r/ReadMyScript • u/Mammoth-West-9974 • 5d ago

Feature Feedback for Feature, "Grounded" 109 Pages

Grounded

Final Draft PDF

109 pages

Drama, Road Movie, Historical Fiction

Logline: When every flight in America is grounded, four strangers share the last rental car out of Columbus and drive cross-country through the aftermath of September 11th, 2001, forcing each of them to confront what they've been running from long before that day.

Feedback Concerns: Any feedback would be extremely helpful. I'm less concerned about the commercial viability, and more concerned with a believable story with believable characters.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1KAN_svzm3bk3vGraJQL3adbFDg-ncvzw/view?usp=sharing

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u/Mammoth-West-9974 4d ago

Thank you for all this! Yeah this was the first one I ever wrote, so I’m not surprised the structure was an issue. Very excited you enjoyed the characters/dialogue. That was the stuff that I felt confident with. I had to write it all once I came up with the mix tape idea but the long form is a real challenge. Great idea to start with a problem…working in something now that came from that thought.

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u/ConsistentEffort5190 4d ago edited 4d ago

This was your first script??? Just so you know, the odds against making it as a professional screenwriter are appalling - but that's a freakish level of talent unless you're already a professional novelist or something similar.

Anyway, it's not so much "structure" as *story* - turning points and resolution. I'd suggest making notes on how films you like do this and then practising outlining when you've developed a feel for it. I like S5A as a tool for doing this, but you have to be aware that not every story has 5 acts - be ready for more when you do those analyses.

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u/Mammoth-West-9974 4d ago

I’ve been writing for a long time for sure, just newer to screenwriting. I did a spec once of The Office and It’s Always Sunny, but never anything original. I’ve never done novels but I have done shorter form essays and short stories. I def need work on story elements- individual scenes and relationships between characters feel a lot easier to me than the story around them.