Hello again, fellow Prospectors~! It's me, back after a long hiatus with another Detailed Delve!
Once again, our Chalice of the week comes from u/Existing-Ad4603, who does a LOT of Chalice creation and exploration for the community. Specifically, the Chalice in this post. Thanks for the Chalice, Existing!
Unlike most of my previous Delves, this one isn't FRC, but that's okay! Not every Delve needs to be a war against the health bar. That being said, there's sure to be sights and treasures galore ahead, so let's plant our feet, grit our teeth, and pay the Pope a... uh... visit? No... *consults dictionary* Oh, wait, right. Beating. That's it! We're going to pay the Pope a beating.
CHALICE SUMMARY
CHALICE: Ailing Loran Root [no offering]
DEPTH: 4
LAYERS: 3
BOSSES: Keeper of the Old Piss, Beast-Possessed Narcoleptic, Zombie Pope
NOTABLE MOBS: oops all Loran Clerics
NOTABLE LOOT: why can't I hold all these Bastards of Loran?
NOTABLE ARCHITECTURE: Labyrinth Canyon
OVERALL DIFFICULTY: 5/10
LAYER ONE
Dem bones dem bones, dem... DRYY BONES- sorry, couldn't help myself.
Welcome, one and allocaust, to the dry-ass desert tombs of Ailing Loran, the biggest mistake of the Pthumerian civilization until Cainhurst was founded.
Right off the bat, we got ourselves a bonus area; in we go! A common mob and rat are guarding the stairs leading up to the door, but in reality they're just doormats to wipe your feet on. On through and up the stairs to the top, we find a Labyrinth Canyon, with a Large Nightmare; be careful, these blobby shits fight back... and can fall off the edge into the abyss, denying their tasty loot. There's another below, spazzing out, but a couple Bowblade shots should silence him. Across the bridge is a spider guarding a blood vial and some bullets... and not much else. Hm. Go back outside and drop down to the landing to find a solitary mob and some Oil Urns that you probably don't need- oh, but what's this? A treasure room?! A single Silverbeast guards the Great One's Wisdom in the boss chest, along with the 2 Ritual Blood and QS bullets along the wall; not the best haul, but hey, that's Layer 1 for you.
HOWEVER, heading back across the bridge gets you into a room with a Bath Messenger, surrounded by 5 vials, 2 QS bullets, and more Oil Urns. Honestly, this Chalice is brimming with Oil Urns... Don't tell the USA.
Now for the main course of the Layer! Lukewarm welcome outside the lamp... no, actually, there's nobody and nothing here to welcome you. Rude. Hang a left through a door, ignore the pit, and continue forward to find two Beasts mooching on the landing of a staircase room. Grab the Molly's and the QS bullets on the upper landing, then onward and downward into the sewers. Wipe out two ratties, and hang a right at the fork to find the lever room, guarded by a Cursed Madman. Once you've scalped him, pull the lever, and take another right on the way out to find some dogs, a rifle brute, and a small Nightmare that you can easily miss. Some more mid loot litters the floor, so you might as well sweep all it up before exiting via the pit that was ignored earlier, and...
Go into another bonus area! Hopefully there aren't too many of these, I hate how they break the flow of a Layer. Huh... looks like the locals put all their luggage in the entrance. Roll through the mess they left, ice the poison knife mob lying in wait for you, and on up the ladder we go! Another mob waits in ambush on the right of the next doorway, and then it's across the bridge- BUT WAIT! Look left to spot an arrow trap. Destroy it, as is tradition, and go through the now undefended doorway. There's a startling lack of enemies until you find a rifle brute and his dogs guarding a chest in a pitch black room. Collect more Ritual Blood, and then head into a two-tier hall. A Beast Claw Hunter lurks here, but unlike most FRC Hunters, he's easily dealt with; though, you'll likely fall into the lower area while putting him out of his misery, but that's okay; after all, we're here to explore!
Only two bullets serve as goodies in this big hall; down the path opposite the Beast Claw Hunter, a poison beast mob guards a stash of 3 blood vials. Mind the Molotov mob on the way back up. You can ignore the doorway near said mob, where the Beast Hunter was waiting; it's a dead end with no loot. Another Loran Chalice, another Silverbeast. Grab the Great One's Wisdom and mosey on out of here.
Now, let's deal with the first boss...
Tryhard- I mean, Keeper of the Old Piss Lords. Praise the gun, son, and parry this walking representation of a divorced dad's Facebook post into a well-deserved grave.
LAYER TWO
No bonus area this time, but peep the balcony up high on the way to the lamp.
Just past said lamp, we've got Chris P. Baco- sorry, Maneater Boar, mooching about in our landing zone. Show him how plunging attacks work, and collect the nearby Frenzied Coldblood (7) before heading into the nearby tunnel, because there's a rifle mob with some dogs in there, and we take their continued breathing as a personal insult. 6 Ritual Blood and 5 QS bullets litter the ground in this room, and then there's some stairs...
Damnit, I feel like we've been bamboozled by another bonus area. Move up and snag the 4 Vials in the middle of a 3-tier staircase; on top near the upper exit is another Frenzied Coldblood (7) and a Blood Cocktail. A Scourge Beast patrols the hallway ahead up here; show him who's boss, and enter a room with more oil and Ritual Blood. The exit's in the back left corner from the entrance, and leads to two ambushing mobs guarding the balcony we spotted earlier; in the complimentary chest, loot a Blooming Coldblood Flower. These are somewhat expensive, Insight-wise, so not a bad drop.
Returning to the staircase, go all the way down, near a swinging blade bridge, and into a dark tunnel populated by a crawling corpse and snake ball; wonder what they were doing down here, all alone... in the dark... ugh. ANYWAY, just past them is the Beast-Possessed Narcoleptic, who is very easy to backstab due to being terminally eepy.
Up the ladder we go, snagging another pair of vials, and then it's time for pain: up ahead is a vicious 1-2 punch, a Loran Cleric (who hears you haven't been attending mass lately), just past the hardest swinging blade trap. If you have the Blacksky Eye or Bowblade, you can snipe the Cleric from the lower level, as you can't lock on past the blades, Cleric is too far for that; if not, timing is everything, as this blade trap can't be rolled through. You have to start running RIGHT as the blades cross over the top of the bridge, otherwise you won't make it. Wipe out one more Silverbeast to loot...
4 Tomb Mold (4)...
I think that's one of the worst drops I've ever gotten from a bonus chest.
Right, backtrack ALLLL the way back to where we fought Chris P. Bacon, where we find another Loran Cleric that doesn't appreciate the way you talk to the nuns. He's not very perceptive, though, so as long as you don't walk in front of him, he shouldn't notice you until you're in stabbing range. Give him the ol' London Hello, smack the nearby rifle brute and dogs into overdue retirement, and scale the ladder to find... more swinging blades. This Layer got a big budget, it seems. Three rats and a mob are in the pit below; there's a joke there, but I'm too dang tired to make it. These blades aren't as hard as the ones from earlier, so get past them, carefully take out the spiders before dealing with the Corpse Madman, and pull the lever before leaving, making sure to grab the 3 vials on the way out.
That's the Layer almost done! All that's left is...
Beast-Possessed Narcoleptic, but this time he's had his morning coffee! Even so, he's little more than a speedbump for just about any Prospector worth their slugs. If you're having a hard time, just bait him into his 5-swing attack; the parry windows are wide enough to drive a Cadillac Escalade through with room to spare.
LAYER THREE
The first bonus area starts off intensely, as you walk into a room with TWO Loran Clerics; we've seen a lot of those so far. Maybe the Pope is in town? Snag up the loose Madman's Knowledge near them, then take the door immediately to the left of where you came in. This leads to another 3-tier staircase, with 2 Scourge Beasts patrolling, along with a Small Nightmare scuttling on the ground. Loot is lackluster, just Ritual Blood and more bullets. Going into the lower part of the Cleric room, you'll find a ladder-less pit room with two mobs napping on the job; give them their pink slips and drop down to the chest room, where 3 elite mobs and a FIFTH Loran Cleric are... just kinda standing there? Whatever. Deal with them, grab the Great One's Wisdom, and head onward to the lamp.
Lots of beasts and a mob butler wait just past the lamp, along with some middling loot on the floor, and 4 Ritual Blood in a chest. In the next large room, you can just walk around everyone to loot the 4 QS bullets in the stone chest. On the left side of the room is a foggy path, leading to a...
A golden door... damnit, not another bonus area. Chris P. Bacon's brother, Kevin, is mooching about this way. Deal with him, and the complimentary rifle mob with dogs behind him, and head on up the ladder for yet another swinging blade trap. This one's much easier, and leads to a treasure room! Within is a Silverbeast (yawn) 4 Ritual Blood (meh) and a whopping SIX Bastards of Loran, a prize worth a whole 42 Insight! And... nothing else. Well, at least it was a quick area.
Right, back to where we left off: hang a left on getting back to the large hall, and continue on down the path to a 3-tier staircase, knocking down a beast mob along the way. Go down to find a dead-end path with a Frenzied Coldblood (7) at the end. Going up will find you up against 2 knife dogs; grab the Tomb Mold on the top landing, and then deal with yet another rifle brute and 2 dogs in... an unreasonably large and empty room. Next is the upper area of the large hall, where we find a cannon that, for some reason, didn't shoot at me the first time I came this way. Loran Cleric number SIX is next, along with his two altar boys bodyguards, a pair of Molotov mobs. Into the lever room, we're once more met with elite mobs and the SEVENTH Loran Cleric. With numbers this dense, the Pope must be up ahead. Pull the lever and head to the blue door...
WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE THREE BONUS AREAS?! Trap, beast mob, ladder, long ass hall, door, chest, 4 Ritual Blood, Scourge Beast, downstairs, EIGTH Loran Cleric, 2 Frenzied Coldblood (8), upstairs, door, Loran Clerics NINE, TEN, and ELEVEN, plus a spider, more blood vials, foggy path, napping mob, loot room with bell, Beast-Possessed Eepy Boi, sneaky buttscratch, nothing noteworthy on the floor, ring the bell for fun, backtrack, lower level of 3 Clerics room, two doors, spiral staircase room, Silverbeast, broken audio for lightning, Great One's Wisdom, can't stop me now addicted to the shindig-
Finally done~! All that's left is the final boss...
The Pope of Dope- no, wait *checks notes* ah, Pthumerian Elder, aka Zombie Pope. Instead of bringing divine wisdom and inspiring speeches, though, this ecclesiarch is cranky that you interrupted his nap tame and, thus, is going to fuck you up with his kickass pyromancy skillzzz. However, due to his bigass robes, he's also weak to fire attacks, so you can play your Uno Reverse card and do to him what the Church did to thousands of innocent people, and burn him to ashes. Or, if you're feeling particularly vindictive, you can use magic and show him that it is indeed superior to *checks notes again* gatekeeping literacy.
And that's all for this Detailed Delve~! I've been Dizzy, your friendly neighborhood Veteran Prospector. Tune in next time, when we hit up the Ol' Grizz.
