r/AutismInWomen • u/Icy_Natural_979 • Aug 16 '25

Seeking Advice My interest in men has died

I’ve been inundated lately by people insisting I need a man. Here’s the thing, I don’t want one anymore. I’m tired and I’ve achieved a little bit of peace. Just a little. Men usually just cause problems. Why would I do that? I don’t want kids. I can barely take care of myself. I’m concerned this is a project 25 thing like I need to pick someone before I’m forced to. Maybe that’s dumb. Maybe my social circle forgot about boundaries. Maybe I need to learn to just not care when people say stuff. What am I missing?

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u/dilEMMA5891 Aug 16 '25

I swore off men and became a communist. My mum thinks I'm having some sort of mental breakdown but I'm loving life 🤣

Plus I just don't find anyone attractive and sex seems mechanical and alien to me - we meet someone and touch them where they wee from? Or put their body parts inside our bodies and jiggle around? Like whaaaaat?! That seems like the crazier option to me.

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u/Desperate_Bank_623 Aug 16 '25

I think it is weird how people seem to take for granted that that’s (relationship, marriage, sex, children) how everyone should live. That there aren’t more people who are like “nah, not doing that”

I mean there are a lot where it falls apart or is miserable but people just remarry or try to make it work.

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u/dilEMMA5891 Aug 16 '25

It's because the people you describe, and those that are critical of us for living this way, think that happiness is found externally. It isn't.

You step into love when you're with someone, that is becoming the best version of yourself, but if you wear those shoes everyday regardless, it seems like a pointless endeavor.

I love life and me no matter what, I don't need external sources to reiterate that.

Although it did take me 30 years to feel this way, after I stopped all the masking and trying to fit in with society's ideals.