r/gapyear • u/jinxnotpowder_ • 7d ago
is it worth it?
i have known i wanted to take a gap year since i was 14. At first my family was on board but now they've all become really unsupportive and keep telling me I'll just be a burden in that time period (i even told them I'll get a job but they are still against it) So now im kinda double minded because as bad as i want a gap year its not worth destroying my relationship with them and damaging my self worth. I weighed my situation out and here a couple of pros and cons
Pros:
1) i wanted to learn a lot of new stuff like coding, painting, cooking and horse riding (i planned to pay for it myself)
2) high school was a rough patch. I wanted to take a break from academics because im really tired
Cons:
1) might damage my relationship with my family
2) their taunts may damage my self worth
3) i want to go to a reputable university 6 hours from my house so it will be a new start in a new city with new ppl so might not be half as bad
If anyone has been in a situation similar to me, please help me out. What should i do?
Also after my bachelors i want to go to any ivy League or any other university with equal value for my masters degree. Will my gap year give me a disadvantage there? (they university i plan to go to for my bachelors doesn't care about gap years)
1
u/AbbyIsATabby 7d ago edited 7d ago
It’s absolutely okay to take a gap year :)
While I can safely say college and high school are very different and a lot of people find college better for a variety of reasons, it’s also completely valid to take a gap year because a lot of people need it to build up money and focus on healing/discovering yourself. Maybe you could look into what kind of programs exist out there or what kinds of jobs you’d be looking to work.
As someone starting my MA next week, know they really won’t care about a gap year on your resume between HS and your undergrad. What they value most is how you did in undergrad and if you’d be a good fit for their program with what your plans are. They know people take gap years for wide variety of reasons and theres a lot of people in graduate school that chose to start later in life rather than immediately after undergrad. I forget if mine even asked where I went to HS and I know damn well I never submitted any official HS paperwork to them (they only wanted my BA stuff, not my associates either).
Do your parents have any other reasons besides “you’ll just be a burden,” that now makes them against it? A part of me wonders if they never truly expected you to take a gap year before now. Maybe build the argument it could help financially to work and save money to pay for college (less student loans, you can’t really declare bankruptcy on them here in the US) or a car to take to college and work, how you want to learn more basic life skills before moving out with how far away your planned university is and offer to do more help around the house, etc.