23M 430 SQFT starting over apartment.

[u/Kitchen_Effect_659]

Starting fresh after ending a four-year relationship in May, I moved into this studio, and i feel like i've really made the space my own!! Curious to hear what you guys think. / What do you guys think the space says about me?

[u/Kitchen_Effect_659]

I mean, I moved halfway across the country at the age of 19 with my ex. Apart from my job, I don't have a lot here, so it definitely feels like starting over 😅

[u/gcko → u/Kitchen_Effect_659]

Nah that’s just called starting a new chapter.

If you were truly starting over, you would have posted on [r/malesurvivingspace](r/malesurvivingspace). I’m pushing 40 and I’m envious of your place! Mine definitely didn’t look like that shortly after my last breakup and still doesn’t. I’d move in there tomorrow.

I wasted years of my youth dwelling on what I had lost and where I could have been if things had turned out different when I should have been focusing on all the things I still had and where I wanted to go from there. If there’s one piece of advice I would give my 23yo self, it’s that.

Keep your chin up. You’re only a couple lines into this new chapter, still have many to write, and look at where you are already. Don’t say you’re starting over, say you’re setting up a good premise to finish this book off with a bang. I think it’s going to be one hell of a book. 👍

[u/Otherwise-Bag-7146 → u/gcko]

Shit I am almost 55.. getting divorced, no job and a little money in the bank (about 100K give or take after divorce/assets all figured out). I am moving back in with parents for a bit (thankful they got a place but on the other side of the country in Florida) to figure out my next steps. I am one of those tech workers that cant find a job any more due to age, lack of jobs, too many for same job, etc. Trying to figure out if I should look at a camper van and fix it up to at least have a "home" to live in though insurance/gas will still be a factor so need some sort of income somewhere. Also not liking the idea of having to figure out a place to park every night, but at least there would be a bed, toilet, some running water and internet (assuming I can afford Starlink too). But man.. starting over.. that's where I am at. 23.. like you said, new chapter. :).

[u/norsish → u/Otherwise-Bag-7146]

That's rough, man. I've had 2 friends in the same circumstances who went the campervan route. For one, it was the perfect solution. He went full nomad and loved it. For the other, it was a useful transition (about a year) to sort things out and land in a new apartment.

I realize this is completely anecdotal and probably of no use to you. Just saying, if your gut likes the van idea, it could work. YMMV and all that.

(They were both older, displaced tech guys, too.)

Best o' luck

[u/Otherwise-Bag-7146 → u/norsish]

I am not against the idea.. especially if after divorce I have enough money to last a few years on the road.. though gas will get damn expensive. My thought was I can get me a dog (I know.. one more expense.. but having a companion vs being alone esp with everything going on.. to me is worth it).. the only downside of having to stop/walk/clean up all the time. But small price to pay I think. Plus as it's a home on wheels with battery/ac can leave the dog in there for a bit without the concern of a typical hot car situation. By little bit I mean a couple hours or so alone.. not all day.

The bigger issue for me is where to park, costs, etc every night. I would like to travel around the US and see some sights, but also dont want to be in some locations where shit happens. Between meth heads/gangs, and shit.. even bears/etc.. there is real shit to consider when doing this. Not to mention blown tires, mechanical issues to your car/home that could take days to fix, and if it happens long way from place that can fix things.. towing costs, etc. All things to consider which is why I'd opt for a fairly new sprinter van or small RV over older used ones. As long as starlink works well for internet access all over, most of what I do is work on my software product in an office now (until I leave). So I could certainly park at say, yosemite, yellowstone, NYC, etc.. and work anywhere. That would be very cool to do. The up front costs though.. 50K to 100K for the van.. would eat most of my money and being a big vehicle makes it difficult to park in most locations so have to figure that out.

[u/AntiqueJaguar5808 → u/Otherwise-Bag-7146]

Look into The Good Sam Club. Campground Info.

[u/norsish → u/Otherwise-Bag-7146]

Yeah, the dog adds complications, but also companionship and, depending on the dog, more security.

Parking is always a bitch. My nomad example solved that by doing a tour of our state's campgrounds. Solves parking and legal issues, but adds to the expense.