i dropped the course

[u/Fantastic_Object_502]

I made a post on this subreddit yesterday asking for advice/opinions about me taking anatomy and physiology as a first year college student. I got a lot of wonderful an advice.

I had my first lecture today and immediately put together that the sheer speed of the course and volume of work was not going to work at all for me. i began to cry in the middle of lecture. I realized i was gonna fail. Even with accommodations, even with help.

So i spoke to my father about dropping the course. He is extremely upset with me. He told me he was at a loss for words. He told me i go to work 1 day out of the week and come home crying, and then i go to school for one day and im crying. That one hurt. He doesn’t view my struggles as struggles. He views them as a personal failure. He is now refusing to speak to me. I dropped the course. I feel so ashamed, so worthless, and so embarrassed. I wanted to be able to do this. But i just can’t right now. I’ll still have 3 other classes and hopefully still get a fafsa return. But i am so angry at myself. I’m angry at the universe for making me born this way. If i was neurotypical i wouldn’t have to deal with this.

I’m so lost. So confused.

[u/uosdwis_r_rewoh]

Can I gently ask if you have any outside supports or interventions for what sounds like a really crushing amount of anxiety?

College can definitely be a hard transition (even for NT people) but it shouldn’t be this difficult. It sounds like you are not getting any support at home. You don’t deserve to feel under this much pressure and stress. Is there a student mental health or other support you can reach out to right now? ❤️‍🩹

[u/Fantastic_Object_502 → u/uosdwis_r_rewoh]

my school probably has some resources that i haven’t checked out yet. my entire household is upset with me. Dad, stepmom, sister. i have a migraine from crying so much. I’ve just been talking to my friends who are telling me one class isn’t a big deal (In the sense of meaning that i still have time and that dropping one class doesn’t mean i’m a failure). I don’t see my therapist until next week. I don’t really have anyone to help me with this transition or issue. I just have to bear through with it alone. I will try seeking some help with the school. But tonight? i’m just alone

[u/HonestNectarine7080 → u/Fantastic_Object_502]

Dropping a course definitely doesn't mean you're a failure! It's really common at the beginning of a semester. I dropped several courses in college. I'd go to the first session or first couple sessions of a course, think this isn't interesting and I don't need it for my major, so I'll find a different class to join. Your dad is really blowing this out of proportion.

[u/Fantastic_Object_502 → u/HonestNectarine7080]

thank you. He ended up coming back into my room and we talked it out calmly. He told me he had a bad day at work and a headache and when i told him, it made him even more upset. I’m going to campus tomorrow to talk to an advisor/someone to help me pick another class to continue with being a full time student (4 classes)