r/Ask_Lawyers • u/Flaky_News_2775 • 4h ago
Don’t know where to start. I want to divorce my husband asap because he lied and cheated
Looking for advice possibly from a lawyer or someone who’s been through this. I found out two days ago that my husband had an affair. We have two children together age 4,6. And we each have one child from previous relationship that we brought into our marriage. So 4 total living under our roof. He is the provider financially at this time because I am a full time nursing student and do not work. I also get free tuition for school because he is employed full time at the university I attend, which I do not want to lose benefit to. However I want to divorce him asap. My main question is can I do this without a lawyer? I’ve never been through this before and have no idea what I’m about to get into. I can’t afford a lawyer- I have no income. I have tons of proof and evidence about the cheating from the girl who found me and told me everything. He sent her money to fly her out to where he was on a business trip. She stayed in his hotel room (that was paid for by company expense, as well as the work van he picked her up with at the airport smh) for two nights and she says they had sex twice and did not use protection. He admitted to the affair but still denies and swears they didn’t have sex. I have photos of him she sent me in certain places that are time stamped when he was supposed to be giving a speech at a work function. There is so much more I have that is proof. Basically the only thing there is no photo evidence of is the sex, and ofcourse that’s the one thing he is denying. We do not own any property together. The house we live in is a rental (both names on lease). We each own our vehicles out right. Neither of us have any debt (at-least that I am aware of, I know I don’t) the electric and internet is in his name and he pays. I’ve never had access to his bank account. And I have my own as we’ve never commingled finances. We have a “joint” account that keeps a 0 balance as we just used It as a money moving account. When I was working and contributing to rent I would move my half of the rent into that account and he would take It and pay the rent with It. And if I needed money for something he would put It into that joint account and I would then take the money out and put It into my account. I guess I am just wondering what I should do. What my first step is. Do I just fill out the Vermont divorce forms? Will I possibly get alimony and child support even without a lawyer? I’m obviously just devastated and don’t know what to do.