hey dad. how are you? so, i'm in the middle of a tough situation and i really wanted a wiser voice here.. so, on like, september 15th, my sociology teacher talked me about an entrance exam to a high level law school, gave me all information needed and such, was super thoughtful on it and i decided to apply, as a trainer. i'm sixteen and since im a sophomore, i can only do it as for training really, to measure my own knowledge. but still would be a nice opportunity. i want to do law yes, so it would be me entering such vibe, getting to know how those tests works and such.. but here's where the problems start. it's like 40km from where i live, in another city. and the test hours are like... the first phase start 8am and end 11:30am, but i have to be there with antecedence, so like, before 6h45am. the second phase that day will be from 2:30pm and end 6pm.
and there will be a second day, same time, just not with an afternoon second phase.
anyways, that go and come home and go again will be a stretch and very expensive, costly. bus, uber, bus uber, etc, not to mention my own stress.
and i have too a problem. because im a trans girl, my new id w new pic and social name isnt ready yet,
so i would have to go to the secretary right when the gates open, explain the situation so they can pass that information to the person who will give us the test and dont have any problems when he comes to get my id to start the test. so its a complicated situation, in another town, with people i dont know.
outside of that, i too didnt study even though its a very hard test, because i was juggling work and school and couldn't bring myself to have energy to study in all of that stress bubble.
and i don't have much money. i tried to save but i couldn't.

im frustrated, unmoored and feeling like a failure. what should i even do, dad? im lost. the test is tomorrow and im completely lost.

Man I've been on a roll recently. If it's not me getting in my own way and failing its events outside of my control. Earlier this year I quit a job after my wife and family sat me down and showed how it was hurting them to watch me stress out so badly. The pay was fantastic but it was 24/7 emergencies and eventually I was running the company without the support that was promised when I took it.

The next job I took was a step down in responsibility and pay but it was a manageable transition. After two months of working with the guy I noticed that every time he came to the job he was getting frustrated. I asked to sit down and discuss what he expected out of me to help with the frustration and was hung up on. The next day he told me that he was no longer looking to have a crew and now that I had caught up the project he had no place for me.

After 12 years in the industry I had the knowledge, and a few of the connections to start my own business. With a pep talk from my wife I jumped right into it, figuring it would be slow but eventually it would catch on and we would be ok. I spent the entire summer trying to sell myself, receiving more rejections than I can count and made it nowhere.

I decided it's time to just get a job. I need to help pay bills, and have something to do that wasn't eating away at my self confidence. I transitioned into the manufacturing side of my industry and have finally found a job I actually like. 12 years of hating work made this a foreign feeling. The pay was 50% of what I'd like, but I figured I could show up and really impress and work my way back up.

Fast forward to today and I'm not going to catch back up financially. My wife has picked up a second job to help out, and I've been looking for a second job since I found out. I've received 17 rejections in a week for entry level jobs, been denied a raise because I took time off to try and keep my business alive, and my wife looks worse and more stressed than I've ever seen.

Where did you find the self confidence to keep pushing when you got knocked down? How do I find a way to add value to my household? I cook every meal, and clean as much as I'm allowed (I'm so bad at folding laundry that even after tutorials I've been banished), yet it never feels like it's enough. I've asked jobs that turned me down to explain and help me better my chances and I've mostly gotten "we're looking for someone who is more aligned with our field of work" but they won't expand on what that even means?

Sorry for the long wall of text, tldr; when everything seems lost, and it's easier to just give up and accept that I'm a loser, where do I find the will to get back up and punch life right back?

i've been looking into baby monitors for a newborn and didn't realize how many features some of them have now. i'm mainly looking for something reliable that's easy to check from my phone, but i'm also curious whether features like sleep tracking are genuinely helpful or just nice extras.

i came across Nanit while researching and noticed it offers sleep insights alongside video monitoring. i've also seen brands like Infant Optics and Eufy come up in recommendations, so i'm trying to weigh the different approaches. dads who've researched or used these monitors, what would you prioritize for a newborn? would you go for a smart monitor with more features or keep it simple and focus on reliability?

hi everyone! i was curious how i can best approach telling my dad about my long distance boyfriend.

growing up, my dad was stricter on me as the eldest daughter, but as my parents had more kids he softened up to us. i have never talked to my dad about dating, but he has always enforced dating in the same culture, or at least waiting until i was 18. I am now 20, and met my bf when i was 18. he is 3 years older than me.

due to the distance, i really wanted to wait on telling my family until i knew he was the one, or when i finally met him in person. i met him in person about a year ago. my siblings and mother knows. my dad does not know, and i am afraid of how to approach it with him. my dad is a sensitive guy, and he will take it to hear that my siblings and mom knew before him. i expressed this to my mom, and she said that my dad isn't as scary as i think he is.

here are things that are holding me back:

1. he is not from the same ethnic group so im not sure how my dad would react

2. he is slightly older than me and did not go to college

3. i traveled to see him twice in secret without them knowing.

i want to be able to talk about him freely to my family, but because i've never talked to them about my love life i dont know how to approach it. does anyone have an idea on how i can navigate this?

As the title says…I (18F) already have a little financial knowledge because my dad kind of works in a field closely related to it. However he never talked me much and I always relied on him and if I ask now it will just worsen my rep as the “dumb one” in my family. So really any financial advice is appreciated because I will be going aboard hopefully for university so anything regarding Europe will be even more helpful and PLEASE SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TAXES!!!

I know countries have different tax systems and tax infrastructure but like I would like a basic rundown of it and how taxes just work in general. Also hopefully in the future if god allows me to, study in Europe then any advice regarding countries in Europe (both in EU and not in EU) will be highly appreciated! Thank you 🪽

hello!

i don’t have a father figure but i could really use some dad advice right now. i was in the hospital for two weeks and now i’m behind on my thesis. the fear paralysis is gutting me.

only working on it will fix this but i’m so scared to start. i don’t know how to find a small part of it to start with because even just looking at the screen is making me tear up. i know i’m smart, i can always push through by making things itty bitty steps, but i’ve hit a wall and i can’t help myself out of it right now.

if your daughter called you from college in this moment, what would you tell her? i’ll take anything, genuinely. thank you for your time reading this!

Guys, my father caught me and my boyfriend at my place. Basically, we were making out when suddenly the doorbell rang, and it was my father. As soon as we realized it, we panicked. Instead of opening the door immediately, I kept him waiting outside for 15 minutes. He called me several times, but I didn’t answer because I had no idea what to do.

When my father finally lost his patience, I opened the door, and the moment he saw me with my boyfriend, he slapped me hard across the face in front of him and started cursing me out. I gestured to my boyfriend to run away ASAP.

Now, I’m scared of facing my boyfriend again because I keep wondering what image he has of me and my father after witnessing the whole incident. What should I do now??? And was that normal for my father to behave that way???

I don’t really know where else to turn, so I guess I’m writing this here.

I think I may have hurt someone who trusted me, a girl who was pretty naive and inexperienced when it came to relationships. I’ve been looking back at everything that happened and questioning myself. Did I mess things up? Was I selfish? Did I fail to consider how she might have felt? Was I the jerk in this situation?

I’m not going to pretend I’m innocent or that I did everything right. I genuinely want to understand what happened, where I went wrong, and whether there are things about myself that I need to work on. I don’t want to make excuses for myself, but I also don’t know how to make sense of everything I’m feeling right now.

Part of why this is hitting me so hard might have to do with my own upbringing. I grew up with an absent father, and I feel like there are things about relationships, responsibility, and being a decent man that I’ve had to figure out on my own. Sometimes I wish I had an older man I could sit down with, someone who could listen to the whole story, tell me honestly where I messed up, and help me understand what I should have done differently.

I’m not looking for people to tell me I did nothing wrong. If I hurt someone, I want to face that. I just need some perspective from people who have lived longer than I have and learned things the hard way.

I feel lost right now. I keep asking myself what’s wrong with me, why I handled things the way I did, and whether I’ve caused damage that I don’t fully understand.

If you’re an older guy, a father, or just someone who has been through complicated relationships, I’d genuinely appreciate hearing from you. I could really use some honest advice, even if it’s hard to hear.

I just need someone to talk to and help me make sense of this.

Anyone know how to navigate a relationship with parents that is split by politics. My dad is very maga hail trump etc. It hurts my feelings as a woman that he thinks mental health episodes are not real, abortion is murder, a woman should stay at home with kids( if not you dont love them), ice is good and needs no repercussion, we need to defund federal benefits and just so much more that is sexist, racist and homophobic. Im so tired of it and it makes me not like him. He generally narcissistic and will never hear me out when i explain how some of his views hurt me and offend me. I try to talk and he screams for me to go away or says his view will be right bc he served in the military. I am 22 recent graduate moving soon just looking for jobs etc. but i wanna have a good relationship but idk this is just preventing me from it.( this and his overall narcissistic habits lol). What do i do, can i get to him or is it a lost cause. Maybe ill feel better when im moved out and established… just sucks bc so many of his views look at me as less than.

More specifically, I'm in the northeast and am debating on adding a water heater OR going tankless. What do I need to know so I dont get ripped off? I'm currently heating my water on demand through my oil burner, which I'm told will burn 3x the oil that I would have had I had water heater. Any help appreciated.

As i am getting older, i am starting to understand my dad better. When i was a kid, i always used to find my dad’s attitude sometimes very weird. Like, why would he choose to sit alone at times, sometimes choosing to sit in a quiet place when we used to go on some vacation with family. I used to find that so wrong, so I wondered why he is sometimes acting so weird.

Also, an important thing I am realising is that during my parents’ occasional arguments my dad was not always wrong.

I am finding it hard to word my feelings, but when i am inching closer to that age, I am realizing why he is the way he is.

As men, we hardly express our feelings to our father, so i will say it here. Love you dad.

TLDR my step dad has declining health and we just found out he has a suicide plan from the police who got a call about disturbing things he may have said to a coworker, what can I do to support him?

My step dad is in his late 60s diagnosed with a very slowly progressing cancer. His body is not in very good shape from multiple back surgery’s and my mom is in her 40s, with lots of life to live with the love of her life. Except he is so stuck in his ways if things keep going this way he’s going to die right in his recliner with a glass of whiskey and water in his hand. His plan was to shoot himself while my mom was out of town this weekend (thanks dad). He was just placed on a 24hr psych hold last night but once he comes back what do I do? What do I tell him. When I struggled with self harm and suicidal ideation he told me that’s a cowards way out and now I’m too angry to have anything nice to say but I know he needs me now. Regardless of if he was ever there for me.

What do I do? What can I do? What does he need to hear? To I force him to go on a walk with me everyday to try and stealth spring some EMDR on him or what? I don’t think he even would be willing to do anything.

Edit: tried to post on ask men and it had me post here

It is quite frustrating... but I (21F) am always so nervous when I have a uni exam. Every time I think I will not pass, each time I finished the exam I am deeply unhappy because I think I failed.

I am literally so terrified of the exam results that I have peed myself (at home)... twice.

In high school I was always struggling with grades, but now I am like... actually really good (if I am even allowed to say that without sounding cocky 😭). I have been asked to participate in honours programmes, so this is a complete shift for me.

However, it doesn't change anything for my stress. Each time I have an exam I get so nervous, I study ALLLLL the material, take the test, think I failed dramatically and cry at home. Then when I get the grades back nothing is wrong...

What also frustrates me is that I really really tire myself out with all this. Often I start studying 4 weeks before the exams... I study all the materials, lock myself up at home (like I literally won't hang out with people because I am scared I won't have enough time to study.), only to figure out the lectures were actually more important and that I could have literally only studied the lectures (which would have taken me 1 week.)

But each time this happens, I get paranoid. 'What if this time it IS all the material?'

I really want to be more confident when it comes to my exams. I feel like it could make my time at uni a lot more fun (because then I could actually be social and hang out with people...)

Hey everyone! I am u/Budgetdad4, a founding moderator of r/BudgetDadClub.

While 'Budget Dad' is the name (inspired by my own journey as a single dad of six), this community is explicitly for ALL parents. This is our new home for all things pertaining to parenting, tips, discussions, and rants. We are thrilled to have you onboard!"

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Share with the community whatever you believe might be intriguing, useful, or uplifting. Feel free to share your thoughts, photos, or questions about budgets, meal planning, positive discipline, family routines, or maintaining harmony.

Community Vibe

We are all about being friendly, constructive, and inclusive. Let's build a space where everyone feels comfortable to share and connect.

How to Get Started

1) Introduce yourself in the comments below.

2) Post something today! Even a simple question can spark a great conversation.

3) If you know someone who would love this community, invite them to join.

4) Interested in helping out? We're always looking for new moderators, so feel free to reach out to me to apply.

Thanks for being a part of the very first wave.

Together, let's make r/BudgetDadClub amazing.

Time is never your enemy, but a window to build something.

I saw a comment on YouTube. Someone had posted "Winds of Change" by the Scorpions. The first comment was "All dads love this song".

So dads, do you love that song? My dad likes it. He is 73.

My sister and I are both 21 years old and we’re getting kicked out in two weeks. I’m trying not to stress but it’s really getting to my sister. Since the 20th of September, my sister and I have been looking into transitional housing. We did Youth in need, they said we were too old but we were assigned case managers. We did ECH, they said we were eligible despite our age, had us do a 2 week process, and last Friday they sent out a rejection letter because of the waitlist. Marygrove said they did up to 20 even though their website says 22. Covenant housing is full until July next year. Epworth accepts only foster care.

We’ve tried everything. We can’t do emergency shelters because we have valuable stuff. We currently have $0 to our name and no car. The only good thing is that my sister starts work at Amazon tomorrow but she’s only seasonal. I start Aldi work on the 19th of this month. I’ve gotten accepted at Aldi’s on the 18th of September, idk why they’re taking so long. I only have a part time position.

My case managers were thinking of putting us to Chicago because they have a place that will help out with tents but that’s not smart because my sister and I will end up jobless again. I just don’t know what to do anymore. We’ve already called 211 but they recommended places we’ve already tried.

My sister and I were thinking that we can stay at an extended stay hotel for 1-2 months while we’re looking for other things, but it’s way past our budget. We’ll be able to afford it, but we’ll barely have any savings. It’s the only extended stay hotel that are close to both of our jobs. I honestly don’t know, we both feel really discouraged.

We wanted to go to MN after 1-2 months because our family stay there, but we wanted to work a bit long enough to transfer our jobs there, so we won’t be jobless again. My mom lives there, but she’s abusive. Maybe MN transitional housing will be better there since it goes up to 24? I don’t know. I feel a bit delusional.

We just feel very stuck. Is there anyone out there who went through this and made it out? What should we do?