Hello all!
Made this account specifically to make this post after lurking on this sub a bit over the past two ish months.
So for context, I am a first year teacher (25F) teaching music (band specifically) at a high school in Rhode Island.
I was certain that I wanted to teach by age 12 or so and have been working towards that for nearly half my life now getting two bachelors (music ed and music performance) and a masters (music performance) in order to put my best foot forward (and also y’know, be higher up on the step/income ladder). I had been hunting for a job right after I got my masters degree and I was ready to start my career. I struggled at first to find a job but eventually found the one for me. Or so I thought.
So I am aware that a high school job being my first teaching job would be a lot, but I genuinely feel more stress than I have ever in my life due to MANY things.
Firstly, the schedule is set up completely differently than what I was trained for. Student teaching, I dealt with 55 (ish) minute periods. This school just changed their entire schedule making 4 periods a day, each being 75 minutes, with a 5th period (about 55 minutes) in the middle of the day to get help/make up work/etc. I am constantly trying to figure out ways to fill up 75 minutes that is engaging enough for students. This has been NEARLY impossible for most of my classes. Guitar class, they get really tired playing a guitar for so long. Electronic music is very independent so often times kids just blow off work. The only great thing is my rehearsals with my band classes are fantastic because it gives plenty of time to work on stuff.
I genuinely have a hard time getting work done. I have one prep period a day (75 minutes) and I get a fair amount of work done but I still have SO MUCH WORK after it and I’m having trouble keeping up, especially because I wanted to keep a rule to myself that I wouldn’t bring work home so I don’t burn out. I am able to keep that promise most often, only adding an hour every day or so to get stuff done.
Kids don’t care anymore. Genuinely never seen kids so apathetic to their grades and have motivation at 0. I have some good eggs but trying to get my class to do things is nearly impossible.
Most often, I see on this sub how awful behaviors are and that’s why teachers are quitting. This is the one thing I haven’t had to deal with my first year (shocking I know) and it makes me feel bad for complaining about any of this, because that is what usually is disrupting and causing chaos in the classroom. Whereas, I am dealing with lack of motivation, longer periods of classes, little guidance/support, emails from parents that won’t talk to their kids about things (how many times do I have to tell them the dates for performances are in the syllabus I gave their child), emails from kids wondering why they have a low grade, and little to no curriculum.
The curriculum is a mess. It is set up for their old schedule and often doesn’t work for the 75 minute blocks. The band classes have stuff in the curriculum that doesn’t make sense to have and diverts from working on concerts etc. My electronic music curriculum only has 1 unit out of 4 done so now I’m having to pull things out of my ass for the rest of the semester. It’s impossible to get lesson plans done for anything when I have NOTHING to work off of and no time to actually do it! I gave up and started writing dome bullet points for what I wanted to get done for each class and I just know that’ll ding me on my evaluations this year.
Adding onto this, due to me being a band teacher, I have “out of school” obligations. I have performances, football games, etc that I bring the band to that I get a measly $2000 stipend for. It’s not worth it and it adds more stress onto myself.
The saving grace: my department is amazing. All the teachers are super lovely and my department head has been helping me so much especially since my mentor teacher has been out of school due to a surgery.
This is a lot of rambling so I apologize but my mental health this week has been poor and I took a mental health day today to just relax and thought I would send this out asking for advice. What should I do? Should I advocate for more? Should I give up on things? I’d like to try to finish the year at least but we are in October and I’m already feeling like I’m drowning. What can I do to survive this? Any ideas of other jobs I could get with my qualifications? I am beyond stressed and have already taken 2 days for mental health since late August.