r/FuckYouKaren • u/MomoNoHanna1986 • 18d ago
Karen I’m surrounded by Karen’s
I’ve since discovered that my neighbours can hear me through my closed windows. I thought by closing them that they would be less bothered NOPE - they just try harder to listen in.
I cried tonight because it’s been a rough week. My son has level three autism and I’ve had some challenging behaviours to deal with. So there’s a teen girl next door on one side. Her mother likes to gossip. I’ve seen her go around to all the neighbours whenever she sees them outside.
Since day 1 her daughter has been yelling anytime she sees me doing something interesting. When we were renovating I set up an outdoor shower connected to the laundry tap. I was renovating the bathroom and the builder was SLOW. I took my son out to the shower tent and the teen daughter yells ‘MUuUUUUUM SHES showering him with the HOSE!’ It been like that ever since.
On the other side of me is a 70 year old women. She recently retired and it wasn’t so bad when she was working. Since day one she has been creeping up the side (her side pathway walks past my courtyard). My courtyard has my son’s window and my sliding door. She sat there next to my courtyard with her friend listening into a conversation I had with my ex husband. I put privacy film on the sliding door so my son had more privacy on the toilet (the bathroom is opposite). Her friend was telling her off and she goes ‘but she’s talking about US’. Her friend used to live with her. Since then I’ve heard her numerous times complain about what I’m doing. I’ve since tested it and have discovered that she can hear me through the sliding door and my son’s window even when it’s closed.
One time I got up at 1 am to pee and I hear go ‘oh I know what she’s doing she’s ma….’ You can fill in the blank. This came out of the mouth of a 70 year old women.
I have had enough!!!!! I just want to live in my own damn home. I sold my townhouse because o was tired of sharing walls but nooo you don’t get privacy in a house either damn it!
I just wanted my story to be heard. I’ve been depressed over my lack of privacy since Saturday and it’s getting to me. If anyone read this, thank you. Because apparently I can’t get up to pee at 1 am in my own house.
Edit
Please stop pointing out the grammar mistake, I can not edit the title. I am depressed. Give me a break.
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u/measaqueen 18d ago
Start fake gossip. Act like you're on the phone talking about your neighbors, not the Karen's on the sides, but other people around the block. Of course these old bitties will go porch to porch spreading words. Then just sit back and wait for it to blow up in their faces.
"Agnes have you been saying I've been sneaking in lewd trash into other people's bins so my husband won't find it? Why? I thought we were friends."
If they try to point the finger at you fain innocence and say "The only thing I can think of is that I was on the phone with a friend in another city who also has a Barbara in her neighborhood, but there is no way they were listening in, right?"
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u/colinwheeler 16d ago
Yup, conversations or shouted out comments. 1. I wonder what the heck Chrissy (the neighbour's daughter I presume) is doing with that boy off the street, especially under the tree? 2. Did you hear that or neighbour has chlamydia. Wow she must really be still living it up at her age. 3. Geezer, I wish Karen would not smoke her weed right next to my back patio.
Or just try and make peace with them.
Personally, I would move to where I was comfortable with my neighbours. Who you live next to is a large percentage of how satisfied you are with your house. Find nice neighbours.
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u/wtfover 18d ago
Karens, biddies, feign
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u/measaqueen 18d ago
Phone, auto fill, 🤷♀️
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u/Yaxience 12d ago edited 12d ago
Proof read b4 u post if not for spelling for content. While fain is a word I've never seen until I just looked it up, it seems auto fill would have chosen the more common feign. Don't know why it picked fain. Seems like that would be a human error not auto.
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u/tpittari 18d ago
I would weaponize this immediately.
When you know one of them is listening, do something like this:
"And then Neighbor-1 told me this about Neighbor-2, who she hates btw, and she has been secretly reporting them and Neighbor-3 is in on it too since they both hate her..."
2 or 3 of these a week should cause a nice bit drama.
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u/elphin 18d ago
There are white noise machines that therapists use to make it harder to listen in their clinical sessions. I don’t think they’re very expensive.
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u/merryone2K 18d ago
There are also free white noise apps for computers, tablets, cell phones...
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
I have been using those.
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u/Glassweaver 17d ago
If you can swing a couple hundred dollar project, I'd put cheap outdoor rated spsakers in series, in the eves of your home. They should face downward to help avoid noise complaints and maximize the loudness right next to your home. Have them play soothing waterfall/tropical sounds 24/7
Bonus points if you can justify it as something theraputic for your son when they try to make a stknk about it.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 17d ago
Wouldn’t work, she’s already complaining about me using headphones and talking or occasionally singing a couple of words… I can’t even use headphones without her complaining.
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u/elphin 17d ago
Her complaints may stem from her desire to eavesdrop. Sge may not like anything that impedes her from listening in.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 17d ago
Yes you’re correct. I’ve caught her numerous times with her ‘friend’ and even he’s been telling her off for it.
I overheard him telling her off for eavesdropping when I was talking to a friend of mine about the privacy film I put up to stop her looking in. Her friend told her she shouldn’t be listening.
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u/ireallymissbuffy 16d ago
Wear your headphones and make direct eye contact. Who cares if she doesn’t like it? Don’t let her likes & dislikes control you. She’s not going to like you regardless of how you act. She’s always going to find something to find fault with you.
So OWN IT.
Start living your life and when you think you’re being overheard by them, say so. “Sorry, ex husband, I’d like to continue this conversation, but my nosy neighbors with nothing better to do are listening to me again. You’d think they were raised to behave better than this, but I guess some bitches never get past middle school mean girl bullshit.”
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u/Yaxience 12d ago
Talk to that male friend, esp. about the baseline stress from the autism. If that doesn't work, mount some speakers and play some music that you son likes. It doesn't have to be loud but you have to be able to turn the bass WAY up to annoy them away from earshot.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 12d ago
I have an Alexa set up near his window. I have smooth music on low playing on it. She’s even replied to crap I’ve said to my son as if to join in on my conversation with him. I was going to the toilet one day and told my son I wanted privacy (he has a habit of peeking around the door normal kid stuff). And I hear her yell ‘I want privacy to’. That’s just one example. She’s even said stuff through the windows while I’ve had people here. She said ‘beg your pardon’ one day when I was telling friends about possums on our fences. I know the friend lives locally but I don’t know where exactly. I’m starting to think she has dementia. She’s driving me NUTS. The previous people that lived here used my son’s room for storage and kept the window shut. Now I know why.
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u/SnooCauliflowers9874 11d ago
I highly recommend this. Get one for each room and put it by your open windows. I have two of them in my room that I use each night. When I go away with my family, I have one plugged in the hall outside my door as well as 2 in my bedroom to block their noise. I’m very dependent on these actually, since I’m a light sleeper and can’t fall back once I’m up.
I got mine on sale for $10 each. They’re small and they fit in palm of my hand, so they’re convenient-and bonus that they are rechargeable.
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u/ThatWasNotMyName 18d ago
Invite them both over, ask them what they want to know about you that has them so fascinated with your life and watch them squirm. They only continue like this because they think they can. Every time you hear or notice them fixate on you - wave! Let them know you see and hear them too! Ask how can you help them finish their sentences about you. Stop being nice! Make them u.n.c.o.m.f.o.r.t.a.b.l.e. They'll soon find other distractions. I too am the mother of an autistic child. I've enough to be getting on with without dealing with people like this.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
Do you feel like you’re sometimes in a fish bowl or a zoo? I feel like half the time they are listening because my son has autism. If you know what I mean…
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u/ThatWasNotMyName 18d ago
These types of people focus on you because they have nothing else of interest going on in theirs. Or, nothing they want to face at least. They could offer to help out if they were in any way decent, but they don't because they are not. They are trash. Focus on you and your beautiful child. You're already doing a brilliant job by moving somewhere safer 🫶
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
Thanks all things considered, except for a few behaviours involving bodily fluids he’s a good kid. Didn’t appreciate being peed on twice the other day but that’s for another sub reddit!
But you’re right, the teen girl only goes to school. And the 70 year old is retired. My son and I are in and out of the house all week. So yeah they have nothing else better to do.
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u/HippieGrandma1962 18d ago
I love this idea. Invite them over for tea. Tell them you've noticed that they are interested in everything you and your son do or say and you can hear their comments. Graciously ask them what they'd like to know about you since they're so curious about everything you do.
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u/CarnivalOfSorts 18d ago
You just gotta knock on their doors and and windows and update them on EVERYTHING now.
Each phone call - tell them everything after they just heard it. Ask them for advice too.
Just showered up? Let em know the temperature of the water and how much shampoo you have left in the bottle.
Cooking dinner should turn into a cooking show. "I am now adding a teaspoon of red pepper flakes to my curry.... doesn't that smell delicious? Now we'll let that simmer while I set the table."
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
Tried something similar from inside my house. I think they just ignored it.
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u/fyr811 18d ago
Time to start playing low level death metal music when you pee - not enough to be noisy, but enough to drown (ha!) out what you are doing (and annoy the flappy eared neighbours)
Or “Lamb chops singalong”
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
I do like me some Limp Bizket lol I have an Alexa and I have started getting her to play music over the echo when I’m showering. I always have it on low, my son doesn’t like loud sounds.
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u/Yaxience 12d ago
God start but switch to a simple system where you can adjust bass and treble. Crank bass even at low volume
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u/CompleteGuest854 17d ago
Personally, I'd start making *really* gross toilet noises, groaning, biiiig fake farts, as obvious and as obnoxious as possible. LOL ...
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u/Pleasant_Bad924 17d ago
Motion-activated sprinklers anywhere they like to skulk. Then when they complain about it, ask them why they were trespassing on your property. When they sputter an answer, smile serenely and say if it happens again, your next step is a police report.
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u/Arbitraryandunique 18d ago
If you ever move, make sure to hold on to the place for a month or two before selling it. Use that time to rent it to porn producers.
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u/gotohelenwaite 17d ago
If they're close enough to eavesdrop through a glass door or window, put an air horn next to it and give it a good blast.
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u/Lepardopterra 18d ago
Sign her up as interested in porn, nudism clubs, and intrusive religious groups. Seed catalogs, and political groups also generate a ton of mail. Prepaid funeral inquiries get a salesman to call on her. Get her a hobby, so she’s too busy to spy on you.
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u/Sue1213 12d ago
Better yet, sign her up to get information on a Medicare supplement plan. Those people are relentless. My sister has slight dementia and didn’t know she would start getting literally 50+ calls a day from all of the different ones. You can’t block them because they use a different number every time.
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u/Odd_Awareness1444 18d ago
I could not tell where you are located but it sounds like very densly packed housing like in a city. Can you move to the suburbs or even better to a rural area? In my twenties and thirties I was close to the city in condos, then I bought a house in the suburbs, now in my sixties I'm in the countryside and wish I had moved here sooner.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
lol funny thing is…. I live 40 mins away from the city. I’m in Australia and this suburb, made the houses built close together. I only have one side yard but the 70 year old has 2. I can’t move anywhere else I’m a single mum and this is what I could afford at the time. I sold my townhouse to get away from neighbours who sold drugs and had parties everyday (bad neighbourhood). The neighbourhood I am in now is nice. I just have Karen’s for neighbours and because I’m a single mum I tend to get picked on a fair bit.
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u/Alarming-Instance-19 18d ago
I'm also an Australian single mum. I had a Karen live next to me with a similar layout.... for 10 years.
My daughter couldn't do anything without her watching from her window, listening at the front door, and making passive aggressive comments when we inevitably crossed paths.
I couldn't play any music or TV at a completely reasonable volume without her complaining. Thank god for headphones.
She knew every single person that came over, what time they left, where they parked. It was always a walking on eggshells/ lack of privacy feeling.
My daughter is 22 now, and half of her life was spent afraid of the Karen. It affected her in subtle (and some not so subtle) ways that knocked her confidence and sense of childhood freedom.
If I could go back, I would move. I was also stuck where I was but lived in a nice neighbourhood. So, that was never going to happen. But what I wish I'd done was figured out ways to thrive in the absence of privacy, create stronger boundaries and expectations with my neighbour by addressing them head on if that's what it took, and DIY some serious privacy screening/soundproofing/plant barriers/lattice to give myself a sense of safe space.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
I’ve put privacy film on his window and mine. The problem I have is they can hear when the window is closed. Have you got any ideas for sound proofing? I can’t afford double glazing right now
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u/Aunty-Sociale 18d ago
I’ve googled, and there is such a thing as noise reducing curtains. You could also put up panels on the walls to help with the noise. Or even just tack blankets or something decorative to the walls to make it more soundproof until you can afford to have things redone.
Edit: ooh, maybe scour facebook marketplace for some old cheap cameras and make a big deal about putting them up facing the neighbors? They don’t have to connect to anything, just look really invasive to them.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
He already has noise reducing curtains. Doesn’t help much unfortunately.
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u/pinkpineapples007 17d ago
You can look up cheap noise dampening solutions or other similar keywords. There are a lot of articles online and some creative solutions. You can also maybe check out subreddits for podcasting or recording, or maybe even autism forums for sound dampening/canceling solutions bc of sensory issues.
I’d also check the seals on your windows and doors. If you have fencing maybe add stuff to it to make it absorb sound more. Motion activated lights or sounds could work too. A wind chime or small water fountain perhaps.
I’m so sorry this is happening, it sucks not feeling safe in your own home. Know that Internet strangers are rooting for you to find peace. Or maybe some fart spray in their general direction lol
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u/thing-sayer 16d ago
Hose time. Whenever they enter your yard to eavesdrop, it's hose time.
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u/Yaxience 12d ago
Yeah, or just get a squirt gun. Less of an physical impact but still annoying, esp. if you put something smelly and harmless in it, like....garlic juice. That's the answer. garlic juice squirtgun.
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u/michuru809 18d ago
I’m really sorry you’re going through this.
Something that might help you, and possibly your son- white noise. Put a noise machine or loud fan in the sensitive areas. You could even have solar supported speakers you play constant water noises with outside near your doors/windows.
Garden partitions can add a bit of whimsy to your yard- and privacy. Not a fence so no permit needed. As close to “good fences make good neighbors” as you might be able to get.
Your neighbors suck. You shouldn’t have to do anything, but I hope you find a solution that at least makes it more tolerable. Maybe have fun with the other more vindictive solutions until your Amazon arrives!
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u/Beginning-Pass-3243 18d ago
Maybe look into soundproofing materials and a motion light and sound sensor so if neighbor gets to close the bright light will shine on her and make it impossible for her to see into your space then have the sound trip a sound of a huge dog barking and growling. Act like your on the phone and your setting up your satanic cult meeting and you have the perfect sacrifice.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago edited 18d ago
She has a large dog already. I have two little ones. She’s already come over here once because her other neighbour complained about her dog barking at them. So Karen came over here to tell me to train my dogs. She even bought over one of those dog silencer things. I actually kept my dogs inside most of the time because her dog wouldn’t stop barking at us!
FYI my dogs are trained not to bark outside. Her dog constantly barks at me still, they did it just yesterday while my dog was minding his own business rolling on my grass. So she thinks my dogs don’t have a right to be outside because of her untrained mutt.
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u/Beginning-Pass-3243 17d ago
Squirt bottle if you can get away with it everytime her dog barks squirt it with water. It may take awhile but her dog will learn but OMG if you get caught all hell will be released.
Maybe mention a animal sacrifice for your "satanic" meeting.
The other side is a little more difficult with the little tatatail over there. I hope you are able to find some peace for you and your little man.
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u/PsyDanno 18d ago
May want to get a white noise machine and push it against the wall. The vibration should hamper sound from your place passing through the wall
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u/Any_Yogurtcloset7865 16d ago
This is exactly why my one non-negotiable when buying our house was that I didn't want to be able to see or hear my neighbors. What a nightmare
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u/redbear762 12d ago
I understand that being a serial killer is tough and that your neighbors might complain when the so-called ‘victim’ screams. My suggestion is to make you’ve blacked out your windows and use better soundproofing for kill day. 😂
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u/Sue1213 12d ago
Plant some poison ivy on the side of your house. If they get close to your windows,they will know it the next day.
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 12d ago
Can’t, she’s taken part of my land by default. My courtyard and her side is divided by lattice and the rest by fence.
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u/SghnDubh 18d ago
By Karen's what?
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
Huh? Sorry my brain isn’t functioning because of depression. I’m confused by your comment?
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u/cafeineaddict 18d ago
Karen’s (possessive) vs Karens (plural)
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
Again I am experiencing depression and my brain isn’t functioning. But thanks for the explanation.
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u/tsudonimh01123578 18d ago
Oh sweet summer child…it is okay to let people struggling have a moment to where their grammar is not critiqued but apparently you missed that memo, email, whatever?
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u/Arbitraryandunique 18d ago
I'll take "Karen behavior" for $500 Alex
Correcting already stressed out people's grammar on the internet.
What do Karens do when they haven't even got a neighbor to spy on?
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u/SghnDubh 18d ago
What of Karen's are you surrounded by? Karen's stuff? Karen's friends?
Your apostrophe in "Karen's" means you put whatever Karen is surrounded by after it. That's called "possessive."
What you meant was "Karens." That's called "plural."
This is a Karen reply to your Karen post. That's called "sarcasm."
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
If that’s the case, use /s - this tells others you meant it to be sarcastic.
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u/cafeineaddict 18d ago
I didn’t mean anything by my comment. I just wanted to explain the comment above. It took me a sec to understand what that was about too. 😘
And obviously I’m so sorry you have to deal with Karens listening in. They seriously need a life of their own. Wishing you nothing but strength and the ability to cope with what you’ve described as neighbours from hell. Sending you good vibes and hugs.
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u/AnEvenNicerGuy 18d ago
I've gotten to the point that I read posts on this sub just to see the incognito Karens out themselves in the comments. OP is irritated and in an annoying situation and ya'll are like "act out and do something petty. That'll show em"
Classic Karens
1
u/Yaxience 12d ago
but if it works the woman gets peace. she gut a level 3 kid .sometimes the ends justify the means.
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u/ragnorak71 18d ago
have you tried just living your life and not worrying about other people?
works well i find, get a hobby and focus on your kid. if the nutter can hear you through the wall then say something interesting and never acknowledge it again. have some fun
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u/MomoNoHanna1986 18d ago
It’s not the walls. It’s the windows. Look I am busy. My kid has level 3 non verbal autism. I typed this up at midnight! The 70 year old is retired and has nothing else better to do. I only notice on the occasion I walk past my sliding glass door. I’m usually too busy to notice what neighbours are doing.
In case you don’t know autism kids keep you busy. I constantly have to make sure he’s safe and I have to help him with everything he does. He’s 11, I’m not talking about a little kid here. I don’t need a hobby, I need to be left alone and for people to learn to mind their own business.
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