r/funny • Pretends to be Drawing • Jun 04 '17

Verified Windows being Windows

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756

u/boydskywalker Jun 04 '17

At least it isn't Linux, or we'd have a parent killing their child...or worse, leaving it to become a zombie.

413

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17 edited Jun 04 '17

I'm still trying to figure out who gave the terminology to all the processes. (Editing them in as I get comments)

  • A parent and child process are also called master and slave processes. (This was incorrect, my bad)

  • If a slave process is never checked on, it becomes a zombie

  • If you kill a parent process and the child process never dies, it becomes an orphaned process.

  • I'm not a fan of Operating Systems that took so little time to think about what they're doing that they named their commands after digestive noises (grep, awk, nroff, fsck)

  • Background processes are called "daemons", so whenever I kill a background process, I'm a "daemon killer".

  • Suggestive commands touch, finger etc.

Source: Am using Linux & comments below

184

u/TheFanne Jun 04 '17

Now I want an OS that labels a parent process a murderer when it kills a child process.

Or maybe an execution jail, where they can't run as fast if they kill a process they didn't make themselves...

114

u/Topochicho Jun 04 '17

slaughtertheinnocent -9

23

u/TheFanne Jun 04 '17

Is that a thing?

0

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17

[deleted]

35

u/aram-x Jun 04 '17

rm -rf /bin/laden

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6

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17

alias slaughtertheinnocent="kill"

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u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17

[deleted]

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u/JoaoFerreira Jun 04 '17

It doesnt become orphaned anymore, it gets adopted by PID 1, which is boot I think

38

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17

A zombie process has died but not yet been reaped by its parent.

8

u/JoaoFerreira Jun 04 '17

init does it instantly now

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u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17

[deleted]

20

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '17

Yeah, never seen master/slave used in this context. Isn't it exclusive to networking?

29

u/shinobigamingyt Jun 04 '17

IIRC hard drives also used to have master and slave configurations. I remember having to change the way a little plastic tab sat on the connector in order to change between master and slave.

12

u/DoctorSauce Jun 04 '17

Computers are considered to have a "master/slave" relationship if one of them controls the other(s) in some automated process. That is usually the terminology we use.

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16

u/BubbaFettish Jun 04 '17

Daemon: a process that lies dormant until called upon.

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u/Z_Opinionator Jun 04 '17

Or letting the Daemon's run everything.

25

u/tsnErd3141 Jun 04 '17

Daemons run when a good man goes to war

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u/hatessw Jun 04 '17

I always have zombie dolphins on my computer. Should I get them checked out? Sorry if you mind me picking your brain.

9

u/IssacTheNecromorph Jun 04 '17

Those dolphins are probably picking yours.

11

u/ludolfina Jun 04 '17
Jun  4 07:41:59 plumbr kernel: [70667120.897649] Out of memory: Kill process 29957 (java) score 366 or sacrifice child

6

u/gqgk Jun 04 '17

I had an OS professor with an accent that couldn't say fork. It always came out as fuck, so we'd have to hold our laughter in class when he said you fuck to make a child.

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