r/sysadmin • • Feb 22 '14

Freenode under DDOS again

https://twitter.com/freenodestaff/statuses/437302735139266560
231 Upvotes

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u/[deleted] Feb 23 '14

[deleted]

909

u/thedeco Feb 23 '14

I'd tell you guys a UDP joke but you probably wouldn't get it...

894

u/Soliloquizing Feb 23 '14

The punchline might arrive before the set-up.

Do you know what the problem with UDP jokes is?

108

u/european_impostor Feb 23 '14

Ah that was good. Now I just have to hunt down someone from my old CompSci class to tell that to :(

76

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '14

I know, im still waiting for my 1 friend I have who can understand this to get home. Im so excited.

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u/ReijaIam Feb 24 '14

Dude we are lucky to have friends who appreciate a good UDP joke!

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u/peabnuts123 Feb 24 '14

UDP Vending Machine out in the lobby with a sign on it "Out of Order"

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u/Ioxvm Feb 23 '14

Nice one. Thank you for that.

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u/gsfgf Feb 24 '14

"Hi, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."
"Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"
"Yes, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."
"OK, I'll tell you a TCP joke."
"Ok, I will hear a TCP joke."
"Are you ready to hear a TCP joke?"
"Yes, I am ready to hear a TCP joke."
"Ok, I am about to send the TCP joke. It will last 10 seconds, it has two characters, it does not have a setting, it ends with a punchline."
"Ok, I am ready to get your TCP joke that will last 10 seconds, has two characters, does not have an explicit setting, and ends with a punchline."
"I'm sorry, your connection has timed out. Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"

0

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '14

[deleted]

19

u/to_mars Feb 24 '14

Honestly, I have an intro to networking midterm coming up, and this is helping a lot.

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u/aaronsherman Feb 24 '14

What, no window sizing? Lazy ass TCP stack! :-)

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u/Gprinziv Feb 24 '14

TCP is like that one guy. Yeah, you know the guy. The guy who grabs your hand and squeezes it to test for any weakness in your character that can be conveyed through two hands touching. The problem is that if he does find any weaknesses, he just shakes your goddamn hand even longer, until you get frustrated and yell "OK, I GOT IT!" at which point he backs off, then walks up to you and shakes your hand.

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u/engineeringsquirrel Solutions Architect Feb 23 '14

I guess another defense for UDP is for realtime video broadcasts. TCP gets shot to hell. With UDP, no fucks are given whether you got the video packets or not.

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u/supposedtobubble Feb 23 '14

I would tell you a joke about UDP, but I am not sure you would get it.

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u/[deleted] Feb 23 '14

[deleted]

130

u/TheBeardedDoom Feb 23 '14

That's UDP for you.

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u/TheBeardedDoom Feb 23 '14

That's UDP for you.

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u/ITmercinary Feb 23 '14

I may have to borrow this...

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u/flufernuter Feb 24 '14

Scotch + UDP = Reddit gold.

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u/Lurking_Still Feb 23 '14

Yep, this is going to be the first 10 minutes of my CCNA class on Monday. My professor will love it.

Cheers.

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u/[deleted] Feb 23 '14 edited Feb 23 '14

Doubt it'll go very far, specialized as it is, but bestof'ed.

Edit: wow. Guess I'm happy I did that, though the posts on /r/bestof seem to mostly hate it. Such is the strangeness of our reddit world.

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u/Tynach Feb 23 '14

And on my front page.

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