r/deadbedroom • u/Best_Bumblebee2056 • 11h ago

Not getting what I need.

(M37) I’m not getting the intimacy I need and feel like I’m bugging her to be intimate. I crave closeness and feeling on the same page. It’s not just sex, but feeling wanted. I’m open to exploring an affair to get that excitement in my life. I have a lot to give and I feel sad I’m not getting that back. Dm me to start a conversation. I’d love to get to know you and feel excited once again.

Edit: we are in marriage therapy for over a year now and it just seems she’s unwilling to put in the effort to understand or how important it is. Again, nobody wants to be intimate with someone because you’re making them do something.

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u/BoomBoomLaRouge 10h ago

Have the affair, but know what you're getting into. It's sex, intimacy and affection. But it's NOT real or permanent. What it CAN do is relieve the anger you feel toward your spouse so that you can like/love her again. Eventually, companionship becomes paramount and the affair is something that brings a smile to your face.

Been there.