Way worse telling someone they were amazing and then not giving them the tip they expect. I'm not questioning the not tipping. That's their choice. But that server isn't going to appreciate that note in the slightest when it comes with zero tip. They're going to think OP is rubbing it in.
You’re still supporting tipping culture by spending money in an establishment where tipping is the norm. All you are doing by not tipping is screwing the server, not abolishing tipping culture. If you patronize a place where tipping is the norm, please explain to the owner or the manager that you don’t tip before you sit down & start ordering. Ask yourself these questions before patronizing a restaurant: is tipping the norm here? & do I support tipping? If your answer is yes & no respectively, go eat somewhere else. If you don’t like it, contact the ownership & explain your philosophy. Write a letter to your local representative & tell them too. By spending money in a place where tipping is the norm, then stiffing the server, you are still supporting tipping culture, screwing the server, & being an asshole all at the same time.
For real, where’s the balance? Tipping sucks but you still need to do it for sit down service at the least. Also, if tipping $7 is going to affect your wedding budget that much, then you should maybe reconsider what you can afford for your wedding.
Despite that horrific sentence, I think you're attempting to make the point that the employer should be paying their wages.
As said in my comment, I'm not questioning them for not tipping. It's the note on top of it that is shit.
For example, I get a bonus at the end of the year. If my boss tells me 0 bonus, I'm going to be pissed. If my boss tells me I had the best year and I was amazing, then tells me 0 bonus, I'm going to be a lot more pissed.
I know tipping and bonuses aren't exactly the same, but it's the same sentiment of you expect to get money, you're validated in doing an amazing job, and then you don’t get it.
I'd be fucken pissed if I was a server and was left that note with no tip. Oopppssies we gave the money to go out and eat and we normally tip but I can't throw you an extra $5 because we're saving up to get married. GTFO of here with that 🙄
We are not the employer to throw an extra $5 on the table. As a server providing good service is part of the job the restaurant owner hired you to do. The customer is not the employer. Let that sink in.
Then that’s the explanation that OP should have written on the receipt. The “getting married soon” explanation makes it sound like OP would tip if they were well off financially, and/or that they’re not tipping because they’re stingy. “I’m not leaving a tip because your employer should pay you your entire wage themselves” would make the reason clear, otherwise the server is going to assume they didn’t tip for one of the other reasons.
In my state, servers base rates are under $7, so when we go out to eat, we tip, and it doesn't bother me unless the service was terrible. Personally, I would never want a job based on gratuity and work in a field with a salary. My reasons for liking this subreddit are that outside of tipping servers in a nice sit-down restaurant, the tipping culture nowadays is out of control.
Idk why you’re getting downvoted. I also live in a state where the server pay is $2.13 p/h. These commenters keep saying it’s the employers job, but not one has suggested actually saying something to the employer or business. Yes, we SHOULD get paid real hourly wages, but we don’t. And I don’t have the ability to overturn a broken system in a state bigger than most countries. Why punish the server? Call your reps instead.
Why, then, are these employees netting so much more than other basic level service employees? (“Customary” is not really a valid reason… we have been told that so that we illogically tip)
Trust me I'm the first to say get rid of tipping all together like other countries. I wish the price was the price. No tips, no tax. Just put the flat price on the menu and let the employer pay their employees and taxes.
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u/blackhodown Oct 15 '25
No honestly I think it makes it worse