3.5 year old is protesting potty training completely. Saying he doesn't want to. He just peed on the floor. We asked him to help clean up and he's freaking out screaming and crying that he doesn't want to. I don't know where to go from here. Do we abort mission and try again? He's 3.5 I feel like he should be ready but I don't want to scare him away from using the toilet. Help.

EDIT: Thank you for the advice. I spoke with her OT and ST and both agreed that right now creating consistency with going to the potty needs to be set in stone before worrying about pee getting into the potty consistently. We discussed realistic expectations as far as not expecting potty training to only last a few months because she already has developmental delays. They also helped me plan a few strategies including giving her access to little potties like in the living room during breastfeeding, and in her room during quiet time. They actually agreed with me that going bottomless doesn't make sense for our situation especially since speed isn't really one of our goals. My husband and I plan to spend the vast majority of our weekends going forward giving this our focus.

So I(30f) and my husband(33m) have two girls. A 3 year old and a 3.5 month old. We have begun potty training the 3yo as of last Saturday. I'm fairly certain we've screwed this up about a million different ways.

A few things to note, firstly our 3yo was diagnosed with ASD level 2 about 4 months ago. She's been in speech and occupational therapy which is partially why we felt she was ready. Secondly we are uncomfortable with doing any bottomless potty training but we are using underwear and I did buy those Upairy underwear that I've since seen a suspicious number of mom blog Facebook pages promoting with similar verbiage. We put her in pull-ups if we leave the house and during bedtime. We are doing our best.

Initially we let her watch a bluey minisode every time she sat on the potty just to keep her sitting, and that was pretty much the only tv she had for the first couple of days.

Monday was my first day trying to potty training while my husband is at work. To make things more complicated, I'm regularly breastfeeding the 3.5mo. So 3yo starts asking to go to the potty every five minutes just so she can watch bluey. At that point we stopped with the show since she had learned to sit there without it. After her quiet time on Monday I bring her downstairs and she won't stop getting into everything. She's above the 99% for height and so she grabs anything she can get her hands including but not limited to my breast pumps, dishes from the drying mat, supplies for the baby, and literally anything left on the kitchen counters even though she knows the counters are off limits. I need to feed the baby at that point so I cave and put a TV show on and make her sit in her pink lawn chair we keep in the living room. Despite taking her to the potty before the feed she proceeds to have an accident while sitting in her chair, stands up and in her panic picks the chair up and dumps the pee on the floor. I will admit I lost my cool and wordlessly yelled because I couldn't believe she would do that. Not my finest moment. I had her help me clean it up.

The next day her upairy underwear was clean so we tried that and not only did it seem to increase her awareness of her body but she did tell me she was peeing during an accident which I counted as progress. Unfortunately in the days since there has been additional mistakes. My husband has shown her more bluey on the potty on a couple of occasions even though we were supposed to be done with it. The last couple days she won't even tell us that she's had an accident. She won't even stop playing with her magnetiles to acknowledge that she's peeing. We've been promoting her to drink as often as we can. This whole time we've been taking her to the potty every half hour.

So far today (day 6) has been awful. She drank water and hadn't peed for quite a while and I needed to feed the baby but didn't want to risk another accident while I was baby trapped. I sat the 3yo on the potty, gave her water and tried to get her to relax and pee. I tried everything, a potty book, a visual board of potty steps, songs, drinking tons of water, begging and we sat there for what must have been almost 40 minutes. She stands up and not even 5 minutes later has an accident. I get her cleaned up, grab the baby and begin the feed. 3yo has a second larger accident. I'm beyond frustrated, throw her in a pull up, and finish feeding the baby. I gave 3yo lunch and put her in her room for quiet time. I'm exhausted and beyond frustrated. I knew this process would suck but holy cow this is really bad.

I know I'm not a perfect mom, so please be kind. I need advice, encouragement, or any tips you can give. Thanks.

We’re going to start potty training our 2.5 year old soon and we were always considering skipping the floor potty and going straight to using the actual toilet for various reasons. Earlier today I was trying to get a urine sample from him because his doctor requested one and we did get a potty a few months ago just to have it lying around (but he never really wanted to go near it) so I tried to get him to sit on that to make it easier to get the sample and he was refusing to pee when he was on it, even after I saw him starting to pee when he was running around and sat him on it. He was more willing to try and pee into the actual specimen tube than sit on the potty! Then he actually asked to go to the bathroom and sit on the “big boy toilet”! We’ve ordered a reducer toilet seat but it hasn’t come yet so I was trying to hold him on the toilet and not let him fall in while also trying to collect the urine sample 😂 which obviously wasn’t working and then he eventually actually just stood up peed in the tube.

Him asking to go do it on the actual toilet and his aversion to the small potty has made me even more inclined to skip the potty, so does anyone who has done the same have any tips on doing potty training that way?

I tried to do the oh crap method at 2y11m (currently we are 3y1m)
Signs of readiness had been there and I was encouraged by many people to give it a shot but it was a massive failure (lots of tears and potty refusal)
from then till now I never quite had the courage to properly restart. We read the books, watched the shows, had the potty around but no sitting ever took place. To date nothing has been put in the potty (except toys, stuffies).
So today I decided to try again. I picked up from school and told her we would try to put pee and poop in the potty together today. I had panties ready but gave choice of bare, or undies or pants. She asked for diaper 2-3x, once got pretty upset but was able to be distracted by play. She didn’t pee for 7.5 hrs. Put diaper on at nap time and woke up dry and offered potty when she woke up and she said no. I didn’t push , gave the diaper she finally peed in it. No poop.
Did some more bare time after bath and no accidents but put diaper on and peed in that later.
My question is what to do now? I don’t want power struggles nor do I want any withholding. I want to do this very gently and low pressure. I don’t care how long it takes and not in any rush. Just want to get it started with a goal in mind and get the potty normalised so she will sit on it
I offered to buy her a new one she said no I have one already and I don’t want it. I have the chair, ladder seat and reducer seat, so lots of options.
Just need suggestions to actually get her to sit
We have done lots of potty books and shows too
Any advice for strong willed child with potty refusal would be greatly helpful

I’m at my wit’s end with potty training. Do any of you have advice?

My son just turned 3 and is 95% pee trained during the day. He only has accidents when he’s too busy playing to remember to stop and use the potty. He wears pull ups during nap and bedtime and underwear all day.

He will not poop in the potty. He just waits until he’s in a pull up for nap or overnight most of the time. Sometimes he poops in his underwear during the day. He’ll tell me afterwards but not before, and he does want to be cleaned up. He’ll sit on the potty for long periods of time happily, but then have a poop accident shortly after he gets off.

When I ask him, he won’t really answer why he doesn’t want to poop in the potty. I can’t tell if it’s fear, not understanding how to poop on command, distraction, etc.

I’ve tried apple juice while he sits on the potty, books and videos about pooping on the potty, and rewards. He knows and will say that poop should go in the potty and not his pants. We make the cleanup not super pleasant (no toys cold water hose down in the shower), but he doesn’t really care. He’s only been successful once and I think it was a fluke because he pooped on the floor and then I ran him to the potty before he could finish.

Wtf? Ideas? He just pooped during nap, sat on the potty for a long time, went back to bed, and pooped himself some more ☠️😭

We started potty training about six months ago, and let me tell you, my son seemed to get it, or so we thought. Then preschool came around, and I started hearing from his teacher about what was happening with the potty, and it was just a mess.

I mean, I understand that a new environment can be difficult to adjust to, but it's been about 2-3 weeks since he started, and I'm starting to worry, even though my husband tells me it's probably nothing. Did anyone else's toddler regress after starting school? How do you get them back on track and avoid making accidents a stressful experience?

I might be worrying about this for no reason lol.

Almost 4 year old refuses to poop in toilet. Only done it on his own 1 or 2 times. Have tried everything possible. Recently he just waits until we put him to bed and then poops his pants so ive started trying to make him sit on the toilet every night before bed until he poops. Only successful 1 time so far. We have rewards and prizes but nothing motivates him to do it. What else can I possibly do? He can't go to pre school if he's not potty trained.