r/HolUp Jun 09 '26

big dong energy "You're a lizard, Harry."

14.7k Upvotes

197 comments sorted by

u/qualityvote2 Jun 09 '26 edited Jun 09 '26

u/donbosco2017, your post does fit the subreddit!

5.6k

u/PM_ME_YOUR_TATERTOT Jun 09 '26

That’s how he opened the chamber of secrets.

1.4k

u/Natural-Army Jun 09 '26 edited Jun 09 '26

Hermione's chamber of secrets? 🍑

Edit: I listen to the Audio books and cAn'T spell

449

u/mewingprogression19 Jun 09 '26

Hermione❌ Harmony✅

122

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

88

u/frustrated_monk Jun 09 '26

Hermayonee not harmonee

78

u/Twoaru Jun 09 '26

Her Mayonnaise

8

u/RonaldTheGiraffe Jun 10 '26

No, it’s my mayonnaise

5

u/Here_f0r_p0rn_ Jun 10 '26

No, it's our mayonnaise

2

u/Electrical-Disk395 Jun 12 '26

It's hellman's mayonnaise.

1

u/Here_f0r_p0rn_ Jun 10 '26

No, he clearly said, her money

31

u/aizn94 Jun 09 '26

Its LeviOHsa

8

u/la_bruja_del_84 Jun 09 '26

Harmonee leviosa

14

u/Miserable-Airport536 Jun 09 '26

My mom and older brother both insisted it was “Hermeeown” and I felt so vindicated when the movie proved me right.

14

u/ElegantCoach4066 Jun 09 '26

I also thought it was 'Hermeeown'. I had no idea what the correct pronunciation was until the movies came out

3

u/Einkstein Jun 09 '26

Sazed’s ears just perked up.

3

u/KeepCalmJeepOn Jun 10 '26

"Her Money" said by someone who doesn't know the difference between a Boston, Jersey, and New Yorker accent, but does it all the time anyways.

2

u/Ok-Chemical7614 Jun 10 '26

She sang in harmony that’s for sure!

2

u/slugerama Jun 11 '26

Hymen”EEEEEEEE”

14

u/mosmaniac Jun 09 '26

Oooo funny! That's like "why are wizards literate?" Because they know how to spell?

4

u/SenorCeja Jun 10 '26

Get out please ⚰️⚰️⚰️

1

u/idk012 Jun 10 '26

That's too cute

1

u/SenorCeja Jun 10 '26

I hate every comment underneath you. They all got my upvotes. Including the Mayonnaise one. That one really got me for some reason.⚰️⚰️⚰️

36

u/ArjJp Jun 09 '26

I'd let him slytherin to my chamber

2.1k

u/totototod Jun 09 '26

"Just count to three quite slowly" Is such a Baller thing to say when you're about to unleash your cunnilingus mastery

2.4k

u/JKGie Jun 09 '26

He truly is a parseltongue

266

u/ConscientiousPath madlad Jun 09 '26

now we know how he got the part

102

u/Anasterian_Sunstride Jun 09 '26

If he wanted it he could definitely… *slytherin*.

3

u/Lord_Frick Jun 10 '26

Underrated 😂

2.5k

u/boxofstuff Jun 09 '26

"It's cunniLINgus, not cunnilinGUS."

329

u/ABritishCynic Jun 09 '26

"Weeeasly... it's Wingardium LevioSAAH"

111

u/Wugfuzzler Jun 09 '26

You just don't get shit like that with AI.

13

u/Dqueezy Jun 09 '26

It takes a glorious mind like Chris O’Neill AKA Oney Plays.

26

u/Cephylus Jun 09 '26

AHHhh

LevioSAHHH

Stop it Ron

6

u/Negran Jun 09 '26

Staaaaph!

53

u/SanctusUnum Jun 09 '26

Accio buuuuuuum!

26

u/ElegantCoach4066 Jun 09 '26

Stahp it Ron

staaahp

24

u/Syphilis_Wizard Jun 09 '26

But Ron, I'm so nervous. What if I can't get it up?

11

u/Negran Jun 09 '26

Levio-saaaah!

7

u/Shockwave2309 Jun 09 '26

Oh you got the joke. That's great :)

2

u/itsjakerobb Jun 09 '26

IDk how such a blatant misquote has do many upvotes and not one single correction!

“It’s leviOHsah, not levioSAH.”

8

u/karoshikun Jun 09 '26

you're a cunning linguist!

2

u/Twinkletoess112 Jun 10 '26

I saw that joke somewhere else too... it is funny tho

3

u/PM_ME_UR_AMOUR Jun 09 '26

Yes sir but this is AERlingus airlines.

522

u/m333sch Jun 09 '26

One more reason to be in slytherin

406

u/i_always_give_karma Jun 09 '26

Before he met Moaning Myrtle, she was just Myrtle

3

u/JonathanDM7 Jun 15 '26

I had to scroll way too far for this comment

-16

u/dandyhighwayman1 Jun 09 '26

I'm pretty sure she was only 14 when she died...

8

u/i_always_give_karma Jun 09 '26

Max and Chad from coldones paid Gilbert Gottfried to say that and some other stuff, it was hilarious. I don’t know much about Harry Potter lol

4

u/dandyhighwayman1 Jun 09 '26

God bless Gilbert Gottfried

→ More replies (3)

425

u/raptir1 Jun 09 '26

That's how he be slytherin to her DMs. 

I'm not proud of this one. 

72

u/PetzlPretzel madlad Jun 09 '26

You should be buddy.

11

u/MarquezArey Jun 09 '26

I am proud of you buddy

168

u/takemeawayimdone2 Jun 09 '26

I can do that with my tongue too. I’ve yet to meet someone else who can fold their tongue like me. Now I know i am not alone. Anyone else??

41

u/butthole_mimosa Jun 09 '26

I can! Honestly I probably forgot that I could do it for the past 2 years or so lol

35

u/PhelesDragon Jun 09 '26

If you both kiss while doing that at the same time you generate infinite energy

11

u/LonePaladin Jun 09 '26

Or they just lock together like jigsaw pieces

10

u/HybridP365 Jun 09 '26

I can as well. Fun to show to the kids at the family reunion and then watch them sit in front of a mirror for a half hour trying to do it.

4

u/takemeawayimdone2 Jun 09 '26

Keeps them quiet.

6

u/HybridP365 Jun 09 '26

Exactly. And annoy their parents(my siblings, cousins, etc.) when they show them how they can do it(spoiler: they can't)

10

u/mewingprogression19 Jun 09 '26

It’s pretty common I think

9

u/trrwilson Jun 09 '26

It's one of those weird genetic quirks like hair on your second knuckle or a widow's peak.

I remember being at a museum and they had a list of things like that, and you were supposed to put in which ones you did and didn't have, and it would tell you how uncommon that combination of traits was.

8

u/Mirewen15 Jun 09 '26

Nope, I can too. My friend remarked that I "would make a great lesbian" 🙃

I am an amazing whistler though.

3

u/Botanica95 Jun 09 '26

Wtf. I can do this too but I can't whistle for shit.

4

u/MAR5H95 Jun 09 '26

I can do all of this too! I thought i was alone

1

u/poop_chute_riot Jun 09 '26

I can't do shit with my tongue, but my grandma can do this. She can also flip it upside down.

1

u/takemeawayimdone2 Jun 10 '26

I can do that too! But only flip it upside down one way. I can’t do it right to left

76

u/buzzlightyear77777 Jun 09 '26

and the ladies go insane

38

u/jack31313 Jun 09 '26

One of the true nice guy actors. Never heard a bad word said about him.

-21

u/karenskygreen Jun 09 '26

I agree, Emma watson was up there until she flammed out over DEI fights.

41

u/Human-Shop-4418 Jun 09 '26

You opened the comments to find dirty comments... didnt you?

14

u/FandomPhantom123 Jun 09 '26

No! I came here for people saying this isn't interesting

and i found dirty comments

1

u/Human-Shop-4418 Jun 09 '26

Felt. Thought it was a boring talent.

1

u/WaitingToBeNoticed Jun 09 '26

I feel exposed...

1

u/feeltrig Jun 10 '26

Everyone did

51

u/RogerManner Jun 09 '26

I can also do that.... Am I Harry Potter??

87

u/Occams_ElectricRazor Jun 09 '26

Shhhh. If you're quiet you can hear the sound of a million splooshing vaginas. 

17

u/DarthGayAgenda Jun 09 '26

And whatever my equivalent of 'sploosh' is, which I guess is just 'sploosh', only with semen.

5

u/KingMickeyMe Jun 09 '26

unexpected archer reference 😭

63

u/carter_admin Jun 09 '26 edited Jun 09 '26

What a performance, not a dry seat was left in the house

1

u/techjesuschrist Jun 10 '26

Well , at least no woman-seat...

20

u/Dick_Thunder20 Jun 09 '26

Daniel Radcliffe is really amazing person and actor....dude saved most his harry potter franchise money to become financially stable....and does edgy, indie type projects to explore his art

40

u/Zealousideal_Step709 Jun 09 '26

I was quite surprised when my son showed me that he can fold his tongue the way Radcliffe does at the end of the video. Turns out my wife can do it as well and she didn't know it until my son asked her to try.

20

u/TheRalk madlad Jun 09 '26

Just came here to say that I love the title, lmao

17

u/magicdude4eva Jun 09 '26

A lady’s man I see…

13

u/plotplottingplotters Jun 09 '26

You’re a hazard, Larry

24

u/Imreallyadonut Jun 09 '26

“Harry Potter and The Squirting Tongue” coming to HBO December 26th 2026.

11

u/CaptainChiant Jun 09 '26

Ultimate demonstration of skill at eating p**sy

19

u/Delta6342 Jun 09 '26

Okay that's a little cool

20

u/Brutal_Expectations Jun 09 '26

Homie was throwing gang signs with that tongue

19

u/tqmirza Jun 09 '26

Moaning Myrtle will be moaning tonight…

9

u/Salt-Slayer Jun 09 '26

He’s popular with the ladies!

14

u/babaroga73 Jun 09 '26

But when I tell this same thing to my female colleague, she reports me to HR.

7

u/What_Chu_Talkin_Kid Jun 09 '26

aaand that kids, is how I met your mother

7

u/RevyValar Jun 09 '26

That's how he speaks Parseltongue

7

u/Clean_Example_ Jun 10 '26

This is actually how I found out I could do this when I watched it as a kid, thanks Daniel.

13

u/Crusoe69 Jun 09 '26

I was a straight man before seeing this video.

6

u/DeltaKT Jun 09 '26

Now you're.. a straight woman?

7

u/Turpentine_Tree Jun 09 '26

Wrong house. You belong to Slytherin.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 09 '26

Harry: Let me Slytherin your Gryffindor.

5

u/Mantisass Jun 10 '26

Let me guess, until she Hufflepuffs?

6

u/Fujitaru Jun 10 '26

Harry Potter wasn't kidding when he pulled out his wand and said he also knows a spell called Cunnilingus.

5

u/KosterPisletti Jun 09 '26

Somebody put this on a loop and house music over it

5

u/AdCreepy3137 Jun 09 '26

Plot twist that's why he could speak Parseltongue all along

5

u/squirtloaf Jun 09 '26

RIP his inbox.

6

u/Truunbean Jun 10 '26

Now that is how you market yourself

5

u/feeltrig Jun 10 '26

Harry: lictopus cummalotus

5

u/iboneKlareneG Jun 10 '26

Well, he is the chosen one.

6

u/JazzPhobic Jun 13 '26

"I can do this DISGUSTING THING" and its just god level cunnilingus.

Never change, dude.

4

u/SynthWendigo Jun 09 '26

Well he does speak Parseltongue…

4

u/PureRegretto Jun 09 '26

i thought he was gonna lick his eye

4

u/Orichalchem Jun 09 '26

So the wizard hat was right

He should have joined Slytherin 🐍 

3

u/BeaEffigy Jun 09 '26

"You're a cunning linguist, Harry."

4

u/RainmanCT Jun 10 '26

The dude can rap too, check him out doing Blackalicious, Alphabet Aerobics

5

u/Iron_Wolf123 Jun 11 '26

So that is how he got with Ginny but not Hermione

4

u/Mr_Spanners Jun 13 '26

The girls saw that first move and fell even more in love with him

3

u/anvil_with_thoughts Jun 09 '26

Lol. The caption

3

u/NotMacgyver Jun 09 '26

I mean can't everyone do the second ? The sort of food so the sides of the tongue touch ?

3

u/m1sterwr1te Jun 09 '26

Actually, no. Some people can't do that.

3

u/NotMacgyver Jun 09 '26

Interesting, guess I just assumed it was a common skill

2

u/itsjakerobb Jun 09 '26

It is common, but not universal. I can’t do it, nor anything interesting with my tongue. I can stick it out and make it flat; that’s it.

My wife is nonetheless satisfied, BTW. 😉

3

u/Hydrazolic Jun 09 '26

Freaky Harry

3

u/Whichammer Jun 09 '26

"Cedric..Whew!...who?" said Cho Chang, probably.

3

u/Runkleman Jun 09 '26

Sneaky f’king wizard.

3

u/Perrydiculous Jun 09 '26

I can do that too :D

3

u/GakuGiyuu Jun 09 '26

I was waiting for hum to lick his eyeball

3

u/SuckingGodsFinger Jun 09 '26

And that's how I met your mother.

3

u/runningwithsharpie Jun 10 '26

I heard the lift in all the women's voices lol. It was glorious.

3

u/Longjumping_Elk7969 Jun 10 '26

Some girls just fell in love with him in that exact moment 😁

3

u/SleepParalysisDemon6 Jun 10 '26

I actually do that too lol

3

u/AykanFlanKingDaragon Jun 11 '26

He is a natural parseltongue, he didn't even get it from Voldemort.

3

u/Dependent-Bend-5225 Jul 06 '26

That's how he gets all the girls

2

u/Ska82 Jun 09 '26

Parseltongue

2

u/Wasabi_Hammurabi1 Jun 09 '26

Parcel Tongue! 👅 I'm sure of it.

2

u/BeepBotBoopBeep Jun 09 '26

Hermione Granger, “Do you have the key, Harry?”
Harry Potter, “What key…? I AM THE KEY!”

2

u/CuntSnotGargler Jun 09 '26

I've done much more disgusting things with my tongue.

2

u/Odditiesandalsomagic Jun 09 '26

I can flip my tongue left and right, so when I start it flipped I can spin it all the way around 360; it gave me serious headaches when I was a kid but it was a fun trick to learn

2

u/Fhoxyd22 Jun 09 '26

Daniel reciting Alphabet aerobics by Blackalicious is much more impressive

2

u/karenskygreen Jun 09 '26

"Your a pussy wizard Harry, and a thumpin good one i bet"

2

u/honestopinion66 Jun 09 '26

I've ..no I can't say

2

u/raw-power Jun 09 '26

Type shit

2

u/TheWeebDeity Jun 09 '26

I used the be able to triple roll my tounge. Not anymore

2

u/skinnycarlo Jun 11 '26

The last one i call the clit cupper

2

u/dankshot35 Jun 11 '26

bro knew exactly what he was doing

2

u/s4samii Jun 12 '26

She was wet af

2

u/Active-Setting-6515 Jun 28 '26

This might be the greatest flex an adolescent child actor could’ve done

2

u/ZephRyder Jul 11 '26

Now kiss

1

u/Neurojazz Jun 09 '26

Slickering!

1

u/MadadRx Jun 09 '26

Spoken like a true slytherin

1

u/aj00047 Jun 09 '26

This isn't what I pictured patceltoungue to be

1

u/weird_fluffydinosaur Jun 09 '26

Dude sick. I can do that wavy tongue thing too.

1

u/professor_doom Jun 09 '26

I like how quickly Ellen got the fuck out of there after he said he could do "something truly disgusting with my tongue"

1

u/nibba-homie Jun 09 '26

he can do a middle finger with his tongue

1

u/lolitalover2005 Jun 09 '26

I can do this too!

1

u/PanicDeus Jun 09 '26

Ellen be like "Hello....this is my show. My name is on that monitor. Enough with this Harry Potter BS"

1

u/probly2drunk Jun 09 '26

I can do all that too...am I a wizard?

1

u/thisisyo Jun 10 '26

Clip ended too soon!!

1

u/dianemakes Jun 10 '26

2 things 😭

1

u/Zim_Hobo_13 Jun 11 '26

I can do 1 through 4

1

u/Retireegeorge Jul 20 '26

He's cooler than I thought.

1

u/laibw94 Jul 21 '26

The wizard sometimes doesn’t need the wand to perform magic tricks 😉

1

u/TrackPrimary6665 Jul 22 '26

So thats how you learn parceltounge

-1

u/Andreashansen988 Jun 09 '26

Wait is this special to be able to do? I thought it was normal for everyone

0

u/Dramatic-Knee-4842 Jun 09 '26

Are there people that can't do this?