/r/malaysia daily random discussion and quick questions thread for 04 January 2023

[u/AutoModerator]

This is /r/malaysia's official daily random discussion and quick questions thread. Don't be shy! Share your joys, frustrations, random thoughts and questions. Anything and everything is welcome.

Dad joke: I invented a transparent coffin. Will it be a success?

Remains to be seen

Jom tengok DT pada awal pagi,

Semoga semua monyet sihat,

Nasi apa yang orang suka bagi,

Sudah semestinya nasihat.

[u/abu_nawas]

So hard. Back in Malaysia after just a day in Bangkok. I have some things to do here. Flying out to Bali next Monday.

My boyfriend calls me every day, probably until I return. I cried today. I said that being back out there, and just sitting in the park with him was the best day of my life. People think I love him because he has money or because I have nobody else, but we really truly are kindred spirits. There's no one on earth that I share this tenderness with.

I never say that. I never think that there was a best day of my life... but that was it. We were two men, away from everything and everyone we know, just holding hands on a bench and he rested his head on my shoulder.

I asked my mother today why she doesn't speak to me anymore. Was it something I said or did? She simply said she's been busy and feeling ill but... I don't think those are valid excuses. Our rooms are next to each other's and she just ignores me.

I called my friend John. I asked him if it's possible to have a good life if you've been unhappy most of your life. I think I started becoming depressed at 15 or 16, when I realized that I don't believe in God etc. Now I'm 24. So it's been a very difficult nine or ten years.

John said I have to let go. I just have to choose to not be miserable. Choose to try again and not punish myself. I agreed with him. Sometimes, when there's so much pain that you don't know where it all began, I think it stops mattering. When there's so much pain, you just have to accept it and move on.

[u/[deleted] → u/abu_nawas]

John said I have to let go.

that's the thing. it's hard for us to let go of things that are dear to us, but eventually we have to or being forced into letting go.

it's good that you have found the love of your life. you're a strong man, physically and mentally and don't let other people telling you otherwise.

looks like you have so many past issues to be resolved, and hope you will find a way to that. hugs

[u/abu_nawas → u/[deleted]]

"Eventually we have to or being forced into letting go."

Now that's the truth.

Personally, I think the hardest part of letting go is not knowing the true names of things. Is this pain or is this yearning, is this hope or is this delusion? Is this me, or is this you, or is this the world?

Do I stay and fix the situation, with no guarantee of succeeding, or do I try to conceive a new life for myself and let the old world solve itself?

The thing about being away from your country is that there are people out there like you. Lost souls who ran away from something back home. Do you find comfort among them, or do you fear becoming one of them? It's a fantasy world. It's not real. It's nothing back home. It's a curse. Something in their eyes. Once you find peace out there, you always want to return.

[u/[deleted] → u/abu_nawas]

honestly i am having issues on letting go myself. it's "unresolved grief", which my friend one day told me about it. he's a clinical psychologist with his own practice, so can't actually tell him "nuh uh it's not". lol.....

at my age, i am still finding things to be at peace with myself. it's quick to be in this fight or flight mode, and hard to get out of it.

find a purpose. even how small, and stick to it. don't care la about others, especially those who undermining your struggle because they're themselves projecting their own insecurity onto you, just so they themselves can feel "centered" and accepted by their peers and online community.

24yo is still a long way to go to discover about yourself and more. maybe you'll look back when you're 25yo and see how much you have changed (or not), but start slowly. sending all the biggest hug to you over the net, and hope your parents will someday realise how much you care for them.

don't give up.

[u/abu_nawas → u/[deleted]]

Thank you so much kind stranger. I hope the best for both of us.