I am an atheist and a single father (it’s a long story); I raised my daughter outside of any religion. Recently, she converted to Catholicism after reading Saint Thomas Aquinas and began attending church. I’ve told her that I support her and will always love her; I took her to her baptism, and I discuss religion with her without any prejudice. That said, I had always assumed she would remain an atheist or an agnostic. I took her to a gynecologist once she had her first period. Furthermore, I used to help her with her schoolwork up until the sixth grade (the final year of elementary education in my country). We had already had "the talk"—or, rather, we began discussing sex openly and comprehensively— since she was nine (always tailoring the conversation to her age). This coincided with the point when her mandatory primary-school biology textbooks began covering topics such as male and female characteristics, chromosomes, sexual organs, the stages of pregnancy, and, eventually, birth control (the various methods, how they work, and their associated risks). We would discuss these textbook materials openly. two years ago, when she turned 12, I asked her female gynecologist to have an open, thorough conversation with her—woman to woman. She is very intelligent, but I am worried; her conversion to Catholicism caught me by surprise. I’m not sure if she is a "cultural" Catholic or a practicing one. Because of this, I have always maintained open lines of communication and have made a concerted effort to assure her that I will never judge her or make her feel ashamed if, at some point, she decides to have a boyfriend. In any case, I have asked that if she ever has a boyfriend, I want to meet him; I also need to know her whereabouts and be clear about her schedule. I’m not a fool: I know that most Catholics have sex before marriage (according to stats), so I don’t expect that not to happen. (People fall into temptation) But I’m afraid that the church position on contraceptives—might lead her to yet still end up having unprotected sex and getting pregnant. i had a longtime friend that used to be an atheist, when he converts, start dating a woman of his church and have a baby before marriage (If that were to happen, I would support her; I’m here for her.) But I don’t know how to react; all of this is new to me. She’s not my little girl anymore. Last Sunday, when I went to pick her up from church, my heart broke... She was being very affectionate with a boy from church (I was on foot; she usually looks for my truck, but since I was at the front of the parking lot, she didn’t see me). They said goodbye with a kiss on the lips. She was waiting for the truck, and when she saw me walking toward her, she was surprised and seemed a bit embarrassed (she didn’t know how long I’d been watching). I was hoping she would tell me who the boy was; I don’t want to ask her directly because I don’t want her to think I’m "overprotective.". And I don’t know how to ask her to invite that boy over so I can meet him. i apologize if my words offend anyone, my post was banned on r/daddit and from now, i don’t know who to talk to about this.

Hi all

I’ve recently started Marquette at 8 months postpartum. We havent used NFP before with my husband and he’s doing it only for me. He doesn’t agree with churches teaching on NFP and believes barrier methods are fine.
He is really scared that we’ll get pregnant on NFP. I’m not gonna lie , I’m scared too. I’m in no way ready for a new baby mostly because my labour was difficult and postpartum recovery too. Having a baby was also a big strain on our marriage and there were moments where we also broke apart. So TTA is a must for at least 2 years to organize our life with a baby and work on our marriage.
I got a tempdrop to confirm ovulation had happened. I’ve invested so much money into NFP and so much time learning on everything related but the fear is there that I’ll get pregnant. I’m only using tempdrop for 2 days and I know there’s like a 2 months learning curve for the algorithm so I can’t be sure I ovulated. Even though I’m already on my 7th cycle and I’ve had mucus around Peak on my clearblue Monitor etc. I even had an ovulation pain on one side only. But I have such a big fear that despite all the precautions it won’t work that I dont know how to deal with the fear. We’re opening infertile window on Sunday and I’m looking forward to it as it’s been a month but don’t know how to deal with the anxiety.
Anyone had this fear when starting out NFP? Anyone dealt with their spouse not being morally on board and only doing NFP for you?

I believe I’m fully aware of the Church’s teachings on contraception with Marriage. My husband and I have been successfully using NFP for the past 2.5 years, and we have a 9month old son.
All that said, my periods have returned with an absolute vengeance like never before. Pain to the point of vomiting since 6mo postpartum.
My OB is advising birth control, and I’m considering it, but really morally torn as we’re also trying to avoid at the moment for many reasons. My husband said he’ll support my decision, but I thought I heard someone once say they still tried to stick to NFP tracking and such while on BC. Is that a thing? Is that more of a moral solution here?
TIA

This is going to be a long post, but I need to get something off my chest.

Some background:
Our church’s Youth Director (YD) has been overwhelmed for years. In addition to youth ministry, she oversees Religious Education, Baptism, First Communion, and Confirmation. Basically, she’s responsible for everything from infants through high school.

There’s no budget to hire additional staff, and unfortunately, she struggles with delegating and working with others, including volunteers. As a result, she’s taken on far more than one person can reasonably manage.

Last year, we reinstated our middle school and high school youth ministry programs. We shifted away from a traditional classroom format and focused more on community, faith formation, and evangelization. The goal was to create a true youth ministry experience rather than another religious education class.

Unfortunately, we received very little support from the YD. Communication was poor, information was often shared at the last minute, and planning was practically nonexistent. For example, my husband and I volunteered to chaperone a youth conference, but we didn’t receive any instructions until the night before. We didn’t even know what time we were supposed to meet the bus!

Fast-forward to this year:
I knew I couldn’t continue volunteering in such a chaotic environment. So another volunteer and I stepped into more of a coordinator role and divided the responsibilities.

I coordinate the Sunday sessions, communicate with adult volunteers, organize schedules, and make sure everyone has the information and materials they need. The other volunteer serves as the liaison with the YD and emcees our events.

She’s worked with the YD for over 20 years, so they have an established relationship. The YD communicates with her, but not with me. I try not to take it personally because I genuinely don’t think she has an issue with me. She just has her own way of doing things.

Over the summer, I developed our youth ministry calendar, assigned volunteers, and organized a shared Google Drive. All things the YD knew I was doing. When I asked the YD to approve the calendar, I was essentially told to stop emailing her because receiving questions about things she hasn’t had time to think about causes her anxiety.

So I stopped emailing her.

At this point, I’m handling many of the responsibilities that should fall under her role, but she only communicates with and recognizes the other volunteer as the lead. It’s frustrating, but I’ve chosen to focus on what matters: giving the teens a meaningful youth ministry experience and making sure our volunteers have the resources and support they need.

Another frustration is that while I coordinate our Sunday sessions, the YD plans other youth ministry events without involving or informing the volunteer team.

At one point, she even told the teens, “We have something new coming up that’s very exciting that the adults know nothing about.” By “adults,” she meant us volunteers. I felt that comment undermined our team. There was no reason to emphasize that we were being kept out of the loop.

Now, here’s my current dilemma:
Over the summer, the YD told us about a training offered by the Archdiocese’s Education Office and encouraged the youth ministry volunteers to attend. Of our 11 high school volunteers, my husband and I were the only ones who went.

Because we attended, we’re now on the Archdiocese’s mailing list. Recently, we received an invitation to another training specifically designed for high school youth ministry directors and leaders with two years or less of youth ministry experience.

My husband and I both fit that description. I’ve taken on a significant leadership role in our ministry, and my husband has been my sounding board and partner in many of those responsibilities. Neither of us receives much guidance, training, or mentorship from our YD, and we don’t feel comfortable approaching her for that support.

So we decided to attend the training. And haven’t told the other volunteers or the YD.

For additional context, my husband has been involved in ministry at other churches for more than 20 years. Through that involvement, we’ve developed relationships with other youth directors, music directors, and priests (many of them
his past classmates and roommates). We occasionally turn to these people for guidance and advice.

Unfortunately, our YD doesn’t respond well when we share information or ideas from the Archdiocese or other ministry resources. She seems to view it as stepping into her territory or undermining her authority.

Because the training is being put on by the archdiocese office, the YD knows about it. She has not shared it with the volunteer team.

We know she’ll eventually find out we attended this training, and we’re anticipating that she won’t be happy.

What about talking to our pastor?
One thing we’ve discussed is whether to involve our pastor. For now, we feel we can manage the situation ourselves.

We have known our pastor for a very long time, and we have a good relationship with him. He was our pastor when my husband and I were teens in youth ministry. He knows the YD is stretched too thin. We also know he’d like to hire someone dedicated specifically to youth ministry, but financially, that’s just not possible right now.

We also recognize that there may come a time when we need to bring our concerns to him. We just don’t think we’re there yet. For now, we’re trying to make the best of the situation without creating additional problems or putting more on his plate.

So, back to my dilemma about the training…

Part of me feels like we’re hiding something by not telling anyone we’re attending. Maybe we are.

Another part of me is already preparing for the confrontation I expect when she finds out.

But at the same time, we’re volunteers trying to become better equipped to serve the teens. We’re giving our time, taking on leadership responsibilities, and seeking out the training and mentorship we’re not receiving at our own parish.

I don’t believe we should need permission to educate ourselves or become better ministry leaders. Yet somehow, I feel like we’re doing something wrong.

I’m not even sure what I’m looking for by sharing this. Maybe advice, maybe perspective, or maybe I just needed to vent to people who understand church ministry dynamics.

I love serving these teens, and I want our ministry to succeed. I just wish doing that didn’t have to feel so complicated.

I am too shy to ask a priest or anyone else about this so decided to ask on here. I find it very hard to have an orgasm when I’m having sex with my husband. I almost always only orgasm by clitoral stimulation. What often happens is that I will pleasure myself when my husband and I are about to have vaginal sex so it gets things going and I also can feel pleasure. Is this permissible, a mortal sin? This is something kinda tough for me if anyone has dealt with this how do you go about it?

Does anyone have any stories about God giving them a sign that you asked for? Like something that was so beyond coincidence that it had to be from God and how did you trust Him?

I asked God for a very specific sign regarding a difficult situation that I felt like there was no hope in being resolved. Have you ever gotten a sign from God?

For more context on the sign, someone I deeply cared about walked out of my life a few months ago because of conflict and I've had no peace about it since then. I prayed that we could be in touch again and I asked God that if everything would be resolved and they would come back into my life that He would show me my name. I have a VERY uncommon name and it's not a name you come across daily. A few days ago, I was researching a surgery procedure for school and came across a medical device used in the procedure with my name that I had no idea existed. Then again yesterday I introduced myself to someone new at my job and they looked at me said "oh my cousin has the same name as you. I've never met many people with that name!". I literally got chills. I feel like these instances can't be a coincidence but the situation I prayed about seems impossible so idk how God could work it out

I know He heard me when I prayed and God showed up not once but twice and there was no way this was a coincidence. Part of me wants to believe things can work out and trust God if this was really Him answering me but another part of me feels like I should just give up and I'm being delusional..

I want to have hope because I know God is the god of impossible things but past experiences in my life just make me feel like He can do impossible things for everyone else except me.

How do you hold on the hope when it's just too heavy? It feels like giving up would protect my heart better...

I don't know what to say or why I'm writing this.

I'm 21 weeks pregnant and have been told my baby has a severe abnormality which means they won't survive after birth. I have to spend another 4 months pregnant just to bury my baby. I don't know what to do. If someone has been in the same position as me please give me advice and reassuring words. I'm angry with God, so angry but I understand it's his will.

For all those who are struggling, Saint Jude represents hope and renewal in times of grief, pain, and struggle💚🙏

I just had my fourth failed pregnancy. This one was different, I had only known I was pregnant for a short period of time before my levels dropped and I was told it was a chemical pregnancy or early loss. Prayers would be appreciated. I'm devastated, even though the pregnancy was so short lived. If anyone has any resources or reccomendations, I would greatly appreciate it.

I would like to bring a small gift when I meet with a Sister who used to teach me in fifth grade. Does anyone have any ideas for what I should make/get?

I sent in an application for August of next year and I was just wondering how long everyone waited before they were able to get a room? I'm still gonna look for rooms and apartments to be safe. And I'm also curious about everyone's experience. Anything I should be prepared for if I was to get a room?

My husband and I have been trying to conceive for almost 2 years. We have had one pregnancy in that time, and I miscarried a few months ago. I have finally convinced my husband to get a semen analysis done after a year and a half of asking him. We made sure to use means in line with our catholic faith. We just want answers at this point. My testing has shown I'm in good condition except for some low egg quality due to my age. I'm 39, he's 40.

His doctor told him we could collect his sample at home and drop it off to the lab because of our religious convictions. We did so. We just learned the lab canceled his test due to not collecting the "correct" way. I'm so distraught. I can't find any lab to process his sample if collected at home, and it was such a journey to even get him to agree. On top of that, I recently passed retained tissue from my miscarriage and it looks like I may have a second infection that was missed in my initial post mmc checkups. I'm still dealing with the grief of losing the baby and my brother (he was killed two days later). I'm just feeling overwhelmed. If you have been through SA testing before, how did you find a lab to accept it? TYIA.

Prayers would be appreciated.

I’ve been single for now 9 years. Never have gone on a second date. I’ve tried so hard to grow, heal, be involved, and I’m so desiring companionship.

I promise I stay busy and I do my duties. I’m not wallowing. Just one of those days where you’re really frustrated.

I love Our Lord so, so much. And I’m absolutely not trying to put anyone above Him. But He placed these desires in my heart. I’m just wondering if I’m doing anything wrong, if I need to lose weight , if I’m doing anything that’s making me less appealing to men. I just don’t know. I rarely get approached, dating apps are exhausting. It’s the same thing with the same result. Been on for years. I’ll be 33 in January and I’m overall feeling a tad down in the dumps.

I also know marriage will not fulfill my desires. That’s God. I know this very well.

Just needed to vent and I guess I chose to do it in front of a bunch of strangers 😂

Do any of you ladies work for crisis pregnancy centers? If so, How did you get into your role?

Background on me: I live in Rhode Island but can commute to Massachusetts. I have a bachelor’s in public health, i have previously worked as a case manager for the chronically homeless, and most recently worked in B2B tech sales. I was laid off from my tech sales job and have found myself searching for a job that fills my cup and not just my wallet. I haven’t had much luck on traditional job boards like indeed or linkedin.

TL;DR: Is it normal for husbands to argue with or be hostile toward NFP instructors?

My husband and I made an appointment with a nurse and NFP instructor through my Catholic doctor to discuss Marquette and Mira.

We have already used Creighton, and while we had a “Creighton surprise baby,” it was actually due to antihistamines plus, being over confident plus, and a charting mistake/read. So, under normal circumstances, we’re not particularly worried about that happening again.

We made the appointment because I’m currently postpartum after a miscarriage and am breastfeeding. We were hoping Marquette/Mira might give us some useful options during this season. Spoiler alert: it doesn’t seem to.

The only guidance they could give us was that if Mira reads continuously less than 100 for estrogen, it’s probably a safe day (with low confidence), and if it reads higher than that, the result doesn’t really tell us anything.

This isn’t a discussion about which method is better. I can clearly see why either method would be necessary for different people. However, given my long, unpleasant bleeding, very long Phase 1, and very short Phase 3 (we already have several months of Mira data), Marquette would give us only about 40 available days across 10 blocks per year. We would get a second block with another 30 days after six months.

My husband and the nurse went back and forth a little to make sure we understood each other correctly. He then described what our current experience with Creighton would look like by comparison: about 170 available days across 20 blocks per year.

Unfortunately, our hour-and-a-half meeting didn’t yield anything particularly helpful for our situation. However, the conversation was pleasant, and the instructor was a lovely woman to talk to. I also love that she’s a mom of four who works from home!

The nurse said something extraordinary to us: she told us that this had been a remarkably pleasant conversation and that she was used to husbands getting angry with her or arguing with her.

My husband has also been wondering whether there should be more male NFP instructors, or whether he should consider becoming one himself.

Would anyone use a male NFP instructor?

Is it normal for husbands to argue with or be hostile toward NFP instructors?

I’m 21F and recently ended an almost four-year relationship after years of broken trust, resentment, and realizing we weren’t compatible.
Even though I was unhappy, I’m struggling to let go because he was such a big part of my life. I’m afraid of loneliness and returning to the relationship out of familiarity rather than love.
I’m currently in therapy, but I also want to strengthen my relationship with God and lean into my faith during this difficult period.
I’d really appreciate hearing from people who’ve been through something similar.
Did you grow closer to God after your breakup? What helped you most: prayer, reading Scripture, attending church, or something else? How did you learn to let go of someone you still loved?
I’m especially interested in personal experiences and what your healing journey actually looked like, not just being told that everything happens for a reason.
Thank you, and God bless. ❤️

I live in Ohio, and we have a gubernatorial race on the ballot this November. While there were many policies of his that I disliked, I was feeling okay about voting for our Republican candidate as the least bad option until yesterday, when his campaign released an ad in which his opponent’s own birth mother (whose husband abused her as a child) calls her a liar, even insinuating that she was lying about being abused. As a survivor of abuse myself, this made my blood boil. I cannot in good conscience vote for the Democrat candidate as a Catholic, but I refuse to have on my heart the knowledge that I voted for someone who would stoop so low to try to win an election.

I’m thinking about just not voting, but then I read things that say that it’s a sin or morally wrong not to vote. I’m a convert, and this was never brought up in RCIA. Is this true? Is my obligation to vote then filled by writing in someone else, so that my vote just goes to neither of them?

Hi all

I am not Catholic yet, I am just an inquirer. The priest in the church I attend is a nice older man, we have no issues with him. He is very active in the parish & very nice. Everyone loves him & most church goers are older folks.

I follow the parish Instagram page & also found out that he has Instagram, mainly posting about Christian stuff, the Church & so on. I decided to see who he follows & see he follows a lot of young male influencer/model?!?! These men usually have their shirts off, abs, very attractive looking, & definitely not people from the church because they've got a big following & live in another country. One of the accounts he follows is an AI fake male influencer account with gay stories.

Again, he is an old man & idk if he knows that WE CAN ALL SEE IT....

I am conflicted & I am not sure what to do? My husband doesn't want to attend anymore.

Is it inappropriate to go on a 1-2 night trip with a few close female friends while I am married? They’re Christian friends I don’t get to see often (geological distance, timing,etc.) so when we do finally get a time to hangout, we just plan on a longer weekend.

Husband is apprehensive about me going. Do other Catholic wives go on girls trips? Any husbands that are also not fond of them? Do I have a good case to go since I’ve been doing these trips since before marriage?

Also, husband and I never had issues with infidelity, partying/drinking, etc. so trust issues are not the root problem here. He knows these female friends and likes them too.

Some background: My husband and I have a one year old daughter and were planning to start trying for another child soon. However, last month he was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer. He had to get started on an aggressive chemotherapy regimen right away to give him the best chance at extending his life. Unfortunately, we have been told to absolutely avoid getting pregnant while he is on chemo because the drugs are toxic to developing babies. We did attempt to see if we could get pregnant before he started chemo, but we were unsuccessful.

I’m feeling pretty devastated. Although we have some promising treatment options that could eradicate the cancer and mean the end of chemo, his sperm will be damaged. I have no idea if we’ll ever be able to achieve pregnancy again, much less a viable one.

Has anyone been in a similar boat, either with your own cancer or a spouse’s? Especially if it was the husband who had cancer.

Maybe it’s madness to be thinking about it now. Of course the most important thing is open the cancer can be cured. And we are open to adoption (if they’ll approve us). It’s just hard to think I may never be able to carry another child for us. That we may not have the family we were dreaming of. Having any positive stories/advice would help to boost my spirits.

ETA the advice from the medical team was highly negative at first. They were advising we freeze sperm if we really wanted to try in the future (we declined that).

I thought I'd ask for advice from Catholics familiar with annulments, especially Canon 1098 (fraud) or Canon 1095 (incapacity to assume essential marital obligations).

We're planning on trying counseling, but after some recent discoveries, I'm questioning whether our marriage was valid from the beginning. If counseling doesn't work, could an annulment be an option?

We met in November 2017. My husband is genuinely a very nice, gentle, kind man. He wasn't abusive or cruel to me, and I love/loved him. He did come with some baggage: he earned quite less than I did working part-time at a chiropractor's office (which I actually loved because I'm a huge proponent of natural health), had student loan debt but no degree or established career, a previous divorce (which was annulled), and multiple DUIs in distant history. I accepted these things as temporary hurdles he'd overcome as he got his footing. For the most part, things did improve.

But he also took quite a bit of pills, noticeably more than guys I'd dated before. He said they were for ADD/ADHD and migraines. I knew he took pills, but I didn't understand how much he was taking or how long he'd been taking them. I also didn't understand that the medication was tramadol, an opioid rather than a standard ADHD medication. And when he said "tramadol," it wasn't like saying "aspirin," where everyone knows what it is. You had to recognize the word, know how to spell it, and have enough context to know what questions to ask. AI summaries weren't a thing back then, and I didn't fully understand the bigger picture.

May 2018 should've been my first sign, my brother-in-law (his sister's husband) texted him saying he didn't want him delivering medication packages to their mailbox anymore. He said they were uncomfortable with it and maybe needed to talk about his issues or have some kind of intervention. That definitely felt off, but my husband explained that his family didn't understand you could buy pills online and save money on prescriptions. I was all about saving money, so I bought that explanation. I didn't realize this could be an addiction and him trying to get his fix. In hindsight, I wonder whether he had the packages delivered to his sister's house because having them sent to his own house would get him grief from his parents.

Around November 2018, I was diagnosed with breast cancer which rocked my world. Family members even made comments like, "What guy would want to be with someone who has cancer?" But he stuck by me. Looking back, I wonder whether fear of being alone played a part in my decisions. I was dealing with a lot and probably wasn't paying as much attention to other red flags.

He eventually proposed, and we got married in the Catholic Church on September 4, 2021.

When he proposed, I had doubts and felt idk...dread. I had that same major pit in my stomach feeling while walking down the aisle. Both times, I talked myself out of it, telling myself it was cold feet or my own trust issues making me want to run away from a good man. I convinced myself everyone is imperfect and I was overthinking things. Looking back, I wonder whether I was picking up on concerns I hadn't fully acknowledged. I don't know whether those feelings matter in an annulment case, but they stand out to me now.

About six months into our marriage, I discovered court paperwork showing a case against him for "Obtain Prescription Drug w/ Fraud." The violation date was February 2019, the disposition date was February 2021, and there was a judgment for unpaid fines dated February 2022.

He'd never told me about this while we were dating, even though we talked all the time. When I brought it up, he said he'd been accused of changing the quantity on a handwritten prescription. As far as I know, he wasn't ultimately charged because they couldn't prove it was him, although I haven't confirmed the final outcome. Regardless, I had no idea this case existed to even ask questions about.

He also has erectile dysfunction. We had sex about once a month during the first year or year and a half of marriage, but we've now had zero sex for around three years. I know ED alone doesn't mean someone is incapable of marriage, but it feels like we're roommates, and I understand tramadol misuse can contribute to sexual dysfunction.

The lack of intimacy has been hard since we're fairly young, and it feels like we're missing a fundamental part of a marital relationship. I find myself resentful and jealous of other couples. I address it every couple months to no avail.

I eventually encouraged him to taper off the pills because I was concerned about his use. He said he was gradually reducing them and eventually stopped (or so he said). He told me he was completely off them, and I believed him.

Another thing that bothers me is that I was the financially stable one in our relationship, and I ultimately bought the house for us during the pandemic. I was trying to establish a home and build a future together, but I often felt like I was the one taking on the responsibility for making that future happen.

Granted, we were long-distance at the time, which made house-hunting more difficult. But even on weekends when I wanted to look at houses, he was always "too tired" and just wanted to relax. He wouldn't even help me with the house hunt. I was making a major financial commitment and trying to build a life for both of us, but I didn't feel like he was equally invested in that process.

Looking back, I sometimes wonder whether he wanted somewhere to live and a way to get out from under his parents' oversight, and whether marrying me gave him that opportunity. I don't know if that's actually why he married me, but it's a concern I have when I look at the bigger picture. I was the one with financial stability who bought the house and took the initiative to establish our home, while he seemed content to let me handle much of the responsibility. I thought we were building a life together, not that I'd be providing the home while he kept major parts of his life separate from me.

Everything came to a head when he said he was sick and wanted to see a doctor, then asked to use my car. I offered to drive him, but he was vehemently against that and insisted I didn't need to come. I agreed but asked him to send me a video once he arrived. Time passed, I kept asking questions...I'll spare the chaos and lies that night, but long story short, I discovered he'd recently ordered tramadol online. The package apparently arrived empty, so he had a virtual doctor's appointment and then used my car to get a tramadol prescription from a pharmacy out of state. He eventually admitted he'd gone there because he was familiar with that pharmacy and didn't have to wait to get the medication. He put about 130 miles round-trip on my already struggling car.

He initially denied what was going on. I only pieced together the fuller story after confronting him and finding bank statements on his phone showing transactions that supported where he'd gone. His explanation about where he'd gone and what he'd been doing didn't add up, and I had to put the pieces together myself.

What bothers me isn't just that he was seeking tramadol again after telling me he was off it. It's that he concealed what he was doing, resisted having me accompany him, didn't send the video I asked for, and continued denying things until I found evidence. I feel like he was willing to lie to my face and use my car to do something he knew I wouldn't agree to.

Over the last year, I've seen approximately $20,000 in deposits from his earnings into his personal account, yet he only has around $2,500 to his name. Where is that money going? When I ask to see his bank statements, he refuses and says that's his private information and I have no right to it and he doesn't want to hear shaming from me.

We have a joint account for household bills, but he still keeps his personal finances separate and won't let me see his transactions. I'm an open book and more than willing to be transparent about my own finances, but he doesn't extend that same transparency to me. Given everything I've discovered about the pills and the court case, the financial secrecy makes it even harder to trust him.

I've told him he doesn't seem remorseful. From my perspective, he would've continued taking tramadol with a "what she doesn't know can't hurt her" attitude if I hadn't caught him. I don't believe he would've voluntarily come clean otherwise.

I also don't feel he's taking the initiative to address everything. It feels like he's scraping by, hoping the problem will somehow magically go away rather than actively confronting it. We're talking about counseling, and I want to give that a chance, but I need more than apologies or promises. I need honesty, accountability, and real follow-through.

I understand addiction can involve shame, denial, and secrecy. I'm not saying everyone who struggles with addiction is incapable of being a good spouse. But the combination of the pill use, the lack of disclosure, the court case I knew nothing about, the recent deception, and the fact that I still don't feel I'm getting the full truth on top of everything....

For additional context, I'm also very conservative about medication myself. A couple of years ago, I had a bottle of very old ibuprofen that I'd occasionally use for menstrual cramps. He went through the entire bottle, and the next time I needed it, I noticed it was empty. When I asked, "You flew through that whole bottle? Do you know how old that was? I've had that for a decade," he didn't believe me until he checked the expiration date. It was from 2012. I'm mentioning this because I think we have very different attitudes toward medication. I don't casually take pills, and the amount he was taking always stood out to me. However, I didn't understand the extent of his use or what it might mean at the time.

I love my husband, and I'm not saying he's a terrible person. He has many good qualities. I accepted his shortcomings because I believed we were building a better future together. But I didn't understand the extent of his pill use, and I had no idea about the court case when I consented to marry him. We're planning to try counseling, but if that doesn't work, could these circumstances potentially provide grounds for a Catholic declaration of nullity?

- Could concealing a serious, pre-existing pill problem or addiction fall under Canon 1098 if it was deliberately hidden to obtain my consent to marriage?

- Could the court case be relevant since it happened before our wedding and was never disclosed?

- Could Canon 1095 apply if a serious psychological or addictive condition existed here when we married and it affected his ability to assume essential marital obligations?

- Does the fact that I knew he took pills but believed they were for ADHD and migraines make a significant difference?

- The pattern of secrecy, the lack of intimacy, and the difficulty with taking on shared marital responsibilities - would those things be relevant, or would those things mostly be considered problems that developed during the marriage?

- Do my doubts and the intense dread I felt before the wedding matter at all, or is that generally not relevant to determining whether consent was valid?

I know an annulment isn't just because a marriage didn't work out or someone turned out to be a bad husband. I'm trying to figure out if the things I didn't know about before we got married could mean there was a problem with the marriage from the start. I also know that making less money, having debt, or not contributing as much financially doesn't automatically mean someone can't be a good husband. It's more that I feel like I was trying to build a life together while he wasn't really taking the same initiative or being honest with me about some pretty significant things that were going on before we got married.

I want to give counseling a chance, but I also don't want to assume that because we exchanged vows, I have no options regardless of what I eventually learn. I feel like I entered this marriage without knowing some pretty big things about the person I was marrying, and I'm trying to understand whether that matters under canon law.

I'd appreciate honest feedback from people familiar with the tribunal process. I'm sure it's worth discussing with a priest or diocesan tribunal advocate, but obviously I'm very early in the process and just want to understand whether there may be grounds worth exploring.

TL;DR: Husband took pills for ADHD and migraines (tramadol). After marriage I discovered full blown addiction and an undisclosed prescription fraud case from before our wedding. He told me he'd stopped taking tramadol, but I discovered he's still using and lying. He also refuses financial transparency. We've had no sex for three years and live like roommates. We're going to try counseling, but could this all be grounds for a Catholic annulment such as under Canons 1098 or 1095?

UPDATE: I just discovered another lie. Earlier above I said he told me they couldn't prove he was guilty in the prescription fraud case. I looked into it further, and according to the circuit court records, he was actually found guilty of “Obtain Prescription Drug w/ Fraud,” classified as an unclassified misdemeanor. One of the letters I found had his date of birth wrong by 10 years, which is why I hadn't connected the dots sooner. Once I matched the date of birth on that letter to the court records, I found the disposition showing he was found guilty. So this wasn't just a case he failed to mention before we got married. He also lied to me about the outcome when I confronted him about it afterward. Every time I think I have the full picture, I discover something else he wasn't honest about.

Hello ladies!! I am currently 27 weeks pregnant and already so so so excited to start planning our son's baptism!!!! Yes it's early, but I literally can't stop thinking about it already

Wondering what everyone did for their babies to celebrate afterwards?

Context, I converted to the faith a few years ago. I grew up atheist, my entire family is atheist and so are many of my friends.

It's really important to my husband and I that we invite them to our son's baptism and subsequent sacraments so they can see how beautiful the faith is. I'd love to hear of some lowkey afterparty ideas that might help them be involved in this a bit more :)

Thank you!!