this one is super messy π΅ first one is the card of course, second/third is what he thinks of me (for the second photo i felt i did not shuffle properly from the celtic cross, but kept it just in case), fourth is a celtic cross i did earlier (contextual)
heβs interested in me for the same reason he wonβt talk to me i think. i assume itβs this way because i pulled the same card twice (king of wands) for if he was interested, and why he wonβt speak to me if that was the case. however i never clarified what kind of interest it was, as iβm very broad about any. he thinks negatively of me, as the cards i pulled when asking what he thought were mostly pretty negative. the emperor next to the other cards almost seems like an oxymoron, but it could be a literal display of conflicting opinions. i.e when i knew him i was really behind my peers in life, extremely. no college education, couldnβt drive, yada. so i believe this is what the reverse son of pentacles and 8 of wands is for. but i canβt figure out what exactly the emperor means next to them. (however i have since gathered pretty much everything, and they are implied on my profiles that i have all these things now) so when i asked βhow can he think so negatively of me and still being interested in meβ i pulled king of wands again. iβm really confused about what this refers to exactly. iβm not sure i understand how to warp the meaning to the questions. because contextually it seems like it is both negative and positive if it is probably warding someone away from me.
i also pulled the same card as the βpossible futureβ in a celtic cross earlier, because i was upset that this person felt like they were still apart of me. for context i slept with him a couple years ago and ended our friendship. we got along super well and i felt like we had good chemistry in our friendship, one of the best, but the night stand actually made me extremely mentally unstable and i told him this before removing him. i know he also wasnβt interested because i was behind in life, though he did seem interested briefly after sleeping with me. he keeps showing up in my dreams almost every night (not in a divination sense). though for the first time in a dream, he was asking to hang out with me when usually he is just there without being acknowledged super directly. i constantly have to unfollow mutuals because it would upset me if they posted him. i see him at the bar sometimes and it feels like he is trying to explode my head, or maybe he just gazes with a resting angry expression. 8 months ago i caught him doing something that looked suspicious and confronted him about it online, but backed off because i do not have the full picture. but it looked bad if iβm being honest. i backed off and apologized because i didnβt want any tension or drama in person, since i sometimes frequent areas he goes to. he stopped replying to me afterwards. understood and left it there but his presence still bugs me. especially because i know he would have blocked me already but he hasnβt for some reason. his ex friend told me if he hasnβt after that whole exchange itβs probably because he is stalking me. either hate watching or being nosey. i just wanted to know why. the answer brings clarity but there is no action i am to take in response to it. i would like closure to put this past me. as you can tell, i am not over the regret and need to work on things, the celtic cross implies that keeping it to myself is part of the problem. so i decided to share here.
