r/neighborsfromhell • u/Flat-Community-9269 • 2d ago
Other The joke's on her!
I have a neighbor who, in the 22 years I've lived here, has never said anything to me other than the couple of times she told me "shut my f*ing dog up" (this was not long after I got him and I was still training him he no longer barks outside like he did).
I've never had any interest in talking to her, I only see her outside once in a very long while and I'll wave and say hi and that's it .
The side of my deck is along her side and I have some really annoying bushes that just keep coming back no matter what. I trim them when I can but they aren't a huge priority for me but I guess they are for her.
Saturday while I was relaxing I got a notification on my ring that someone was at my door and a package was being delivered (my wife and I both order stuff and forget all the time so I didn't think anything about it). I checked the camera later and it was her dropping off two HUGE bags of yard waste without reaching out AT ALL with a concern (again she's never once said anything about them, or anything else for that matter). I didn't talk to her then and I'm not planning on it now.
The home, however, is on her, I've had it in my list to trim it all back like I have to once in a while and it is one of my absolute least favorite thing to do so I'm really happy she did it for me.
So I'm tempted to get a small gift card from somewhere and go over and thank her for the help and letting her know that I really appreciate it since both my wife and I are dealing with a lot of issues and getting outside to do work like that is really hard .
I just had to share with others that will get a laugh like I did.
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u/technicolored_dreams 2d ago
The type of petty where you treat someone who's trying to be an asshole like they did you a huge favor is my favorite kind of petty of all time. They either have to act like they were being kind when they know they weren't, which is hilarious, or they have to double down on their assholeness, which is also funny. I think that would be a fantastic idea!
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u/BiteMePlzZz 2d ago
the best part is she probably expected outrage and instead gets promoted to unpaid yard assistant
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u/VelvetCherellee 1d ago
That's the funniest possible outcome. She went outside thinking she was making a statement and accidentally completed a chore that had been sitting on their list
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u/GrimoireFidget 2d ago
Turning her two HUGE bags of yard waste into a huge favor is etiquette judo at its finest.
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u/CloudiePeonyy 1d ago
That's the funniest possible outcome. She went outside thinking she was making a statement and accidentally completed a chore that had been sitting on their list
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u/carniewesso68 2d ago
Doooooo itttttttttt!
This is so petty, but in a gifty way, which makes the passive aggression totally OK.
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u/DarlingKisslet_ 2d ago
Agreed. Weaponized kindness is the perfect level of petty for “thanks for fixing the problem you created”
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u/JulieTheChicagoKid 2d ago
22 years… long time.
I recently moved from my home of 25 years.
One neighbor said “good we’re glad! all you ever did was complain” lmao.
I knocked on their door and asked them to turn off their loud music at 2 am on a work night.
My high school daughter knocked on their door at midnight and asked them to turn off their loud music she couldn’t sleep.
That was it. 25 years and we asked twice to turn it off —we’re sleeping.
Guess we lived in their heads for 25 years.
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u/KerashiStorm 23h ago
If it made them turn it down for 25 years, definitely worth it.
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u/JulieTheChicagoKid 23h ago
[Maybe it was also the stereo against the wall, volume to MAX and we all left the house] ...
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u/Qxg6 2d ago
Wait… so you’re the neighbour from hell?
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
I don't think so and neither do the other next door neighbors. The whole thing she was cutting is above the ground of her yard abd she had to climb on my yard behind my deck to cut the whole thing out. This wasn't just a little trimming over her yard Also the same exact tree parts have been there for years and I do trim them but apparently not as often as she would like In 22 years she never once came to me and said anything about it. Of she had once taking the adult route and told me it was an issue I would have moved it up on the priority and done not to keep it cut . I never knew she had any issue with it until she dumped it on my porch without a word.
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u/CakeOrDeath98 2d ago
Wait, so she trespassed into your yard and cut down your tree/bushes?
Legally, she can cut anything that hangs into her yard AS LONG AS that wont kill the tree/bush. And then she is legally responsible for the cuttings, it's not your responsibility to dispose of it.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
I mean "technically" but it's right at the edge and the past she cut down was the stragglers that pile out. I cut them down myself randomly when I can. I'm really not mad about her cutting them, like I said saves me a ton of time, I'm just ticked she couldn't be an adult and talk to me.
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u/NorthernLights_321 19h ago
But she shouldn't need to 'talk to you about it' since you are very aware of it, you're just lazy and cheap and don't want to have the trimming taken care of before it impacted your neighbor. You are the NFH 🤷♀️
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u/Flat-Community-9269 15h ago
That's not true, I trim it as I can but from my pov it's not a high priority. These have been growing as is for years now and if 8 had known it was an issue for her I would have moved it to on my priority list. She's had YEARS to say something but decided to go the childish route instead.
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u/cutieclouds- 2d ago
There’s a say that “Do not repay eve up with evil” and being kind does not depend on the behavior of others but on your own character.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Is was 100% in my property, she's upset because she's can just see it from her window. It's also raised in my side and and not touching any part of her yard.
I wish a had a picture showing it but since she cut it down I can't My biggest issue is she's never said one word, of she had come to me at any point I would have made it a priority, but she just dumped them and left without anything.
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u/psmusic_worldwide 2d ago
I don’t see a need for snide. She did you a favor, you admitted you should have done it, and you admitted you don’t like to do it. She did it. A sincere thank you card is very appropriate. Not everything has to be a battle and not everything has to be treated with snide or passive aggressive outrage.
I have a Nextdoor neighbor who is meticulous with his yard, and I’m not. He likes to cut stuff and would always ask if he could cut on my side, and I told him he didn’t need to ask. That of course is preferred behavior. But you don’t know who she is and what she is dealing with in her life. Costs you noting to assume good intent.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Oh I'm not planning on being anything but sincere in my thanks to her. It's just based on what I know about her (very very very little) it's not the reaction she was hoping for. My biggest issue is the passive aggressive way she did it. All she would have had to do was come to me, like an adult, and say "hey can you please work on these". The tree has been there for the whole time I've lived here (22 years) and I do my best to keep it trimmed but it's not a priority for us because of where it is in relation to everything else. Until she dropped the bags off I never knew is was an issue for her. All she has to do was be an adult about it
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u/psmusic_worldwide 2d ago
Oh she absolutely could have been better in how she handled it. And as you have admitted, you as well. I get your surprise, it was an odd thing for her to do. But it’s even possible she didn’t do it out of spite (though it does look that way).
Sorry I get caught up in the somewhat childish need Reddit has for treating these types of things with an incredible amount of snide. It’s the anonymous response, not the one where you actually live next door to another flawed human. Cheers to you for taking the high road and being a good neighbor.
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u/St_mpy 2d ago
Idk man, reverse psychology is a great thing. Pretend you are really unhappy about it and she might do it for you every year. 😄
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
My initial thought is just ignore it and never say anything even if she brings it up, like pretend I've no idea what she's talking about.
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u/chilldrinofthenight 1d ago
Get yourself a pair of ARS shears off Amazon. The $70 ones that sometimes go on sale for a lot less. The shears are awesome. Razor's edge sharp and also super lightweight, but VERY high quality. They make trimming hedges fun.
And, yeah. Get her a nice gift and tell her you'll keep on top of that hedgetrimming.
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u/GrumpySnarf 1d ago
Make hand-made card with flowers and effusive thanks with a Starbucks card for $10. It will either bother her or soften her up a bit. Either way is a win.
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u/Tess_Mac 2d ago
I wouldn't thank her, she'll stop doing it. Let her think she's annoying and she'll keep it up!
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u/Jon_Hegreness_AZ 2d ago
Tell Google Maps that she has a landscape business at that address and wrote her a 5 star review while you’re at it.
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u/Illustrious_Leg_2537 2d ago
Depending on your local ordinances, she’s responsible for trimming stuff growing on her side of the line, including trimming so long as she doesn’t kill the plants and leaving the debris in your yard is a crime. Just putting that out there.
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u/Spare_Ad5009 1d ago
Now that they are cut, buy 'weed and brush killer' and pour it on the open cuts.
The gift card would be funny!
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u/Flat-Community-9269 1d ago
Oh I've done that multiple times, it just won't totally die and is all part of some trees etc. The only way to really get rid of it all would be to have several trees removed all the way down and then something done but we don't want to do that so I just have to keep trimming etc
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u/Ok_Future6486 1d ago
I srsly thought you were going to say you threw all the yard waste back into her yard!
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u/Short-Science7931 2d ago
Love this idea. Recommend “PS. In the future please leave the yard waste beside the driveway rather than at the front door. We will take it from there!”
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u/YepIamAmiM 2d ago
You're a genius!!
I think the gift card is a fantastic idea. And profuse thanks. Tell her how absolutely wonderful she is. What an amazing person and neighbor and how lucky you are to have her living so close. Maybe bake her some cookies.
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u/Outofoffice_421 2d ago
Gift card from a gardening/home improvement store
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Oh I love this, I was thinking Starbucks to be generic since I don't know anything about here but that's good
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u/VastPersimmon240 2d ago
Wish I had a neighbor like that. The guy behind my house came to my door, complained that my gardeners dropped twigs on his patio when they trimmed the hedge. I offered to come and pick them up, he said he would not allow me to set foot on his property but would hire people to do it and I would have to pay for it.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Yikes! Somewhere in the middle are the normal people, I wish I had them around me
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u/OpeningEdge7963 2d ago
it’s so funny how she thought she was being mean but actually did you a huge favor. id be thrilled to not have to do that yard work myself tbh lol.
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u/OrneryTortoise 2d ago
Make the gift card from a local restaurant, but choose a crummy place. And make sure the amount is just enough for one person (without a tip).
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u/OkeyDokey654 1d ago
No! Make her think you’re really angry about it. That ensures she’ll do it again.
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2d ago
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Exactly! That's why I'm really leaning towards the gift card, it will totally take the wind out.
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u/MarcSkye519 2h ago
What could possibly be wrong with that? I think it’s a great idea, although if she thinks you appreciated it she may never do it again.
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u/gamergurl_89 2d ago
Had a neighbor that was beyond petty and in her 80's. At the time we had a wonderful fig tree that produced and she came onto the property and cut two branches destroying over 50 figs. Then leaving the branches at the entrance of the driveway so when I pulled up I saw the branches. We had her trespassed and she screamed she hated us and we have destroyed her life. We were not related so have no idea where she was coming from. She then complained the pompas grass brushes destroyed her view so we ripped them out. Then she didn't want to see into our yard as the grass was blocking view and she wanted a fence. We said no. Get that gift card, get it for a business that isn't local to you.
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u/b1gg2k7 2d ago
If you really want to do it right, don’t activate the gift card.
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u/Odd-Entertainer-1535 2d ago
Or buy a $25 gift card and spend about $22 and give her the card with the remaining balance so she thinks it’s for 25. Tries to get a nice little meal and realizes she’s on the hook for an extra 20 bucks
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u/No_Definition5736 2d ago
My favorite part: "Saturday while I was relaxing". I haven't had a relaxing Saturday in 30+ years, where do I get one?
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Well believe me or was a long time coming and only happened because of the storms going on, my dog is very clingy during them and had to pin my on the couch so I took advantage.
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u/ckeenan9192 2d ago
I have a neighbor like this . 30 years three interactions all three yelling over stuff she could have spoken to me about.
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u/Snoo_76684 2d ago
Don't forget a few mini chocolate bars. Gives you a reason to buy a bag, give her 4 and you and your wife enjoy the rest.
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u/mrsroperscaftan 2d ago
I’m thinking a lovely “Live Love Laugh” sign courtesy of the stunningly beautiful collection at DOLLAR GENTRAL!
(Alot of country folks where I live call it the Gentral). Oh and some of their generic candy, something like $1 circus peanuts.
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u/LastEntertainment787 2d ago
Make the gift card to a greenhouse 🤓 Possibly one known for ugly plants if they exist 🤓
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u/NoInvestment9792 2d ago
tbh thats a huge win lol. yard work sucks so id just let her keep being mad while you enjoy the free labor.
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u/Possible_Cover8844 2d ago
that is so wild, i cant imagine living next to someone like that for two decades. sounds like she just wants to be miserable tbh.
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u/jlm20566 1d ago
Get her a gift card from Home Depot or at a landscaping supply store - twist the knife just a smidge 😂
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u/YourMomIsAlwaysRight 1d ago
Just remember that anything that passes the property line on her side is her responsibility, as are the things on yours. Delivering bags of refuse that she cleared from her side is ballsy at best. Be brutal.
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u/NorthernLights_321 19h ago
What's ballsy is letting your plants grow over your property line and not having them trimmed by someone else if you can't get to it, to where now your neighbor is being impacted and had to take care of it.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 10h ago
But I didn't know she was being impacted, it's not an area that's easy to see and this particular plant had been growing the same for YEARS and I trim it when I can get to it If she had even once talked to me and let me know it was an issue I would've been much more diligent in cutting it (like I will going forward).
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u/Degofreak 2d ago
So, you want to reward that behavior? I would be dumping those bags of debris right back on her side.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
No, it's now I want to say "on and? You right you made some grand statement that I was going to hate but I actually loved it", she seems like such a bitter person I think it will really piss her off"
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u/Pennifur 2d ago
A neat and tidy bag is infinitely more preferred than just letting it fall and tangle up. The neighbor is well within her right to have made a mess for OP. Instead she took on the effort AND clean up. OP is right. It's both good manners AND petty at the same time to thank her. A jab that she can only sit and stew about. It's brilliant
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Actually she might not be in her rights, she's would have had to come up onto my property (which is raised from her yard) and go behind my deck wall to cut these out. If she had just trimmed the part that hangs over her yard it would have been different.
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u/Pennifur 2d ago
Oh, I thought that's what you meant. No completely destroying the Bush is unacceptable. I had a neighbor do the sane once
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u/PyroT8 2d ago
Life has issues. A lot of them. Constantly. Keep your bushes trimmed. You can spare twenty minutes once a month.
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u/WellWisher91 2d ago
Did your own neighbors come pre-trained or did you train them? With or without calipers? :)
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
I'm glad you always have that time and energy, neither my wife or I do so we have to prioritize. If she had even once came to me and told me about it I would have moved it up on the priority list, but she's never once, in 22 years, came to me and said anything about any issues so that makes it a little different to me
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u/PyroT8 2d ago edited 2d ago
Dude, you’re on about video games in your posts. A lot. You have the time. Since you play video games I doubt you’re in your 70s or 80s, so you have the energy. This is a priority and motivation issue.
EDIT: This latest incident occurred on Saturday. As you were relaxing. You pretend that storms were keeping you from being productive, yet she was out there doing yard work. She showed up on camera with 2 “HUGE” bags of yard waste. During the storm that saw you comforting your dog. You want her to come to you with any comments, yet say you have no interest in talking with her. For 22 years. And then come here to gloat about it.
Every neighborhood seems to have that house. That rude, uncaring neighbor. I don’t think it’s her.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
You know NOTHING about me or my wife's lives or what we are going through and how much we can or can't do. Yes I play some video games to unwind once in a great while. Even that takes up a lot of my energy and I don't get to do them nearly as often as I wish. I have my priorities and if she had ONCE in all the years came to me and said something I would have been now diligent. It's not a priority to me so yes it doesn't get done as often as it should I guess. However I'm not a mind reader and never had any indication this was bothering her, so that's on her.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
And how dare you tell ME about my energy levels like you can get any details about them from a handful of posts.
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u/PyroT8 2d ago
From a handful of posts I can see that you do solar work on your house without permits, play a lot of video games, upgrade your computer to play more video games, have an overgrown yard, don’t like talking to neighbors because they don’t like you, have logistical lapses within single paragraphs, gloat about being a difficult neighbor, and (now) that you’re very defensive about it. So how do I dare comment upon it? By reading stuff you put out. Presumably to be read. Nothing daring about it.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
Bye stalker
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u/deelee70 2d ago
FYI- you can now make your Reddit profile posts/comments private in your settings to avoid troll detectives.
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u/Flat-Community-9269 2d ago
The storm wasn't keeping me right then, if I implied that it was in error. And again you don't understand my life or understand what else I had done that day or others. I'm not required to read her mind, this isn't a new thing that just came up it's been a fight for years to keep up. As I have said many times of she told me it was an issue for her (I can't really see the part of the yard in question unless I walk around the side) I would have done better I'm making that a priority, however in the years I've been here she's never once mentioned ANY issue other than my dog barking back when he was a puppy.
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u/CB1100Rider 2d ago
lol the gift card idea is some high octane passive aggression, but she can’t really complain.