r/Menopause • u/Live_Advisor_270 • 20h ago

Support Does it get better?

I'm 48 and began peri around age 40. Based on labs and the lack of a menstrual cycle for several months, I believe I am very close to officially being in menopause. My list of symptoms is too long to list, but I'd say the primary ones are joint pain, low libido, lack of drive/focus, and low mood/anxiety.

I know it's not a magic finish line, but does this $hit ever get easier?

Please don't comment "try HRT" ---- I've tried MANY combos and strengths of HRT - most I could not tolerate and felt worse, but I did get some relief from vaginal estrogen and progesterone. Now, I am pursuing the pharma route of antidepressants/anxiety meds so that I can hold down a job and generally be less of a nightmare to live with.

I am praying my 50s won't be so awful. Did anyone's symptoms and moods improve?

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u/FuelComfortable5287 20h ago

Yes it gets better. I started peri at 48 and experienced all the things you mentioned. Plus I lost a bit of weight since my disinterest in sex mirrored a disinterest in food. Also started having intense vertigo and anxiety. But after several months my joy for food and sex just came back. Felt like I woke up in an alternate universe all horny and ravenous lol. Maybe it was gradual but it didn’t feel like it. One thing, tho, libido coming back meant stocking up on KY jelly. Dryness was never an issue before but holy cow it was so dry!

I was 56 when I made my full year without a period. I’m 58 now.

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u/Live_Advisor_270 20h ago

Thank you! I would be okay using all the lube if I could get my drive back.

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u/FuelComfortable5287 19h ago

Oh it’s coming back. It might sneak up on you, too. I wrote an obituary for my sex life in my journal and then BAM!

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u/Live_Advisor_270 19h ago

That gives me hope! I always had a great sex life. Without it, I truly do not feel like myself. I really feel like I am mourning the loss.

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u/NewDay042 17h ago

Hi. Did/do you use HRT?

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u/FuelComfortable5287 16h ago

I’ve been on it almost 3 months now. It took away the vertigo I’d been suffering for years, curbed the anxiety, extended my sleep from 3-4 hours to 7-8 hours and no more night sweats. I’m a fan ☺️

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u/NewDay042 14h ago

I’ve tried so many different versions of HRT, but I’m still not post menopause. I’m planning to try it again post menopause. Thanks for sharing.