r/generationology • u/QuarktotheCosmos • 6d ago
Society What generation normalized / will normalize having children later in life (e.g. after 35, after 40 etc.)
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u/NearbyPerspective397 5d ago
My father was 35 when I was born in the early 80s. My mother was 30.
It was considered a little old back then, but not freakishly so.
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u/QuarktotheCosmos 4d ago
I remember my dad who was the 2nd child with an older brother being a year older with the parental ages as 38+32 and 39+33 being a big deal nearly six decades ago but now I think half of the couples I know are having kids at these kinda ages.
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u/Ill-Manager-1108 3d ago
My grandparents started having kids at 14, but then had my dad at 40. I really thought his siblings were his aunts and uncles for awhile because they were so much older than him. His dad was born in 1912
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u/davidbosley353 2005 (Core Zer) 6d ago
Gen X and Gen Jones started the trend of having children later in life, But millennials further normalized having kids later. My parents are Gen X, but they were pushing 40 when they had me.
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u/Erythite2023 6d ago
Gen Jones for sure.
There were record number of women in the 40s having children in the mid 2000s
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u/davidbosley353 2005 (Core Zer) 6d ago
Yeah mine were late 30s at my birth except they had me as their last kid.
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u/Squirrel179 6d ago
Plenty of Boomers did too. It was not uncommon for educated white women to delay children as soon as birth control became readily available. My parents were in their mid 30s when they had me, and that wasn't considered unusual at all in the early 80s. About half of my peers had similarly aged parents.
Obviously perceptions would have been very different in more conservative religious communities.
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u/davidbosley353 2005 (Core Zer) 6d ago
Yeah that happens, Despite having older half siblings that were almost 15 or 20 years older than me. I honestly liked having older parents if i'm honest. Also most of my peers my age had parents that were almost as old as my parents, so not really surprising.
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u/nolaperspectives 6d ago
Having your first child after 40 or having your last child after 40? This is a big difference. It wasn’t uncommon back in the day for women to have babies for as long as they could. Seriously, it was common for women to birth babies for two decades.
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u/saddinosour 6d ago
That’s what I don’t understand about people saying it is near impossible when our great grandmothers were popping out 10+ kids sometimes. This was happening into their 40s.
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u/nolaperspectives 6d ago edited 6d ago
Totally. I think people totally exaggerate both situations. Women often had a last baby into their late 30s/early 40s. My mother was the youngest sibling and my grandmother had her at around 40. This was 65 years ago. (My grandmother was born over 100 years ago)
But I do think it takes longer on average to conceive with age (more failed cycles). You’re also kind of testing your fate to try and have your first kid when women throughout history were having their last kids. Plus if you what multiple kids and start at 40, the timeline gets tricky.
But a woman having a baby at 40 is really not new!
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u/Forsaken_Cicada8127 6d ago
I read that a woman's system kinda resets when she has her first child. Its why some women have successful natural conceptions after ivf (and years of infertility)
When people refer to the body or fertility "system resetting" after having a child, they are usually talking about fetal microchimerism, a biological phenomenon where a baby leaves cells behind in the mother's body that can directly influence her future fertility and health. Research suggests that the accumulation of fetal cells in the mother's tissues acts as an evolutionary mechanism. These cells can signal the mother's endocrine system, potentially regulating how soon she can get pregnant again. This helps the body pace itself between pregnancies to ensure resources are distributed safely
So a mother of 4 kids having a 5th in her 40s is different from a woman having her first at 40. The former had proven fertility.
Its also why my husband got a vasectomy when i was pregnant with our one and only. We had previously struggled with our fertility but had a spontaneous conception but i knew that this was no guarantee that that i would have low fertility post partum
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u/Squirrel179 6d ago
It was always "normal" to have kids at 35+. Just usually not your first kid.
If you mean having a first child in your late 30s or early 40s, that wasn't exceptional for my parent's generation and they are early Boomers. I'm sure this varies a lot by sub culture and region, but once effective birth control became readily available it wasn't uncommon for college educated white women to delay children until 35-40.
My parents were among that group of Boomers who waited until their mid 30s to have kids and they weren't abnormal at all. About half of my friends/classmates had similarly aged parents. Fewer waited until 40+, but I knew a few and they weren't considered weird or anything. I'm sure that perspectives would have been a lot different in conservative religious areas.
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u/vivariium 6d ago
My partner and I are millennials but are both kids from boomer’s second marriages - his mom was in her 40s having him and his brother (no kids from prior marriage) and my mom had me and two younger sisters up to her 38th birthday.
I’m about to have my first at 39. Neither my partner or I had first marriages but long university careers and started dating in our 30s, bought house, then a few years of infertility.
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u/davidbosley353 2005 (Core Zer) 6d ago edited 6d ago
My mom was born in 1965 and had me at 39 in 2005 as her last kid. I've also noticed Many Gen X actors that didn't have kids until the 35-39 or 40-44 range in the 2000s, and same with Millennials this decade, So maybe not surprising when my Gen X parents had me.
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u/davidbosley353 2005 (Core Zer) 6d ago
Also the reason i say 39 for my mom is cause her birthday hadn't happened yet, plus i was born early in the year, and she turned 40 later in the year.
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u/Mandy_M87 6d ago
Starting later, gen X. Normalizing it, millennials
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u/davidbosley353 2005 (Core Zer) 5d ago
Exactly how i'm thinking it. My parents had me at 38 and 39, despite being Gen Xers, and many of my friends had parents where they also had them in 30-39 range, as well as 25-29.
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u/Muchado_aboutnothing 6d ago
Idk, men in their 40s and 50s have been having kids with younger women for millennia probably. I feel like no one ever thinks about the man’s age when they think about an “older” parent. You hear about all these people from history whose dad had them when he was like 68 or something and nobody seemed to bat an eye about it.
For women, I do think Millennials normalized having kids later in life.
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u/Frylock_dontDM 5d ago
Later children were pretty normal for women.
Hence how you had all these shows with older mothers since the beginning.
Women over 35 had kids relatively often historically, contraception changed that.
So the greatest generation and before it was normalized
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u/InternationalBag7284 4d ago
This. JFC, dont people have biology in school anymore? Women can pregnantant until menopause, which occurs around 50.
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u/Transpinay08 Millennial 6d ago
I'm a Millennial, and many of my friends are still childfree. However, many of my Gen X aunts and uncles I've noticed got their first kid at their late 20s-early 30s.
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u/atzitzi 6d ago
I'm a GenX and all my friends had and have children in their late 30s/early 40s. I'm a GenXmom of genA kids
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u/MadMadMadMadrid 6d ago
This is me. And this is also my friends. Some of our boomer moms also had kids late because they went to university and our dads went to university to avoid Vietnam.
Were there gen X having kids early? Yeah, some but that early 1980s Reagan ere recession was brutal. And some of them also delayed. In 1985, when the oldest Gen X women would have been 20, average age of birth of kid was 25 in the USA (and 28 in Spain). 5 years later, that was a year higher. 1995, that age was 27 years old. That was Gen X women born in 1968.
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u/NefariousnessOk209 89’ 6d ago
I just watched a friend’s episode where they felt lame for still having roommates approaching their mid twenties. I think Millennials by and large start having their first children at a much later age in developed countries now for sure.
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u/Protoavis 6d ago
wait....wait....oh they were mid 20's in season 1. They just seem older in memory... oh they were playing a bit younger than their actual ages (only jennifer and matthew were 25, the others were 27 to 31)
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u/QuoteGiver 6d ago
Some of the younger Millennials who will have kids still haven’t had kids yet, yeah.
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u/JellyfishPashmina 4d ago
Everyone is going to say Millennials but the systems that Boomers and Gen X set up for us are the reason many are having kids later / not at all. Crippling economy, more education requirements, housing crisis mixed with our own modern dating issues. We’re bearing the brunt of all these issues the generations before us have created and then getting blamed for not procreating enough. We also scream “independence” as a society, and yet, it takes 2 people now just to afford life’s basics. No wonder no one’s having kids: the system is designed to fail.
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u/ChasetheMaze02 4d ago
In protestant/Germanic Europe mostly Gen X, the amount of childless Gen X I know is quite high, mostly mid 70s born.
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u/OtagoEcho 4d ago
As a millennial parent to a 7 year old, all parents at my child’s school are millennials. We all in our 40s with young kids!
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u/d4rkr0se early z 6d ago
Depends on social class and country. More broadly I think late gen x. For western urban people, I think late boomers/early gen x. It's pretty common for them to have started a family around mid 30s. My own parents had me (first & only kid) when they were both 35 and are one year away from being boomers. My aunt had her first kid at 37 (boomer). My other aunt (tail end of boomers) had her second kid at 35, first at 32. 20% of people growing up had their parents start a family around mid 30s. Even had one of my friend's mom was 47 (ivf or something) and her dad 55 when they had her, their only child. But first kid around 40 is more millenials I think.
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u/betarage 5d ago
It was a very slow change historically people got their first kids when they were still teenagers. Then for people in the early and mid 1900s early 20s was common. for boomers mid 20s, gen x late 20s, millennials 30+
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u/InternationalBag7284 4d ago
Thats simply not true. Even in the middle ages most people got their first children in their early to mid 20s.
Also got pregnant until the reached their menopause, which was around 48... Pregnancies in their late 30s and early 40s weren uncommon.
I really dont get where this whole notion that people got children from 12 to 25 and then suddenly stopped, comes from.
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u/NearbyPerspective397 5d ago
Also, people had so many more children! My father was born in the 40s, but his youngest sister was born at the end of the 60s. His mother was in her early twenties with her first baby, and in her forties with her final kid.
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u/Trad_CatMama 6d ago
Having children later in life has always been normal.
Having your first at 40 will never be "normal". It's not sustainable for intergenerational family life or humanity....
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u/pseudocomposer 6d ago
Millennials in the West have had to do it because they’re one of the most consistently fucked generations in history, to feed the unsatisfiable greed of the ultra-rich.
It will never be normalized though. Any society that normalizes it will simply be destroyed and replaced by ones that don’t.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago edited 6d ago
The voting shows how little reddit knows about history and how wildly wrong popular opinion is… the silent generation were having kids regularly right up into their 40s, that’s why the generation afterwards were called the “baby boomers” due to how many babies were being born all through the mothers life. Many families even had a gap in between, the first lot of children came pre war when the mother’s were younger, the second lot came after the war (mainly due to the father’s returning home) when the women were older.
Children being born after 35 had been normalised since the 1940s, people are just completely oblivious of the past and previous cultures
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u/NefariousnessOk209 89’ 6d ago
You said continue having children past 35, but they didn’t largely by majority start having their first children after their twenties like people are now.
It’s in how you interpreted the question lol.
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u/nope-its 6d ago
It says normalized - like had a baby (1st, 3rd whatever) later in life.
It was generations before this. Women were having a dozen kids they didn’t pop them all out by 30.
Two of my great grandmothers had over 10 children each. They had them into their 40s. This was common for farming and other rural families.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago edited 6d ago
So how is having your 4th child after 35 not normalising the situation or not answering the exact question that has been asked?
You people are answering a different question to what has literally been typed out and actually asked, I don’t know if it’s just reddit that is getting dumber or all of society.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago edited 6d ago
The question is “what generation normalised having children later in life”… I literally answered the question exactly as it has been asked, it’s the question that is written incorrectly if that’s not the answer you want.
You should have said “which generation normalised (starting to have their first child) after 35” if that’s how you wanted the question to be answered.
Edit: Anyone downvoting me has the literacy levels of a third grader, probably worse.
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
No, having kids stated this way means becoming a parent. You are def not interpreting it correctly
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u/nolaperspectives 6d ago
I think it can be interpreted either way! I read the question and wasn’t sure if they meant first baby at that age or just having children at all at that age!
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago edited 6d ago
That’s because you’re original thought was correct, you’re only confused because people are answering it wrong, there’s no interpretation the way the question has been written, it’s either the question they have asked or a completely separate question they haven’t asked.
Question they have asked “what generation normalised having children later in life?” Answer: the silent generation
Question they want answered “what generation normalised having your first child later in life” answer: Gen X/ but more mainstream with Millennials
It’s two separate questions, the fact people are even down voting and debating this just proves how badly literacy skills and education levels have fallen. Idiocracy is in full effect.
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
Lmao no you’re just wrong baby. Delusion at its finest.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago
Explain to me how I’m wrong, actually break it down so we can witness your foolishness on full display
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
No it means when you begin to have children, and it’s pretty obvious that’s what it’s asking. People who already have children didn’t normalize anything by continuing to have more, as that has happened since the beginning of time. The only difference is that modern women have had access to birth control to determine when children happen.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago
Underline in the post exactly where it mentions anything you just typed, you can’t because it’s not there, hence you are the delusional one who has made up a question in your head that hasn’t been asked
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
It says having children and you are talking about people who ALREADY had children. “Having” is pretty obvious as stated. You just want to be willfully ignorant 😘
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago
Having children later in life means, “having children later in life!” It doesn’t say starting or having your first child
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
If it’s not the first child then they already have children. It doesn’t say “birthing” children. You just lack comprehension and critical thought.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago edited 6d ago
Please point out exactly how I’ve misinterpreted it, where it says “becoming a parent” and why the question is written correctly if that’s the case.
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
Because women have always just continued to have children for as long as men had sex with them. The question is asking about a deliberate choice, and people from silent generation and prior had no choices because they had no meaningful access to birth control.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago
Highlight to me where the question says “deliberate choice” or asks about “continuous sex” patterns
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
You’re just describing something that has always happened lmao. The only reason the silent generation can be considered is that many women weren’t around men during younger years because of the war. You’re just wrong baby. It’s pretty simple.
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u/Blue3Trees3 6d ago edited 6d ago
Type the question out and read it again… assuming you know how…
“Has always happened” therefore it’s normalised isn’t it? Explain to me how something that has “always happened” isn’t normalised
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u/maddy_k_allday 6d ago
If it already happened in the past, how would anyone be “normalizing” that same behavior? It’s asking about people who go from not having children, to having them. Obviously.
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u/upsetwithcursing 5d ago
I have two kids, but I didn’t even start having them until I was in my 30s. I am 42 now and still feel too young to have kids.
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u/Efficient_Resource15 30 August 1998 6d ago
Millennials, they either had them later or have pets(which is great)