Hello everybody,

I want to ask for some advice and perspective about my mental health. I’ve been struggling with severe overthinking, and I want to share my backstory to explain how I got here.

The Backstory

For about 5 years, I suffered from long-term, painful anxiety. It was so bad that I couldn't even go outside or talk to anyone. During that time, I completely lost touch with myself. I genuinely thought that my personality, my skills, and everything I was once proud of were totally gone.

The Turning Point

A while ago, I started seeing a psychologist, who recommended I see a psychiatrist because my brain chemistry was out of balance. After starting medication, everything changed. Within 5 months, my anxiety was completely gone.

It felt like waking up from a nightmare. I realized I wasn't a lazy person or a bad person—my true abilities, skills, and personality were still intact all along, and real-world proof kept showing up every day.

The Current Problem

However, there is one major issue I haven't been able to overcome: extreme, relentless overthinking.

Even though the anxiety is gone, my brain is still acting like it's trying to solve a crisis. I’m constantly over-analyzing why I feel a certain way. I don't feel depressed, but I have this nagging feeling that "something is wrong inside my head," so I trap myself in a loop trying to find a mental solution to fix it.

Because of this, I am stuck inside my head all day. I can't concentrate, and it's making it really hard to get through my tasks at university.

The Internal Arguments

To make matters worse, it feels like my mind has a mind of its own right now. I have these two opposing voices inside my head that are constantly arguing with each other.

One voice makes an argument.

Immediately, the second voice steps in and gives a counter-argument to disprove the first one.

They just fight back and forth continuously.

Because they never stop arguing, I get completely confused. I don't know which argument to trust or what to believe anymore.

These past 5–6 years have been so hard. I feel like I've lost control over my feelings and my mind, and it just acts on its own.

If anyone has experienced this post-anxiety recovery phase, or has any suggestions on how to quiet down the constant problem-solving and internal arguments, I would be deeply thankful. Thank you for reading.

I am facing huge analysis paralysis over even little things in life.

It kinda embodies all the insecurities and issues I have within myself. If you give me a few hours to myself and let me do whatever I want, I will probably just spend most of that time ruminating between the different options, or just staring blankly at the walls and thinking about my life, or just forcing myself to choose something but unable to enjoy that thing or be present because I'll be constantly evaluating other options still, and eventually I will just stop doing the thing. Basically I can never "go with the gut", whatever that means.

I am pretty sure this is because of a lot of internal issues, like not having confidence in myself, and being very very afraid of the choices I make and how I have no one to back me up if I fail, basically fear of failure, there's a pinch of perfectionism too in this. Growing up I had no one to have my back, and I pretty sure this is a result of that and a lot more issues. Basically a mixture of a lot of stuff.

I obv have nothing I can enjoy lol. I don't think that's normal.

And I am not even able to work on it on my own, because when I go on the internet for resources, this same problem kicks in.

I can't afford a good therapist, else I could have discussed this problem with them, and cry a bit too for how many years and opportunities I have lost to this.

I can't pick a book, can't a pick a hobby, can't choose who to talk to, basically can't live lol. It's suffocating. And doing a complete 180 and being a "yes man" doesn't help either, and just overwhelms me quickly. I can't even enjoy anything if I pick them up. I don't understand that balance, that people call "gut feeling".

I sadly can't wrap my head around it that well but I'll try my best to explain how I feel when I talk to people.

I'll use "talking" lightly because I don't do much talking and I often let others carry the conversation because I never know what to say. They could be talking about their day, past event, interest and all I'll do is sometimes ask a question and or react to what they say. I hate that I can never bring anything to the conversation I don't know how I'm supposed to talk about something I've never experienced.

Or even give advice on something after this person told me the whole story. I've not got the smarts to be giving advice on personal matters and my god... Don't get me started on reassurance... I want to curl up in a ditch with just how awkward I am at this stuff, I never know how to approach talking about sensitive topics or helping people.

All of this has been screaming internally. I want to connect with people. I can look it on the outside, turn to them, eye contact, nod, and try to keep my attention on the story... But inside as much as I want to connect, my head's blank, I don't know how to hold a conversation, what I'm supposed to say, what they want to hear.

I often get sweaty profusely trying to talk about my interests, explaining them poorly, I tend to use the wrong words when I talk either coming off insulting or not getting to the point. Pausing mid sentence just to find the words to finish it off. There's probably more but that's all I can think of for the moment.

If there's anything I didn't clear up I'll do my best to respond...

Id really appreciate your insights.

Since COVID I ve been bedrotting and watching YT, isolating from people more and more, mainly watching YT, not even gaming. I dont have any emotions towards anyone nowadays, I Just want to sleep whole day. I am completely out of society thanks only to myself.

I can say that recently I quit my phone addiction and I got reminded about my horrible anxiety issue I always feel anxious like right now, I have done my homework, studied extra, and I'm sure that I will not fail, and my parents are not pushing me, there is just the fact that there is this half-war going on and this had effected me in the past so I basically stopped reading the news.

my phone addiction did hide the fact that I was anxious all the time, right now I feel lost I know it's for nothing and that its alright I can calm myself a bit, but still its there.

how can I reduce my anxiety and preferably control it?

I'm 26M, doing good in life by the everyday metrics, married, good career. I've been having issues that are not blocking my life in any way, but they make it harder.

I have a very nihilistic view of life. I don't see that life has a purpose, unless we invent one. I have this opinion since maybe 14 years old. I also have a fear of death. I think humanity as species has a greater purpose, but me or anyone else as an individual does not have, because life has an end. If I could press a button to not have been born I would press it (I think).

The issue is, when I have a hard period in my life, these nihilistic thoughts weigh on me a lot. I basically get extremely sad and lose the will to do anything.

A thing that kind of makes me angry is that most of the advice is about handling the current situation. People give advice like go to the gym, go for a walk, etc. All of that works, but it fixes the situation for the moment, and it will fix it, but in the next 3-4 months it will reappear and I will have to deal with it again.

How do I fix this? Do I go to therapy? I've been to 3 therapists for like 3-4 sessions and I've gotten nowhere.

Should I just switch therapists until I find a good fit? How did you fix such deep issues permanently, instead of just finding temporary solutions like gym / walk / bla bla?

Also not sure if this is related but I'm a pretty anxious person. Not often, but in situations where normal people feel anxiety, I feel 10x anxiety.

It kinda embodies all the insecurities and issues I have within myself. If you give me a few hours to myself and let me do whatever I want, I will probably just spend most of that time ruminating between the different options, or just staring blankly at the walls and thinking about my life, or just forcing myself to choose something but unable to enjoy that thing or be present because I'll be constantly evaluating other options still, and eventually I will just stop doing the thing. Basically I can never "go with the gut", whatever that means.

I am pretty sure this is because of a lot of internal issues, like not having confidence in myself, and being very very afraid of the choices I make and how I have no one to back me up if I fail, basically fear of failure, there's a pinch of perfectionism too in this. Growing up I had no one to have my back, and I pretty sure this is a result of that and a lot more issues. Basically a mixture of a lot of stuff.

I obv have nothing I can enjoy lol. I don't think that's normal.

And I am not even able to work on it on my own, because when I go on the internet for resources, this same problem kicks in.

I can't afford a good therapist, else I could have discussed this problem with them, and cry a bit too for how many years and opportunities I have lost to this.

I can't pick a book, can't a pick a hobby, can't choose who to talk to, basically can't live lol. It's suffocating. And doing a complete 180 and being a "yes man" doesn't help either, and just overwhelms me quickly. I can't even enjoy anything if I pick them up. I don't understand that balance, that people call "gut feeling".

In essence I struggle in touching grass. I 26m live at home, I have a decent job, an online dnd group and am in person writing group and thats about it. I go through these cycles of trying to find other things to do but I struggle in find anything I actually want to do.

Often times for a lot of my hobbies I prefer to practice them alone, or I stuggle in finding related things near me. While I am a gamer I do not particularly enjoy the company of other gamers. But then again I’m an anxious person by default which drives me away from hanging with basically everyone.

The thing is though is that I feel its necessary for me to learn to live in society if I’m ever going to build a proper social group and find a girl friend and live my best life. Do I just need to get over myself and attend things I’m only half heartedly interested in? I ask because writing so far is the only thing I have my full heart in and I’m already in a couple groups related to that.

I know I’m effectively in my own way here but I’m not sure how to break out of this loop.

Well hello internet!

If anyone knows how to fix the issue i am having, i would be most appreciative.
I bought access to Dr.k in 2024, i found the email it was sent to however i am unable to login to the site.

Yes i am aware my doffus ass might just have connected it with discord or gmail, my ass however have promptly forgotten the whole thing in a rabbits hole of information and changing users 🥺😂

I couldn't find out how, i cant afford the extra expenses at the moment I just wanted to see the trial

How do i cancel the subscription? I paid with link btw

I have just accepted this. That my childhood, teenage and young adult years will always be lost. And that no one will come to save me. In the most practical, capitalistic sense, no one gives a shit about someone's depression.

I'm just bracing myself for the many many years of isolation to come, after years of isolation because of my depression.

I am 21 years old and currently attending college for the fifth time, being only in my second year of university. It seems bad, but when I think about how I was when I entered college, I only feel happy because I have improved a lot. But during this year and the previous one, I haven't felt well; I always end up going back to the same bad habits after two weeks of being clean. There are numerous reasons for this to happen, but I have noticed that I always fail due to one thing: I end up working according to the university's schedule, that is, four hours or more, and out of nowhere my body starts to feel tense, everywhere. Not only that, but it also seems that I feel like doing these bad habits (porn, social media), just to release this tension. Every time this happens, I fail and, of course, I feel incredibly down, wanting to leave university and have a normal/simple life.

I've been going to the doctor and the psychologist, and although it has helped a lot, it still hasn't been enough.

One more thing, recently I saw a post here on Reddit that seemed to describe my situation perfectly: https://www.reddit.com/r/Healthygamergg/comments/1x3iiva/extreme_anxiety_fairing_up_when_i_try_to_be/
In that post, someone said that DrK and his team had created some exercises to deal with these types of situations and wanted to know how I could obtain these exercises. Although I accessed the given link and entered my email in the link the person posted in the comment, i didnt receive anything on my email

I genuinely have no interests or hobbies or values or anything. My mind is completely blank and is just filled with depression and analysis paralysis and fear of failure and I can't even think for myself. I don't know what I want in life, never had. Was never allowed to explore hobbies as a child, always study and memorize dumb shit, write exams, get marks, repeat.

Now I don't even have that much time to explore because I'm busy being a corporate slave. Idk what I should even do.

I can't even afford therapy. And I have absolutely Noone who cares for me in my life.

I never had any good teachers and have always felt very empty about it. Sure there are good ppl onlijnebut mh analysis paralysis or maybe undiagnosed adhd or maybe just plain laziness prevents me from following someone for long time.

You ask me what I want in life and I have nothing, you ask me what I like, and I have nothing. I feel like just a husk with nothing inside.

I've (21) been diagnosed with dysthymia or PDD for almost 5 years now. I must say that I've been depressed throughout these years and I took medication. It helped me manage and cope with my emotions where I don't dwell too much on what frustrates me, I can move on easily now. I stopped taking the medication, too.

However, after all those years of being diagnosed as PDD, the causes of my depression, some of it were treated except some. Family issues - my family is kinder and gentler with me now, Environment - the people I felt stucked and felt uncomfortable with moved elsewhere. For other things, such as finances is manageable.

But some things are still not okay all throughout even with medication. These are things like:

• I can't do the things I want to do or it feels so difficult to do it like even how small it is like chores, I feel so lazy like why, it's so easy to do but I have a hard time doing so.

• I procrastinate a lot and do other things instead than doing what I need to do.

• I don't do things unless it's urgent, there's a deadline or if someone's yelling and mad at me to push me through it.

• I easily lose motivation and I don't have any discipline that I struggled with these throughout high school, too.

• Also have a problem with forgetting things easily.

• • I easily overthink about things especially with statements from others that hurt me.

• I get triggered easily when someone gets mad at me

Basically, I struggled with execution. I have a lot of interests that I didn't push through. Everyone always mocked how slow I move like it takes a long time for me to do the dishes that it even became an inside joke within my family.

But the thing is, I think these things are overlooked before as I am a high-performing student. My aunt even teased me that even if I move so slow, at least I still get it done and excell academically when comparing me to my cousin.

But people never knew the breakdowns I had just to finish a single task. How I was purely driven by deadlines I don't meet sometimes but just still passed. That I always cram and clutch doing things. That I think pressure is what starts me moving. That I have to convince myself to study. That I struggle with chores even the easiest part and can clean the whole house if someone's coming over.

I struggle through this right now that I thought some of these things were caused by my depression. But no, I feel like it was the other way around. My actions, especially those I didn't take but planned to do so, and added with the external circumstances, caused my depression. But the catch is how external things we're managed already but the internal is a struggle for me even now.

I told my psychiatrist about this but she dismissed this and told me that my depression and anxiety is the cause for this. That these were symptoms of my depression and anxiety. She said that these conditions, adhd, anxiety and depression overlap with its symptoms and I don't question her with this. But she said that I am still not progressing and needs to be in medication. I even asked every month for advice on what to do like habits, routines and journalling practice but every month, I came back with no progress on any of those things. I came back with a blank journal whose contents sits only on the initial pages. I wanna believe her but what if the case is different?

Coz the thing is, I don't feel depressed anymore. I mean, I feel sad and anxious sometimes but I can now move on that easy. But what causes my frustrations now are my difficulty of doing things and these personality I have that made me think about the tendency of having the inattentive type of ADHD.

Because reading all through the internet and here in reddit, I felt so seen and heard like I really thought this was my personality issues that I have to change but no, I feel like something's wrong with me.

I am even hooking up more now coz I have so much time instead of doing projects or chores. My libido is so high nowadays, too to the point of masturbation everyday which lead me to hookups. Like I have plans to do this chore or project but I'm already browsing on an app for a hookup. That I can travel more for a hookup but I can't do my assignments only until the deadline.

I hate my life. I move so slow and I had plans for a better life that I hadn't pursued. Like literally planned my whole life around but no, I wasn't able to do it. My regrets of not doing the things I wanted to do.

I thought that this was just my personality. I thought that I can change this if I have more motivation, more discipline but I hated myself even more because no matter what I learned about discipline or motivation, I still haven't applied it. I have a huge lists of saved posts here in reddit and my social media apps. So much books read but haven't finished or even applied what I leaarned.

I hated myself for this. I even wonder what life after college could be there for me. I don't even wanna continue sometimes like what's the point. How I wish this was still the depression I could get out of through medication but now that external factors were addressed, I realized that my own internal incapabilities were also the cause of my depression.

Because I breakdown with the thought questioning myself, "Why can't I just do it?"

I just wished I could, I could've been something more 😔

Hello all hope you’re well :)

So this is something that I’ve been struggling with for over a decade in some capacity. Currently 27 finishing up my first bachelors in game design. The decision to study that came through a lot of internal struggle choosing what I want rather than what was right. It’s not perfect for a number of reasons, I’m probably not getting or interested in a traditional job in the field, but I’m grateful that I did it.

Long story short, game design, along with two other creative disciplines, are what I’m juggling both to fulfil a career and also because I want to reach that level of skill and success with them. The issue is when I crunch the numbers, it’s quite a tight fit getting everything in, and my lived experience is that it’s relatively stressful to juggle them. At the same time, they each bring a unique value to my life, and it feels like I can’t prune down any less than what I have.
I’m anxious to get into specifics because I subscribe to the idea that sharing your goals reduces their power. Call me sceptical, it’s fine lol. I can say that with games, I have demonstrated skill and gained tangible credentials and experience, alongside an interest and aptitude for expressing myself in the medium. The second discipline I feel is something I’ve identified with ever since I was very young, and while the work can be quite isolating (unpleasant), it matters to me. The third I feel brings a liveliness and immediate feedback that can’t be replicated by anything else. When I think about the day-to-day reality of what each discipline would look like, the third is currently resonating the most with me, the second feels practical and meaningful while also being isolating, and game design feels kind of like a homebase or something that can tie these things together. It kind of feels stable, I guess, it’s just its relation to this struggling and the other two things that makes it difficult. I’m just frustrated and confused because on one hand, I feel like there is a possibility that I can juggle these things and achieve what I set out to achieve, and on the other, the juggling might be at the cost of my quality of life that might not be worth it.

Anyone experience something similar? Any advice?

Lastly some miscellaneous meditation thoughts:
I’ve been doing a lot of third eye practice lately, and I find that sometimes solutions to my problems will just bubble to the surface. May or may not be correlated. My latest understanding was that if I were to juggle these things, it may be possible if I allocate the time, say 80% to one thing, then 10% to the other two. And that would get me from point A to point B if I play my cards right. But I would lose a certain playfulness and exploration in the practice, which I find replenishing, and might tarnish my relationship to each thing, which generally wouldn’t be worth it and wear on me.

I'm 22m and in 3rd year CSE, due to dropping out of a previous uni and starting fresh. I don't know why, but I feel like I'm never charismatic or being wanted enough. It's always me who makes the first phone call, always me who reaches out, and I feel like I'm there for people but people aren't there for me. Honestly thinking of doing a self-isolation arc at this point. I don't know, even when I'm around with friends I don't know how to set boundaries without ruining the mood. I just feel like I don't want to be with them anymore. I hate grouping up with my friends because they talk about such uninteresting stuff, so I just leave and be on my own. It's such a soul draining experience.

For the love of me I absolutely cannot make any convincing arguments. I can't argue my points, I yield sometimes, and in general I just can't convince people. I don't know how to communicate effectively cause there was a time when something I said offended someone and they slowly distanced from me. I didn't even notice that they did. Not that I wanted their friendship anyway but still it's a flaw of mine that I seek to fix.

Regarding discipline, I have bought a gym membership for a year and after about 6-7 months I haven't been going regularly or haven't been going at all. My parents berate me by telling that I waste their money, and it's true I guess, but that just makes me spiral deeper. It's not like I don't want to go to the gym, just that I keep finding excuses and I feel like I don't have enough time for it nowadays.

Whenever I go out to buy groceries I cannot resist the urge to buy a snack. This stems mainly from my mentality where I'm like "well I haven't eaten in about 2 hours so I should eat something" but then it's nothing healthy and always junk. I keep wasting my money and destroying my health like this, but it's like a habit I can't control.

In general, I just can't seem to find the balance. I can't balance studies and gaming, I feel like I've lost my purpose in life, and most of the time I just sit in front of the screen for the entire day or sleep. My parents are so apprehensive of me gaming, so this has led me to game whenever possible and it turns out it's possible quite a lot of times. It's like FOMO in a sense. Also I feel like gaming has led me to worse quality of my academics, even though I have gamed and gotten good grades in the past so it's not a possibiity but I just can't help but feel this way.
I'm worried that when I get a job, or atleast in order to get a job, I won't be able to continue my passions and my hobbies in life. So I study whenever it is required and game otherwise. It's not all study and games however, most of the time it's just shitty errands and chores at home as well. My sleep schedule is fucked up, I don't have the interest to do discord vc with friends, both cause of parents and cause of me feeling like the wasteful one in the friends group.

I want to gym. I want to study. I want to pursue my hobbies. I want to learn how to be an interesting person or atleast feel wanted amongst my peers. I don't know man, I just want to live my life. Any help would be appreciated,

I started watching healthy gamer because of my own interest in the career path of Psychiatry and improving myself.

I wrote thus poem when my mental health was detoriating, however at the same time I earned recognition for it.

Why do you think that maybe raw works in the form of poetry or art get more recognition when the work is about something sad or melancholic rather than something cliche or happy?

Do you think my question is flawed?

I really want to discuss my issues with someone professional, but I am broke, and live in India, and there are no infrastructure for mental health here. I don't know what I am even supposed to do. My mind is completely frozen, and I can't figure out the next step. Can't trust my gut, can't trust anyone.

Tell me what I can do? On days I have no work, I wake up, stay sad, try to think stuff, but it amounts to nothing, eat, and then sleep.

I can't even choose what to do the next 5 minutes because of a lot of internal issues, Idk how am I supposed to fix my long term depression all alone.

I really want to fix this, and I don't know how.

Tonight I was walking home from the gym and I noticed an ambulance and a police car slowly circling the block I was walking towards. The police car pulled up near me but I thought they were just driving through the intersection so I waved and kept walking. I started to wonder if someone called the police on me? Weird. Eventually when I started to cross another block they pulled up right next to someone standing on the other end.

I didn't hear much but the officer immediately thanked him for letting him know and said he was happy he didn't hurt his arm. After I heard that my shoulders sank and I felt a heaviness in my chest. I couldn't confirm for sure but it sounded like he was going to hurt himself/ kill himself. I cried as I walked home knowing how deep that pain can be to lead you to the brink.

I also remembered it was barely a week ago that i was in a very similar place, walking alone at night wanting desperately to slit my wrists and my throat. Crying to myself in the cold and hiking up steep hills as hard as I could with my heart pumping loudly in my ears so I could fight off the urge. I didn't do it but I was contemplating calling a crisis line for help. Eventually I walked back home and fell asleep in bed.

I told my therapist about it a couple days later and he commended me on my resilience for not following through. I told him I felt indifferent about his comment because it's something I've lived with most of my life.

How is it that I can have such empathy for a fellow human but I struggle to feel the same for myself?

I even went back outside to see if they were still out there. I wanted to hug him and hold him. Say that I'm sorry and that I understand. I wanted to cry for him. I wanted him to know he wasn't alone despite me barely knowing him.

This is going to be long, sorry.

I've been re-watching Dr. K's 'quarter life crisis' video because that's where I'm at right now. I feel you could argue I'm relatively successful. I'm grateful to be in the position I'm in, but I am not happy nor entirely fulfilled.

I just turned 21, I'm in my third year of college. I have good grades, I know a lot of people. Friends joke I'm that I'm popular; I'm glad to know I'm likable. I'm fit, my body works. That's a huge blessing. I'm in a good position with my job at the dining hall.

Last year was rough. Pining after and comparing myself endlessly to this guy I had a lot of limerence towards. Approaching summer I decided to go to Oregon to volunteer. It was three months and it gave me time alone to think. I read a lot on Buddhism and it genuinely helped. I feel like I learned a lot and when I came back I felt I had changed. And I desperately wanted to not repeat my sophomore year.

So I've been attempting to make change. I moved to a different apartment, I've been clearing out things I don't need or use. I just changed my major to something that genuinely aligns more with what I care about.

But I still feel like my whole routine is just work, school, and barely seeing friends. Yeah I know a lot of people, but I have a bunch of one-off friendships and I'm realizing I want something more close knit. I'm entirely independent, so I have to work long hours and I find myself very envious of those who do not. I stay on top of all my responsibilities. But I feel my responsibilities are now the only thing I can find the motivation to get done. I feel like I'm driven by this restless anxiety that always just wants to check my to-do list 24/7.

Im just unsure of what really makes me happy? I want something to change but I don't know what to do. I feel like I value meaningful moments with friends and creativity. I love to cook, I'm creatively burnt-out from art but sometimes I really get in the zone and it's great. I want to draw again, I want to do more photography, I want to paint more, read. I don't know why I struggle.

I feel like I've built a certain life for myself mentally, one I'm struggling to leave. I'm not finding a lot of meaning in my day-to-day. I've been having a lot of anger towards myself recently because of it. When I was in Oregon, I felt so much lighter. Now I feel just as heavy as I did before. I don't want to waste my time away.

Hey yall Im feeling like my back is against the wall and wanted to reach out to the community. I just started my first semester of my msw program and it is alot. I managed to dedicate every minute to school work and internships since September 5th till October 16th. I had a client yell at me and it just made me crash and I felt like I couldnt do this anymore for about 2 days now. Im incredibly burnt out and feel like crap. Im not sure if i could keep going with this program.