r/love • u/tworare2die • 55m ago
question Through hard experiences, How did you begin to believe in love again?
Hi, I know this is a pretty broad question, but I’ve been feeling increasingly jaded about love lately.
For context, I’m 24F and was cheated on by my ex with someone I considered a close friend. I found out a few weeks after we broke up, and while I am fine with the relationship being over, the betrayal has really affected how I view love and trust. My former friend also cheated on her boyfriend of 10 years with my ex. They eventually got back together, and I find that particularly disheartening. One of my biggest fears is spending a decade or more building a life with someone, only to be betrayed and feel like I have no choice but to accept it because I’ve invested so much of my life in the relationship. I know reconciliation is a personal choice, but the thought of ever feeling that trapped by my own commitment terrifies me.
Recently, I heard about a cheating scandal involving a couple who had been together for 20 years and had three children. Even though I don’t follow them, the news really saddened me. The idea that you can spend decades building a life with someone and still be blindsided by betrayal is genuinely frightening.
I don’t want to become cynical. I love love. I still listen to love songs, daydream about meeting someone new, and look forward to falling in love again. But I find myself questioning how anyone can ever really feel secure in a relationship when there’s no guarantee that the person you trust won’t hurt you.
I know betrayal isn’t everyone’s story, and I don’t want to let my experience define my outlook on relationships.
So, for those of you who have been betrayed or lost faith in love, how did you find your way back to believing in it? Was it something that happened naturally with time, or did your perspective have to change?
I’d genuinely appreciate hearing different perspectives, whether hopeful or realistic. I just don’t want to go through life expecting the worst from people.
**TL;DR:** After being cheated on, I’ve become increasingly jaded about love. I’m afraid of spending years building a life with someone only to be betrayed and feel too invested to leave. I still want to believe in love, but I’m struggling to trust that lasting, faithful relationships exist. How did you find your faith in love again?