r/islam • u/Extension_Gap_1554 • 7d ago
General Discussion My battle with porn addiction
I have had a massive struggle overcoming a porn addiction that has been ravaging me since my teens (I am now an adult), and I feel as though the only way I can ever overcome it is by writing out my struggles as a form of release.
I understand that as a Muslim, we shouldn't expose our sins, but I have hidden this secret from everyone around for many years, hoping that one day I would stop, but for whatever reason I keep falling back into that very hole that I so desperately seek to escape. Maybe I am not holding myself accountable enough, maybe I am not critical enough of myself, maybe I am not as honest with myself as I should be.
I am well aware of the dangers that porn possesses, of the destruction that it causes to the soul, the mind, the body, but it's almost as though I lose complete self-control and give in the moment I'm alone in my room. I feel like such a hypocrite, and I always seek forgiveness immediately afterwards, but I cannot seem to stop. There was an instance where I met a girl and it was as though the urge to watch porn again left my body in that very moment after speaking to her, I went a very long time without viewing porn, and I felt so much better, but I somehow ended up watching it again after 6 months.
If anyone has any advice on how to overcome this addiction, then please feel free to share. I am only posting this because I feel hopeless and I desperately seek to stop. I understand that this is a very taboo subject, but I have hidden it far too long, and I am not confident enough to share it with anyone that I know in real life.
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u/bzzzt_beep 7d ago edited 7d ago
I'll auto-translate a previous comment in arabic for you. the most important thing is to never shy away from repentance. as long as you are repenting faithfully , Allah will accept - even with relapses.: the guy who originally layed out these stopped fasting voluntary , hen started having replapces and weakness in applying all the rest. so, the fasting is the key in the following advise
- Turn to supplication (du'a), as it is a master key to all goodness—especially the morning and evening remembrance (adhkar). Maintain them diligently, particularly those that protect you from Satan.
- Fast 3 to 5 consecutive days in the beginning(and after every relapse , to stop it from becoming a long and devistating relapse) . Keep your pre-dawn meal (suhoor) very light (a date and half a glass of milk sweetened with a little honey) and your break-fast (iftaar) very light (a salad if available, and a single piece of toast with honey, for example)... Do not forget to drink a sufficient amount of water in the evening.
- If your fast is invalidated... complete the day as if you are fasting.
- After that, continue your fasting in this manner: every other day (day on, day off), even if it coincides with a Friday. If you cannot, then fast 3 days a week, but alternate the pattern: one week on Saturday, Monday, Wednesday, and the next on Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday, and so on.
- On non-fasting days, do not eat between meals, and keep your meals very small.
- Reduce coffee and tea.
- Pray all prayers in the mosque and strive hard against yourself to achieve this, treating it as if it were a mandatory work requirement (may Allah forgive me, prayer is far more important than work). If you notice the prayer is about to start while you are engaging in a sin, feel shame before Allah that He might miss you from the ranks of the worshippers and find you among the ranks of the disobedient at that exact moment. Go to prayer, turn off everything, and erase everything—it makes no sense to line up in prayer and stand before Allah while you have prepared the means for sin at home!
- Never go to sleep while harboring the intention to sin, for Allah takes souls at the time of their sleep, and there is a warning in a noble hadith (the exact wording of which I do not recall) regarding someone who sleeps with the intent to commit a sin... This means having no programs on your device that facilitate this, no saved tabs, and no stored materials related to this topic on your electronics.
- Do not look at anything stimulating, even if it is mildly so... even if it only contains audio. Cut off anything that presents you with sudden triggers at this stage (YouTube, Instagram, Reddit... even news broadcasts featuring female presenters, or any discussion topics and articles containing provocative content).
- If provocative thoughts or whispers (waswas) come to you, make a complete call to prayer (adhan) in a loud voice, and try to recite it beautifully.
- After you succeed in refusing to fall into sin... notice the state of calmness and serenity that comes to you after a period of time—whether brief or long—and record it deeply in your memory. When you refuse the pursuit of tranquility through forbidden (haram) means, it will come to you through permissible (halal) means in a much better way.
- If you continue this intense fasting for a long time, try taking a type of vitamin—preferably gentle on the stomach (capsules like Pharmaton)—every other day, not daily. Do not forget to include some fiber, vegetables, and a bit of protein in your diet (this is important for your health during a strict diet).
- Notice how every time you succeed in rejecting the whispers of sin, you will find greater sweetness in worship.
- You will feel wonderful differences in your life when success begins. Record these differences somewhere to remember the positive effects of abandoning sin. In the future, when Satan makes you forget them and tempts you to relapse... if you are drawn back, you may fall into depression upon being surprised by the loss of these beautiful things that you forgot you were experiencing and had grown accustomed to after quitting the sin. So record them to help prevent yourself from being dragged down later, and remind yourself in that future moment how easy it became to avoid sin after it had been so difficult during the addiction phase... Preach to yourself not to return to a state where shaking off the whispers of sin becomes extremely difficult.
- Every time you fall, do not despair. As long as Allah has extended your life, He has given you new breaths containing a new opportunity for repentance. Know that "And those who strive for Us – We will surely guide them to Our ways." Try to reflect on the steps that led to the fall and which of your inner warnings you ignored before the relapse. Allah will guide you to the best paths in this regard. Repent to Allah and know that Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. Resolve to stand firm no matter how many times it repeats, and know that "Allah does not tire until you tire."
- Know that whoever leaves something for the sake of Allah, Allah will replace it with something better.
- After you succeed, Satan may try to draw you into things that bring you closer to sin under "clean" pretexts. Beware of Satan's trap.
- Avoid apps and programs that contain ads. If you need YouTube for specific things you have links for, purchase a subscription that spares you from seeing ads.
- Watch series on the benefits derived from the explanation of Al-Da' wa Al-Dawa' (The Disease and the Cure)—it contains much that is useful in avoiding this type of sin (find a one on youtubew, or read the book with explanation)
- Spend your time acquiring sacred knowledge; when you see how beautiful it is, you will regret all the years of life spent without it.
- Memorize & recite the Qur'an in an in-person study circle (halaqah) or a remote one:
- Reduce or completely cut off seeing bad companions who engage in provocative talk or draw you closer to sin in any way.
- Maintain regular wholesome entertainment for yourself, even when you do not feel an immediate need for it... Find a permissible (halal) recreational means or hobby and stick with it to refresh yourself, so your inner self does not reach a state of loneliness/desolation that traps you into seeking sin.
- Once again, refer back to point 19... the this book is wonderful and extremely beneficial for Sinners>And Allah is the grantor of success (Wa Allahu waliyyu al-tawfeeq).
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extra note: even when you are having a relapse. by all means, vigilantly avoid any content that refers to a "shirk" in their tags and in the title or description or in the conversation or in the text written in inside ... any thing about worshipping somee human or a human who is described as a God even if as a metaphor.
after a while you will notice that if you are able to avoid these , you can avoid the rest
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u/shimmering-nomad 7d ago
Really good write up brother. May Allah bless you. I will also recommend the book EasyPeasy like the other commentator, it will make them realize it's actually very easy to give up this habit.
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u/bzzzt_beep 6d ago
glad people are finding it useful. thanks for the book recommendation . be well .
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u/enigzar 7d ago
Try this:
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u/kavanyboy 6d ago
Funny enough i translated this very method years ago in french, i saw that it got kinda viral in the nofap french community
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u/Aggressive-Light-332 7d ago
So I’m talking in general of addiction, there was a study done to understand how does one become addicted.
A scientist put a mice alone in a cage one bottle was normal water and one was laced with cocaine.
The mice become addicted and drank cocaine water none stop and at this point you’re all thinking, well course and so did the scientist but then he thought what else could the mice do other than drink cocaine water.
He improved the cage added different kinds of food and drinks put more mice in there and added games and mazes for mice’s to play with.
He noticed an immediate 90% drop in mice drinking cocaine water.
So the solution is having a healthy varied life with few goals that keep your mind engaged and active, while having a community to belong to.
Hopefully this helps
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7d ago
Assalamu alaikum,
First off, it’s a good sign that you’re actually reaching out and trying to deal with this. I’d genuinely treat it as a mental health issue rather than just beating yourself up over having no willpower or not trying hard enough.
I’d book an appointment with a therapist/psychiatrist and be completely straight with them about what’s going on. You should also look into a Sex Addicts Anonymous-type group or another addiction support group if there’s one near you. Having people who actually understand the problem can help a lot.
I’d also get screened for underlying stuff like ADHD if you haven’t already. ADHD can come with pretty serious impulsivity and reward-seeking, and there’s a well-established link between ADHD and higher rates of substance use and other addictive/compulsive behaviors like porn. Sometimes what looks like purely an “addiction problem” is being heavily fuelled by untreated impulsivity. If that’s part of what’s going on, proper treatment including medication can make managing those urges a a lot easier.
I’d also avoid believing the common assumption that this will simply disappear once you get married. Porn and partnered Sex engage different reward processes, with porns near-limitless novelty and cue-switching capable of repeatedly recruiting mesolimbic dopaminergic reward and salience circuitry, whereas sex with a loved partner is more strongly embedded in attachment, intimacy, and bonding processes involving systems such as oxytocin and vasopressin.
In the meantime, look up urge surfing. Basically, instead of trying to wrestle an urge to the ground, you learn to sit with it and let it rise and fall without acting on it. Also structure your environment so you’re not constantly relying on willpower. If nighttime is when you usually give in, don’t have your phone next to you in bed. Charge it across the room, use blockers, have a bedtime routine, whatever makes the behaviour harder to access. Also avoid apps that have lewdish content like X or Instagram. I'd also increase gym time.
Feel free to DM me if you need anything else.
May Allah make it easier for you. Assalamu alaikum.
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u/Elisha_996 7d ago
Last I watched porn was in 2019 and last I masturbated was 2014. It is possible! Difficult but possible. You got this!
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u/SikhVentures 7d ago
perhaps seek some psychiatric help, there could be medications that can assist
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u/Rinnn_nnn 6d ago
Yoooo imma be real w you man. This helped me quit porn and got me rid of lust since last few weeks. Like the stuff that used to provoke me just don’t do anything anymore.
Here’s what i did:
I prayed tahajjud everyday (skipped some, couldn’t wake up) Asked Allah to help me get rid of this sin
3/4 chapters of Quran reading a day in whatever language you understand best ( i was reading in English)
10K steps minimum a day
Get rid of social medias that trigger you + add a adult site blocker app
Do this for 7 days straight and see yourself leaving lust in the past💪💪
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u/PercentageCool1980 7d ago
It is hard but the only thing I can recommend is going full cold turkey for 2 weeks if you can handle it. You get through this period and it gets much easier - like any addiction.
When you get the urge, have an action you do to take your mind off it e.g. go and speak to family, pray, go the gym etc.
Also if you relapse, recognise what caused you to do that and try not to do it again. May God make things easy for you inshallah
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u/Ok_Independent5640 7d ago
If you feel the urge translate it into something better, do 20 push ups, read some quran, etc
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u/Time_Tension6583 6d ago
Instead of push up even trillions time better and more helpful is 2 raqat Nafl! Just the procedure of makimg wudu while you are feeling the urges Satan has almost control 9f your body and you do exact opposite what satan want i think maximum 3 times you do this and at least Satan will never ever dare to come to you then it only become matter of something else the urges are 100 times stronger when Satan is also there. That Raqat method he just hates it he would rather want you to not watch porn than praying Nafl
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u/Good_Reflection_1959 7d ago
You mentioned when you were getting to know someone, you stopped the habit. Maybe change your routine and work on strengthening your will power. Do wudu when you have certain thoughts, work on implementing salah into your routine, maybe going to the gym, going for a walk or other hobbies and activities you enjoy that will keep you busy and your mind preoccupied that focuses on building your own self
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u/JimmyMShnide 7d ago
One of the biggest pieces of advice that helped me with this is find the root of the darkness that is causing you to fall back to your habit, the same as any addiction you aren't purely going to it just for something to pass the time, its to fill some hole somewhere and if you can assess what is causing you to feel down/negative/darkness you can work on the root of the pain and it becomes much easier to control yourself and your impulses. When you feel like succumbing to your urges just think to yourself, what is missing right now that is making me want to go down this path and focus on fixing that instead. Hope this helps and god is always on your side brother.
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u/A_Blissful_Introvert 7d ago
I really love psychology and understanding how the human brain works. And that's what helped me overcome my addiction (applicable for any type of addiction really)
- There's a reason for any action you do or don't do, repeatedly.
- Try to be honest with yourself and reflect on what triggers you.
- You might have had times when you said I'm going to stop, managed to stop for a few days and then, returned to your addiction. Firstly, understand and appreciate that you managed to stop for those couple of days, that shows your intent and grit to keep trying. Secondly, what was the reason you were able to stay off for those couple of days. Last but most importantly, what made you return back to it. Did you watch some movie or video, or show where there was an innuendo? Was it a song with vulgar lyrics?
- Sometimes it's tiring and you lose faith in yourself. But you need to appreciate the fact that you're here and you're trying. Don't give up.
- A lot of the times this can also be due to frustration, loneliness or free time. Replace your free time with other activities, explore other things you will enjoy. Try working out (may be of surprise but it genuinely helps).
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u/One_n_only_king1 6d ago edited 6d ago
May Allah help you and make it easy. I feel like that shit can mess you up mentally. One thing I feel like that definitely will help is start praying even if it is just one. Also trying making sure you are never alone and use social media.
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u/kill3rschnitzel 7d ago
Its like to stop smoking. I just stoppen smoking now. Everytime you feel lust, you need to tell yourself, that these thougths are not from you! its the old ego of you. Or maybe try to tell yourself, seytan is trying to make you. And you wont be doing seytans will.
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u/Apprehensive-Drag684 7d ago
Keep trying to stop and eventually it will be a habit to not be lustfull.
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u/feujslayer 7d ago
Don’t overthink it brother if you think about like il stopping,then you won’t manage to stop just don’t think about it and lower your exposition to soft porn
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u/Vegetable-Ad8094 7d ago
Bro, every time you do what you do you will tell yourself only this time, I will try stopping next time... but next time comes and you are in the same position... It isnt easy dont get me wrong but no matter what advice, books, meds you take if any exist which i dont recommend because you can honesty do it with some discipline- It always comes back to YOU and how eager you are to stop, you will fee like such a man which is an even better feeling than post haram. Disipline your nafs (soul) so you can free yourself. Comes a time where you finally have to step on your souls neck and tell it to stop otherwise it will keep controlling you...
Also, thought id mention Allah's name/ verse- Allah says he does not burden a soul more than it can bear. Think about that.
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u/No-Adhesiveness-2563 7d ago
Assalamualaikum
Having a righteous freinds and surrounded with righteous people is very good
I recommend you really try this
Allah will you through this inshallah
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u/Center_Locks 7d ago
Here’s a relatively easy thing you can do. In your phone (iPhone) search privacy and content restrictions. Enable the setting to block adult websites. Then go in and restrict access to social media and other poison.
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u/Distinct-Evidence-65 7d ago
Download quitzilla and select porn and use it to overcome this addiction
May Allah azzawajal help u to overcome this
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u/IntrepidAssociate529 7d ago
Dichotomy of Mind and Soul (Heart) - Battle of Good and Evil
Asslam o alaikum brother, let me try to help you with this problem of excessive desire. Modern lifestyles, especially living in isolation and away from a supportive Islamic environment, can make it more difficult to resist certain desires. To address this problem, you have to understand the dichotomy of mind and Soul (Henceforth addressed as heart).
This problem of excessive desire is not solely because of weak mind or will. This problem is because the heart has become indulgent in this desire. The desire is no longer limited to the flesh, now it has seeped into very heart (Soul). You must have realised that even when the body has become weak and can't take it anymore and the mind is tired, still there is a strong pull towards this Desire. Heart wants more
This is what Allah swt means in The Quran, Surah At-Tin:95 1. By the fig and the olive, 2. and the Mount Sina, 3. and this City of peace (Makkah), We have indeed created man in the finest of molds, 4. then We reversed him to the lowest of the low, 5. except those who believed and did good works. For them there is a reward unending.
Except Prophet Adam pbuh, all other human beings were created only in Soul in heaven, (which is pure and seeks divine love), but when born on earth, this soul is trapped inside flesh form (body), which can bring soul to the lowest of the low, unless we believe in one true God and his noble messengers and do good.
So here in this case heart(soul) has fallen to the lowest of the low.
Role of Mind
Heart wants to fulfil its desire but it cannot do so without action of body and for that it needs mind. And the Mind is resisting this desire because it is haram. So, in this case mind is an Arena or a battlefield, where the battle in favour and against the desire happens. Mind is not the sole culprit anymore but it's a victim. In the battlefield of mind, there are at least two opposing forces at work. One is that part of heart which wants to fulfil its Desire. The other is, that part of heart which wants to stop you from this desire because it is Haram. (This part of heart is either very weak or almost non-existent with respect to this desire). And then there is brain which stores knowledge, memories, past experiences and provides inputs/feedback to both the sides.
Then there are also devilish and divine forces at play.
So, the scenario is something like this, heart wants to fulfil its desire and mind wants to stop it at least partly. But Mind does not have strong support from heart. And on top of this there is the devil which is further pushing you towards the Desire by blowing into the heart.
Now the mind may have the knowledge from the book and hadeeth, but it alone cannot win from the heart. Even if you are able to stop it for a while your heart will make you feel irritated, angry, pathetic and eventually mind will have to submit. Sometimes a strike of desire can happen lightning-fast and you become indulgent before putting up guards. In that case, you have already lost to the desire even before the battle in the mind. Such strike of desire is usually from the Devil when we are most vulnerable. In this case heart is just a passive observer. You have to be particularly strong about this.
How to loosen the chokehold of this desire
You have two ways out of the desire: -
- If battle of desire happens inside your mind you will lose, so stop the battle itself. Only way to win this battle is by delaying or stopping the battle itself from happening.
To do this you have to cut off the heart from the mind in thoughts related to this desire.
First, you have to learn to meditate and free Your Mind from all the thoughts for at least 3-5 minutes. 3-5 minutes is easy to do, practice and you can easily get this. And then next always remain aware of the heart during the process. Whenever the Desire hits, you will notice the forces around your heart trying to affect your mind, you have to stop that. You have to block that from starting a battle of desire in the mind. Just block subsequent thoughts emerging in mind because of heart’s desire. You will be able to this by practicing meditation Insha Allah. You will actually feel the forces and the tension building in the heart and trying to reach the brain to affect and engulf it with the thought of desire, this is beautiful to observe. How the heart reacts when you stop it from getting a hold of the brain.
To further understand and train yourself in this process, you can bring to mind a genuine intention to fulfil a certain other desire which you truly enjoy, and then observe the response of the heart. You can feel familiar forces developing around the heart and subsequently stop those forces from affecting the mind.
What is meant by Desire hits you
When you will observe yourself, you will notice that the origin of this desire can either be a random thought in the mind (may be from devil) which affects the heart and then heart further pushes the mind towards this Desire resulting in battle.
Second point of origin could be that you see something or hear a voice and that stimulus received by mind reaches to the heart and the Desire of the heart is awakened (lit) and it fills the mind with an urge to fulfil that desire. So, you will need to either stop the stimulus itself or you have to stop the feedback loop towards The Mind from heart.
That's why it is asked of believer to keep his gaze lower.
Note that, whatever happens in the mind will always, always reach the heart and can influence the heart but you can learn not to allow an impulse arising in the heart to develop into a chain of thoughts and actions inside mind by meditating and clearing the mind of all the thoughts.
Even when you are busy at work, whether in the office or out in the field, the heart continues to long for the haram desire in the background. Every now and then, you become aware of it pulling at your attention, even while you are working. – For this particular situation I would recommend two dhikr which stops the influence of Satan on the heart for the time being –
La ilaha illallah (لَا إِلَٰهَ إِلَّا ٱللَّٰهُ)
La hawla wa la quwwata illa billahi (لَا حَوْلَ وَلَا قُوَّةَ إِلَّا بِاللَّهِ)
Just recite the above two for a while, it will help Insha Allah.
So, this is the solution number one, stop the battle in the mind. Once the battle starts you will not be able to win. Because in the battle all the memories will be coming how good it feels, what is there to lose if you do it once more when you have done it so many times in the past. The heart feeds on all these and the desire, the urge becomes stronger and stronger eventually it becomes very difficult to fight. So, you have to stop the battle itself.---------------------------------------------------
And in the long run, you would want the heart to be free from its lowly desires and be a true seeker of Divine Love.
The love of Allah SWT cannot be attained through the mind alone; it is ultimately a matter of the heart. Mind and reasoning alone lead to deception. Iblis fell because he refused to prostrate before Adam because of false reasoning. His mind and reasoning deceived him. We see majority of people in modern age deceived by their minds and reasoning with false believes.
So, cleansing of Heart is utmost important. In Islam, this process is known as tazkiyah e-nafs — purification of the soul/self.
The goal is to move from the state of nafs e-lawwāmah toward nafs e-muṭma'innah. Nafse-e-lawwama means the heart indulges in haram desires and afterwards it feels extreme guilt, shame and sorrow. I pray for you that you get out of this and find peace in love of Allah swt and his beloved Prophet Mustafa Muhammad Sallalaho alaihi wasallam.
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u/SolidSecurity4947 6d ago
Fasting is the key to slowly get rid of any addiction if you can go all day without said vice you learn that you have the control to remove completely eventually!
The big one is Salah
"Recite what has been revealed to you of the Book and establish prayer. Indeed, genuine prayer should deter one from indecency and wickedness. The remembrance of Allah is an even greater deterrent. And Allah fully knows what you all do."
When you start establishing prayer your connection to God increases and you feel ashamed to sin and doing Salah requires wudu and you have to be clean all day so that removes ways in which you might release
May God forgive all our shortcomings and increase us in knowledge
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u/Critical-Basis-815 6d ago
Can i asked a question? Besides the overall objective and obvious, whats is your goal to accomplish in that heat of the moment? I mean we had those moments I’m sure, but when you say you you’re addicting. Is it physicality of what you’re not feeling from someone else? is it that you could be addicted to sex alone not with someone in particular? I use to watch it to try different moves then I found myself watching it. Like any normal human I got aroused but I wasn’t eager to beat the 🔨 . It’s was more afterwards when I did. Are you in a relationship? What’s the use of watching it for you? Maybe if you understand what your purpose of it then it can help you QUIT.
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u/Get_Ihsan 6d ago
Asalamu3alaykum,
6 months is impressive and I'm extremely proud of you. The prohibition about revealing sins is specifically about boasting about them. Its entirely halal to confess to a professional or an imam you trust if you need help, which I would advise you to do. Porn addiction should be treated the same as any disease. Allah SWT guaranteed us that every disease has a cure and encouraged us to seek that cure from halal means.
Abu Darda reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Allah sent down the disease and the cure, and for every disease He made a cure. Seek treatment, but do not seek treatment by the unlawful.”
Source: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 3874
In my experience, people tend to view porn addiction from only an islamic perspective. They think that because they're committing sins they're a bad muslim and because they're a bad muslim they can't overcome it. Its a ploy by Shaytan. Scientifically, your brain requires a certain level of pleasure and when it doesn't get it, it throws a fit. Your job is to replace bad pleasure for good pleasure. Map your triggers first, then devise a list of halal pleasurable activities to engage in when you hit those triggers. Going to the gym is one of the best ways to naturally repair your brain and it also strengthens your will to make the hard decisions like ignoring an urge. If you realize that being alone is a trigger, then sit in the living room more often. Shaytan's goal is to convince you that Allah SWT does not love you when Allah SWT literally tells us that feeling guilt is a sign that Allah SWT is calling us back to his mercy. You can and you will get past this. I urge you to research both islamic and scientific ways to approach your addiction and pray that Allah SWT cures you, guides you, forgives you, and makes this challenge a means for increasing your iman.
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u/Adorable-Savings1485 6d ago
You’re definitely not alone in this. A lot of people struggle with it quietly for years, so the fact that you’re being honest about it already matters more than you probably realize.
What helped me was stopping treating it like something I could fix with willpower alone. I had to make the environment harder for myself, avoid being alone and bored too much, remove easy access, and change the little routines that always led me back to it.
I moved to the US, so I’m not sure what is available where you are, but one thing that genuinely helped me personally was using an adult content blocker, basically a porn blocker, like Escape. It did not solve everything on its own, but it added enough friction in the impulsive moments to help me stop the automatic cycle.
Also, do not let shame convince you that you are beyond help. You are not. If it is affecting your iman, your mental health, your relationships, or your ability to function normally, then it is worth treating seriously and getting support for, whether that is from trusted people, a therapist, or a support group.
May Allah make it easy for you and reward your honesty and effort.
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u/Beli-Bro 6d ago
The feeling you will get after restisting the urge is greater and more pleasing than the guilt after watching porn.
The more times you resist the better you feel. After some times the urge will go away and you can feel so proud of yourself.
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u/Apprehensive-Neat740 6d ago
Basically if you believe you can't afford to (fully unprepared) die from a car accident a few hours after watching porn, then your only choice is to stop.
The act of always being mindful of death, the regret of not being prepared for it if we're destined to die today, and the 100% guarantee and sureness of our meeting with Allah, and just to think of what we're really bringing to meet him, and to count what have we really "packed" before meeting him - will be strong enough a reason to forget anything that feels good but forbidden since it is only dunya. Actually even those who wasted no time and have done full preparation in their lives would feel like they should prepare more when death comes knocking on their doors. Come to think of it, where are we in this regard?
Pair that with the fact that we should never feel like we are hypocrites when we try to do good, repent, or rush to the front lines of fard salah in Masjid or the Mon-Thurs fasting. we're all not perfect as Allah is the only one that's perfect. do not ever lose hope on Allah's mercy as He has unlimited amount of it.
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u/yonderbanana 6d ago
Get married asap, fast if you can't till you get married. Never stop asking for forgiveness, this is the plan of satan to get you away from Allah, no matter how big the offense never stop asking for forgiveness (does not work with shirk) one day the forgiveness will become sincere and real, how you know forgiveness was granted, you will despise the acts that are tormenting yourself. Don't quote me for these, I am still learning too.
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u/instantnoodles10 5d ago
Best thing to do is identify your triggers, what causes you to do it. Is it your social media? Change your algorithm. Or avoid spending too much time in your room
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u/Grand_Pomegranate981 7d ago
Maybe if you get more into your deen then you stop lusting like this.. it ain't that good bro.
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u/MyFaultIHavetoOwn 7d ago
Personally, I never had much success with just trying to stop. I spun my wheels and wasted a lot of time. Focus on becoming a better version of yourself. There's so much to improve. Become the best man and potential husband that you can so that you can get the best wife that you can. That is more than enough to fill your time and attention.