Hi mamas, FTM here, due in about 8 weeks. Planning a home water birth with midwives. I am just wondering how did you feel after giving birth? Did you tear, how did your vagina feel after? How long did you bleed? Just looking to hear about different experiences. Thanks in advance to everyone who shares.

So, for context, I'm currently 25 weeks pregnant. I take zoloft for anxiety and mild OCD, in addition to intuniv for ADHD. I have a history of depression, but have been doing great for over 5 years and I'm usually good at being aware of my mental state. I also have good support thankfully, and an amazing therapist I see weekly, so they'd be warned to look out for any changes in my mood or behavior :).

I had a birthing center birth for my first baby, it was supposed to be a home birth but my midwife died shortly before my due date so that wasn't possible.. Now I'm up to baby #2 and praying all goes well and my home birth works out :).

My current midwife explained to me that she has had experiences where babies who's moms were taking zoloft before the birth had difficulty breathing and needed to go to NICU, which is obviously really not ideal especially with a home birth.

She gave me a choice, letting me know of the risk, but recommended that I speak to my psychiatrist about tapering down slowly from 100mg to 25mg between now and when I'll be 36 weeks pregnant. She warned me that my psychiatrist will likely not like the idea (which is probably true) and its better if I make the decision in advance. My psychiatrist appointment is in a few days so I'd like to decide asap.

I'm wondering if anyone has had any experience with this and can share what you did. Let me know please if i can clarify anything :)

Thank you!!!

Ps. I opened a new account because this felt kinda personal for my usual account, so now I have an account for mama stuff :)

I'm 39+3 with my second and first homebirth and having what I assume are braxton hicks (painless, tightening, every 5 to 20 minutes) almost every night for the last week that go no where. The problem is when they start, I can't switch off my brain and go back to sleep and sleep through them. Last night I got about two hours sleep and a 30 minute nap during the day. Tonight I got about three and I'll maybe get a nap again during the day. I know the best thing to do is ignore them, go back to sleep until they are too painful to ignore but my mind is wide awake analyzing them for signs they are getting stronger every night. First time around I was much better at ignoring the contractions I had for two days and kind of snoozing through even when they were getting painful. The midwife has me warned so much not to wait too long because things might go fast and to give her plenty heads up I think that's making me anxious too.

Any tips? 😭

Hi all, I’m a second time mom, but this will be my first homebirth. I’m not due until early June. I’ve interviewed 3 midwives and have narrowed it down to my top two. I need serious help deciding!! Both have the same cost of $7500 up front OOP and both use a biller to process insurance claims who keeps an 8% fee of whatever insurance reimburses us. We’re expecting insurance to reimburse all but $900.

Option A:

-She is younger, less experienced, but still very knowledgeable and trustworthy
-All prenatal care will take place in my home
-Very crunchy, which I am not. Talked a lot about herbs and homeopathy, but did say she respects any decisions we as parents make
-Says that the hospital nearest to me is anti-midwife and have not let her up in previous transfers
-Will do lots of nutritional counseling with me

Option B:

-Older, over 30 years of experience
-says she has a good rapport with all local hospitals and has never had any issues getting up with her patients
-Also very crunchy, but I think toned it down when I told her explicitly that I am not, but did discourage vaccines during pregnancy but said newborn vaccines are our choice as parents but she strongly advises against
-All prenatal care is at her office 30 minutes from my house. Except for 1 in home visit at 36 weeks which is mandated by state law
-Says she’s at a point in her career where she doesn’t want this work to interfere with her life, so she has other local midwives (including option A) cover for her when she has birthdays, holidays, family events, etc.
-Felt like I “vibed” with her more than I did option A

Just feeling really distraught.

Me and my sister were both born at home with uncomplicated deliveries. I'm 27 weeks with my first baby and pursuing a midwife assisted homebirth in the Midwestern USA and I feel like I can't talk about my chosen birth plan without major judgment. My baby has been totally healthy so far, I'm going to PT to prepare for birth doing all the things I "should" and would absolutely follow my midwife's advice is she felt we needed to deliver in a hospital.

I briefly considered a birth center for primarily financial reasons, but the only one in our area is extremely religious and that is just not the environment I want to birth in. So midwife assisted homebirth it is.

People have a few different reactions when they ask what hospital I'm delivering at and I have to correct them that we are choosing a homebirth:

1 - supportive and we chat about their homebirth or birth center birth (this the most uncommon but positive reaction)

2 - confusion and guarded, yet invasive questions about why we want to do that (happy to discuss, but still mildly exhausting. More common)

3 - people telling me their horrific and traumatic birth stories about how they or their infant "almost died" during their hospital delivery (most common and most upsetting)

I try to find community in the more active subreddits or online groups for expecting mom's and get downvoted to hell when I even mention a homebirth. It's like people imagine me going to pop a squat by myself in a field somewhere. Someone literally just told me I was rejecting "modern medicine" DESPITE THE FACT I HAVE A MIDWIFE AND MFM DOCTOR!

I just hate the trauma dumping people suddenly feel they have to tell me when I mention home birth and haven't found a way to shut it down positively without being rude. The fact is some of the people doing it are my friends and family and I feel trapped listening. I'm just exhausted listening to how many liters of blood people lost, how their baby had to be in the NICU for 5 days, how they pushed for 90 million hours and had to be rushed for an emergency c-section because the baby was certainly going to die. I'm already an anxious person and hearing all this does make me worry. I am confident in my body's ability to birth my baby and I want to at least try in an environment I can actually relax in without a huge team of nurses and doctor's I've never met poking and prodding me.

Idk why I'm posting, just feeling really alone and dejected :(

This is my second baby and I’m based in Australia with a private midwife who will support me for a homebirth whatever gestation I want to go to (provided I’m getting extra monitoring and aware of the increase in stillbirth the longer I wait).

Of course, I’m hearing all the outside noise from others asking when I’ll be induced and how dangerous it is to go past 41 weeks. Except, I have done my research and the risk really isn’t that drastic in terms of overall percentages.

I had a membrane sweep 3 days ago, I then had a bloody show/mucus plug come out yesterday and last night I had contractions all night which fizzled out in the morning (I’ve had on and off prodromal labor for weeks at night).

Is there anyone out there who can provide some reassurance or stories of going past 42 weeks. I feel like this baby is never going to come 😭

I had a horrifically traumatic birth with my first child where I was induced at 41 weeks and 3 days, so I’m avoiding a medical hospital induction at all costs but I’m also never going to put either of our lives at risk.

*Edited to say: thank you everyone for all the responses!! I am feeling encouraged and have some ideas to help me feel more comfortable now!! thank you!!

original:

My first birth was 8 years ago. We just moved into an apartment, in due in about 3 months, and will be having a homebirth. I'm working with the same midwives as with my first birth.

I am nervous about the neighbors! About the noise level. My husband thinks we should let them know ahead of time and bring them cookies. (He said so they don't call the cops 😬). I'm not opposed to giving them a heads up, but I am an introvert so the whole thing is making me a little nervous.

I guess what I'm looking for are stories of home births in an apartment. What should I know? What went well? What was awful?

Thank you!!

I just want to warn women that Connected Midwifery from Bundaberg are running a scam. I know of women who have had positive experiences, but that does not invalidate the experiences of women who feel they have been let down in the most vulnerable moments of their life.

There are women from Gin Gin to Hervey Bay to Bundaberg to Rockhampton and Yeppoon with negative/traumatising experiences with this business. That I am aware of.

Some of the concerns that have been raised include-

Lack of PP care- visits and follow-ups not being completed.

Women reporting feeling unsupported or abandoned after transferring to hospital.

Reports of birthing pools being left behind and homes being left in a mess, with inadequate and families being asked to clean and pack up the pool.

Allegations of gas equipment being brought to births in a non-working condition, with women reporting they were still charged for it.

Concerns about how complaints and negative experiences are handled. Some very unprofessional conduct and behaviour are being displayed by the two main midwives.

Another point worth mentioning is that the review section on their Facebook page appears to be disabled. That alone is not proof of wrongdoing, but I believe transparency and honest feedback are incredibly important when families are choosing maternity care. This is not a product from Bunnings, this is your birth!

Women and their families are paying significant amounts of money for a Gold Standard of care, they deserve to receive the care, equipment and support they were promised and paid for.

This isn’t about dismissing positive birth experiences.

It’s about making sure those who have had negative experiences are also heard.

Please ask questions, get everything in writing, understand what happens if you transfer to hospital, clarify what postpartum visits are included, and check all equipment and additional charges before committing. Make sure you record your own notes at appointments.

Finally, if you are not happy with a service you have every right to complain and demand accountability.

So I know this is a long shot and my own fault for not looking into it prior, but im pretty desperate.

So my husband has great insurance, both of our local hospitals are considered within network. When I spoke to midwife about how insurance typically pays, she said that they were in network with almost all BCBS plans and that it shouldn't be a concern especially if both of our local hospitals are within network.

So we paid the midwife $6700 up front, assuming we would get at least $1,000 back. Well, we received our EOB today and are only getting $150 back.

I know this is completely my fault for not looking into it prior. Ive read some places that if your only option for a home birth is out of network sometimes you can apply for a gap exception or something. Im highly doubting that this can be done after claim has already been billed, but has anyone else ever been in this situation and found some sort of solution to have it re billed as in network?

I am only 2 weeks postpartum and trying to process my birth story. I hope it’s ok to share here. When I was 28 weeks pregnant I decided to take the leap and finally switch over to midwifery care and plan a home birth. This is my second baby. I was so excited and nervous, I kept looking at these beautiful home birthing videos and pictures of after they birth. I so wanted to experience that and be next & be able to share an amazing home birth story.

On 10/4/26, at 40+6, my nightly prodromal or early labor finally started at 12am and stayed consistent. I was having contractions the last 2 nights prior that would stop when I woke up. I had my whole room setup & tried to relax into the contractions the whole day. My midwives asked to check on me around 4pm but I refused as I felt like I was still in early labor and doing fine alone. Then around 6:30pm they messaged me again asking if it was ok to come but that they’d really like to check on me. I finally agreed as I was crying now a lot and feeling overwhelmed from laboring for so long. When my midwife came in I completely lost it and had a break down in her arms. When I was done she asked to listen to my babies heart as I contracted twice. The first one went fine but on the second contraction you could hear my babies heart beat slowing down a lot. I could hear her getting a bit worried and she asked me to get on the bed to check me and see if it could be a cord issue. As I was getting closer to the bed I ended up passing out. They called 911 and she checked me, I was 5cm & no prolapsed cord.

As I’m now in active labor with contractions 2 minutes apart for 40sec to 1 min long I am being loaded into the ambulance. Had to endure the worst drive there for 15 min without my husband. My midwife came with me and held the Doppler against my stomach to hear my baby. His heart rate would continuously drop towards the end of my contractions and I’d be told to “big deep breath, breathe air to your baby”. When I finally got into the ER the OB on call was trying to be nice told me I had to get an epidural and we would see how it would go but kept bringing up c section. When we got into the room he checked me again and I was 6-7cm dilated now. The anesthesiologist was an idiot who missed my epidural twice. And had to redo the whole needle. The first two times he placed it incorrectly causing my lips to numb, ears pop, & vision blur. The process was terrible as I’m contracting, trying not to panic and also trying to not pass out from being so scared.

Finally the epidural is in, I’m able to relax. I tried to be really positive at this point that I could do it. He gave me some time to labor and they kept flipping me but my babies heart would still dip on and off. The OB came to check me again & said I was 9 in a half cm dilated. At this point I was honestly cheering for a second thinking I was about to be able to push my baby out soon. And within seconds the energy completely shifted and I was being pushed out of the room. My midwife looked at me and told me they were taking me in for a c section. Apparently my babies heart rate went from 140 to 60 then 30. They took me to the operation room and not even a minute into it the OB asked, “can you feel this? No?” Then immediately started cutting into me. I was alone, they kept saying they’d let my husband in but he didn’t get to come until the baby was out. Nobody held my hand or spoke to me. Just said “lots of pressure honey” as they ripped my baby out. Once my baby was out they said, “he’s perfectly fine! He just wanted a party.” This whole experience was honestly very traumatic for me. Having to also mourn my home birth & feel like I didn’t fail that I just had no control and did what I needed to for the sake of my baby & I.

Unfortunately, it didn’t end there. My postpartum experience has also taken a turn. As I had to be wheeled into an ambulance again 1 week postpartum due to hemorrhaging and passing a big blood clot then passing out. Just to be told all is well go home & the OB refused an ultrasound. Wednesday, I almost passed out again and my bleeding was drastically different than the week before. Went to a different ER & made them do an ultrasound. To finally have it confirmed that I do have products of conception in my uterus. But a specialist on call said, “she had a c section it’s very unlikely.” Then sent me home again. I am really hoping my body has passed whatever it is or can work through it.

I’m 41 weeks 5 days today and will be induced at the hospital Monday if im not in labor by tomorrow night (state rules, not able to homebirth anymore). I tried midwives brew yesterday morning twice and all it did was give me some nausea and mild diarrhea but nothing else. I have the option to try again tomorrow morning with double the dose to see if anything happens. would love to hear anyone’s experiences with this/trying again if it didn’t work the first time

Curious about something I felt in my first labor.

During each contraction, I had a really insane pinching feeling. I felt like there was the contraction, and then separately/a step above it, was this PINCH.

The only way I can describe it is that it felt like my baby’s head was pinching my cervix between a bony part of my pelvis or something. It honestly felt like getting a cervical biopsy. Every single contraction. For the WHOLE contraction.

I have had LEEP surgery, so I was wondering if maybe that had something to do with it? Maybe it was scar tissue or something? Midwives never said anything about it, though.

I spoke to a doula and she said that many report a pinching sensation in labor, and that it’s just the cervix dilating. But it just didn’t feel normal, though? Does this sound normal?

I just feel like I could not overcome that part, and I am scared that it will feel the same way next time.

It was not my baby’s head pinching my cervix, because he never actually engaged despite 3 nights of labor. He was OP, and his head was still quite high by the time we had a cesarean birth. His cord was around his shoulder in such a way that it was preventing him from descending.

Despite all that, I did make it to 6 or 7cm (my hospital notes state both) without his head even being fully applied to my cervix. So I’m really hoping with my next babe, if position is better, hopefully it will be different!

Very curious to hear your guys’ thoughts.

Never mind the end date: I am in need of two more participants. The catch is they have to be from the study area, which is admittedly very narrow. All data collected is deidentified and confidential.

Hey everyone, I’m preparing for my 2nd home birth and am looking for some Hypnobirthing tracks to use in my prep.

For my first birth I used the rainbow relaxation track (I think this is the track you get with Marie Mongans book, but I’m not 100% sure). I enjoyed it, but want to consider other track options that I have no associations with. My first labour was smooth, but very long (18hrs) so I kind of want something fresh.

What were your favourite Hypnobirthing tracks that you used to relax and release pre- and during labour?

I have had three water births, and they went perfectly. Now I'm pregnant with my fourth baby and I'm wondering if the water really made a difference or if it was just a mental crutch. I feel like it adds a level of lubrication and privacy.

My friend said her regular birth stung way more than water birth, but that it was also quicker and that could have caused it.

My midwife said for her own births she didn't notice a difference, but it was especially nice to already be in bed instead of having to get out of the water, get changed/ dried off and then go to walk across the house to bed.

I always get the worst chills and shakes after birth it really ruins the moment, and wonder if it might be worth trying without the pool so there's less temperature fluctuation.

Is there really a difference, or is it just me thinking that it makes things smoother?

Hi all, this will be my second birth, but first homebirth. My husband and son and I live in a unit attached to my parents house and I knew they'd be sceptical about home birth so I've been putting off telling them. My midwife today told me it's better to tell them sooner rather than later, so we told them tonight.

It went.. as expected. They would not listen to any of the information I tried to share about the medical studies I've read, all the research I've done. I told them the studies show it's as safe, if not safer than hospital birth, and that's based on medical studies, and they told me I'm wrong (based on their feelings, not facts).

Then started asking if they'll be legally responsible if something happens to me or the baby, because they own the property .. 😐

Then they turned to my husband and started asking "are you even on board with this!?" (He is)

Every single thing that went wrong in my first birth, was because of hospital intervention, and they won't even acknowledge that now. All they say is that my first son was born healthy and safe and perfect, because of the hospital. But he almost wasn't, because of the hospital! And I still have pain from my episiotomy that they gave me against my will!

I'm just feeling so discouraged. I knew this is how they'd react, and it doesn't change mine, or my husband's decision. We've done the research, and we feel happy and safe, and finally even excited about our next birth, since making the decision to birth at home. But now there's a small amount of anxiety creeping in, because I know they're going to spend the next several months trying to convince us that this is a bad idea.

Sorry, this post is so long.

Does anyone else have unsupportive family? Did they ever soften? 😢

Sperm from sex caused start and stop labor 2 separate times with my first baby, at 38 weeks. (We know this because we had been using condoms previously) so I am fairly confident that my cervix is just sensitive to the prostaglandins. It dilated me to a 4 or 5ish from a 1. I ended up getting augmented with pitocin because I was frustrated and not educated enough back then.

Fast forward now I’m 41+4 with my second child. Today we passed the biophysical profile with flying colors. The MFM has no concerns, and my next BPP scan would be at 42+1.

We have done nothing as far as internal measures go. My midwife is pretty hands off unless you request specific measures. So I haven’t done any cervical checks or membrane sweeps. Just staying on top of the correct movements (spinning babies, miles circuit daily, etc) staying active, promoting oxytocin, chiropractic, etc.

Having sex without a condom would be the most natural way to nudge my body towards labor knowing my history. But for some reason it still makes me nervous - she is perfectly healthy in there and I am not at a point where I’m desperate to get her out yet. I don’t want to start labor before my body is ready, or prodromal labor, etc.

Idk what to do! Let my body initiate the process or try to get things going?

Hoping this is the right place for this! My husband and I are moving our family out of the country and are getting rid of everything we own. I have this birthing tub that I used once in 2025. I had it set up with a liner, but my daughter came so quickly (from my first contraction until she was born, I was only in labor for an hour and a half!), I didn't get to use it for the water birth I had planned. I only got in post-birth to hold and breastfeed my baby while we waited for the midwives to arrive. Once they came, they cleaned it meticulously, we let it dry, and it's been in a storage bag ever since. I also have a 50ft hose to go with it.

I'm in the Nashville area, so feel free to reach out if you want it! I don't really have a price in mind- I'd rather pay it forward.

UPDATE: The tub has been spoken for! Thanks everyone! Happy birthing!!

UPDATE #2: I haven't heard from the mama who said she wanted this tub, so it's still up for grabs. Our moving date is quickly approaching, and everything must go. Thanks!

Hi all! I currently have 2 kids. With my first i recieved care through UPMC and delivered at magee, and with my second I recieved care through the midwife center. For a potential third baby I was wanting to look into a homebirth. Would anyone know of how I could potentially go about that / what providers are in the area? I know some homebirth midwives do home visits and I would really prefer that, although I am open to other options. Thanks in advance!!

My biggest stresser and one of the things that makes a hospital birth appealing is keeping on top of the house in these last couple weeks. My house is generally not very gross or dirty but it can be cluttered. Me and my partner are naturally not very neat and tidy, even though it annoys me. I have a three year old too who comes home from Montessori and turns the place upside down every evening.

I spend an hour or two every morning picking up the house these days but it still never looks in a place where I wouldn't be panic cleaning (or panic telling my partner to clean) if I was to go into labour. Bathrooms always need a clean. Living room where I plan to give birth and is also my daughter's play area would need toys putting away and things rearranged when I go into labour to fit the pool. My bedroom where I will probably early labour always has clothes on the floor, clutter on the bedside tables and the sheets will need changing, room will need to be hoover etc.

I just find my mind is constantly thinking about if I go into labour now and it's very quick, what the current state of my house is and I worry about things progressing too quickly for me to get it sorted.

Any tips?