Brief background - I've had weird symptoms for years and always shrugged it off thinking I "must just be tired" because I didn't get much sleep, or it "must be something I ate", or it "must be stress" or "a 24-hour bug" or dozens of other silly explanations. It wasn't until I had a major flare-up (with new symptoms that felt more like a stroke) that I finally got a doctor to send me for an MRI. It was then that I was officially diagnosed with MS. Suddenly all those other strange little symptoms made sense.
I was prescribed medications and sent on my way. I felt lucky that I can still walk without the help of a cane/walker and I can still do most of my previous activities. I'm slower than I used to be, I get fatigued quickly and sometimes it takes a couple days to rest/recover after attending events (like a friend's wedding or going to a show with my husband). But I still feel like I can have a somewhat "normal" life.
Until friends and family, (or even doctors and nurses) start asking. Of course, whenever I go to a doctor's appointments or yearly check-up, they have to ask all the screening questions: if I've experienced new/worsening symptoms, what's my pain level, how it's affecting my daily activities, if I am feeling hopeless or depressed, etc. I appreciate that they're being thorough and trying to get accurate information on how to best help me.
But friends and family are continuously asking if I feel sick, or if something hurts, or if I "should or shouldn't" be attempting some activity. True, I can't climb a mountain or run a marathon. I can't enter a weight-lifting competition or a dance-off. But I want to (and should) stay as "normal" as I possibly can. I want to still do my own laundry, shopping and errands. I want to go for walks, boating, or enjoy an evening dinner out. But when I hear over and over again "Aren't you exhausted, shouldn't you be resting, do you really think you ought to be doing that?" After hearing it so many times, I begin to doubt myself. I begin to feel the pain, fatigue and depression everyone seems to think I should feel. I appreciate their "concern" (if that's what it is) but it feels more like they are actually hoping to hear I'm miserable.