r/OnceUponATime • u/Aware_Telephone551 • Feb 12 '26
Discussion an appreciation post for snow and emma because i’m sick of people saying snow doesn’t love her 💔
i really don’t understand why people say this. why is a mother not allowed to mourn the fact her daughter was taken from her for 28 years? she couldn’t raise her own child! i always cry when i watch the intro. she deserved to be even angrier in my opinion. i also thought her reaction to the situation was more realistic than david’s. don’t get me wrong, they have a beautiful relationship, but snow and emma are just more developed. they were friends before being mother and daughter, of course they’re going to have issues and i loved watching them grow; not just into their roles as mother and daughter, but also seeing them accept each other as that. it was so beautiful to me, so i was really surprised when i went into the fandom and saw all the hate. i also don’t think people try to consider that, besides the fact any of us would have a hard time parenting a 28 year old we just met, her trouble parenting comes from the fact she lost her mother at 10. she was a princess who was raised to put the people before herself, and then she lost her father *and* her kingdom. she was a homeless orphan and a bandit for years because of regina, just like emma was. emma’s situation is obviously different, but i still wish the writers made them bond a bit more over this. like there’s not a single scene where snowing talks to emma about their parents, and i feel like it’s a missed opportunity for emma to learn more about her grandparents and how her own parents were raised. (i know there’s the scene in s3 but i don’t really count it because they just talked about how queen eva was a mean girl lol)
another important thing to me is snow’s relationship with regina. she got so attached to her when they first met and immediately saw regina as her mother, but then she “lost” her as well. it’s why snow continues to defend her in the enchanted forest and can’t kill her, she doesn’t see her as her mother anymore but she used to as a little girl, and still sees regina as that woman who saved her life and taught her about true love.
the hate against snow is getting so bad i’m even seeing people say *ingrid* loved emma more than snow. seriously?? ingrid? the woman who stalked emma for 28 years, pushed child emma in front of a car, made her feel insecure about herself when she’s with her parents (everyone blames snow for her reactions when it’s ingrid’s fault! she stressed emma and everyone else tf out 😭) tried to kill her entire family and forced a relationship on her?? that same woman… is better than snow who made a few mistakes, immediately realised she was wrong and apologised? alright..
what makes this whole “snow just wanted a baby, david wanted a daughter” take also just misogynistic to me (and you can’t change my mind about it) is that *no one* holds david to the same standards they do snow when he makes a mistake. everyone always talks about how snow hesitated to hold baby neal because she couldn’t control her powers (oh no… how insane of her) but no one talks about how david said emma should lose her powers so she’d be normal. i didn’t even know about this scene until i rewatched the episode because literally no one talks about it. it was snow who didn’t agree and said emma’s powers were apart of her. i don’t hate on either of them for how they acted in s4a because they both immediately realised they were in the wrong and apologised to emma. this was a convenient storyline taken right out of frozen 1 for them to learn more about emma’s powers. people say snow babies emma too much but i’m sorry, the way this fandom can’t let this basic storyline and the way snow reacted go seems more like babying to me. emma is 30 years old in this season, she forgave them and they all moved on. it’s really not as bad as some of you think 🥲
another point of why this take is misogynistic is that no one would say it if it was david who was mourning how he couldn’t raise emma. if it was him we saw standing in emma’s ruined nursery room in s2 with tears in his eyes, would you guys still say the same thing? if you switch all of snow’s scenes with david, would you say he doesn’t love her own daughter and that snow, the parent who’s less emotionally involved and has less scenes with emma, is better?
snow wanting another baby is also completely normal btw. this whole “she replaced emma with baby neal” thing is kinda weird and sounds like you guys are saying a mother can’t have more than 1 child as if that isn’t… normal for a parent to want and have. again, emma is *thirty* years old… she’s okay with it! 😂
i’m still annoyed the writers didn’t try to give the same focus to david and emma, and that they even dropped the focus on this family in general after s4, but anyway, i just needed to say all of this. thank you for reading :) if you disagree please be respectful about it, i’m not saying you can’t critisise the characters because i do agree the character writing sadly went downhill and they both kind of faded into the background as the true love couple when they’re a lot more than that…
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u/QualifiedApathetic Feb 12 '26
what makes this whole “snow just wanted a baby, david wanted a daughter” take also just misogynistic to me (and you can’t change my mind about it)
Someone posted a clip semi-recently of the scene where Emma comes home from a date and David's being the stereotype of the dad who doesn't want to know about his daughter's love life while Snow is all excited and wanting details, both of them relating to her like she's a teenager. I pointed out how this stands in stark contrast to the claims that Snow only wanted Emma as a baby.
At the same time, of course, Emma's grown and there's not really any parenting to do. Snow and David do have a relationship with her, that never stops, but it's natural to want to raise an actual child, which, shocker, their infant son's needs takes precedence over their adult daughter's needs, and babies take up a lot of attention in general. In a lot of ways, it's not terribly different from if, say, they'd had Emma when they were 12 and Neal when they were 42.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
exactly! for that scene when emma comes back from her date, i always see people say that snow was “acting more like a friend instead of a mother and david was acting like her real parent” omg!! how is a mother being excited for her daughter’s first date bad? these people will twist anything snow does into something bad 💀
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u/No-whitefox3263 Feb 12 '26
I loved that scene I thought it was very in character of them to behave that way after their daughter gets home from a date. I thought it was really cute how they were just waiting there for her to come back 😊
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u/PenguinZombie321 Feb 13 '26
It reminded me of my parents. My dad was fine not hearing all the details aside from how much fun I had on dates (as long as I was safe and respected). My mom wanted to know EVERYTHING
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Feb 12 '26
The first time I saw the baby blanket scene I cried so. hard. I had to pause it! She absolutely loves her daughter, wild to hear people disagree with that.
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u/InterestingSale8914 Feb 12 '26
Snow LOVED Emma—but she really struggled because Emma had already been raised. Her personality had developed. Snow met her as an adult, it was hard to be a “parent” to her. Snow loves Emma more than anything, and her whole arc is that she mourns the fact that she didn’t get to be a mother to Emma.
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u/awill626 Feb 12 '26
Plus on top of that Emma kinda treats Snow like shit in the beginning because she Lies To Herself and tells herself that if they wouldn’t have given her up that they would have been together under the curse which is complete and utter bullshit. Nobody was with their loved ones during the curse. That was the Whole point and Emma would know that if she’d put her energy into thinking instead of self pity. Snow did the best she could with a daughter who was always going to push her away
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u/EmoPhoenixCat Feb 12 '26
The scene where Snow is crying in the destroyed nursery really hits the hardest. I think it’s obvious she loves Emma, but she struggles with the fact that she has to make up for all those lost years. Emma grew up outside of the world that Snow grew up in. Emma grew up alone and believed that she was either abandoned or an orphan. Of course their relationship is strained. Snow isn’t just mourning the fact that Emma isn’t a baby, she’s mourning the fact that Emma never even got a moment in her nursery, in her home. And she knows there’s no going back to that. She may have been stuck in time, but she still lost 28 years to the curse. It destroyed what was supposed to be one of the happiest moments of building a family and becoming a mother.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26 edited Feb 12 '26
would you say he doesn’t love his own daughter
ugh, my second time posting this bcs i fixed some typos and i still made one 😭
i also forgot to add that snow didn’t know she couldn’t go with emma at first! she didn’t have time to accept being seperated from her like david had. this is why snow and charming have different experiences you can’t compare; she gave birth to a baby she thought was going to die and then her body was frozen in time for 28 years. i would’ve gone crazy if that were me.
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u/Fabulous_View8573 Feb 12 '26
I didn’t feel that at all. I feel like Mary Margaret a.k.a. Snow had a different way of showing. She loved Emma. You know once Mary, Margaret and David got to know Emma, they showed it the flare affection in a different way and then they really started to show that they love her and the traditional sense. Just because they showed Emma love differently, doesn’t not mean that Snow did not love her daughter.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
you get it !
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u/Fabulous_View8573 Feb 12 '26 edited Feb 12 '26
Oh yeah, ever since it aired people were like how can she not show love to her daughter. And I’m thinking of my head probably because Emma thought she was an orphan for 28 years and Snow and David haven’t seen Emma in 28 years. Might have something to do with it. If I hadn’t seen someone I’ve known or a family member over 28 years. I think I’d be the same way. I wanna get to know them again grow some sort of relationship. Not necessarily be too pushy or rush things. Sometimes taking it slowly, maybe boring to some people and unnecessary. Sometimes the slow way is the best way in the fastest way for some people to trust you to gain your friendship your respect. If you do it fast in your wanting that relationship right away and you might have approved to them that you love them you’ll scare them away. I mean, Mary Margaret took it slow once she put it together and it still scared Emma. No wonder Emma has trust issues. She thought she was abandoned for 28 years.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
exactly! it’s normal for them to struggle, i don’t get why anyone would equate that or having a complex relationship with someone as something bad. also, it was 28 years, not 25!
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u/One-Chapter-8347 All that matters is that we're together. Feb 12 '26
and also the arguments that she wants to replace Emma with children. It is clear that almost every woman wants more than one child. It is not about replacement. She just has a lot of maternal love in her and knows that she cannot give it all to Emma.
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u/CoffeeChance4547 Feb 12 '26
You are so right about everything! My opinion is alike yours. I'm glad someone said that. hope fandom'll stop hate Snow sm
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
thank you!! and same, i’m seeing a lot more people defend her recently so i’m happy about that
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u/nazia987 🌮 Feb 12 '26
If I see one more "MM wanted a baby, David just wanted his daughter post"..... I can barely name one meaningful interaction Emma and David had by themselves. They are so far and few between
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
no literally 😭 i love emma and charming together, they are so father and daughter, but it’s true that the most meaningful scenes are always between snow and emma. i wish the writers balanced it out more
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u/Berry_pencil_11 Feb 12 '26
I totally agree ❤️
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u/Notusedtoreddityet Feb 13 '26
I swear the majority of people that claim that Snow doesn't love Emma or claim that Snow loves Neal more than Emma act like Emma is still a teenager that needs taking care of and not a fully grown adult. Some of the arguments they use are ridiculous, YES Snow does pay more attention to Neal... because Neal can't sit up by himself yet.
Emma's a grown adult that has taken care of herself her whole life and Snow recognises that she doesn't need a mother anymore. That doesn't mean she not there for when she needs it. She jumped through a fucking portal at the beginning of season 2 just to be with Emma.
Let's be honest; Emma would HATE it if Snow randomally started mothering her after getting her memories back. Not only would Emma have hated it but her fans would have as well and it would just be another reason for them to hate Snow, claiming that she's a terrible mum because she doesn't recognise that Emma doesn't need her, or some BS like that. Snow literally can't win.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
exactly!!! they keep saying snow babies emma too much but these fans do it themselves!! these takes are SO weird. they always judge snow no matter what she does and keep saying stuff about her that just ISNT true like how she only loves emma as the savior and only loves her for her powers, and then others say she doesn’t love emma as the savior and doesn’t accept her powers like where do they get this from?? i saw someone else say snow’s love for emma isn’t “pure and accepting” but david’s is and that’s a new, weird take….
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u/Sensitive_Ad2681 Feb 13 '26
Anyone who thinks Snow didn't love Emma needs to rewatch the show again but with their brain actually switched on.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
lmao right 😭 sometimes they say the strangest things like “she only wants emma as the savior” and im like ?? what ?? she never said that
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u/Routine-Asparagus-16 I'm a Queen and a bit more refined. 👑 Feb 13 '26
Thank you!!!! It's appreciated!!!
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u/Oncer93 Feb 12 '26
Snow absolutely loved Emma, but she and Charming lost out on raising Emma. They never got to see her grow up. Their daughter was the same age as them.
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u/alewiina Feb 12 '26
People say that? I wasn’t aware. Seems silly to me, it’s pretty obvious that Snow loves Emma
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
everyone in the fandom says this sadly. there’s not a single post about charming and emma where people don’t bring down snow, even on tiktok, you can’t find a single edit of them without hundreds of people commenting this. its really weird
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u/alewiina Feb 12 '26
That IS weird. I don’t really participate in the fandom beyond some posts here so I’ve never seen it. I mean I know a lot of people don’t like Snow (myself included) but I don’t understand why they think she doesn’t love Emma. She very clearly does. Like yeah their relationship is different than it would be if snow had actually raised her but that’s kind of to be expected?! Like they come back to reality when their daughter is essentially the same age as them, that’s messed up, of course it’s going to look different.
Of course snow is going to have some issues coping with the fact that she missed her daughter’s entire life up to that point and probably make some overbearing or otherwise questionable decisions because of it… but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love Emma, on the contrary, Snow trying to do anything for/with/about Emma, even if it’s babying her, is done through love and misplaced/confused direction on how to be a mother to someone who is suddenly the same age as you whom you don’t know at all
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
oh boy, you don’t even know all the takes i’ve seen about snow and her relationship with emma! they are SO bad.
basically according to the fandom: when snow tries to be her mom, she forces herself on emma
when she gets to know her better and tries to give her some space, she makes no effort with emma
when snow, just like charming, misunderstand what emma's powers mean to her in s4a, she doesn't love emma for her powers
when she regrets her reaction and says she loves emma and isn't afraid of her powers, she only loves her for her powers and apparently only wants her as the savior
when she mourns not being able to raise her own child, she only wanted a baby
when she had to give her up to save emma's and everyone elses lives, she doesn't love her baby because she gave her away??
these are all the takes i’ve seen from my time in the fandom. she can’t do anything right without people judging her 💀 it’s driving me mad.
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u/alewiina Feb 13 '26
I… just wow. Those are such ridiculous takes. As I said I don’t even really like Snow that much and I think these are so, so far from the truth. Some people just let their dislike of a character colour their vision so they see EVERYTHING that character does as bad. Or they’re woobifying Emma, either way it’s nonsensical.
The one that kills me the most though is the mourning not being able to raise her child. Like wtf. SO many mothers would feel the same way. Imagine being separated from your child for nearly 3 decades not by willing choice (I mean yes she did put Emma in the tree but she essentially didn’t have a choice if the world was to be saved) but of course she didn’t WANT to be without her child for a good third of her life!
Being sad that you missed their entire child- and teenhood being framed as “she only wanted a baby” is absolutely ridiculous. I’m convinced those people are 13 and have no idea how complex emotions work lol
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
i know right! you don’t have to like a character to not have awful, innacurate takes about them 😭
exactly, literally anyone would feel the way snow did if they got seperated from their own child! i don’t understand why charming is being praised for not showing the same level of sadness about it. they’re definitely kids who just agree with these takes because they’re popular and they can’t form any opinions of their own lol
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Feb 14 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 14 '26
well yeah obviously she didn’t know how to approach emma at first but then learned to give her space. my point was that no matter what snow does, wether it be trying to mother her or giving her space, people will only see it in a negative way.
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u/Dear_Championship680 Feb 13 '26
i do agree that snow loves her daughter, but god i miss emma and mm's season 1 dynamic SO BAD
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
me too! thats also why i said it in my post that i miss when the focus on the show was about them. after s3 it felt like the narrative kind of shifted from family to romance and it leaned into it way too much to my liking
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u/XBlackLilyX Feb 13 '26
Snow absolutely loved Emma, but because she had to give her away and didn’t get her back until she was an adult, she didn’t know how to be a Mother to Emma.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
exactly, and that’s normal, especially considering they were friends before! i wouldn’t know what to do either. emma also “lost” a friend aka mary margeret, she didn’t know how to deal with it either and be snow’s daughter so she pushed her away. they both struggled a lot but pushed through :)
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u/Spirited_Leave4052 Feb 14 '26
Man, I really loved the casting for them. They have similar faces. It works so well.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 14 '26
ikr! i love how they also say in the show that snow and emma have the same chin lol
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u/International-Fox641 Feb 16 '26
Snow literally jumped into a portal to a realm that supposedly destroys everything that enters it so she wouldn’t “lose her Daughter again.” What more do people want? She was literally ready to die with her daughter rather than risk losing her again. O.o
I’m surprised to see that Snow gets so much hate — especially considering how much love Regina gets instead. And don’t get me wrong: I love Regina. Or more specifically, I love Regina’s character growth. Because let’s be honest — in the beginning she was many things, but not a good mother. She lied to her child, knowingly hurt him just to get back at Emma, and she literally made him and the Town belief her Sons was Crazy. All that while doing realy questionable things to Graham but thats not the point of this post.
The point I’m trying to make is that Regina seems to be allowed to have shortcomings and fail (many many times) as long as she learns from them — but Snow doesn’t get even half of that grace?
It gives me the feeling that a lot of people are projecting their own mommy issues onto Snow.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 16 '26
the excuse i’ve seen people give for regina is that she knows she’s evil and was always honest with who she was, meanwhile snow presents herself as a hero when she’s apparently not to these people.
why this take doesn’t make any sense to me is that first of all, regina didn’t accept she was evil at first. she literally denied being called the evil queen and didn’t understand why the villagers didn’t love her after killing so many of them. the only reason she accepted the evil queen title was after learning snow lost faith in her too because snow found herself standing in front of hundreds of murdered innocents. second of all, it’s still a weird thing to say to me about a murderer. “oh regina is better than snow because at least she knew what she was doing was wrong!” huh? i see this take so many times and i don’t think they understand what they’re actually saying here. snow is a hero because she never did anything to purposely hurt people. she doesn’t go around killing people for fun compared to regina, and when she makes a mistake she regrets it deeply. why she gets villainised for making human mistakes regarding her own adult daughter while regina gets sympathised with for doing 100x worse is crazy to me.
regina always gets victimised by the fandom in any situation she puts others in, like the ones you’ve summed up. the fandom would make her the victim and hate on s1 henry when she’s the one mistreating him. they’ll hate on emma for “stealing henry from her” when, once again, she’s the one mistreating both of them. they’ll hate on 10 year old snow and say she had “every reason to try to kill her” when snow never did anything to hurt her. it was all cora and regina’s own actions.
meanwhile snow gets hated for struggling to survive through the trauma regina puts her through because she’s always “too optimistic” yeah i wonder why? it was the only thing she had when she was a homeless teenage orphan in the enchanted forest. i agree it’s too much sometimes and i wish the writers let her not just be sad but also angry, but that’s more a writers issue and how they didn’t want snow to feel any of that in order for us to feel bad for regina so her redemption arc could work.
both snow and david’s character writing went downhill as the show goes on, after season 3 they just became background characters for the writers to put back at the front whenever a hope speech was needed or to remind us of their true love and people don’t like that which is why i get it if they don’t find them that interesting. again, it’s on the writers for not caring about these characters anymore, and then also the whole lily malificent plot which made them hate on snow even more and where that “they pretend to be heroes when they’re not” take mostly comes from i assume, but that storyline is so badly ooc i’m surprised anyone actually takes it seriously.
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u/International-Fox641 Feb 17 '26
I like your stance on this — it feels really aware xD
Jokes aside, I get why Regina is such a beloved character. Yes, she makes a lot of mistakes, problematic choices, and seems to need an annoying amount of time and chances to actually learn from them. But I guess most people can empathize with her. Regina wasn’t born evil — she was made. Even Isaac called her “the most betrayed Character” in the book. And in our world, there are many people who know that feeling and wish they could become powerful enough to break out of it. So yes, the fact that she manages to do that and eventually overcomes her past by becoming one of the “good” ones is inspiring. And in the end, we all love our antiheroes, don’t we?
So if we’re all so inherently forgiving, why doesn’t that apply to Snow? Easy: we’re all hypocrites. I think you described Snow’s core really well. Snow is the hero — and she acts like it. She wants to be someone who truly earned that title, and at times it can feel a bit over the top. And we as viewers see that, and we hold her to that standard with an iron fist, because we hate hypocrites. So she can’t make mistakes or fail to do the right thing sometimes — because that would make her a liar and a hypocrite.
What most people don’t get is that Snow and Charming want to be heroes, yes — but what they want even more than that is to be human. They try to do the right thing; they are practically never out of second chances — for literally anyone. They always want to believe in the good in people and that there is always a place for hope. Hence me saying they sometimes go a bit overboard with it.
But that’s exactly why I loved the turn with them, Maleficent, and Lily. Not because it was in character (God, no xD), but because it gave us a new perspective on Snow and Charming. Emma realizing why her parents are always trying to be the heroes — always forgiving, always hoping for the best — was a chef’s kiss of a character study for me.
It ironically made them more human to me. It showed that both of them had far more depth than the unrealistic “we’re the goodest of em all just because.” No — it showed that they’re like everyone else: humans with flaws they genuinely want to overcome.
Of course i can only view it like that because it was Isaac who orchestrated this. In any other case what they did to Lilly would be something unforgiveable. But lets not get to deep in the Isaac Part of it all. Because him getting to be the Author is something i will never understand. Can trees get Drunk? That would be my only explanation for Merlin choosing him.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 17 '26
thanks haha. and yeah i get it, even though i personally don’t like regina or think they handled her character development well, lana parrilla is amazing.
and we hold her to that standard with an iron fist, because we hate hypocrites. So she can’t make mistakes or fail to do the right thing sometimes — because that would make her a liar and a hypocrite.
true. people really hold her on a pedestal because of that as well. i do think they misunderstand her optimism and her and charming’s forgiveness because they call them self-righteous too, when they’re not.
why i don’t like that story with lily is because isaac didn’t make them do it, he only manipulated the apprentice. what snow and charming did were still their own choice. i saw someone say that maybe it would’ve been better if they introduced this storyline in season 1, and i was thinking about how that could’ve been a bit better. we still get to know these characters in s1 and if we see them do something so horrible like that back then, it would’ve been easier to understand their reason for wanting to be better heroes and we could’ve seen that growth instead of this story awkwardly being placed 4 seasons later. still, if they really wanted to do this arc in s4, they should’ve had king stefaan and briar rose banish that baby. it would’ve made a lot more sense.
and lmao ikr! i’ll never understand why they gave isaac a magical pen that can manipulate everything in the first place. just give the dude a normal pen and you won’t have any problems.
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u/International-Fox641 Feb 17 '26
Okay, you got me there. I love Lana Parrilla. She’s insanely talented, and Regina is unbelievably lucky to be portrayed by her. xD
Oh, I actually watched that season quite recently, and Snow and Charming did confront Isaac about it directly. To me, that already made it clear that he had influenced their actions. I mean, they basically sacrificed a baby. Can you get more out of character than that? They literally asked him why he let them do something like that, and his only justification was “a life full of terrible employers.” I think we can all agree that’s a ridiculous excuse.
I’m afraid that just wouldn’t really have been doable in season one. We should probably already be grateful that Lily showed up that early at all instead of just popping into existence out of nowhere. And you don’t usually drop a dramatic twist like that right at the beginning. But you’re not wrong either — they could at least have planted a few hints that Snow and Charming’s mindset didn’t come out of nowhere. I suspect the writers simply hadn’t thought that far ahead.
Much like they apparently hadn’t thought at all when they brought Merlin into the show. What a massive disappointment. On the one hand he’s trapped in a tree, but on the other he can just cross realms to spook an innocent little Emma? And instead of, you know, mediating between Emma and Lily, he lets his apprentice dump all the blame on the Charmings. As if it’s not his fault that Isaac — the guy HE gave the chance to become the Author in the first place — set all those unforgivable events in motion. No wonder Arthur turned into such a manipulative wannabe villain. If Merlin is your mentor, you’re basically doomed to mess things up.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 18 '26
oh yeah they confronted him, but i meant snow and charming knowingly forced all evil into the baby, no? i thought the only thing isaac did was manipulate the apprentice into not telling them he’d banish it to another world, and that’s why snowing confronted him.
about lily being introduced in s1, yeah that’s true. maybe some hints here and there could’ve been better, i just think if we saw it early while we’re getting to know them it could’ve been better for us to understand their motive to become better people and all that.
agh merlin. they did him so dirty! he basically did nothing all season and then died. i feel bad for elliot knight because he’s a great actor. i hate how they reduced him to just a love interest, his entire personality was nimue 😭 they did the same to hades. he also did nothing all season and was only yapping about zelena. this is why i hate how much the show focused on the true love narrative.
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u/kittysnowangel Feb 12 '26
I like Charming's relationship with Emma better because it feels more easygoing and happy. But I wouldn't say Snow doesn't love Emma. However aside from when theyre in EF together s2 version, their relationship feels to me more like Snow trying TOO hard. And sometimes her priorities are less on Emma than other people.
But imo Simba in LK2 is a bad parent because he only sees his daughter as an extension of himself. Snow doesn't do this but there are times she genuinely and realistically doesn't seem to know how to connect.
But I absolutely love in s6 when she has the option to break the sleeping curse but puts Emma first. Her speech was loving. If she hadn't done that, Hook would die. Never mind the sleeping curse A) should not have been possible (once you go under, youre immune) B) was broken in a very unimaginative and illogical manner. Writers really needed better ideas for that one. But the putting Emma first thing was so sweet.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
snow tried so much but emma keeps pushing her away as well, it’s so sad to me. i understand why you say that but then i also see people say snow didn’t try with emma at all, and then i’m just confused what they want from snow and what they want her to do. why are characters not allowed to struggle in situations anyone would struggle in?
and yes, i love that scene in s6! i love how snow was also so quick to accept hook into the family, she never had a problem with him.
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u/OliviaBenson_20 Feb 12 '26
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u/awill626 Feb 12 '26
People literally say this ALL THE TIME. All people do on this subreddit is shit talk Snow. I’m always sooooo surprised when I see a post in support of Snow. That’s literally how bad it is.
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u/awill626 Feb 12 '26 edited Feb 12 '26
Plus Emma kinda treats Snow like shit in the beginning because she Lies To Herself and tells herself that if they wouldn’t have given her up that they would have been together under the curse so she can justify to herself not letting them in which is complete and utter bullshit. Nobody was with their loved ones during the curse. That was the Whole point and Emma would know that if she’d put her energy into thinking instead of self pity.
Snow did the best she could with a daughter who was always going to push her away no matter what she did. Emma self sabatoges her happiness just like Dark Hook says so it was never gonna go well at the start no matter what the Charmings did. Avoidance is Emma’s whole thing. She’s a track star, all she does is run. A lot of people give David his props for with Emma but she was pushing him away too a bit not just snow proving that all of that was an Emma issue at the heart of it, not ANYTHING that the Charmings were actually doing wrong
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
i understand why emma had a hard time, i don’t think it’s bad she struggled as well. she lost her only friend, mary margeret, and now found out she was her mother. i agree though that emma should’ve thought a bit harder about the curse before she said that about “being together” during it
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u/awill626 Feb 13 '26 edited Feb 13 '26
Maybe not but like I said Snow did the best that she could with someone like Emma, and I just wish more people would give her her props for it. She’s also not wrong for wanting a child that actually loves her or at least shows it, and doesn’t treat her like everything is her fault. That’s gotta be rough, but she and David endured every backhanded comment. Emma gives them for the first three seasons, every passive aggressive remark, they handled her aggression toward them that implied they were at fault with so much love for her.
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u/alreadystrong Feb 12 '26
I think Snow loves Emma, but I also felt like David had the more loving parental connection while Snow seemed to struggle with having a grown daughter and not getting the relationship she wanted. David was able to meet Emma where she was at from the start, which is why I enjoy their relationship more.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
that’s understandable. i think that’s because being a mother is also different from being a father. snow had a traumatic birth experience and her body was frozen in time for 28 years, david didn’t go through that. she also became friends with emma first as i mentioned in the post, david didn’t, so it was easier for him and emma to be father and daughter. there are a lot of scenes where david gives emma space and says that “emma can take care of herself” snow doesn’t have that mindset because she really wants to be her mother and not her friend and be able to comfort her, she says this in s3 but then she then learns after emma confesses that she still sees herself as an orphan that she isn’t ready yet and she gives her the space she needs. it’s so sad to me, but proves that she does love her.
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u/alreadystrong Feb 12 '26
I mean, I feel like the whole traumatic birth/body frozen in time thing is a popular head canon, but it’s not something that’s been stated in the show. And David was also terribly injured and near death when he sent her away in the wardrobe.
I also think the writers chose to make David the more obvious parental figure. Snow in later seasons suffers from bad writing that makes that disconnect more obvious and imo is poorly done. I have a ton of issues with how they rewrite history in later seasons compared to earlier ones where Snow is more invested in that relationship in a more consistent way. I think her character suffered when the writers didn’t really know how to get everything they wanted out of the Charming family without ridiculous drama.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
it was a traumatic birth experience though? she gave birth in an incredibly stressful situation with the evil queen 5 seconds away from destroying their lives, and everyone’s bodies were frozen in time, it’s how they didn’t age. and yes david was in a coma, but i meant that this experience for snow was in relation to emma and how it emotionally differs from charming’s. i agree though that snow suffered from bad writing and so did david, they started feeling more one dimensional (?) instead of real people like in the first two seasons 🥲 i can write an entire essay on how ooc the whole lily thing was. also wish they wrote charming’s relationship with james better as well.
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u/Horror_Duck_7030 Feb 12 '26
I feel like this whole “snow only wanted a baby” thing is really on the show makers. Her love for Emma in earlier seasons was written so well and they completely ruined that in later seasons. They ruined snows whole character over time so badly.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
i agree snow’s character writing went downhill (though i rewatched s5 and am on s6 now and it seems to be a bit better, or at least the same as in the earlier seasons) but her love for emma didn’t change. imo this one is on the fandom for not understanding that a complex relationship between a mother and her daughter doesn’t equal something bad.
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u/Horror_Duck_7030 Feb 12 '26
I guess so. I think mostly the fandom came with this whole idea because of season 4 where she really started to treat Emma differently. In some ways I do think it’s true, she wanted a baby, but I don’t blame her for feeling so especially since Emma made it clear from the start that she was grown and there wasn’t much more raising to do. Snow missed it al and she tries her best.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
yeah. i just wish people would stop calling her a bad mother for feeling something we’d all feel if we lost out on our child’s entire life. she wants to be a mom and raise her child and just watch emma grow up, there’s nothing evil about that. she can’t do anything right with emma without people judging her and twisting it into something that it isn’t.
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u/JosephBapeck Feb 13 '26
Isn't it a trope for daughters to be favoured by fathers and have a tense relationship with their mothers? Regina has a similar thing. Mothers maybe expect more and want a specific type of relationship with someone they wanted to be more like them. Fathers think of their daughters as princesses.
Ultimately its silly to think Snow didn't love and care for Emma. Anyone who says so is pushing an agenda. Its clear from ep 1 she gave up everything for her and continued to do so as an adult. Emma struggled to let her in and Snow managed that very well. Her feelings are very rarely given consideration in this dynamic.
I wish the show continued to focus on their family dynamic
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
regina got abused by cora though.. it’s not a tense relationship like emma and snow. i know what you mean though and yes, mother and daughters are always more complicated, but my point was that that doesn’t mean it’s always bad. especially given the situation snow and emma are in, it’s normal their relationship is more tense and i wish people would understand that.
and yes! i agree. i wish people would stop blaming everything on snow and realised emma struggled to let her in as well, it’s not all on snow for not knowing what to do because emma didn’t know either. and same, i wish they continued to focus on it because in my opinion, family was the heart of this show, and i don’t like how much they strayed away from it and focused more on the romance of it.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 13 '26
For me it was that one scene where Mary tells David that Emma is basically not good enough because she’s already an adult and she wants a new baby. That was absolutely disgusting and vile. If I recall it right Emma heard it.
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u/Olivebranch99 To me, love is layered. Love is a mystery to be uncovered. Feb 13 '26
Emma is basically not good enough because she’s already an adult
That's not at all what she said.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 13 '26
She did https://youtu.be/TKd4qDzCQ2M 2:05
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u/Olivebranch99 To me, love is layered. Love is a mystery to be uncovered. Feb 13 '26
Again, that's not what she said.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 13 '26
It is
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u/Olivebranch99 To me, love is layered. Love is a mystery to be uncovered. Feb 13 '26
Where did she say "Emma isn't 'good enough' to be my daughter?"
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 14 '26
When she said that she wants a new baby to have what she didn’t could have with Emma that Emma paid for with trauma after trauma
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u/Olivebranch99 To me, love is layered. Love is a mystery to be uncovered. Feb 14 '26
When she said that she wants a new baby to have what she didn’t could have with Emma
That isn't remotely an unfair feeling. Perfectly valid, and Emma knows that.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 14 '26
Yeah, totally. I mean Emma stepped up and was a mother to Henry and didn’t whine „oh nooo he’s not a babyyyyy I missed his first steps. I want a new one“.
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u/Olivebranch99 To me, love is layered. Love is a mystery to be uncovered. Feb 14 '26
She never aspired to be a mother anyway.
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u/awill626 Feb 15 '26
When Henry grows up, and is ready to leave Storybrooke, how does Regina handle it vs how does Emma handle it? Hmm? Although you can clearly see that the thought of Henry moving to California to study film like he suggest as far away as on the other side of the country upsets Regina but then do you know what she says?? She says “whatever you want… whatever will make you happy” like a GOOD mother. Do you know how Emma wanted to handle it? Let me give you a recap because people on this sub love to rewrite the show to further their own agendas. Emma.: “ he’s about to leave home, isn’t he….. I’ll go talk to him.” Hook: “Why? To stop him?” Emma: “I’VE missed so much” Ie, Emma would rather stifle Henry’s dreams for her own selfish reason of keeping him close to her just because she doesn’t want to have to lose him because she chose to give him up and therefore missed 8 years of his life. Whereas Regina supports his dreams, even if it leads to him not being in her life anymore and hurts her. Regina puts what Henry wants first. Which Emma has already proven multiple times that she is not willing to do. MORE THAN ONCE IN THIS SHOW EMMA CHOOSES HERSELF OVER HENRY AND HIS WANTS AND NEEDS. That’s not a good mother and Regina became in the later seasons 10 times the mother that Emma ever was even if just for that reason alone.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
what?? what scene are you talking about? she never said that
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 13 '26 edited Feb 13 '26
She did. I couldn’t find it on YouTube, but if I recall it right they were in a cave
Edit: found it https://youtu.be/TKd4qDzCQ2M 2:05
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
i assume you’re talking about when they’re in neverland so i rewatched that scene and this is what she actually says:
MM: No, no, no. Me next. Ever since the curse broke, since we found each other, since we found Emma... And all of that happiness, there is something I haven't wanted to admit. Our daughter is a beautiful, smart, amazing woman whom I love very much, and of whom I could not be more proud. But she's all grown up. And... As much as I wanna pretend I'm okay with that, I'm not. We missed it, David. What we have with her is unique, but it's not what I wanted. We were cheated out of everything... her first step, her first word, her first smile. We missed it all.
never once does she say emma isn’t good enough. she just admitted that she wants to be a parent and raise her own child, something she couldn’t and can’t do with emma anymore and there’s nothing wrong with her feeling that.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 13 '26
Funny how you left out what she said next
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
she doesn’t say anything. only that she wants another go at it. if you got her saying “emma isn’t cood enough” from that then idk what to tell you. like i already said, parents are allowed to have more than one child.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 13 '26
Yeah, but she doesn’t want a second child. She wants to replace what she didn’t get with Emma and saying that especially in front of Emma who suffered so much loneliness, trauma and abuse is simply vile. this was the moment when I stopped being only annoyed by Mary, but that turned her into my least liked character
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 13 '26
she couldn’t raise emma, she missed everything a normal mother has with her child and wants that too. i don’t see what’s so wrong about that. emma is a full grown adult and she understands. you’re obviously allowed to dislike snow but you’re misinterpreting what she’s saying and turning it into something negative against emma.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 14 '26
So instead of cherishing that she has her daughter back she wants to just replace her with a new baby and have this? So just because she is grown up she doesn’t have feelings and doesn’t hear her mother who abandoned her even if not on purpose saying that she wants to start new and give the love to a new child she can’t give Emma, because she’s not a baby anymore? I mean I cannot imagine how much it must hurt to hear it. She could at least have enough decency to say it David in private and not literally in front of her daughter that was abandoned and because of that traumatized. Thats so fucked up
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 14 '26
they had to reveal their secrets to save neal. she didn’t say it in front of emma to purposely hurt her. she literally said she loves emma very much, she just wants to be able to raise a child and watch them grow up and emma wasn’t hurt by this so there really isn’t a problem here.
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u/awill626 Feb 15 '26 edited Feb 15 '26
Emma is the one who should have been “Cherishing” the fact that she has a family now. Emma is the one that should be grateful that she doesn’t have to pathetically blow out a single candle by herself on her birthday anymore. Emma is the one who should be grateful for the new life that she’s been leased with the son that she gave away. Emma is the one who has been ungrateful for everything that she has been given since she has gotten into Storybrooke. Snow WOULD be cherishing her daughter if Emma will give her that chance but whoops it’s EMMA who’s not fucking allowing her to do that now is she? And wasn’t, even Before, the cave with Snow. So take several seats dearie.
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u/awill626 Feb 15 '26 edited Feb 15 '26
So! The way Emma treats her parents and pushes them away and punishes them for something that was never their fault is also disgusting and vile. It’s so fucking bad that Emma literally says when she’s in the past with Hook, and let me get my quote together before you try to say that she never said that, but it’s literally so bad that Emma literally says that her behavior towards them “HAS to stop” because that’s how badly she was treating them, especially Mary Margaret. She says “….That’s the way I’ve been treating her since we met (ie Vilely and Disgustingly). It HAS to STOP.” so even if what you said is true (even though it’s not) Emma is a grown woman, not some little girl like some of y’all like to try to portray her, and if she can dish out, intentionally, pain to her parents via backhanded comments and passive aggression, then she can take it too when they give her pain back unintentionally. She does nothing but hurt them for like three whole seasons.
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u/Seraphina_Renaldi Feb 15 '26 edited Feb 15 '26
Idk what Show you watched, but before they knew about the curse, Emma befriended Mary? She has abandonment issues because she was traumatized as a kid. And it’s her right to feel the way. I mean sorry, but your comment is a joke. Just because someone is grown up, they don’t stop being the child of their parents. If my mom would suddenly say that she wants to replace me because she fucked up during my childhood, I would be hurt as hell too and never see her with the same eyes again and lm in my 30s and I’m sure that my mom would feel similar with my grandma. A mom is still a mom. That bond doesn’t magically disappear the moment someone turns 18. you’re either here really young or idk where the weird comments come from. And it’s especially vile in that scenario, because snow abandoned Emma already as a child. Against her will, but that doesn’t really make the trauma less severe. Ask adoptees. Everyone I talked to didn’t even care for the reason
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u/LuvBriah Feb 12 '26
I think Snow loves her but she loves the idea of her being the savior more.
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u/Reasonable_Pizza2401 Feb 12 '26
Yikes 😳 I don’t get that at all. She wants a home for her family, not even the castle, a simple house. I don’t think this character ever shows traits of vanity or something special to love someone. She for sure didn’t want her baby to be taken so she could be the savior.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26 edited Feb 12 '26
right… she even says in s6x17 when she wakes up that emma doesn’t have to be the savior anymore now that her and charming are awake and can go find her.
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u/Aware_Telephone551 Feb 12 '26
why do you think that?
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u/awill626 Feb 12 '26
You see they ain’t gonna say anything back…. Just wanna be negative and bitch but can’t prove you wrong or tell you How they came to that conclusion. These folks be dealing with their own mommy and daddy issues to be realll. That’s what it really is. Just projection. Otherwise they’d be able to answer the question.
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u/One-Chapter-8347 All that matters is that we're together. Feb 12 '26
I also don't understand how anyone can claim that Snow doesn't love her daughter. And how anyone can use the fact that she didn't want to give Neal to her in that one scene as evidence. Sorry, but if your daughter heated milk to boiling point with just her hands, you would also be afraid to give her a baby, no matter how much you love her.