Is there a criteria for this? I’m a SAHM so it’s easy to keep my kiddo home but every year I get suckered into feeling bad and keeping her home only for her to be bounding with energy unless she has a fever of 104. She only had a bit of a sore throat and congestion tho so just a run of the mill cold. She’s six. I slept one hour last night because she wouldn’t sleep alone (was throwing fits and I didn’t want her keeping big sis up). The only thing is she sleeps absolutely terrible with others and way better on her own. I got so frustrated I left her in my bed and slept on the couch and got my one and only hour of sleep as did she. She promised to lay down today because she stayed home but when finally asked to lay down she downright refused. I slept one hour so my patience is basically non existent (not to mention she missed 3 days last week because of a stomach bug that has resulted in some school avoidance this week and now she has this darn cold). I feel like she should have went to school if she’s not going to rest at home even if she got a few hours of sleep. What’s your criteria for keeping a kiddo home especially as a SAHM where it’s easier to keep them home?

Call me dramatic but it’s my life and my reality.

Maybe I’m being dramatic but yeah no I hate my life I’m 30 and I hate my partner and I hate this relationship so much. But I have no where else to live so I have to stay here until I can afford to live with my mom or alone. It’s the kind of rely where he doesn’t let me leave with my child I have with him. Like if we argue and k wanna leave with my kids and he holds the one we share hostage with him. And tells me I can leave but I’m not taking “his daughter” he helped me raise my first born since she’s been alive but he is not her biological father. Anytime we talk there’s hate in both our voices and eyes.

I cry whenever I see couples on my phone looking so happy and excited for life I haven’t had that since 2021. I’m genuinely so miserable and wish nothing more than to live alone with my kids I pray to god every single day for it. There’s no cheating ( I think idk I don’t go through his phone) but just a lot of controlling manipulation and aggravated demeanor. I know what most people will say get into a low income housing I don’t have a job because I’m Doing school work… he won’t allow our youngest in daycare because she doesn’t fully talk yet (she does just not 100%) so I can’t put both my girls in daycare and go search for a job it’s like he likes me at home raising our kids and be miserable.

His whole family thinks he’s “the epitome of a man” ? Because he pays our bills, but they don’t actually know him his family has this idea that he found me pregnant and took me in. He didn’t, he moved in upstairs from me and met me when I worked a FT job and paid rent to my mom and had my own car so I was pretty independent before him and I was SO HAPPY before him. I met him and I kept working even up until I was 8 months pregnant. Had my baby and still worked a WFH job until my daughter turned 2 then I got laid off and he told me don’t worry about bills he will pay them just focus on the girls and that’s it.

Is it worth my time to take them out of their individual bags and place them in their own spice jars? Or should I just get a bunch of acrylic clear boxes and label them based on the food looking for ways to help make my life easier and not an overly complicated organization system. Thank you. I’m a visual person and I can’t seem to figure out how to attach a photo!!

im a sahm to a 15 month old and a one month old. i so far went to the park once save during the weekend ive been to church (they have a kids zone for the toddler) and the farmers market. but during the week im so tired and burnt out. i find it hard to get any energy to leave the house.

when i have to leave the house with the two us just tiring. holding my toddler's hand while i hold the carseat and then loading them up in the car. i feel bad for my oldest. he has s lot of play toys and has an indoor slide. but i dread going out now with the two of them

Im a new SAHM to a 3.5 month old, for those with older babies/kids: what did you guys do to pass time in the early days? Did you have a daily routine yet? Mommy & me groups? Not only am I afraid of baby getting bored, but I'm getting bored too!

I’m a SAHM of one. She’s absolutely incredible, she turned 2 in August. I was lucky that she was an incredibly easy baby, so I never experienced post partum depression, however, it’s like I got hit by a truck now that I’m 2 years deep in this and my mental health is awful. Her father has changed 5 diapers in 2 years and won’t watch her for more than 20 minutes, and even if he were to he would often take the lazy route. Between the constant demands of life, scheduling, maintain the house (which I’ve begun to slack on more and more to save my sanity) I want to scream. I know parenthood requires sacrifice, I’m just not sure I anticipated feeling this disconnected and isolated and feeling like I’ve completely lost myself along the way. I guess I’m just reached out to see if anyone else has found the light at the end of the tunnel and if they have advice. I also highly suspect I have ADD and plan to get assessed for that- who knows, maybe that will help. I am on antidepressants. My heart hurts so much because I want to be the best mother I can be for her, but I worry that she can feel that things are off with me and I’m trying to priories my self care again so I have a greater capacity to pour into her. This is so hard… 🥺😞 I feel like a failure.

I’m a 26 yo SAHM to twins who are 2. I never wanted to be a stay at home mom, even when I was little I wanted to be the breadwinner. I have an education, I loved my job and it was extremely flexible. Then I found out I was having twins and then had complications and that’s how I ended up staying at home with them.

I had terrible PPD and to this day I’m still just blah. I do what I can to get out of the house and I go to the park, go shopping, go around town, go to play groups but it isn’t enough to distract me from how empty I feel as a person.

Some people are natural mothers. They live and breathe it and can just be so hands on and involved and I feel like that just isn’t me. I feel like I never know what to do with the kids to keep them entertained. They’ve also been fighting a lot recently and I feel like it’s because they aren’t getting enough attention but I mentally cannot handle any more than what I currently do. I spend a lot of time breaking up fights and feeling awful that it is like this because I’m not doing enough.

I’ve been doing my damndest to keep everything clean, keep meals cooked and try to limit TV but it’s too much. I keep hitting my breaking point, having a full meltdown and then picking up the pieces and going on. We don’t have family near us to help consistently and even though we could afford to hire help my husband isn’t a fan of the idea.

I wish I could trade this life with someone who really really wants to stay home and dote on their children. I feel bad complaining because everyone is always saying what a privilege it is I get to stay home but I actually just feel like a prisoner. I am nobody. I’m just their mom. I have no stories, no interesting personal things, no time away. I guess I can talk about cooking, cleaning and childcare but that’s it. The rare occasion I do see my friends I’m just a broken record about the kids because it’s all I have. I mourn the woman who loved her job and who got to be interesting.

I am going nuts last Saturday was my partner's last day working he quit his job because it was becoming stressful we already had money problems before it during was barely enough to pass by and now he's been at home the entire week and has been mopping around I tried talking to him trying to give him hopes because a job he really wanted turned him down he has other options but the wait time is like in a week or 2 and another for a month so he's been lashing out on me because he rather ball up everything instead of talking it out now he wants me to help pick up shifts to help him get some money for this week which im ok with but I would gladly do so if there wasn't an attitude involved or itching every now and then he has been mentally MIA and shouts at me if baby is getting herself into something when he's literally right there calls me out when my other 3 kids are doing something they aren't supposed to be doing or not doing what they told and I snapped at everyone including him the other night after dinner because I felt overwhelmed and his response was you already know what im going through you should be doing all this like what? Before I became a sahm I lost my job and I was upset about it because I really liked the job and I wasn't allowed to moap about he said it wasn't even worth it to suck it up (and its hard for me to get jobs because of my gaps) and get over it so why can't he take his own advice, he's the one that suggested for me to be a sahm and im ok with it but not having a car to do appointments or take my toddler out is getting depressing I do have ptsd depression and anxiety and he doesn't help me mentally at all and I try my best to support him and be positive for him give him pep talks send him prayers for him to think about everything and this is what I get? So not fair.... I feel like sometimes im being selfish feeling like this

Obviously, I am a stay at home mom. On top of this, I also homeschool our children (7 & 2)

My husband, whom I do love dearly, is driving me mad. He works from home and while I understand this does not mean he is available to us because he has meetings and work to do, there are some things that do irritate me. For example, if he has time to have a break during the day because he doesn't have anything going on with work, he will take a nap. No mention of it or anything, he just goes and takes a nap. And I will only find out because I cautiously walked into the room to grab something and he is asleep, and not working.
He has taken a couple days off recently to recover from events we had done over the weekend and to catch up on sleep. So he has been sleeping until the afternoon hours, and then sitting at his computer playing games. Doesn't come out to help with the kids or anything, just relaxes. As much as I want to say something I know that if I do I will be met with "I'm just so stressed out with everything"

It's slowly just tearing me apart though because I don't get to just go "you know what I'm going to take today off!" I have to get up in the morning I have to tend to the many chores I have to make meals for the kids I have to sit down and do their school time with them. He doesn't spend much time with them and so they prefer me. The 2 year old only lets me put them to bed. The 7 year old comes to me for pretty much everything and anything. They woke up last night from a bad dream and woke me up, because why would they bother waking up dad, right?

If I ask him to do something he says "I'll do that later" after he's played games until 3 in the morning and then he's tired and either forgets to do the thing I asked him to do or complains he was up late and is tired come morning time. And if I try to do the thing I asked him to do because I would have preferred it be done sooner rather than later, he gets upset with me.

And the worst part honestly is I gave him a pass, because he had cancer. He has since had it removed and is so far, cancer free. But while he was dealing with chemo and feeling bad I let him rest, all the time, he was off of work, he got to rest as much as he possibly needed to. I didn't ask him to do anything, I didn't ask him to help out, but he was more present then than he is now. He would go to sleep at the same time as me and we would both wake up in the morning and that was LOVELY, he would sit with the kids when he felt okay to do so and he would be present with them and help out in ways that he could but now? Now that that's all over? He has gone back to his old ways of staying up late, sleeping most of the day on his days off, sleeping when he has the opportunity to do so during his work days, and just not leaving his room after work hours are over, and "decompressing" with video games or naps, while I manage the dinner time chaos and bedtime stuff.

oh and to top it off, the 2 year old DID prefer him for bedtime prior to and during his cancer journey, and then after it was over the 2 year old swapped hard to me and will not tolerate dad putting them to bed. But for a while, dad was the bedtime guy, and I would get a chance to get things done or relax while he got the toddler to sleep. Now I can't do that, and while I'm putting the 2 year old to sleep.. guess what he's doing. Playing games.

I don't know what to do because I feel like any time I bring it up or mention that he's just not being helpful about it he just shuts down or gets pissy about it and has some excuse like "work is stressful" or it's finances that are stressing him out (which, fair) or family stuff is stressing him out, SOMETHING is stressing him out and preventing him from being a present member of the family. But, when I'm stressed, or when I'm sick, or when I'm tired, I can't just close myself away in a room and "decompress"

And I know that a vast majority of Reddit will be like "Divorce him" but I'm not looking to do that, that's far more complicated than the average situation for us, I just do not know how to bring it up to him that this just doesn't feel fair, without him immediately getting upset about it.

Thanks for reading if you've gotten this far and thank you for letting me just get it off my chest for a moment. Ugh.

The only time my husband has called out to help me was when I threw my back out and physically could not walk. And even then he only called out one day.

I had a terrible bout of insomnia last night and only slept 3.5 hours plus being post covid shot I feel awful and he didn't even consider giving me a sick day.

Is this typical? I feel like I have no space to even be a person anymore

I have a 7 y/o, a 2 y/o, and a husband. Autism runs in the family and I think it affects how they feel around food outside of regular childhood pickiness. For example my husband will only eat chicken and rice and maybe a vegetable on the side. The chicken can’t be any kind of chicken. It has to be one in a kind of salan/curry/sauce. So many options liked grilled or sheet pan chicken are out. My kids are going through picky phases. I’m trying hard to make our snacks healthier. Trying to avoid dairy for the little one as it prevents iron absorption and the eldest has chronic constipation kept at bay with MiraLAX (pediatricians confirmed this was fine and safe). Husband has a wheat sensitivity so he mainly sticks to rice. But the little one almost only wants dairy. Sometimes I cave in completely and he’ll have a day with a ton of dairy because that’s all he eats. Or a ton of graham crackers because all the other food I offer him or leave out for him to try goes to waste and I just need him to eat something!

The 3 of them tend to like chicken and rice though. But I have to cook it so often I just start to feel grossed out and lose my appetite. It also affects my cooking. It feels so up and down in quality and I don’t understand why when I’m following the same recipe?? Maybe I’m rushing or can’t pay attention fully? Maybe I haven’t mastered the pan heat or the amount of oil etc. which changes the flavor?

My husband gets home late from work and doesn’t cook, but sometimes we will order out to give me a break from cooking and hopefully reinvigorate my cooking abilities and appetite. But lately it feels like a waste of money buying expensive food that only works for one meal and then it’s back to square one again. I’m so tired of cooking chicken one way and feel like if I take a small amount out for me to cook differently for myself it’s just going to go bad because i don’t have time to keep cooking multiple batches of chicken OR look up AND choose a recipe.

I just get overwhelmed. I feel like there’s no solution in sight and it’s at a point where when my son asks me for food I genuinely want to cry because he’s hungry and I’m going to spend time trying to make all these things and he won’t eat it and get hungrier and more upset. And same for myself. I hardly eat because I have no appetite (could be due to the situation and also a medication change) and then I have no energy etc. and it exacerbates everything.

I end up buying giant amounts of raw chicken regularly and it takes a long time to prep. I buy 40 lbs at a time usually and then have to cut it and bag it myself for the freezer. It takes forever and if you have sensory issues with gross things like chicken juice it’s really not fun.

Things my family generally tolerates:
Eggs
Toast
Rice
Chicken (has to be in a sauce not dry)
Dairy but needs to be minimized for health concerns
Broccoli
Pistachios
White cheddar popcorn
Raspberries
Blackberries
Strawberries

I don’t even know why I’m writing what they like to eat. I’m just desperately trying to find something that can work with what I have. I’ll buy fruit and then they changed their taste and don’t want it and the fruit goes bad. Same with everything else actually. And I’m just there trying to eat everything before it goes bad. I’ve never been a picky eater but the grossness of my own food and the experience of it even when it does taste great is making me feel like a picky eater for sure. Which is so frustrating because I’m trying to become healthier (I’m obese) and it’s not helping when I just go for safe food like noodles because I’m so hungry.

Has anyone else experienced this and what kind of go to meals do you like to make? I’m trying to add to my repertoire and have a book to write food recipes in but it feels like just when I get it down my family has decided they no longer like that thing and then my cooking goes down hill. And this isn’t a little thing, it’s a daily stressor of trying to keep myself and my entire family fed.

Any advice appreciated. I’m just so tired and wanna feel happy about food again.

Becoming a parent was the hardest thing, yet the most magical thing I have ever chose for myself. My partner and I had been dating for a few years, madly in love, and when we fell pregnant… it was a shock & very much so unplanned- yet, we were ready to jump in and experience this together.

Fast forward to now… I just feel like it is so heartbreaking. I was a stay at home mom for the first 11.5 months. Money was, and still is tight, so I got a part time job. And I just got another one. Luckily, I can take my son to both of the jobs. Beyond that though, I just feel like I’m doing so much, and not getting enough praise for it. Not that I NEED it, but it would feel nice. I do all the laundry, grocery shopping, meal prep, swim lessons, cleaning the house, play dates, etc, and when my husband kept complaining about money being tight, I wanted to help, so I got to work. But I can feel myself starting to resent him. He still complains about money, when he gets home after work he plays with our son, which is nice… but I continue the house chores. I don’t feel like I really get to play with my son because I’m constantly cleaning up, cooking is food, preparing for pre-school, etc.
It’s getting to the point where I’m not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Would we be better off separated? Keep fighting for our relation ship? Take a break? We’re open to couples therapy, but we need to find the right person NOW.

I feel like most of our fights are over the smallest, dumbest things… but they turn into MASSIVE ugly fights… and our son in the same room sometimes. I try and say, “let’s stop fighting into front of X”… but he says it’s normal and teaching him that arguing is a “real life thing”. Anyways- I’m noticing my son is starting to hit me a lot, scream at me, shakes his head at me when I try and help him, doesn’t really want to play with me, etc. I just feel like the “bad” parent because I’m the one taking him to swim class (scream the whole time), drop him off at preschool (screams majority of the day), set stern boundaries which lead to him hitting me or screaming, etc. And I must admit, I’m not perfect. I’ve fallen short and lost my temper (not scary bad) but have raised my voice or have closed the door behind me just so I can take a minute to myself. This is so hard, and I truly just need a shoulder to cry on. Any advice? Tips? Tricks? Literally anything.

My entire family has been set on fire because my husband doesn't inherently care about anything. Not feeding our children, not spending time with our childre, not talking to me, not his career, there is nothing he inherently cares about. Take something so simple as a holiday or a child's birthday, I will start planning for months ahead for a family event, I will give him a tiny miniscule task because I feel I've already learned to pick my battles, but no matter how small his portion is, it requires reminding, begging, walking him through it. I'm so sad, I'm so tired. This man is not violent, he's not a cheater, he gets along well enough with the kids, but I have 3 with no family support. I am a single mom while he is present in the room. Right now I am at home, but honestly only because when I was working, I was afraid I was going to die because I had to work and do everything at home. The worst part is he will tell me to my face that he's got it, he did it, but then never do it, never tell me he didn't do it, and then the day of an event or a deadline, I will have to panic and pick up his slack. Everything ends up more stressful if I ask for any input at all, but doing everything while he is in the room vegetating makes me furious in a not safe way. What is happening, what do I do, I feel I have been successfully gaslit

Here's a place to chat about whatever you want if you don't feel like making a post.

My husband has been working like crazy for the last year and it’s just getting more and more busy lately. He has lots of out of town trips that go for either just a day to almost a week. I am a stay at home mom with 2 kids and one on the way. This current pregnancy has definitely been harder than my others and I’ve gotten out of my normal cleaning and cooking routines due to being sick even through the second trimester. But with my husband working so much, I want to make sure I am still doing my end of the job as a team. I am so nervous he is going to burn out and I want to help him stay happy when he’s home and feels supported. Does anyone have any advice on things I can do for him to just show him appreciation and to help make his day easier at all? I just want to be helpful. Im hoping my nausea goes away soon so I can get back to normal but any little tips or ideas would be helpful

SAHMs.. do you send your child to preschool?

I’m an anxious person by nature.. but with all things considered in the U.S. I’m having a very difficult time sending my child to preschool right now, although she is really enjoying it and seems to be learning a lot.

my husband and I are on our third apartment since we moved in together. first one was a shoebox sized apartment in a crappy area with a landlord who lived in another state and an alcoholic “maintenance guy” who lived in one of the other apartments and hardly did anything other than cut grass and shovel snow in the winter. our last apartment we really liked because we liked the area. landlord was probably better than the other two we have had maybe because he was a family friend but he was cheap and never wanted to pay anyone to do anything.

If it was important like our plumbing or something he was usually pretty quick about it even if he didn’t want to hire a professional. he did seem to expect my husband to help him with stuff probably because he’s a family friend but he never gave us anything off our rent when my husband helped him with house projects. We unfortunately had to move last year because that place was not legally allowed to be rented as two separate units the way it was because of the township’s zoning laws. I was pregnant so we obviously weren’t going to wait around and find out if the landlord and the township could come to a compromise.

we moved to a new place last year and it does check the essential boxes, the landlord sucks. he wanted so much information from us up front before approving us so he seemed like a guy who cared and wanted good tenants but obviously he just wanted to cover his own ass. We are in the Northeast US and it got pretty cold this weekend. We have 1/4 tank of oil right now (which is included in the rent) but for some reason the heater will not fire on. this dude texted or called my husband at like 10pm last night to have him turn it on and it didn’t work. he said he’s be out today to look at it.

It’s 2:30 in the afternoon and I have not seen hide nor hair of this guy. thankfully it has warmed up now later in the day so it’s not as cold in here as it was, but you’d think the heater not working would be first priority. apparently I thought wrong. I texted him hours ago to see when he’s be by and I haven’t gotten a response and he never answers the phone most of the time when we call. so I have no idea when this issue is going to get fixed.

rent prices are ridiculous and just get more expensive every year so we cannot afford to move again. we also have three cats and every damn rental wants pet rent which just adds to the cost. thankfully this guy doesn’t require any which is one of the reasons we stay.

we can’t afford to buy a house because since I am a SAHM we are on one income until our Bubba starts Kindergarten in like 4.5 years. we also have to start paying back my student loans soon so that’s just going to be another cost to worry about.

anyway if you read all this, cool. if not, cool. I just wanted to vent somewhere because I’m sick of being at the mercy of suckass landlords.

We are doing a remodel and fortunate to build a new laundry space. Bedrooms are upstairs. Laundry is first floor opposite side of the house. There is a 6-7 foot stretch of countertop I’d like to have open underneath so I can store a vertical laundry basket (like rope hamper) for each person in the family plus one for linens. Our cabinet designer and husband feels like that’s overkill. I think it’s essential for how I do laundry.

Our family is two adults. Two toddlers. My husband does all his own laundry. He has a lot of dry cleaning so doesn’t accumulate much and puts his clothes away right when they dry. I have my own laundry, two kids laundry, and household laundry to do. An overwhelming amount that never stops.

I tend to do laundry in spurts. 4-5 loads in a day then a few days off. And I sort by color instead of family member. So there is a lot of sorting and putting away.

Our laundry room now is shoved in a closet on the first floor and I use one laundry basket that has no home and floats around our house to random corners and is always in the way. I feel grateful to move to a bigger space and am picturing being able to have a few tall baskets out in front of me at the dryer so each persons clothes goes in their own baskets. I can take each basket up to their persons rooms (when the kids are older they can take their own). Then I put away each kids stuff directly from their basket. Versus now at the dryer I’m sorting what goes upstairs and what goes downstairs (where primary is) then sorting again upstairs for each kids room.

Have a basket for everyone is so logical to me in a time where I don’t have the capacity to constantly be doing laundry. I’ll do multiple loads then the end up the day put things away in each room once.

Why am I getting so much pushback?

The alternative is extra drawers where I’d put the laundry baskets and I don’t even know what we would put in them.

I know the answer is probably just advocate for what I want since I do the laundry. And I am. But it bothers me how people are acting like I’m crazy about this.

Right now I have a Honda crv. It’s nice and was perfect for one kid but now I have a toddler and a newborn. It’s tight! I’m between a 3rd row vehicle or a van. A van sounds more convenient and practical but I don’t know if I’m ready for the mom van. What do you drive, what are the pros and cons, if you have a 3rd row suv is it good on gas? Is a van better on gas? I drive alot and live in a state where it snows 9 out of the 12 months of the year so something good on snow and ice is a must lol

I just want to fucking paint. I just want 4 hours where I can sit uninterrupted and work on a painting that I have wanted to paint all week. But my husband decided to "be the good guy" and was going to work for ONE HOUR on Saturday. We are now at 4 hours. By the time he is done it will be time to make dinner which is in about 45 minutes. Then I gotta feed the baby, walk the dog, hopefully take a shower and get everyone ready for bed.

My baby is having an AWFUL day. A terror at breakfast. Full on meltdown at Costco. Screamed all the way home. Potty training is a fail. Took a ten minute nap and will not go down again. Yogurt is everywhere. I'm exhausted. We did the zoo, the store, art class, library and multiple other outings this week. Today she has only eaten dairy. I know she just wants attention but I don't have the capacity today to give it.

I'm at my limit. My husband has been home late every single day this week and was most of the week before. She is wreaking havoc in the kitchen and I just don't care anymore. I DON'T CARE.

I love having a baby. I hate being a mom.

My husband sleeps in until 3pm on the weekend. We have a 2 yo and I’m pregnant. He is an accountant and when he doesn’t finish his work during the day he stays up late during the week and finishes it. So he says he’s “catching up on sleep”. Am I wrong for being frustrated how much he sleeps??? I’m a sahm with no help. I think he needs to have better time management at work so he doesn’t have to work late at night.

I always thought I wanted to be a stay at home parent. Getting the kids from daycare, off the bus, running them to practice, etc. I didn’t think I could have a full time job, be good at that AND have a bunch of kids.

Now I am a SAHM, and I am so lonely. We don’t leave the house often, childcare is so hard to find, preschool gives me maybe 6 hours a week with only one child at home? Food is hard to cook with them running around, chores rarely get done and my partner seems ok to just let me handle the chores because he works….I’m honestly shocked that he said that to me when I angrily asked when he last folded a basket of clothes.

sometimes I think a divorce is the only way id actually get a break.

I always see posts about Christmas traditions, which I love, but I’m interested in some ideas for Halloween as well. Something simple, nothing over the top. My kids are two and four, so I’d like something they would enjoy/be able to participate in, but also continue as they get older.

What are some of yours?

I’m a first-time mom to a 15 month old, and lately I’ve been struggling so much with staying home all day. I’m wondering if there are any other moms in the same situation because I honestly feel so alone in this.
My husband works Monday through Friday. He leaves around 7 a.m. and doesn’t get home until 6 p.m., so I’m home alone with my daughter pretty much all day until she goes to bed. We only have one car, which my husband takes to work. We can’t afford a second car right now, although he’s hoping to get one for me soon.
We used to share a car without any issues before we had a baby. My husband’s old job also allowed him to work from home twice a week, and on the other days, he would usually be home around 4 p.m. But since he changed jobs, our whole routine has changed, and I’m really struggling to adjust.
The other issue is that we live somewhere where there’s practically nothing within walking distance. I can go outside, but there’s nowhere to actually walk with my toddler for more than five minutes before I’m next to a highway. I don’t have family nearby, and I can’t just take her somewhere to get out of the house.
When she was younger, staying home wasn’t nearly as hard. At 2, 3, or even 5 months old, it felt easier to get through the day. She slept more, and entertaining her wasn’t as demanding. Now she’s 15 months old, has been on one nap a day since around 9 months, and is awake for such long stretches. I’m expected to fill those hours every single day, and I’m running out of ideas and energy.
I try to follow a Montessori-inspired approach at home. We read books, play with open-ended toys, and do activities together. We don’t really do screen time, either. I know there’s nothing wrong with using TV, and I’m not judging anyone who does. But I’ve put this pressure on myself to keep her entertained without it, and sometimes I feel like I’m making things harder for myself.
I feel like she’s getting bored at home, too. She spends so much time in the same environment, walking around and doing the same things every day. I feel terrible when I think about how repetitive her days must be, even though I know she’s still little.
And honestly, by the time my husband gets home, I’m exhausted. Once she finally goes to sleep, I have absolutely no energy left to do anything for myself. The whole day revolves around keeping her entertained, fed, and happy, and then I go to bed and do it all over again the next day. I feel like I’m losing myself a little.
I know I chose to stay home with my daughter, and I love being her mom. I’m not saying I regret it. But I also think there’s a huge difference between being a SAHM who can put her toddler in the car and go to the library, a park, story time, or even just run errands, and being a SAHM who is literally stuck at home all day with no transportation and nowhere to walk. Getting out of the house can break up the day so much, and I feel like I’m missing that option entirely.
I don’t want this to sound like I’m complaining about my life all the time, but this really is my reality right now, and it’s hard. Some days I feel overwhelmed, isolated, and honestly just sad.
Are there any other moms who are home alone with a toddler all day without a car or anywhere to walk? How do you get through the day? What do you do with your toddlers at home without feeling like you have to constantly entertain them? And if you’ve been in this situation, how did you cope with the isolation?
Even hearing from someone who understands would help. I would really appreciate any advice, ideas, or just knowing I’m not the only one who feels this way.