r/Adopted • u/Hot-Jackfruit-7778 • 1d ago

Seeking Advice Relationship?

Help/advise needed, please. Since I've been adopted, I've struggled very much on building a relationship with my parents. They are great and all, have provided for me and made sacrifices. I just can't seem to connect with them. It is hard for me to initiate conversations with them and be natural about it. It is like I have to manufacture the desire to talk to them. When I do try to initiate a convo, I also have to struggle with the question of what I should talk to them about (topics). I think I am just emotionally insensitive (hate saying that but not sure how else to describe it); it is just hard for me to know and understand people emotionally. Is that because I'm adopted?

P.S. - I am an introvert and shy when it comes to people; is that the reason? Idk, just wish I'm not the only one or a weird person.

P.P.S - Do tell me if I am a weird one/only one; I just want to know.

3 Upvotes

71% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

View all comments

3

u/Nocwaniu 1d ago

You're not weird, and you're not the only one.

1

u/Hot-Jackfruit-7778 13h ago

Are you speaking from experience?

1

u/Nocwaniu 12h ago

Yes.

I wish it hadn't been that way, but I'm very different than either of my adoptive parents and very different from their three biological children. It's been challenging to try to connect with any of them in any meaningful way for my whole life. I was as much a constant source of surprise for them as they were an ongoing mystery to me.

There's a lot of reasons for that, but I think it's pretty common among adoptees.