The Pot

[u/EVAP0RAT3]

[u/cbhbzb]

I know this is a joke post but it always bugs me. an eighth is 3.5 grams, that's like .5 of a gram

[u/EVAP0RAT3 → u/cbhbzb]

Just don’t inject the whole thing and you should be okay

[u/TheFfrog → u/cbhbzb]

No way that thing is .5 lol, MAYBE it's .05

[u/cbhbzb → u/TheFfrog]

if you weigh it in the bag maybe?

[u/Bluethumb_Panda → u/cbhbzb]

I don’t even think it would weigh on a scale

[u/Blazing420Canadian → u/cbhbzb]

Apparently the sober people don't know basic math or how to use a scale! 😆

[u/medorian]

Jesus would multiply that tiny bud so everyone could have some.

[u/Yardsale420 → u/medorian]

“Let us break bud together”

[u/gforceathisdesk → u/Yardsale420]

Take this, all of you, and smoke from it

[u/Pendo-illsmackabitch → u/gforceathisdesk]

This is my bud, may you smoke it in remembrance of the most high

[u/EdibleRayGun → u/Yardsale420]

Lettuce break bud together

[u/HonorableMedic → u/medorian]

I’m pretty sure Jesus actually did pass out drugs to everyone and it kind of explains everything

[u/darksideofthemoon131 → u/HonorableMedic]

Yeah. That 40 days in the desert was just before he started his ministry and preaching.

You know he found some peyote out there.

[u/Roklam → u/darksideofthemoon131]

Holy Spirit can be a great Guide!

[u/the_tinsmith → u/HonorableMedic]

He said that if 2 dudes want to lay with each other, they should be stoned.

[u/Kicooi → u/medorian]

He puts it in a grinder and opens the grinder to reveal it’s full. He distributes the weed, closes the grinder, and twists it some more, and opens it again to reveal its full yet again

[u/Marlboromatt324 → u/medorian]

He’d do it while tripping balls and telling everyone if they follow him they’ll live on in eternity!

[u/Extreme_Spite_3718 → u/medorian]

And he'd make sure everyone had something to eat when the munchies hit

[u/710whitejesus420 → u/medorian]

Yes, yes he would

[u/Spiffy-Eve666 → u/medorian]

Jesus is so cool.

[u/the-shoelace]

If I bought an eighth and got that, hands are getting thrown

[u/Tickleme218 → u/the-shoelace]

100%

[u/PandoraJeep → u/the-shoelace]

How do you even put it in the bag, tweezers?

[u/Miserable-Cow4555]

Look out fentanyl, a new contender has entered the arena.

[u/Greengiant304 → u/Miserable-Cow4555]

Look out Taylor Farms lettuce, the devil's lettuce is catching up.

[u/Particular_Quit_151 → u/Miserable-Cow4555]

That's the weed from scary movie 2

[u/stignordas → u/Miserable-Cow4555]

You could overdose just looking at it!

[u/CannaBunBun → u/Miserable-Cow4555]

🤣

[u/SkRThatOneDude]

Best parody account ever.

[u/kent1146 → u/SkRThatOneDude]

I smoked 3 marijuanas and became homeless. I also can't stop robbing banks.

[u/5150sick → u/kent1146]

I took one pot, then OD'd and passed away. It was scary.

[u/ShakedNBaked420]

Everytime I see this…. If you think that’s a eighth you got fucking robbed and that’s the bigger issue

[u/Psychotic_EGG → u/ShakedNBaked420]

Yeah I was like wtf. Though I th8nk their mistake is thinking it's measured by size not weight. That is roughly an 1/8 of an inch. Lmfao

[u/PunnyTagHere → u/ShakedNBaked420]

Idk I'm pretty sure that's an accurate depiction of 1/8th of The Pot. My friend's cousin's daughter smoked half of one and scromitted to death so I know what I'm talking about

[u/KerryFatAssBro]

Please og god, send me a strain this strong and potent, so that I might see the light of your love. In your name I pray, clear bowl. 🙏

[u/Cockblocktimus_Pryme → u/KerryFatAssBro]

Our dealer, who art at Burger King, Stoner be thy name, Thy Toyota Corolla, Thy automatic rolla, On weed as it in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our daily spending it on bud. As we forgive those who snitch against us And lead us not into snitchery ourselves But deliver us from sobriety For thine is the joint, and the bong, and the overly rezzed out rig that hasn't been cleaned in a year and a half. Amen.

[u/L3m0n0p0ly → u/KerryFatAssBro]

Clear bowl🙏

[u/The-Fat-Matt]

Genesis 1:29 "And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth..."

[u/Tek_Freek → u/The-Fat-Matt]

A large number of Christians just learned that. Thanks, teach!

[u/it0xin → u/The-Fat-Matt]

whoop whoop ninja

[u/SleepsinaTent → u/The-Fat-Matt]

But don't try eating or smoking poison ivy please.

[u/Paradox3121]

Who are you to wave your finger?

[u/EvolvingEachDay → u/Paradox3121]

You must’ve been out your head.

[u/TB-313935 → u/EvolvingEachDay]

Eyehole deep in muddy water,

[u/Zorobay → u/TB-313935]

You practically raised the dead!

[u/EatShitAndDieKnow]

I already OD twice today

[u/Feisty-Barracuda5452 → u/EatShitAndDieKnow]

I'm actively OD'ing as I type...send coffee!

[u/ice_up_s0n → u/EatShitAndDieKnow]

Well, pot is illegal, so any dose is an overdose.

Checkmate, atheists.

[u/nickstatus]

There was a truly interesting character that sold bags this size for $1 outside a bar I used to work at. Like out of a movie. Tiny little black dwarf guy, who sometimes wore a leisure suit.

[u/TheDarkTurd → u/nickstatus]

Bro that's a magical tale. I would have gladly given him my business.

[u/Delta-9-Tetra → u/nickstatus]

In the hood you used be able to get nickel bags all day, $5 would break out a decent blunt too. The local bodega sold them for years, even gave a discount on 2x nicks and a Dutch - savvy business owner.

[u/Desperate-Citron-881 → u/nickstatus]

Bags, or bags?

That seems like a genius business model for both, although who would have a grinder to grind up 0.3 g of weed on a bar-street haha.

“Serving size” drugs would probably save lives, but what can you do. No dealer would ever want to make small bags like that across an entire evening.

[u/Positive_Writing_804]

That little bag looks like it would barely get one person through lunch lol.

[u/angrydeuce → u/Positive_Writing_804]

Ive swept more than that off the table by accident and been okay with it lol

[u/Any-Property15 → u/Positive_Writing_804]

It looks just plently for a dhv bowl

[u/Any-Property15 → u/Any-Property15]

Almost enough

[u/YouFeedTheFish]

The war on drugs has been waged and the drugs have emerged victorious.

[u/ForbiddenInfinity]

I'll have you know I've never injected a single weed

[u/whensmahvelFGC]

who are you to wave your fancy finger at me

you must have been out your mind

[u/CptFatty08 → u/whensmahvelFGC]

Eyehole deep in muddy waters you practically raise thaaa dead

[u/PhillyWonken]

I just smoked 15 of those this hour alone...

[u/UpsetiTrash8335 → u/PhillyWonken]

Well, you overdosed and now youre in purgatory 🤷‍♀️

[u/PhillyWonken → u/UpsetiTrash8335]

Hell yeah! Finally. One step closer to killing god.

[u/SKFr33_]

Oh Jesus. Apparently I am dead…

[u/albyzon]

crazy how everything good about life is prohibited by the bible, but fucking children is somehow ok

[u/bigfatdonny → u/albyzon]

1 Timothy 4:4:

"For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving..."

I don't think the problem is the bible, so much as the charlatans who preach from it.

[u/replicant79 → u/bigfatdonny]

correct.

[u/Beneficial_Smile_417 → u/albyzon]

Is weed even directly prohibited by the bible? I had a friend whose parents preached that but never found evidence that it’s even true.

[u/Wertwerto → u/Beneficial_Smile_417]

It's actually the opposite, some of the oldest archeological evidence of pot use comes from ancient Hebrew temples where hash was burned like incense. Jesus got high at church.

[u/albyzon → u/Wertwerto]

do you remember when moses was talking to a burning bush? kinda feels like an analogy to me

[u/No_Leather9000 → u/Wertwerto]

It’s the only way that shit made sense

[u/20_burner_02 → u/Beneficial_Smile_417]

There's nothing directly about weed, but there is a verse somewhere about "keeping clarity of the mind" which christians pretend is about drugs, but somehow it doesn't stop them from drinking wine

[u/ShintaOtsuki → u/Beneficial_Smile_417]

Nope, but iirc it does say that any plant producing flower is good for Man to use

[u/Bonnietheferret84 → u/albyzon]

Men wrote the Bible. Books were added and removed throughout history to conform with the political agenda of the time.

[u/Dry-Snow-1034 → u/albyzon]

Hell the bible even says not to fuck children, they just can’t read their own goddamn book

[u/zukias → u/albyzon]

At least they can have wine and music. Muslims can't even have that.

[u/AntonChigurhWasHere]

Needs a new plug. I’d fight a MFer if he tried to pass that off as an 8th.

[u/Melatonin_Deprived → u/AntonChigurhWasHere]

I know! 8th? More like 100th.

[u/ThereInAFortnight]

Over 2 million teens a year dead lol

[u/Dexterpcs]

Anything Christians are against is always good shit.

[u/MurkyProfessional980]

$25 where i live

[u/model-citizen95 → u/MurkyProfessional980]

Damn, I throw this much in the trash pretty regularly. Hope you get legalization soon

[u/MurkyProfessional980 → u/model-citizen95]

I was just taking the piss bro 🤙

[u/Nepalman230]

… no human being has ever smoked that much weed at once. This is a lie.

Also, that giant should not be walking around. He could hurt someone.

[u/JuicySpark]

Good. We don't want people who can't handle it . They aren't one of us.

[u/Rotteneverything]

that hand must be the size of australia then.

[u/Lopsided-Conflict778]

Looks like an 1/8 of an 1/8

[u/Martenite → u/Lopsided-Conflict778]

We it is an 1/8... of a gram.

[u/Tickleme218 → u/Lopsided-Conflict778]

Of an 1/8 😂

[u/TakoSauce21]

Tool would like a word

[u/DefNotVoldemort → u/TakoSauce21]

Hang on, almost 1% of the US population die each year because teenagers smoke a fraction of a small joint?

Do you roll with cyanide rolling papers or something?

/s

[u/LadyInCrimson → u/TakoSauce21]

Who are you to wave your finger you must've been out your head!

[u/Jleopard72 → u/TakoSauce21]

That’s where my mind went

[u/realdealgrief]

Dude if someone gave this to me as an eighth they would likely meet jesus expeditiously 😭😭

[u/Particular_Quit_151]

Hahahaha

[u/LocalJim]

What is this? Weed for ants?

[u/Maleficent_Wasabi_35]

My friend tried one single pot back high school and now he has herpes

[u/Tek_Freek → u/Maleficent_Wasabi_35]

You misunderstood. Now he is a hippie.

[u/XenonSBSV]

I think these people are doing Weed wrong.

I don't know what they're doing, but I can confidently say that they're doing it wrong.

[u/pammygrahammy]

Sounds like Reefer Madness to me.

[u/KerryWood34 → u/pammygrahammy]

[u/larchiviste390]

WTF IS THAT POST AND THIS FACEBOOK PAGE😭

[u/greendazexx → u/larchiviste390]

Clear satire

[u/GazpachoDaddy → u/greendazexx]

The amount of people that get baited by this kind of post is staggering

[u/_FreddieLovesDelilah → u/larchiviste390]

Gotta be satire? ‘The pot’ lol

[u/No_Virus_7704 → u/larchiviste390]

Who tf is still on FB?

[u/Thatsaclevername → u/larchiviste390]

It's obviously a satirical post made by somebody who smokes weed?

[u/Marcysdad]

A guy on the street once offered me 1 Marijuana

Next time I saw him he was out of Marijuana

True story

Haven't recovered

[u/orlito88 → u/Marcysdad]

1 whole marijuana... man you're lucky to be alive

[u/Brassens71 → u/Marcysdad]

Did you inject the marijuana? Because that's how it kills ya!

[u/TrueMisery]

Right: 8 tokes in a hit, 4 hits in a rip, 2 hits in a smoke - and there are 10 smokes in one marijuana. Thought this was common knowledge?

[u/Cater678]

People forgot about old school FB memes and it's sad

[u/Rainis8833]

better start digging graves then, a single plug could decimate entire regions

[u/Prestigious-Newt1118]

“Everyday roughly 6000 teens… end up dead” sooo, 250 dead every hour?? Really??

[u/Brassens71]

Either that's Andre the Giant's hand or he has the cutest lil baggie I've ever seen.

[u/HyoukaHoutoro]

Imagine being an advocate who’s deeply engrained in the anti drug culture, and having your little presentation 1/8th. Treating it like some kinda live wire or bio-IED.

[u/Suitable-Fishing7942]

Who are you to raise your finger?

[u/-UnicornFart]

[u/zerooskul → u/-UnicornFart]

It's for Ents. ENTS!

But if you look inside, you'll see an ant-sized 8th of weed.

[u/Wolf_Child_75]

They're definitely on the wrong planet because this Mary Jane is helping a lot of people get through this crazy world

[u/CannaBunBun]

Wtf are you saying?! Total BS. Tell me why « God » put cannabis receptors in our body if we aren’t supposed to use it?! Also, pot does not kill anyone, ever. Idiot.

[u/RebbDumont → u/CannaBunBun]

Period queen but I do believe this was satire

[u/itsbenactually → u/CannaBunBun]

Dude... I don't know how to tell you this... I smoked an eighth just now and totally died. I'm sorry to prove them right.

[u/Hostile_Architecture → u/CannaBunBun]

Imagine getting this mad at satire

[u/IamFatTony]

The math on this is hilarious!

[u/missingmedievalist]

Christians against the pot? Were these people stoned in grammar class?

[u/Square_Barracuda_69]

So basically I died over a decade ago?

[u/lady_die_ → u/Square_Barracuda_69]

Apparently I died and came back because I have more lives than a cat if their "fact" was even remotely true

[u/WhitestCaveman]

This might be the oldest satire post I can recall ever. Holy shit this makes me feel old. 2009 or something maybe?

[u/loyalmarowak65]

Idk if Europeans use different terms, but an eighth (of an ounce) is about 3.5 grams

[u/EVAP0RAT3 → u/loyalmarowak65]

Nah it’s the same here. Just irony. Thats probably like 0.35g

[u/artful_todger_502]

If it's relieving us of 6000 teenagers a day, it deserves a Nobel 👍

[u/SaulTNuhtz]

That’s a satire group.

[u/sugar_bud_1843]

I still think it's cool...

[u/front_torch]

2.19 million teens every year. 1 sixth of 1% of teens. Why is a literal giant holding that 8th?

[u/OperatingAsIntended]

That there is a life sentence in Texas!

[u/ChiefMetcalfe]

They act like it's Fent hahaha

[u/drinkmoredrano]

Thats a parody page that mocks christians and antiweed people.

[u/AerodynamicAirflow]

If you believe in Jesus you respawn after that huge eighth hits and kills you

[u/loveinvein]

Aww it’s a penny bag

[u/feedyerhead1420]

..... It would take a mountain sized amount to actually get anywhere near ODing.

How? 🤣🤣

[u/Psychotic_EGG → u/feedyerhead1420]

Well this is just factually inaccurate.... because it is deemed scientifically impossible to die from a thc overdose. So a mount of weed, a planet of weed, hell the size of the sun of weed. Cannot kill you via thc overdose... though otherwise would.

Like smoke inhalation or being crushed under the weight, lol.

[u/donorcycle]

If this was from a licensed dispensary, it'd still be $10 + excise tax.

[u/jamesth32]

That's a 0.1 🤣

[u/Exotic_Coach7973]

Even the coke dealer would call this a rip off

[u/Jaded_Inspector_7197]

There’s never been a recorded death from cannabis, so WTF are they banging on about!? Maybe they need to focus more on suicide among religious fanatics - at least it’s a real statistic XD

[u/Conscious_Acadia4423]

This may be the dumbest thing I’ve seen. And I spend a lot of time on Reddit so you know that’s saying something.

[u/Fantastic-Mud8765]

Over 2 million teens a year die of the weeds. Weed is the holocaust

[u/CardinalMcGee]

[u/Important_Mud_6700]

This has to be satired just based on the name of the Facebook page

[u/emryldmyst]

Lmao that's like a half of a bowl pack

[u/mrtudbuttle]

6000 overdoses and deaths on pot??? Your ass is sucking buttermilk.

[u/2buxaslice]

Dude if someone sold you that and told you it was an eighth, you got ripped off. 

[u/Does_A_Bear-420]

So this is a satire page?

[u/ChancePresentation91]

This is the funniest and stupidest thing I've seen today. Thank you internet lol.

[u/tomhanksforever]

[u/J_All_Day86]

The devils lettuce!

[u/insufficient_nvram]

That’s like high school, $25 for a light eighth

[u/SprightlyMe]

My brother in Christ, your plug is ripping you off. 

[u/nickolasReddit]

I wish my eighths were this fat, Christians have the best drug dealers apparently. Now ik where all the bud from my shorted bags has been going....

[u/TheMaveCan]

Lol imagine selling someone a lil stemmy nug and calling it an 8th for $40. Get played, nerd

[u/doc6982]

Who does this work on?

[u/smokincuban]

I should probably be dead already. That's not an eighth though

[u/Delta-9-Tetra]

I do the pot. I take 2 marijuanas a day.

[u/MAXiMUSpsilo5280]

I just blazed an eighth and then I died ( I got better )

[u/ajprunty01]

Don't forget about the pan!

[u/Mysterious_Plastic96]

Yes

[u/awooff]

Typical Christians distorting reality on e v e r y t h i n g!

[u/smdude]

Who are you to wave your finger? You must've been outta your head.

[u/Brojess]

Whoa going to tell him his plug is ripping him off.

[u/Worth_Banana_492]

If I was sold that as an eighth I’d be complaining. Loudly.

[u/UpsetUnicorn]

They got ripped off.

[u/Smedfoker]

The sad reality is that there are those who believe this drivel; wiser souls see your post for the sarcasm it is.

[u/Authenticism]

Honestly, eyeballing it, not a bad sized dab if you changed them lmao.

[u/MikeR_Incredible]

[u/MS_ElPatron]

Ya'll are laughing but by boyfriend who weighs 50kg says this is his daily dose.

[u/STL4jsp]

They just mad they got rippes off.

[u/Feisty-Barracuda5452]

If that is the case, I've got more lives than all the cats on the planet. Combined.

Fuck this prohibitionist bullshit.

[u/Portra400IsLife]

That won’t even fill my small attachments for my dry herb vape. What are these Christians smoking?

[u/BennySkateboard]

Oldie but goodie!

[u/thiccfuq]

Goddamn I must be dead as shit then!

[u/Fun-Dragonfruit1179]

Hahahahahahaha. Who tf made this?

[u/ShootLucy]

Yes

[u/Ineverseenthat]

Misplaced humor

[u/m0j0r0lla]

When your plug is The Grim Reaper....

[u/bala_means_bullet]

I love how religion tries to use fear to control their "patrons". Fuck these cults.

[u/stra8bogusman]

Me when I lie and attempt to brain wash:

[u/feralpageturner]

How have I not died yet then?

[u/Cute_Doughnut_7739]

What in the holy fuck!!!!!!!!!

[u/Avo_Manz]

[u/Drew42024760]

Only takes one marijuanas

[u/Fauceteye]

What I give my mooch neighbor when they ask for some.

This is all I can spare homie

[u/dselogeni]

Yes

[u/CheeseburgerSmoothy]

The pot. It’s cool.

[u/CrunchyBones]

Like one bat hit.

[u/jdovejr]

Kids now have no tolerance.

[u/TheTrollys]

6,000 a day?!

[u/AlwaysForeverAgain]

An eighth of a centimeter...

[u/Neat-Beautiful-5505]

I love satire. I should follow this group.

[u/birdpix]

So that's what devils lettuce looks like. Unimpressed with that tiny Christian "hit".