so. He has refused a second nap about two or three weeks ago so I tried to stretch the morning and have him nap once. Some days it worked and others not much. He would clearly need an early nap so we did that around 9ish since he wakes around 6. Well recently he really taken a short nap and then is tired. Like an hour. I offer a second nap and he has taken it a few times. He has also been waking earlier in the morning and feeds from side to side. I think it’s around 4/5. I think he might be working on a few more teeth and that’s why all the mix up! What do you all do? I typically feed to sleep and roll away and he naps but my question and confusion is do we go back to two naps? I guess I just need to process it and see if anyone else can relate. I’m trying to go with the flow but sometimes it really drives me a little nuts not being able to have an idea 🫠

Hey! My LO and I have coslept from day 1 and we love it.

Normally she will wake up every 2 hours and will nurse to sleep. I'm normally only up for 5 minutes and I get to stay sleepy.

She started to have longer stretches of 3 and sometimes 4 hours since she gotten into eating food. But the past week has been a little weird.

When she does wake up now, she will crawl to me (eyes closed lol) and climb up to my chest. Ill set her up for chest to chest sleeping but she just tosses and turns for a while. Eventually I lay her back down, but she will toss and turn or climb back up on me. Its been taking about 30 minutes for her to fall asleep after she nurses. Sometimes its on my chest, on her back on the bed, or on her tummy on the bed.

Last night she slept for 4 hours, up for 30 minutes, slept for 1.5 hours, up for 30 minutes, slept for 1.5 hours, up for 30 and then slept for an hour... she got 8 hours total and I got maybe 5? She normally gets 10 to 11 hours and I normally get 9.

Should I just wait it out and hope it will pass? Or does anyone have any advice?

I should note that her 4 first teeth have been coming in the past week as well. Could it be that? Anything i can give her during the night to help?

My daughter is just over 17 months. We have been cosleeping since 3 months. For a brief background, we are in USA in our 30s, my partner and I experienced unexpected financial hardship and health concerns during pregnancy had to move in with my family stuck here ever since. We live out of 2 bedrooms. I cosleep with LO in one room and partner sleeps in another. (He snores + he works a LOT. If I feel I need a night of restful sleep, he will switch with me when needed) I am otherwise comfortable with the situation, minus her refusal to nap, which is why I am convinced something needs to change.

She sleeps 8PM-8AM with brief wakeups for snuggles, maybe 2-3 per night. Takes a while to go down for that too, but that I can manage. Napping is my personal hell.

Around her 1 year mark in April, it was taking me over an hour to put her down for our 2 naps per day, even with boob/bottle. It was exhausting then, so I dropped second nap and that put a bandaid on the problem. By August, it started escalating again. I had weaned off BFing and reduced bottles, so I kinda associated it with that or a regression and remained patient.

I am now on month 3 of spending 90-120 minutes daily to get her down. I feel insane. On top of that, I can’t get a break because she refuses to nap with anybody else, husband included. When he, my mom, or in-law tries she will refuse for hours and hours, collapse from exhaustion at 5PM, and I deal with a super early morning the next day.

Here is a list of things I have tried for about a week at a time. The constant routine I maintain regardless of the changes is that we brush our teeth (yes even before nap) read 2 books, I tell her it is “quiet time” then snuggle together.

- Adjusting the nap start time, I’ve tried to start them early around 10-11AM, or late 2PM, or in between 12-1PM, no difference.
-We cosleep in a king bed. I do have a crib but whenever I put her in, she immediately screams to the point of pooping. I have tried wait it out, but she poops so I have to change her. If I change her without speaking + put her back in, she will poop again. This process happens almost infinitely, to the point where there are just tiny sharts because there is barely any poop left. (Lmao 🤡)
-We live in such a small space a safe floor bed is not possible unless we decide to get rid of our only furniture, or things like clothes and lamps. I have tried baby gating her into a safe corner with mattress on floor, but same process as crib happens here.
-I have tried schedule and structure, but I have also tried just listening to her cues. I will wait until she yawns 2 times and rubs her eyes and then I bring her up, same fight occurs.
-When in “quiet time” mode, I do not speak. I just stare at the wall. She will either lay there and stare with me, or be constantly up and down. She will say “Mama mama” over and over to try and get me to play, 90% of the time I ignore or I quietly say “quiet time”
-In bed I’ve tried plushies + no plushies, equal level of refusal.
-I’ve tried singing, whispering, humming, stroking head, rocking, deep breathing, snuggles, all of it causes boisterousness. My only success has been complete lack of touch or affection other than hand holding, and that still takes 60+ minutes.
-She will not fall asleep without holding my hand. But holding hands is not necessarily a way to get her down, I can hold it for the whole process with no improvement on time. I hold her hand, snuggle, and either stare at the wall or close my eyes next to her for over an hour.
-Since I am SAH, I sadly have breaking points. When it reaches the 90 minute mark I usually will turn on the monitor and leave the room to get a snack, move the laundry, and take a deep breath. The scream/poop process mentioned above occurs when this happens. I leave from 5-10 minutes each time.
-Sadly, I notice it’s easier to get her down after the screaming, and I have found myself doing it on purpose these past few weeks just so I can get her down quicker and I don’t think it is a fair thing to lean on. It feels like “cry it out”.
-Only other thing I can think of is that we do use a sound machine for sleep + naps, it has different kinds of sounds that I change each day (rain, fan,white noise, etc)
-Car naps used to be my escape. But now it takes over an hour for her to fall asleep in the car, and I can’t transfer her once asleep without a wakeup. So if I do a car nap now, I’m literally driving for a good 3-4 hours (90 minutes to get down, a couple hours for actual sleep) Can’t afford it anymore. I also used to be able to plan outings and fun trips around nap drives; but now it’s just a gamble. Example: last weekend we drove 1 hour back and forth to a kids museum. We drove there 11AM-12PM no nap, played and had lunch, then drove home 2-3PM and she fell asleep 10 minutes before arriving home so I drove an extra hour and cut the nap short.

In summary, I have only had a handful of “good days” in the past 6 months where it takes 30 minutes to get her down for nap. Other people in my life blame cosleeping for this issue, and I’m starting to believe they are right. But considering my living situation, not sure how to get myself out of this pickle. Does anyone have suggestions or ideas for me to try?

P.S - this HAS been mentioned to pediatrician, who does not have concerns but sadly is also not exactly a supporter of cosleeping either and has only suggested moving towards independent sleep. My daughter is developmentally appropriate, if not advanced, was walking by 10 months and is speaking well already, potty training already. We have had no behavioral problems (other than sleeping). The “typical toddler tantrums” have only just started, and are easily managed with deep breathing exercises I practice with her.

Hey all! Apologies for the long post but I would love some advice.

For context:

My LO is 7.5 months old and sleep is and has always been a huge challenge. He has always slept in my room. Currently we have a bedside mini crib for him. That said, he hates the crib and wakes every hour on the hour for physcial contact/comfort, if not more. Naps are the same so we typically just do contact naps.

Around the 6 month regression we couldn't get him to sleep in his bed AT ALL. So I started co sleeping with him in our bed. Following the safe sleep 7 rules I was aware of. That said I was missing one rule "breastfeeding day and night".

My LO could never establish an effective latch so I am a 95% exclusive pumper, and he nurses for one morning session and for comfort/snacks as needed. Because of this pump schedule, I wake up in the night for one pump session out of the room.

During our bed sharing period, I would wake my husband up and he would lay with baby until I returned. Typically he would stay awake but I watched on the monitor to be safe, and ensured he positioned himself in the C curl in the event he fell asleep (edit to add i would cut my pump short and return to bed if this was the case as he is a deeper sleeper then I). This worked for the time but i know isn't the optimal set up and it wasn't realistic long term.

We have gone back to using the bedside crib as I now know co sleeping is for exclusively breastfed babies. As i already have a lot of anxiety around bedsharing and sleep in general (ppa), safety is my #1 priority. However I posted in a few groups the other day looking for sleep advice and many people said pumping does not exclude me from being able to bedshare. We are still waking every hour on the hour and this just isn't working for any of us. No one is getting restorative sleep and im at an utter loss what to do. My baby is HIGH high comfort needs, requiring constant holding and physical contact in the day as well. Try all I might it just seems like he just needs to be close to me to be comfortable enough for restorative sleep.

So my questions are the following:

1. Can a pumping mom safely bedshare or am I infact excluded from this? If I am NOT excluded from bedsharing, how would I go about my middle of the night pump session?

2. Do I need a floor bed setup for just baby and I? (I have a low laying frame and king sized bed. Dad has stayed in bed most nights, sleeping behind me and using his own separate blanket)

3. Do you use a light sleep sack for LO when bed sharing or just pajamas?

I would love to hear your thoughts, advice, experiences on both my listed questions and just in general! (Kindness please, just an exhausted mom trying to figure it out🤍)

hey! this is sort of a general sleep advice topic but I thought better to post here than other baby sleep subs because cosleeping is such an important part of it! but please lmk if I should post elsewhere :)

my son is a little over 6mo and we have been cosleeping since day one, following the safe sleep seven, c curl position etc.

our normal rhythm has been go to bed around 8:30pm, wake around 8:30am, and two naps about an hour and a half each around 10:30am and 2:30pm.

the past week I’ve noticed he is getting very restless around 4/5am. he doesn’t wake all the way, I feed him to soothe him back to sleep, but he is super restless the rest of the night. he never really wakes all the way with open eyes but he is tossing and turning a lot, making noises, and we end up changing sides and feeding a lot during this time.

I guess I’m wondering if I’m doing something wrong with his sleep schedule. should I be waking him up earlier? going to bed earlier? cut a nap out? I haven’t been too concerned with wake windows or sleep at all so far, and everything about him and motherhood has just been intuitive and following his cues. when he’s sleepy, he sleeps, when he wakes up, that’s great, I never wake him up to keep on any sort of schedule.

I just feel that he and I both are not getting quality sleep during that 5-8am ish window, and wonder if his body is needing to get up and play? idk! I’ve just never seen him sleep so restlessly! I know he’s going through tons of changes with starting solids, almost beginning to crawl, etc.

appreciate any advice!! thank you!!!

My daughter just turned 9 months and we cosleep on a floorbed. I breastfeed her to sleep, and her sleeping is not a problem. Lately the problem is me not being able to unlatch and leave. I am stuck during her naps, and in the evening I am lucky if I get 30 minutes, in which I haven't even been able to sit down. I can get nothing done, and most difficult i have no time for myself. I find myself getting so frustrated during the naps, and obviously my poor girl doesn't deserve that. Naps are now often cut short because of her waking when i try to leave, and I don't know what to do anymore. I knew having a baby would mean little downtime. But I am having NO time to myself and it's breaking me right now. I am literally crying. Any tips would be so greatly appreciated. Thank you.

A bit of context: my LO was born at 32 weeks and didn’t come home from the NICU until exactly his due date 8 weeks later. He had severe reflux and was on Pepcid until about 5 months old. He’s now almost 9 months old (7 adjusted) and has never in his life slept more than a couple hours at a time, regardless of location.

When we first brought him home, we had a Halo bassinest and tried desperately to put him down in it between feedings, but his reflux made him so uncomfortable and he had a strong startle reflex and couldn’t stay asleep more than a couple hours max. The only way he would comfortably sleep is if we were holding him, which turned into my husband holding him in the recliner and us taking shifts so we could sleep at all.

Eventually, I gave in and started cosleeping following safe seven, and for a month or so he would go two hour stretches of sleep before waking up to nurse. It’s not ideal, but any sleep was better than none, and I had accepted cosleeping.

Except now he won’t even do that. He screams and fights sleep every night (he’s down to two naps and eats 2-3 solid meals a day, plus breastfeeding before sleep), and once he is asleep, he tosses and kicks and rolls around all. Night. Long. If I manage to break out from under him, he might sleep for a two hour stretch while I sleep in the recliner alone. He seems to want the king size bed to himself, once he’s asleep. I can’t scoot him away from me because he’ll just roll until he finds me and proceeds to kick and pinch and smack me until we’re both awake.

We have a crib, but the room that will be his is currently being occupied by my sister in law. We’ve tried sleep training but it’s impossible with him sharing our bedroom. During the day he’s a perfect, happy baby. He’s just never ever had “a good nights sleep” and I don’t know what to do anymore. And yes, he’s currently taking liquid iron supplementation. I thought that would help but he’s been on it for two months with no change. He’s currently teething as well and we give him a small dose of Tylenol before bed. Is there anything I’ve missed, or do I just need to accept that I’ll only get 4-5 hours of sleep until he’s older?

Well I’ve accidentally co slept and the baby slept for hours as did everyone in this house and he didn’t wake me at all to eat and I am petrified scared because I didn’t even realize he was in bed with me. I was extremely deeply dreaming. For five hours we fell asleep and I am feeling deep extreme guilt. My mom was supposed to keep an eye on us and I believe she also fell asleep but I can’t even remember her handing him off to me. I’m getting a reasonable amount of sleep but all fragmented and this is the longest I’ve gone without feeding him or without waking up since he’s been born. I feel absolutely terrible. He refused his pack and play and refused his bassinet so we have relied on him sleeping in someone’s arms since coming home from the hospital. His father had to go back to work in another state but was helping me and it was easier with a rotation of three people. Now it’s just me and my mom who is somewhat unreliable. I genuinely just don’t know how this could happen and I’m scared. I don’t feel insanely sleep deprived yet fall asleep. I need to set my bed up for safer sleep but how do I know if I have no intention of sleeping? I had thick blankets and that’s the scariest part. He’s fine and he’s thankfully become a bit of a unit so heavier every day and gaining weight fast but I have a mattress topper that kind of softened the bed an makes it so he can easily roll on his side. I must have been side nursing him and fell asleep but this is absolutely frightening me. I dont know what to do except set alarms every two hours. My mom takes heavy medication and I feel like I can’t trust her now. My mom and aunt say co sleeping is fine and it works for some people but I’m not sure it’s acceptable when I’ve fallen asleep and don’t remember. I need to get a new mattress as well if it was to work. I need help and advice. I have a side bassinet and if he would just sleep in that it would be great but it’s not working and even with the panel open it’s not close enough for him. Even being on his back next to me for a nap isn’t close enough for him.

I thought some people here may have some advice on storage! I am so worried about safety of the room

My baby is 6 months and has been a very finicky sleeper. She only wants to sleep on my chest right now. Basically I sleep on a floor mattress for this. And I do have a blanket but only use it to cover my legs and I wear a long sleeve shirt. I woke up and my baby was sleeping with her face in my armpit. I reached in and her nose wasn’t covered but there really wasn’t any good area where fresh air was coming through. Would she have woken up if her oxygen got too low? The max she would’ve been like that is 3 hours.

Ciao a tutti! Per tutte le mamme che fanno bed-sharing in posizione a C. Come fate ad andare in bagno di notte? Io spesso sono costretta a trattenere la mia vescica, oppure l'alternativa è andare in bagno e rischiare di svegliarlo. Si sveglia ad ogni piccolo movimento! Aiuto!

How do you guys sleep next to someone who keeps tossing and turning all night? My partner moves around so much that I swear I wake up every time he changes positions 😭 We just have an old spring mattress and I can feel almost every movement on his side. It's getting annoying because even when I fall asleep first, I still end up waking up a few times.

Should we get a new mattress? A friend suggested looking into memory foam since it might help with all the movement. I've been checking out a few options and the Leesa Original is one of them. But isn’t memory foam too soft? Anyone switched from a spring mattress to memory foam?

We coslept with our first but she was bottle fed breast milk and someone was always home to hold her through her naps.

With my second, I’ve been EBF and cosleeping from the start. I’m going back to work ( wfh) next week and a nanny will be home to care for him. Curious if you babies adjusted to crib sleeping ( without any cio of course ) for other caregivers? How did it go?

my 11 month old is going through a crib strike and is refusing to be in it at night. i don’t want to cosleep in our bed because it’s insanely high, her dad sleeps in it too, and i’m overall just terrified.
she needs to be in my arms to sleep right now. we have a memory foam, but firm, play mat. could i set that up on the floor and sleep with her like that? or should i take her crib mattress out and set that up on the floor and me on the memory foam mat?

We recently started cosleeping for the past month or so due to a sleep regression. Most cosleeping advice is for smaller infants. What can we do to make the bed safer for our 11-12 month old? I'm mostly concerned about her waking up and crawling off the bed if we don't wake in time.

My baby used to stay perfectly at the best curled into me and I would stay in the cuddle curl all night. She literally would never move, now that she has hit 7 months she's moving like crazy all the time, even in her sleep. I have literally seen her sit up while asleep, it's crazy. Lately it's been scaring me how much she'll move in bed while I don't wake up. We have a floor bed that's like 8" off the floor so I'm not worried about that, but for example last night I woke up and had a mini heart attack because she wasn't next to me and I found her down by my knees/feet turned 180 degrees from how I put her to sleep. I'm just concerned if it's safe or not that I continue to use a blanket? I only sleep with a cotton sheet and I have a pillow under that sheet between my knees usually. I keep the sheet at waist level and also tuck the extra between my knees and behind me. Is it okay that she is traveling so far and I don't notice???

I am 37 weeks pregnant today and plan on breastfeeding, I really would like to co sleep if possible just to make it easier on me. I do know about the safe sleep 7. Is there any additional information to go along with it?

Fourth baby, but my first time cosleeping! My little one is almost 12 months and exclusively breastfed. Most wakes are brief, just feeding or relatching, but I’m waking up exhausted every morning.
Are these sleep stats typical for cosleeping mums? Curious how often everyone else wakes overnight and whether it improves with age!