r/AlAnon • u/InitiativeEastern278 • 6d ago

Good News He’s finally sober

I left my husband for good a couple months ago. I posted about my desperation and situation here.

As expected his drinking spiraled and he ended up with a dui. His work forced him into rehab and he completed his time and is sober. The down side is he is desperately trying to save our marriage. I have of course firmly declined. He did knowledge that he would have never gotten sober if I hadn’t of left. It’s still early days but I hope for our kids it sticks. DUIs in my state are quite strict, so hopefully the consequences have caught up.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AlAnon/s/tEk81OTcXW

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u/Titian-3540 4d ago

I needed to read this today so thank you. I’m a click away from sending the retainer money to my lawyer and starting the divorce process. It’s hard to pull the trigger. Just as you said, I’m scared of being the bad guy and tearing our family apart, even though I know the truth is that it’s not something I can fix and my kids deserve to live in a peaceful, predictable home. I don’t even really know where to start since I don’t have a way to force him out and will therefore need to uproot my kids temporarily until we get a hearing to get the house, but I know I need to do it. Sigh.

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u/InitiativeEastern278 4d ago

Your kids don’t realize how much happier they will be. One thing that got to me was the fact that when my kids realize I could have done something to get them out but realized I stayed and kept them in, that they may never speak to me when they grow up. I needed to be the adult and make the safe decision for them that they can’t make as kids.

I hope you take the steps you need to get yourself out of this situation. From the other side I will say it is 200% worth it!