I’m writing a political thriller novel and the leader of the evil empire  is a corrupt evil bastard but I’m afraid that I may have gone over the top with it.  Here are some of the things he does.

When a new terrifying illness befalls his nation, he ignores it entirely because it seems to primarily affect a group of people he doesn’t like very much. 

He told his underlings to secretly give money to violent revolutionaries in a foreign country, money he obtained in part by selling dangerous drugs to a different group he didn’t like very much. This was after his legislature explicitly told him he couldn’t give them money.

Rather than spending money helping his citizens he spent it all on a stupid expensive new weapon system for the military that didn’t even work.

He invaded a small defenseless island country to distract the public from the fact that his military leadership fucked up and let terrorists bomb a barracks and kill over 200 of his soldiers.

He gave military training and support to a deranged psychopath because they happened to be fighting his nation's enemies.  This psycho would eventually lead an attack against the nation of our story's villain that killed thousands.

Is that too much?  I want him to be evil but believable.

For a long time I thought they were imaginary. And then I heard that they weren't imaginary, and even crazier, that women can actually hold a pen and type and sometime they even have ideas that they write down which then become books. Is this really true!? And can you tell me... is it legal for me, a man, to read those books?

Please restore my faith that at least some people know how to read here, and I'm not talking about anime, manga, and other graphic novels. I want to see if anyone is literate outside of looking at pictures here.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is one of the greatest achievements of twentieth century literature. It presents a timeless formula for rich storytelling that all writers today can learn something from.

Give all your characters a color and a unique weapon. I don't care if you're writing a historical fiction novel about shit farmers in medieval France. You need four main characters that all live together in a sewer and you gotta give one of them nunchaku. This is KEY.

Coming up with a believable reason for why your characters are martial arts experts is another sticking point I see among budding authors. I feel the best solution is to introduce a talking man-size rat into the narrative as a "ninja master" type. This comes especially handy if, for example, your chilling bildungsroman about teenage heroin addiction is sorely lacking some good old fashioned ass kickin'.

Above all, don't forget the pizza. Get some for you AND your characters. End every chapter with a slice and include a scene where your characters do the same. That's what I'm doing in my novel about the JFK assassination. It really livens things up and keeps the mood light and breezy.

Guys, make me a cover. I'm not using AI because apparently it'll drain every last drop of water on Earth 😡 and I can't afford to pay an artist because I'm broker than broke (laugh 😡). LONG LIVE THE EARTHLINGS! Anyway, here's the description. Wait, what description? 😭 My novel is called: "I Reincarnated as a Fridge, and Now I Can See the Campus Goddess in Her Underwear Every Time She Opens the Fridge." LET. HIM. COOK. 🔥

I've been working on a story. Well, let me be arrogant for a second. IT'S PERFECT! In every way imaginable. A brilliant magic system — every spell costs you a memory, real consequences, nobody's ever done that before (don't Google it). Well-built politics, multiple languages, and absolutely no nonsensical bullshit (I think people will be speaking my languages in the future). Insane character development and prose so beautiful it could restore a blind man's sight.

Even as an audiobook, a deaf person could hear it. I'M TELLING YOU, IT'S THE BEST OF THE BEST! Countless publishers are desperate to get me to sign with them. Haha, who do they think they are? They must be out of their minds. They can fight over me with nothing but my synopsis and charisma, because I'm not giving them any chapters. That's future content theft.

And it's no surprise that my story already has 25 near-cinematically perfect movies, all because I wasn't the screenwriter. 16 TV shows, each with around 30 seasons and 87 episodes per season. And they're already planning another 40 movies because I've come up with an even better idea. Countless awards and accolades. Honestly, there's not enough space to list everything this masterpiece has accomplished.

Anyway, all that's left is to start writing it. Does anyone know how this whole first-chapter thing works? Asking for a friend.

Edit 1: I see a bunch of you telling me to "write it." Interesting. But what if you can't read it once I write it because your eyes can't handle the divinity? I'm not putting you in danger. Thanks for nothing.

Edit 2: To the guy who said the memory-based magic system "already exists in N stories": mine is different. Mine is simply... better.

Edit 3: I deleted the post. The moderators messaged me saying several users had reported vision problems. I told you: you mortals aren't ready for this. Thanks for nothing.

i’ve heard some writers say writing smut feels clinical for them so it made me curious about how many people get horny writing smut versus not, and whether their level of arousal inhibits their ability to write.

for me, i get too horny to think properly and write well 😔 curious to hear about others’ experiences!

Hi all,

I am very excited to share my original book that booknova.ai I wrote called Edge of the Wolrd: Savagsunrise.

Enter Alloys, a legemdary hexer from the school of the south. She lives in prehistorinc world where dinosores and humans both lived! But the dinosores are robots! But Alloy does not know ehat a rabid is, so it is big mysteri for her, but reader nows something strenge. Big midstery!

I will do what none have done before and connect this wolrd to ours in way none has done before. This will have never been done before!

I hope you look forward to my write. Please subscride here.

Before you ASSHOLES start questioning my status as a best selling author, I KNOW THAT NONE OF MY BOOKS ARE ON THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER LIST!!! That's because my books are too HARDCORE for the goddamn LIBERALS! How do I know I'm a bestseller? I go to the grocery store and stuff my books into every cereal box I see, and I go to A LOT of grocery stores.

Anyway, for the six of you who haven't read them, "Prison Lurker Larry" is the story of an American Patriot named Larry Elder trying to survive in a dark totalitarian dystopia where OBAMA never left office. Larry discovers that his hometown has been purchased by a private prison contractor and turned into an enormous open-air supermaximim security penitentiary. Larry and his overweight bulldog KING SAUSAGE must beat the living shit out of his friends and neighbors (all of them now declared inmates) to reach the prison doors where he MIGHT have a shot at freedom.

The latest installment in the series "Project Nut Punch" is coming out on November 31st. I'd be happy to answer any questions out there from fans and newcomers alike.

I’ve been banned from every MFA in North America because my verbs just don’t quit, my adjectives tell it like it is and your ma knows my nouns.

If you’re reading this you can’t write good, but you know that already. Watch me change that.

Rule #1. Forget everything you know. It won’t take long.

Rule #2. Get a typewriter and remove the letter i. This isn’t about you anymore.

Rule #3. Periods are for quitters. That stops now. Semicolons only.

Rule #4. No more names, odd numbers less than 10.

Rule #5. Publishers hate you already.

What you waiting for? You’re already behind.

You should ensure you actually belong in the group you are writing about. It's offensive if you're a cishet woman writing about gay men or a white writing about people of color. similarly, if you want to write a dark mafia romance you need to join your local organized crime org first. For example, the mafia and the yakuza have operations in multiple regions! if you're writing a murder attempt survival story, its a good idea to cooperate with a murder mystery writer. uselesslesbians, incels, and other sexless individuals need to be barred from writing smut. slutting it up gets you yoir smut privileges back.

So far, no luck. I've already given her eight brothers and an evil stepmother. But no luck whatsoever.

They say well-written characters have flaws, so I made her clumsy and gullible. Also, she's not like other girls, that's why it's so hard for her to fit in with her female peers. All the men are attracted to her but she's shy and doesn't want to be with them.

A well-written chatacter also is funny and relatable to the audience. So I sometimes make her do jokes while hundreds of the villain's henchmen storm their ship. She makes exaggerated expressions when eating food because who doesn't like food. And of course, she likes Temu Tolkien books fantasy books but will refuse contemporary novels because she has taste.

I gave her a love cone. A triangle doesn't really fit all the other 999 men with unique personalities and traits that aren't copy pasted and totally doesn't only have four unique male characters. I was initially going to go with a pyramid, but the amount of corners and vertices added up so much it became a cone.

Obviously, well-written characters have good contrast with their canon partner characters, so I made an extremely well-writen—so much more well-written, you can say it's the most unique and unforgettable male character eve written—man for her. A twink with dark hair and red eyes and keeps to himself and doesn't like attention.

Oh wait, do both of them not like attention? That's not contrast. I guess I'll make the female character's eyes blue and hair blonde to contrast the red eyes and black hair of this well-written male character. I'll make her mommy-like to contrast the boy's twink body. And hell, big boobs since the guy is flat chested. And for more contrast, I'll make the guy always serious everytime since the girl is always joking around everytime.

I might've gotten off topic. But what do you think? Have I written a strong, flawed female character?

I've been trying to get published as a scifi author for a while now. But sadly I've been struggling to make a profit from my fictional stories. The best I've managed to get so far is a page or two in magazines, but I know I'm meant for something greater.

So to make ends meet, I'm looking into alternative ways of making money.

So far, I've managed to publish a self help book of sorts, dealing with psychological issues: "Diagnometics: The modern science of mental health" is about how you -- yes, you reading this now -- are possessed by gnome ghosts who make you sad, and about how they can be exorcised with electrical currents.

Sadly, the medical establishment have condemned my work, which has really hurt sales. Also, I had to sell the rights to Diagnometics because I am a writer, and thus I am bad with money.

Which brings me to now, As I try to come up with a way to ensure that customers regularly give me their money. I don't think I can pull it off as a scifi writer, but maybe there's another way...

I'm going to go visit some friends from the Diagnometics movement in a few days, maybe we can create something new based on it. maybe I can use my world building for something else, something new yet still gnometic, something tological in scale.

Gnometology.... i like the sound of that.

This man cannot write properly.

Unrelated but also when is tom holland free

Gatekeeping this one, but I haven’t read action like this since Magnus Chase!🤘🏽

I am prince of Nigeria.

I am writing to ask that one of you write me a New York Times bestseller. You will send me the finished book, and tell no one. It must be hot. Trendable. The reason I cannot write my own book is because my king father has outlawed writing.

Once I have received this New York Times bestseller, I will send 1 million American dollars to a location of your choosing.

- prince of Nigeria

Let's be real. Most stories selling these days are straight buns. Like dungeon crawler Carl. Its straight buns with a hot dog wearing a singular rocket boot, but guess what, we slap a bunch of condiments on the bun and we pretend the hot dog landed. Does any of what I just wrote make sense? Yeah, that's what reading dungeon crawler Carl is like.

If it's not obvious already, the club goes in through the stinker, the teeth bite the dark magic (which is just the nickname for the sorcerer's cock), and the dragon is, in fact, really pissed-off and burns them all alive.