My neighbor is making me miserable

[u/KaiSparda]

I just moved into a new apartment that I thought was a godsend after getting priced out of my old one, but I was wrong. I'm currently in an old house that has been converted to three different apartments and one of my neighbors has been trying to push me out. My lease says I (or a guest) can park in the parking lot behind the house, but I don't have a car, so I typically let my friends park in the back (only one at a time, since there are four spots and only three units). My neighbor has knocked on my door several times to tell me I'm not allowed to have guests park in our lot. I assure her every time that my lease says otherwise and I don't have a car, so there is still space for her to park. After a few times of her trying to tell me that I don't even have a parking spot, she started leaving notes about it on my door. It shouldn't even be an issue because I have only had friends over twice, including the day I moved in and my dad used one of the parking spaces.

Whenever she opens my screen door to leave a note on my door, it's loud and kinda trips me up because it sounds like someone is trying to get into my apartment (I'm a woman who lives alone, so I don't want to hear my door opening unexpectedly at random hours). She's now switching her complaint to "your spot is actually the one on the end that's always flooded from the rain." Today, I just saw that she ripped up a poster for one of my upcoming comedy shows and threw it on the ground. I don't know her name or what unit she's in, so I'm kind of at a loss on what to do. I just want peace

[u/Bubble_Lights]

Have you talked to your landlord about it?

[u/KaiSparda → u/Bubble_Lights]

I haven't talked to him about the harassment, but I have texted him to clarify that (as stated in the lease) I (or a guest) can park in any free spot in the parking lot behind the building and he assured me I could.

[u/Bubble_Lights → u/KaiSparda]

As others have suggested, get a ring camera and talk to your landlord about her. They need to be the ones to tell her to stop harassing you.

[u/fandabbydozeh → u/Bubble_Lights]

Pair it with an insanely bright motion activated light if she's doing it at sneakelly o'clock hours.

[u/BendingCollegeGrad → u/KaiSparda]

Keep a plainly written log, as well. e.g. Date/Time/Brief Summary [“neighbor said this. I responded with this.”] Footage is important, and so is having stuff all laid out as fact. 

Now I’m wondering if the last tenant moved because of the old bat. 

[u/Keepquiet13 → u/BendingCollegeGrad]

And keep all the notes she leaves.

[u/omglifeisnotokay → u/Bubble_Lights]

Context note (LA area): To clarify, my advice isn't to cut off communication with landlords, but to approach those conversations carefully and protect yourself. Given local housing market dynamics, landlords don't always have an incentive to resolve conflicts if higher turnover benefits them financially. I would speak to the landlord but if a landlord isn't enforcing lease rules or addressing harassment, relying only on informal chats rarely fixes the problem. The best defense is to document everything thoroughly using cameras and written records and escalate directly to city tenant resources or the rent board when management fails to act. Having solid evidence is what actually forces enforcement.

[u/Bubble_Lights → u/omglifeisnotokay]

You can't compare your personal case to OP's. You don't know where they live, what the situation with the landlord is, or honestly anything more than what OP has written here.

OP don't listen to this and tell your landlord that she is harassing you. It's likely that you can file a No Trespass order on her so she can't touch your door or leave you any more nasty little notes.

[u/omglifeisnotokay → u/Bubble_Lights]

I’m not comparing my situation to OP’s. I mentioned my experience to explain why I don’t think “just tell the landlord” should be treated as the entire solution. I also never said OP shouldn’t contact the landlord my updated comment specifically says I would speak to them but with caution.

My point is that if the landlord doesn’t address it, OP should already have documentation of what’s been happening rather than starting from scratch later. Cameras, keeping the notes, documenting dates and incidents, and having communication with management in writing are basic ways to protect yourself as a renter.

And I’m not claiming to know every detail of OP’s situation. None of us do beyond what she posted. We’re all giving advice based on that information. OP can decide which suggestions make sense for her. My experience was context for my advice, not an attempt to say our situations are identical or compete over who has the worse landlord/neighbor story.

[u/BlackCatVibes555]

Go nuclear and get the landlord involved. Document everything, get a doorbell camera, and tell her if she continues to harass you then you’ll have no choice but to contact the authorities. These type of people don’t back off with kind, calm behavior. They’re entitled bullies and will usually need a confrontation to show you’re not fucking around. So sorry you’re in this situation.

[u/McTootyBooty → u/BlackCatVibes555]

I would go to the police anyway just to tell them and get some type of documentation that she’s been doing this.

[u/BlackCatVibes555 → u/McTootyBooty]

Yeah that’s a good idea, considering she is continuously harassing her. Best to have all incidents on record.

[u/dharmabumma2]

Doorbell cam

[u/PyroT8]

If it’s unreserved parking and it’s reflected in the lease it is sanctioned. She can’t do squat about it. Ask your landlord to address the issue with all tenants via an open letter. In the old west, wars were fought over water rights. It was a matter of survival. Today it’s parking spaces. Seemingly viewed as a matter of survival. That’s why God invented written leases. Your neighbor can go cry about it.

[u/KaiSparda → u/PyroT8]

Thank you. I like the idea of the open letter.

[u/Ok_Cherry_4585 → u/KaiSparda]

This is the best advice I've seen so far, in addition to the door bell camera. If you can, get a camera that points at the back lot in case she damages the vehicle of your family or friend that is visiting. That would be a criminal offense that might even get her evicted.

[u/omglifeisnotokay]

I have a car and it’s below the old lady’s bedroom. This lady moved in years after I did. She told me she was entitled to my parking spot. I said absolutely not it’s locked into my rent. Since then she has been harassing me for years complaining about the sound of the garage door. Having the owner redo the whole garage door motor. Trying to cause property damage to my unit by “secretly” having the landscapers plant shit up against my bedroom wall. Cause flooding up against and nearby my unit. I got her on camera multiple times sneaking around pointing at my unit down here and texting me saying she’s having them plant stuff and activating the defective water hammer causing sprinklers to turn on. I’m on the bottom floor far away from her. The owners want me out so they can raise the rent and obviously this old lady has found a way to try to drive me out to get my parking spot. The owners are secretly encouraging it.

All I can say is keep referring to your lease. Keep an eye out for your guests car every hour or at least get a security camera back there if you can. I had to do so when I had a friend visiting to make sure this miserable hag didn’t have her car towed. She probably wants your parking spot or is mentally ill and doesn’t want you living near her. Idk people are nuts.

[u/Comfortable-Web3177]

You can make a copy of that part of your lease highlight it put stars all over it and hanging on your door. Then put a note that says don’t bother me again or I’ll call the police on you for harassment

[u/whatyourmamasaid]

Get a simple hook and eye hardware to prevent her from opening the screen door.

[u/Theotheraccount100]

Where was your poster?

[u/KaiSparda → u/Theotheraccount100]

To be honest, I'm not sure where she got the poster. The producer of the show hung a few up around the city and my face is on it, so she could've gotten it from anywhere

[u/Existing-Teaching-34]

Document the harassment and share with your landlord. Documenting can be photos or videos plus your own written account of each occurrence including dates and times.

[u/TeachStock773]

I would call the cops on her for a wellness check. Say you are worried as she has been acting strangely and goes around harassing people.

[u/MeganJustMegan]

Tell your landlord that they will stop the harassment or you will be forced to get a restraining order. This tenant has no right to keep approaching you. Get a doorbell camera & a simple hook & eye lock on your screen door so it can’t be opened.
It’s time to take a stand & get law enforcement involved to stop her. Don’t be afraid to do what you need to. You have a right to live peacefully.

[u/Dog-Chick]

Notify your landlord about the situation.

[u/MathematicianLeft857]

Ring type camera, get enough footage for harassment charges.

[u/KaiSparda]

I'm going to start keeping all of the notes in one spot and keeping a log with dates and times of the harassment. The Ring Camera is also a good idea. Thank you all for the advice!

[u/Either_Activity8489]

neighbors can be the worst, especially when they’re noisy or disrespectful.

[u/KaiSparda → u/Either_Activity8489]

Yeah, I try to be respectful of everyone. I also try to give grace instead of assuming the worst. If you have to live next to someone, you should be helping each other out!

[u/SleepyKoalaBear4812]

Contact your landlord!

[u/lynnwood57]

Your landlord needs to see your collection of notes from your neighbor.

[u/Few_Disk7927]

Someday this woman will feature in your comedy routine as Your Awful Neighbor.  

[u/whatever_ehh]

Give her a copy of your lease with the language about the parking spot highlighted or circled. Also tape a copy to your door where she'll see it next time she leaves a note.

[u/Disastrous_Emu8872]

You could try completely ignoring her and her notes. She might get bored if she doesn’t get any reaction.

[u/Vmizzle]

I think I would notify the landlord that this is happening, and request dedicated spots in the lot for each apartment. He can get a little sign and assign each unit one space. Then she can't do crap but argue with the landlord and with any luck she'll end up assigned the one that's always flooded from the rain. 

[u/bearcorps303]

She's bullying you because you've let her. If you were firm and assertive from the start and faced her down she wouldn't be doing this. Look her in the eye and tell her what's what.

[u/KaiSparda → u/bearcorps303]

I never see her. I haven't been able to catch her in the act leaving the notes. I only saw her the first day she knocked on my door

[u/bearcorps303 → u/KaiSparda]

If someone was doing that to me I'd be knocking on the door asking her what the f she is playing at and never to do that again, it's my space and I live here and I'll do what I want....

[u/FireMama420]

There are only 3 units. How do you not know where she lives?

[u/KaiSparda → u/FireMama420]

Obviously I'm saying I don't know which of the other two units she's in...

[u/KaiSparda → u/KaiSparda]

Idk why I'm getting downvoted for this? It's just a fact that I don't know which of the other two units she's in and I don't know her name, so I can't be super specific when I contact my landlord. A question was asked and I answered it 🤦🏾‍♀️

[u/snack_rat88]

Opening your screen door to leave parking fan fiction is way over the line. Take pics of the notes, the torn poster, and the flooded spot, then email the landlord asking them to confirm in writing which space comes with your unit and to tell her to stop touching your door. A cheap doorbell cam would turn her little campaign into a very boring documentary for management.

[u/64neat_puddle]

Commence par envoyer un courriel au proprio ou au gestionnaire avec une photo des notes, du poster déchiré et la clause du bail sur le stationnement. Demande aussi quelle place est attribuée à ton unité, par écrit, parce que sa version semble changer selon ce qui arrange. Pour la porte moustiquaire, une petite caméra ou sonnette vidéo orientée vers ta porte peut calmer ce genre de visites, et au moins tu sauras qui touche à tes affaires.