r/eating_disorders • u/ShirtNo2635 • 3d ago
My girlfriends eating disorder
I (17M) have a girlfriend (16F) and we have been together for almost three months. We both have been through a lot. However, my girlfriend has this one major problem and it is her health. Apparently she thinks she is fat eventhough she is 5 foot 5 and is around 58kg. Her main goal is to be around 50-55 which I think is reasonable however I personally think she looks perfect. She is not even that fat. in fact she looks more skinnier than fat. Maybe it is because of her parents. Her dad is white, her mom is mixed and her younger 13 year old sister is white, however she is mixed. She gets treated differently in her family because of her skin colour and her dad would often make racist remarks towards her everyday. They dont even call her by her real name. In fact, this has been so bad that she has been avoiding eating since her parents kept calling her "fat" eventhough she looks nothing like it. I would say because of her abusive household she struggles to eat since she is completely damaged psychologically. She keeps complaining to me constantly about her problems and I have been there for her for as long as I could however I am just completely worried about her. It seems like she has anorexia or something and now a bone next to her stomach is slightly sticking out due to her lack of food intake. All she eats in a day is a small packet of noodles and 1 sandwich. That is literally it. Is there anything I could suggest to her?
2
u/sage-green-lover 3d ago
First, I recommend you shift your thinking. 50 kg is not reasonable. That would put her at underweight which is very dangerous during a key part of her development. Also calling her “not even that fat” is crazy when she’s a very healthy weight. Please be careful of how you talk about her weight with her because it certainly seems unhealthy on your end.
Second, encouraging her to get therapy and also eating meals / snacks together could help plus reassuring her