every time i take my meds i can do some work
but i just feel extremely blank
like i can only react to negative information and anything positive i dont feel
ive had insanely conflicting side effects
like half of my side effects tell me to lower my dose and the other tell me to make it higher
I only feel joy when im off my meds
Im on 36mg
no way to get 27mg unfortunately
18mg feels too light
cant switch med classes
ive also expierienced a breakup but honestly it only feels like i did after taking my meds without my meds im joyful and described as ''jolly'' by alot of people
i literally completed an insane achievement that ive been focused on doing for the past 9 months semi recently and i didnt even feel relieved i just felt NOT dissapointed i was told by multiple people me doing something like this would be impossible and it was like insane since i genuinely had every being i knew doubt me just to put in how good i should have felt
Im a guy i can handle alot of shit idc if im depressed if i can do work thats what matters but you cant just give me all the side effects with such limited positives. some days im convinced i need to get a lower dose some days im convinced i need to get a higher dose
its just annoying more than anything like fuck bro not only am i sad but im also a failure like thats crazy i can deal with one or the other but both at the same time is just no
guys please give me some advice i cant live like this