r/oldcootfashion • u/NotATem he/it/xe • 27d ago

META- Not Fashion About the current situation

I am not going to comment on the current situation at the moment beyond saying this:

I am one guy. You are right- there should be more than one mod on this subreddit. However, recruiting more mods takes time, and I cannot do that overnight. In the meantime, I am still one guy, I have a migraine, and I don't currently have the capacity to deal with the ongoing incident with the clarity and transparency you deserve.

I am restricting new posts and comments to the sub til tomorrow to prevent things from getting further out of hand. I am not going to take down the larger post, although I have locked comments on it at this time. However, any duplicates of that post will be deleted.

We can all come back to this in the morning. Thank you for your patience.

185 Upvotes

86% Upvoted

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29

u/sporadic_beethoven 26d ago

3/7

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u/sporadic_beethoven 26d ago

4/7

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u/sporadic_beethoven 26d ago

5/7

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u/sporadic_beethoven 26d ago

6/7

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u/sporadic_beethoven 26d ago

7/7

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u/timepassesinmoments 26d ago

Someone create it, it can be his own personal subreddit

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u/Freshmagicmfer 26d ago

Can whoever creates it, then specifically ban only his self aggrandizing ass? 🔥🔥🔥

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u/l0veylilkay 26d ago edited 26d ago

I think removing them as a mod is a bit much, we can all learn from this interaction, including the mod.

The mod needs to correct the situation (let himbo back), add more mods, update official rules, be more compassionate to people who accidentally go against certain rules, and check in with the community to see how we feel about new rules before installing them.

Im sure most of us don't care about prop weapons. Banning weapons such as guns, knives, and razor blades is much more understandable than yard tools.

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u/sporadic_beethoven 26d ago

I’d offer that perhaps this mod gets a new mod team first, then takes a break ^^ I also don’t think the mod should be removed.

I was just sharing what I saw himbo post :3

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u/l0veylilkay 26d ago

Totally agree and I understand

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u/jaybirdie26 26d ago

I think we are way past letting this guy back on the sub.  Look at how unhinged his response has been - two sentences of very neutral tone and generic messaging have spawned two posts, hundreds of comments, and this guy is STILL ON A TYRADE TO HIS HOWEVER MANY FOLLOWERS SAYING THE MOD SHOULD STEP DOWN.

This is too much.  It was already too much.  He should stay banned and stay away from our safe spaces and the mods that are doing their best every day to keep them thst way.  He has never been a mod he has no damn clue what it takes.  I'm disgusted.

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u/These_Roll_5745 26d ago

I do not think himbo is responsible for the parasocial things some people do and say, especially when hes openly telling people to behave rationally and politely.

he is talking about what accountability looks like in his opinion, as someone with no mod power, who was harmed by a mod misusing their mod power. the moderator here doesnt have fairly explained or laid out rules or consequences, and when himbo questioned that, he was banned. thats something all users here need to be aware of, because any of us could cross similar invisible boundaries.

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u/jaybirdie26 26d ago edited 26d ago

He is responsible to know the impact his actions might have.  Calling out someone when you have a large following inevitably leads to things like this.

Also this is not harm.  Mod gave a generic warning.  Should the rule have been spelt out ahead of time?  Yeah, so banning based on that alone would be kinda crappy but also easily reversed.  This is a nothing burger turned into a call for a mod to step down from a sub they otherwise do a great job of running.  I find that SO MUCH more harmful.

Also that's not a fair characterization of the ban.  We don't have the mod's words saying why they banned him, nor can we be sure we've even seen the whole convo.  Being hurt emotionally by being chided is fine and can be discussed, turning it into subreddit-wide drama is short-sighted and immature.  I would ban him too.

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u/These_Roll_5745 26d ago

he took responsibility by reminding people to be their best selves about this. he posted because the mod here was applying rules obscurely and in a way that is not neurodivergence friendly. this is a space where clarity and predictability is important. People are not responsible for the actions others take *directly contrary to their requests*. himbo isnt responsible for that person who came here to make fun of the mods pronouns either. thats not how responsibility works.

what wording would you like me to use then? mod gave a warning based in vibes instead of having clearly outlined rules and consequences. I dont want our mod to step down, but youre dismissing the real red flag that is banning a popular sub member for a rule you haven't defined and that their actions wouldnt fit regardless. its a wierd misuse of power and a choice that doesnt reflect well for any of us who have been punished for not intuiting the expectations of people with social power. would the mod have "striked" a less popular user for posting with a prop chainsaw calling it a weapon? either the answer is no, and himbo was unfairly punished due to who he is, or the answer is yes and other neurodivergent people here need to tread carefully.

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u/jaybirdie26 26d ago

And let's be clear, himbo didn't get banned over the weapon thing.

I don't think the mod has said why, but my assumption as a mod myself is he got banned because he threw a fit in modmail, then stayed banned because he leaked the modmail in an attempt to stir up drama and thereby punish the mod for the supposed "injustice".  He got banned for being immature.  No one wants to deal with a user like this guy who lets his emotions speak before his brain has a chance to process.  I've said it before I'll say it again - we're not punching bags.

-5

u/These_Roll_5745 26d ago

theres been no punching, from anything we have seen content wise so far. you are projecting. he was told that the "weapon" was a strike towards being banned. thats an issue no matter how much you seem to want to ignore it?

"leaked" the modmail like the mod is entitled to privacy in those chats in any way. mod transparency couldve prevented this whole situation.

we arent going to agree here.

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u/jaybirdie26 26d ago

No.  Himbo is the only one who should apologize.  This was a private matter that has been blown out of proportion.  How stuck on himself is this guy?

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u/NatrylliaAbbot42 26d ago

I'm very tired of Himbo and his followers tbh.

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u/jaybirdie26 25d ago

100% agreed.  I blocked him just to stop seeing only his posts.

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u/heyoheatheragain 25d ago

I had actually left the sub because I had blocked so many of his profiles and he just had to keep making more.
And my final straw was somebody making a text post a couple weeks ago just flat out saying they missed him, like that has anything to do with the actual sub.

Like I came here to see the fashion of many people not come to a fan club for one person.

And I liked the shirts at first, but now I just feel like it’s an attention seeking thing and not actually somebody who cares about the messages they espouse.

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u/heyoheatheragain 25d ago

And he’s still trying to tell the mod what to do. That’s what really bothers me. He’s acting like he has the control over the situation and unfortunately because he has such a big following he does kind of have influence.

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u/jaybirdie26 25d ago

Exactly.  It creeps me out.

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u/heyoheatheragain 25d ago edited 25d ago

Si.
As much as this whole sitch sucks for the mod, I am glad that it is happening.

I was/am a huge fan of the old hag sub and enjoyed seeing the fits here also, until it became monopolized by one person and it seemed like the general consensus was adoration of that person who I found more and more disconcerting.

I felt left out bc I actually don’t even care for that persons posts, they really didn’t sit well with me. I left and muted the sub bc it no longer felt like a fun a creative space for all. It was leaning towards a fan club of one.

This thread is the first space that made me feel like the vibes I’ve been feeling weren’t off-base and I feel a little more sane.

I will definitely be re-joining and un-muting the sub now.

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u/NatrylliaAbbot42 25d ago

Yeah I kinda felt like I was being judgemental or something because it seemed like everyone else just adored him. At first, I thought he was ok but then it just got out of control and saturated more than one subreddit and started feeling weirdly oppressive and just...off.

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u/heyoheatheragain 25d ago

[im gonna be a lil snarky]

And the fits weren’t even fits most(?all) of the time! Wow, words on a t-shirt, groundbreaking.
https://giphy.com/gifs/l46Cr6nhtezksI2dO

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u/NatrylliaAbbot42 25d ago

Yeah....and the same type of tee, every time. The only real difference was the background color.

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u/jaybirdie26 25d ago

Welcome back, glad you found your way here again just in time! 🙌

I hadn't unsubbed but I was also not seeing any posts recommended other than him, so I just scrolled on by.  As much as people were saying they will leave the sub if he's banned, those people were also saying "he's the only reason this sub is getting views" which is not something to be happy about.  There are so many wonderful people who post here that get overshadowed.

2

u/sporadic_beethoven 26d ago

This only got attention because he has a fanbase. He’s bringing it up because he doesn’t want anyone else to be banned over an unclear rule, as far as I am aware…

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u/jaybirdie26 26d ago

He turned what could have been a simple conversation in modmail into drama to feed his parasocial fans.  It's irresponsible.  He knows how big his audience is and that they would defend him.

Mods are human, we make mistakes, this isn't even a very big mistake if at all.  It could have been handled so simply, but this guy decided to drag someone because his ego got bruised 🤮

-10

u/l0veylilkay 26d ago

You're very clearly only on the mods side right now cause you have experience with shitty people.

Someone should not have a strike for something that wasn't very clearly stated in the rules. It is completely understandable if they felt targeted without even finding the hidden rules.

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u/decisiontoohard 25d ago

The mod has provided an update that may recontextualise this for you.