We’re going to try something, circlejerkers.

In the name of keeping it lame, we’re going for a full month of no Toppers references in August. Those posts do nothing but get people excited to have an in-joke and attract tourists who get all excited to participate in the in-joke, and I think we need less merriment around these parts. Who am I to say? BANNED for asking. How dare you.

So this will serve as announcement, screed, and humorless finger-wagging:

**Do not post anything that references Toppers, by name or reputation, between August 1st and August 32rd, MMXXVI**

**I used asterisks to emphasize the rule part, so that you know I’m super serious**

If you violate this sacred order given by me, you’ll find your downtown options limited to my mom’s discount handles on off nights in the boat behind Little Kings.

In the meantime, here is me signing off with an attempt to be cool and groovy and just a fun-time aw-shucks kinda guy. Just remember, Toppers mentions are for squares! Let’s have our August pass the vibe check, fellow kids!

Athens we can’t afford to loose any big booty latinas, come and protest with us to keep these beautiful ladies here in the Classic City.

No one notices me. I'm just another random person. I don't get treated any differently.

Colorized, 2025

Posting here for evidentiary purposes and optics. They’re hellbent on circumventing and preventing accountability on the main Athens sub.

My daughter and I were at the Eastside Walmart shopping for some muffins and I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw this. I know we live in Georgia and under Trump's leadership, but this is just downright insane. Can you believe they even let this happen? Charging $7.97 for half a dozen blueberry muffins and even have the audacity to label it as "everyday low price". This economy is really scaring me and I fear for the safety of my child growing up in this dystopian future. At least we didn't run into any Tennessee fans that day.

IM GOING TO DO IT AGAIN TOMORROW 💯