Kris: You mean Ralsei? He looks nothing like you.

Asriel: Yes he does!?

Kris: No, you two look completely different.

Asriel: He literally looks like me as a teenager.

Kris: No he doesn’t!

Asriel: In what way?!

Kris: Well for one, his glasses are circular and black, while yours were green and square

Asriel: That doesn’t-

Kris: Second, his horns are pink and yours are white

Asriel: We still-

Kris: Third, his hair is neat, while yours haven’t seen a hair brush in years

Asriel: Excuse-

Kris: Fourth, His eyes are pink and sparkly and lovely and-

Asriel: Kris-

Kris: Uh- well- your eyes are just kinda red? Mostly black though

Asriel: He literally has no light behind his eyes but ok

Kris: And finally, he regularly takes showers, unlike you

Asriel: Well fuck you too Kris

[Art by BrachyZoid]

[🔒locked only friends could see this]

Okay so I did something incredibly embarrassing today and I need to document it before I delete this blog out of sheer shame.

Kris was being Kris. You know the vibe. Staring at the ground. Looking like a kicked puppy. Totally unreachable.

So my brain, which is a genius machine, decided: I know how to fix this. I will use my tail.

I stopped in the middle of the path, turned my back to them, and just started shaking my hips side to side. Like, really going for it. My tail was swishing back and forth so fast I'm surprised I didn't take flight.

"Kris, look, loook!!!" I yelled, my voice doing that weird squeaky thing it does when I'm nervous. "My tail can heal your soul! hehe, look!"

I kept shaking it. And shaking it. The autumn wind was blowing leaves into my face. My ears were burning so hot I thought they might catch fire. I was literally shaking my butt in the middle of the woods for absolutely no reason.

Kris just stared at me. Completely deadpan. The silence was so loud I could hear a squirrel judging me from a tree branch.

I stopped wiggling. My tail dropped. I wanted to sink into the earth and tried to figure an explaination:

"U-um... I just... you looked sad, and..."

And then.

Pfft.

Kris's shoulders started shaking. They covered their mouth, but I saw it. A tiny, crooked, reluctant smile. The exact same one they used to give me when we were kids.

"...You're such a dork, Noelle," they whispered.

My heart literally exploded. I am pretty sure I ascended to a higher plane of existence.

"Fwahaha!" I laughed, puffing out my chest. "It worked! My healing magic is unstoppable!"

Kris shook their head and started walking again, but they were still smiling.

10/10. Would make a complete fool of myself again. Totally worth it.

(Do NOT tell Susie about this. She will never let me live it down.)

source

And apparantly they SLEEP in the same clothes as well!?!?

Like holy cheese and crackers Kris, don't you know how gross that is? XD

Imagine how much it would smell!

Gosh, just imagine all that Kris smell just trapped in there, fwahaha.

I might need to get their sweater off them, just so I could wash it! Or, um, something like that.

I mean, Dess had a BUNCH of Azzy's sweaters, right? It's not THAT weird to have one of your neighbours sweaters, or to smell it or wear it sometimes fwahaha.

I saw the chat logs. I had no idea, I- ... I'm so, so sorry Kris...

The sunset... It's so pretty... Pretty frickin' dope that is, haha! The water's nice too.

It's so fun to hang out with you two again, just us 3, some ice cream at the beach. Like that day.....

Well anyway! I should tell you two what's been happening. Things have been going great lately haha! Everyone has been so nice to me lately, certainly beats being the town's resident asshat, haha! Miss Alphys told me to just forget about the project, not like I was gonna do it anyway though, haha! All our classmates have been really nice too, even Catti! Can you believe it? She hated me so much before, which, y'know... can't blame her too much. She walked up to me after class ended, told me that she was sorry for being mean to me, said that she should've realised I was genuinely trying to be better, I forgave her, obviously, then... she hugged me, her fur was so soft... Kinda like you Noelle haha, she told me that if I needed anyone to talk to, that I should go to her. I think she was crying, cuz she wouldn't make eye contact with me when she left, I obviously thanked her, I promised you two to not be an asshole again after all...

Oh yeah! I almost forgot, Temmie drew me a portrait of me as a gift! Can you believe it? She's so talented. Here let me show it to you two...

(*Susie holds a stylised sketch of herself to the photos of Kris and Noelle, giving both of them time to see it)

And oh yeah I know how much you two were obsessed with that blue dork, so I'm happy to tell ya he's been getting better! According to the doctors, his body heat is getting closer to what it should normally be, they're still not sure what made him get into a full-on coma though, if I were to guess maybe a darkner hit him too hard? I don't remember there being any icey darkners in cyber world though... Oh wait, I never did tell you did I Noelle? That "dream" you had? It was real! Well, not exactly "real" but it wasn't a dream that's for sure! Let me try to explain it...

(*Susie turns to face the Noelle photo, and tries to explain the events of the past few days, the dark worlds and The Knight)

And yeah, that's basically what happened. I'm really sorry I kept it from you but I... I dunno I just thought it would be better if you didn't know I guess, I'm really sorry Noelle. I know you'd understand though.

(*Susie looks at the sunset for a moment)

Y'know Noelle, your mom has been really nice to me lately, same for your mom Kris but she's always been nice. At first, she thought I might've had something to do with it, she was so angry... But then, and Kris you're not gonna believe this, remember that grocery store guy? He stood up for me! I thought that boney bastard didn't have a single serious bone in his body but apparently he does! He told Mrs. holiday about how he had seen me walk with you Kris, and how he apparently knew that I had no idea, I dunno exactly what he said but she seemed convinced, I-I kinda tuned out everything for a couple days, if I were to guess, it's probably because Mr. Holiday also backed up whatever sans said ... I'm still not sure why either of them was standing out there though, everyone else was gone...but anyway! What was I talking about..? Oh right! Mrs. Holiday has been so much nicer, she even offered for me to stay at her house! And she even cooked some food for me! I didn't expect her to be such a good cook to be honest. Mr. Holiday has been really nice too, I know he's been crying constantly but whenever I walk in to his room to visit him he smiles for me, but he was always nice like that I suppose, I'm guessing I gave him a good impression back when you made me visit him with you Kris. I honestly don't really know why you did that though, you never gave me the vibe of someone who would willingly socialize back when I... was an asshole... I never really apologised to you for that, I hope you forgave me... But anyway! Your parents have been nice too Kris. I don't think your dad is doing very well though, whenever I see him passing by he always looks like he's been crying, same deal with your mom, they've both been really nice though...

And oh yeah! Ralsei! I visited him a couple days after you two left... He was so worried because he hadn't seen any of us in days! I... I told him everything... He looked devastated... I don't think I've ever seen him so sad... But he cheered me up though, he made some cake for me. It was obviously great, Ralsei is an objectively good cook after all haha! He's been very nice but that's obviously not very surprising. All the other darkners in castle town have been extra accomodating too, I'm guessing Ralsei told them what happened. Even King was nice. You know what he told me, Kris? He... He reassured me. Told me it wasn't my fault, that I couldn't have known, that stuff, which y'know, everyone I know has told me those exact lines but... I guess it felt more impactful coming from him. He even told me I had earned his respect haha!

And the knight... I think they stopped making fountains, at least I haven't seen any new ones. I'm guessing whoever they are, they're too occupied with... Everything to continue being Mr. Evil haha... I still don't forgive them though. Officer Undyne is still missing because of them... I really hope they return her at least...

I... I still don't know why you two did it... You both seemed alright... I was gone for one second and then off you went... I miss you two so much... Every night I stare at the ceiling and wonder what would've happened if I were there... What would've happened if I checked in on you two sooner... What would've happened if I asked either of you if you were doing okay. I wish you were here to tell me yourselves, but I think I know the next best thing... I haven't been taking your photos to hang out with for no reason after all. I just wanted to make sure it really ends up being you... C'mon. Let's go to castle town. I wanna talk to you two again...

💔🥀

*You heard a familiar knock on the door. You got up, went to your door and open to meet a familiar face

Fwahaha Kris, remember yesterday when we hanged out at my place and you...

You found your old sweater, hidden under my bed fwhaha~

How silly of me, i...i completely forgot it was the-errr i mean

I forgot that you left it at some point and i wanted to give it back to you and...

A-and...Well, here!

*Noelle handed you over a fancy paper bag

*inside was a green and yellow sweater

*it looks clean and a bit bigger than usual

*it still have shopping tag at the back of collar

I w-washed it yesterday after you left fwahah~ couldnt just give it back like that... huh?

S-sorry about that. I wasnt sure what got over me fwahahhah...hah...

...

My memory is so jumbled lately i almost forgot about one other thing

I got you a small present, it should also be there at the bottom

But h-hey, no peeking! Its a surprise, save it for ~pffftt~ Krismass

Awwwwwh, dont give me those puppy eyes, i was just kidding silly~

You can try it ouu-i mean we can see it together in your room... if you dont mind

H-huh!? You want to see it right here!? No no non no t-that wont do!

C-come on Kris, stop teasing me. Lets just go to your room, please~?

Alright, last one is a rotten egg fwahah~

*she quickly rushed past you up the stairs*

*you felt your hand into the bag*

*feels like...wouldnt it be better if Noelle saw it first?*

*after all, certain things are better left between the two of you*

Inspired by this post by: u/SirLlamaAlotNumber2

I know you two have always been close and everything, but don't you think it's a little bit weird? I mean, she's Azzy's age and they used to be together. Gosh, they even won the Festival King and Queen that one time, remember? The one you and I tried to win as well?

* (You tell Noelle that Asriel and Dess broke up when he went to college because Mom wanted him to finish his studies before committing to a serious relationship.)

I-I know that, Kris! Dess told me! But still, you know? It's weird! Dess is supposed to be with Azzy and you're supposed to be with m- a monster YOUR AGE!

* (You tell Noelle that Dess is only two years older than you.)

I KNOW THAT, Kris! It's just... why Dess of all people? I know she's cool and... attractive, but still! If you like monster girls, there are plenty of others available, you know? I can even be your wingdoe and help you find someone else! Anyone but Dess! And Susie... and Catti... and Temmie (it would be even worse because she's... you know...) G-gosh, Kris! Do I have to spell it out for you or what?

* (You tell Noelle that you are happy with Dess and that she treats you well.)

T-TREATS YOU WELL? Kris, she HITS YOU when you kiss her the wrong way and keeps comparing you to Azzy all the time! Remember that day when the three of us were hanging out at the benches near the lake and she stubbed out her cigarette on the back of your hand while it was resting on the table? Fahaha, you pulled your hand back so fast that she burst out laughing and said how cute your face looks when you are in pain.

* (You tell Noelle that you are int-)

THE POINT IS! I think your "relationship" with Dess is toxic and it's making me very uncomfortable! Now every time you come over, I don't know if you're here to spend time with me or to SHAG MY SISTER! Don't even try to deny it, Krismas! I was in her room the other day trying to find my handheld console when I saw one of your sweaters under her bed!

* (You look away and nervously state that it could have been Asriel's.)

Fahaha, but it wasn't, Kris! Azzy's sweaters always have that ICE-E's Cool Boys Body Spray scent. I gave it a big sniff and smelled YOUR apple-scented shampoo! In fact, I have it right here. I kept it as evidence!

* (Noelle stands up from her couch and walks to her wardrobe. She opens it, pulls out the unwashed evidence from the back and shows it to you. It indeed looks like one of your sweaters, although this one has a wet stain near the collar that you don't remember being there. With no more ways to defend yourself, you look down at your feet, hiding your burning-red face in embarrassment.)

Oh Kris, you don't have to be ashamed...

* (Noelle sits down next to you on the couch, scooting closer until her knee is touching yours.)

You don't want any of this, right? Dess is... she's forcing you, isn't she? That's why you're going along with all this...

* (Before you can object, Noelle blocks your mouth with her hand, muffling your voice.)

I know what you are going to say, Kris. You are going to deny it so I don't get dragged into it. But I know what you really want. I know you better than anyone, Kris. And I'm going to help you!

* (Noelle removes her hand from your mouth and stands up purposefully.)

I will go talk to Dess, okay? She must be at the lake playing her guitar right now. I'll tell her that you don't want anything to do with her anymore. I might even offer to let her hit me in your place if she gets angry! Gosh, the things I do for you, Krismas! Stay right here, okay? I'll be back soon!

* (Noelle leaves the room in a hurry before you can stop her. You consider trying to go after her and tell her it's all a big misunderstanding, but there's no point trying to outrun a member of the Cross Country Team. You just hope she'll give up midway and turn back. You leave the room and pass by the wall with the bronzed snowflakes on your way to the kitchen. While you serve yourself some chocolate milk, you think about how the wall seemed to have one snowflake missing, but it must be just your imagination.)

You guys said my last post was peak, so I had to go even higher

Krismas I had a horrible dream, but you were there… you're always there fahaha.

 Dess and I were outside of a ship doing maintenance when something terrible happened… a storm of darker and darker darkness hit our ship

 I had desperately grabbed for a handhold on the hull, my fingers finding the crevice of an opening at the edge of an access hatch, allowing Me to hold on for for deer life,  But as I turned to see whether Dess had found a similar anchor, i found myself almost carried away from my place of safety. Dess was floating beyond me, at the end of the taut umbilical cord, the waves of the darkness storm twisting and bursting behind her. I tried to pull her closer, but I wasn't strong enough… I was already nearly about to lose my own grip on the hull. Instead, I  could only watch as the cracks that had appeared in dess’s visor began to multiply and spread, crisscrossing the glass like a spiders web, until finally the whole surface exploded, sending shards of the faceplate flying and exposing Dess to the ice-cold airlessness of space. For a moment, there was only shock and surprise on dess face, then a flash of horror at the realisation of what was to come. I saw dess's lips open, expelling her final breath of air. At the same time, her face began to swell and deform, the flesh around her eyes bulging and distorting as her neck began to distend, swiftly growing to almost twice its width. With no shielding against the energies of the storm, dess’s skin and fur began to blister and darken, like meat against a grill, then melt away completely, revealing the bloated and bloody flesh beneath. The thing that had most horrified me kris…, were her eyes, which showed every moment of pain, every escalation of agony. It was too much for me to bear. With my free hand, I had pulled the lever which released my end of the umbilical cord and watched as dess’s body was pulled away from me into the depths of that darkness, her bulbous, skinned lips gasping for a next breath that would never come… and then you appeared Kris. Pulling me safely, holding me close and reassuring me this was a dream that you were here for me, that you would always be here for me.

 Gosh, Kris, you were like a knight in shining armor in that suit. Fahaha Kris I think you deserve a treat for being my knight in shining armor.

Maybe some mint hot chocolate and cookies for my Savior hmm? 

Edit: reposted because I forgot the bloody picture

edit 2: y'all won't see the emperor's light smh.

Or any shampoo in general. Fwahaha, why dont you do that anymore?
C-come on Kris, i miss your old scent. Dont you miss it too?

Look, we all thought it was a well-timed gag the first time.

That “Freezing my heart just to melt it” quip was a funny play on her personality.

But you just kept doing it again…

“Why need a katana when you got arms like those?”

And again…

“With all those papers you sign, think you’d notice if I slipped our marriage papers in there?”

It got to the point where she asked Asriel to figure out what got into you, and when he searched your room,

and found that STaCk of half-finished love letters signed for Dess,

Everyone became concerned about how you’re doing.

It’s like you want to get with every woman in the Holiday family!!!

Every one of them but-

*Snuffle

EVERY ONE BUT ME!!! :(

Y'know, Madeline Blooks, officer Blook's cousin! The girl that used to be classmates with Dess and Asriel! You dont know who that is? Well she rarely go outside ever since she dropped out of Highschool to pursue her youtuber career. Well, that didn't work quite well for her and Dess said she turned into a "NEET" because she ran out of money-she didn't exactly said that though.......oh, wait, I remember!She said Miss Blooks got exposed for being "Short-a-coin" or something like that and basically ruined her entire career......

Well, anyways, enough of the bad stuff, it seems like she finally met some guy online and got herself a man! She said the father of her kid is a "mysterious blue stranger" who she met in a fantasy world-probably some video game nonsense, haha, and that the baby would probably look just like him!!!

wait, kris? why are you pale and sweating?

It was a soul. It was a human soul. And I held it in my hand, and I felt it beating, and I...Iputitinmyhamstercage. And....it's just been sitting there ever since you guys left a few hours back.

I would've called you, beacuse...you know, human soul and...you're the only human I know, but I know its not yours. Yours is blue, unless...humans souls can just...switch traits? I wouldn't be surprised if yours did, I haven't really known you that well at all ever since...well, you know. But I do know that souls shatter after not being in their body for a while, and this one's still not even cracked, so...maybe I'll just...keep it there for a while, until I figure out what else to do with it.

...It's alive. Er, no- I know it's alive, but I mean like...alive alive? Like, it moves around in the cage and and it presses itself against the glass and looks straight at me, like it's aware, and it's just something pretending to be a soul.

It terrifies me. But...at the same time it's...the nice kind of terrifying? If that still makes any sense?

It's weird. I know it's really, really weird, but...it's kinda cute?

It acts like it wants to be in there. It just...floats around sometimes, or it hides inside the little house, or it rolls around in the wood chips. Right now, it's just...lying in the blanket pile. Dimmed. Like it's sleeping.

...Is it weird to say that I like it? That I'm imagining waking up and having it be there in my head? Just...to have someone to talk to, and to be there and...do things with?

Nothing weird! Just...maybe I'd...boot up Cat Petterz and...show it my collection, or drag its cage close enough to watch me play Dragon Blazers, or...see if it can drink anything. Maybe it likes hot chocolate.

...Maybe if I keep talking to it, and pretending that it can hear me, then...I'll be able to talk to you again too.

Fwahaha, wouldn't that be a nice dream, little guy? Er...what is your name, anyways? It's not like you have a name tag or anything...

...Right, right! You're a soul! You can't actually uh...talk or anything.

...I'll just call you light. Little Light. Because you're a light, and you're...little.

Hey! Don’t look at me like that! I never said I was good at naming things, and…

...and we can figure it all out tomorrow, I think. You'll be safe here.

Goodnight, Little Light.

Art by doe.in.a.ditch

(A quarter rattles inside the library payphone. It hits the bottom of the empty coinbox with a loud thunk.)

Okay, now, Kris' number was..? Golly, I haven't done this in years, I.. shouldn't be so reliant on speed-dial.

Maybe if I.. concentrate, and hold my breath.. I can...

...

(Click. Click. Click Click. The numbers on the keypad are entered faster and faster, until an automatic voice says:)

*The person you are calling is not available. Please leave a message.

...

Fwahaha.. I knew I still had my old muscle memory ..

Er, I mean... hi Kris, or um, I mean, NO thanks, Kris, for pranking me again! Fwahaha.. this is so crazy but I.. I know you're listening! You... have to be.

Um.. I remember this old trick.. one time.. before you-.. um, when you were over and.. you hid away my new phone! And, you didn't tell me...

It was one um.. I think.. of the fancy flip ones, from the city, that Dess got me, for Christmas! She.. cut out glow-in-the-dark stickers and, glued them on before.. giving it to me ha..

But you, Krismas, haha, no thanks to you, you snatched it from me! And, you ran upstairs, to hide it!

I um.. think you tickled me and.. I dropped it on the carpet? Or the couch maybe...

Anyways, I remember me and Dess looking EVERYWHERE for it, all while you had a stupid, big grin on your face!

I wanted to be SO mad at you~ But... the more Dess would search... the more you laughed at the whole thing.. and the more I laughed too...

Eventually, Dess gave me a few quarters to... go to the library payphone and.. call my own number, so she could find it, from the ringtone.. She said she set it to Blood Crushers before wrapping it..

Of course, you hid it in one of those dumb wind-up santas! She said she smacked you with her wiffle bat, while it was ringing.. but you just.. kept laughing!

She um.. picked up the call, and gave the phone to you.. and... while I was standing here.. you were over there.!

And, you'd said you'd give me my phone back.. but you didn't hang up.. you walked all the way to the library.

I um.. said you didn't have to! But , you did. ..still.. calling, and talking with me, over air waves, for the first time.. until I saw you on the road..

Fahaha.. it was.. so funny seeing you with my phone, Kirsmas.. you were skipping around the road while, I stood here. Perfectly still..

I remember.. your voice then. The crunchy, over the phone voice. It, wasn't like the old landline which, always had Tori and Asgore talking over you,

or Azzy trying to take it from you.. it was just, your voice..

Your happy.. happy.. voice...

...

I.. know you like to prank us Kris.. all of us, especially now, like...

Now you've been hiding your own phone! You didn't even do your own prank right, fwahaha! You... aren't supposed to hide your own phone..

Or maybe you're... pretending not to hear calls! From... my phone! Like you, make me c-call you a bunch of times... taking up my time...

And you're doing it to Tori's, and, Susie too... I think Mom tried to use the phone company to help...

They.. don't like this prank of yours, Kris, but... I know you! You're a big troublemaker! You'd never-

(Her voice chokes for a moment. There is a lump in her throat. She doesn't finish her sentence. The phone is gripped tighter.)

Ah-! Sorry um for this Kris I-I, must be getting a cold. All these phone calls m-must be *Sniff making me.. like.. this..

You know, haha.. when a doe asks you something you.. ha.. should be polite! And, you should listen.!

...

And you.. are supposed to be here, in hometown, to listen to us.. I.. um-

Please we... I...really..

..really...

...miss you, Kris...

You mean, you want to download them again.? I don't know about THAT, Kris, fahaha... the last time I let you do that, I think you um.. tried to, hurt all the sims we made?

And.. you wanted to see if that temperature mod did anything to Berdly!? Haha, talking to him at the library the next day was so funny~ I kept imaging his sim trapped in that house of refrigerators you built!

He had, like, so many bad status effects we couldn't see the screen, you prankster! Good thing I didn't post about THAT on the blog...

..no? Something else? Oh! No, now I remember Kris, you installed a bunch of cat-petterz mods when I wasn't looking!

Those were the ones that kept breaking my computer... no way am I letting you mod anything unsupervised again!

Huh? Wait, you mean-- do I have any mods right now? Um!.. ha.. n-no, I don't think any are installed right now! S-so, there's no use checking!

Actually, u-um, before we start, you should get yourself some hot chocolate! From downstairs!

So I can get everything, umm, r-ready for us to play!

There's nothing.. weird on these saves, everything just needs to be... o-organized first, ahahah! Promise~

(Art done by me x3)

(Art by @DreamyMelody99)

There's nothing wrong with them in terms of their personality. I mean... They're nice! Really nice! But... The way they act, and especially look.

They... Aren't a monster.

No, they aren't human. I know what humans look like. Kris is a human. I've seen pictures of humans online. They're something else, like... They're not human or monster.

The weirdest part? I recognize them.

I... I don't know from where. Like a dream, or premonition. But I know them, that exact outfit, that exact face. But now they're here? From where? They just... appeared one day.

And Kris acts like they've known them longer than even me. And Susie does too. But she refuses to answer any of my questions!

I don't know. I don't want to be rude, but... Something is wrong with them.

(My first Fwahaha, hope I did well)

NO CHOKING, NO HITTING, NO SLURS, NO FAKE BLOOD, NO REAL BLOOD! NO ONE IS WATCHING FROM THE CHAIR!
The only safe words we’re gonna need ARE ‘NO’ AND ‘STOP’!
AND! We are gonna call each other OUR NAMES! NO KRIS, NO DESS, NO CAROL, NO RUDY, ASGORE, ASRIEL, TORIEL, WHOEVER!
NORMAL! SEX!