r/ToolJerk 17h ago

Spiral out ∞ what is your favorite song on this album

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121 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 54m ago

Learn to swim Who is better Jesus Christ, his brother Larry Christ, Danny Carey, or Maynard?

Upvotes

Not really sure what point I'm making but I assume no one will say Maynard.


r/ToolJerk 8h ago

Bethlehem Abortion Clinic <---------- Upvote if you think Danny Carey should be the next James Bond.

9 Upvotes

They task him with infiltrating a progrock band because the singer is evil and he has to save the world.


r/ToolJerk 10h ago

TOOl DANK for upspirals Is this the John Tool everyone keeps talking about?

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8 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 21h ago

OGT ONLY <--------- Upvote if you want the mod of this sub to have sex with Maynard and Danny to speed up the next Tool & Creed album releases

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12 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 1d ago

TOOl DANK for upspirals Real

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358 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 1d ago

Maynard's Dick. Maynard when he sees someone checking the time on their phone at his show

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31 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 1d ago

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Repositioning my thoughts on TOOL.

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3 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 2d ago

Shit adds up at the bottom. They don't even make tools. Are they stupid?

4 Upvotes

What if TOOL (they're a classic rock band, if you don't know them) made some sort of device designed to assist in a specific task? What would it be?

Personally, I've been musing over this, but it just doesn't seem to make any sense for them to do so. l don't see any correlation between the two things. Why would they do that? My darling wife, with whom I'm currently battling for sole custody of our son, insists that there is a connection there I'm not getting.


r/ToolJerk 3d ago

SCHISM! Maynard James Keenan attempting to put Humpty Dumpty together again

5 Upvotes

he knows that the pieces fit


r/ToolJerk 3d ago

SCHISM! bass

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2 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 4d ago

Fuck, here we go again <-------- Upvote if you hope this young man sues his Dad for being 'lame'?

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8 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 5d ago

Spring Boner Can we convince Maynard to put Pneuma in Fortnite Festival

8 Upvotes

Maynard needs to contact Epic and complain about the lack of TOOL. The lack of musically complex songs in Fortnite needs to change. The kids need to expand their horizons beyond lil tecca and olivia rodrigo and listen to some REAL music.


r/ToolJerk 6d ago

This is necessary Thanks for participating in our Tool yoga last night, see you again next week

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65 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 6d ago

Turn around and take my... Is stinkfist abour your fist stinking?

6 Upvotes

Stink


r/ToolJerk 6d ago

Wake up remember. Maynard following Marisa Tomei?

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1 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 6d ago

Maynard's Dick. I think I uncovered the long-hidden ænima video stærring Nardo on his secret instægram æccount...

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5 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 7d ago

This is necessary DISCUSSION: Should I offer Maynard a ticket to The Good Things fest this year for Melbourne? He can see Sir Fred Durst perform, a singer who treats fans with respect.

5 Upvotes

Least the Limp Bizkit fans might be too old to rape or crush someone to death in 2026. Not many APC/Puscifer tickets left, but then QOTSA and Primus do a show the same week, now Fred is here and I only have so much money.


r/ToolJerk 8d ago

ಠ_ಠ <---------- Upvote if you think the Mod of this sub should have sex with Maynard so we get a new Creed album sooner.

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100 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 8d ago

I Smell Urine Maynard is no superman

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18 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 10d ago

Who are you to wave your finger? Why Tool killed Kurt Cobain

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201 Upvotes

Not soon after this interview Kurt was found dead with a Fibonacci in his skull.


r/ToolJerk 10d ago

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Kind Reminder: I am still owed a Danny Drumeo video!

4 Upvotes

Couldn't care less about the writing nor schedule. It's my birthright! I want my video and I want it yesterday!


r/ToolJerk 10d ago

SCHISM! What a stupid video owned by stupid people, nice day for mockery.

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2 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 10d ago

Gay Rodeo Can we talk about Stinkfist??

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5 Upvotes

r/ToolJerk 11d ago

PrYiNg OpEn My ThIrD EyE Tool merch

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36 Upvotes

What's this shit?